User:Insaneular/essays/How to gain Respect

'''Warning: This essay contains strong opinions which will be voiced in as calm a way as possible but still might be disagreed with. I am not trying to offend anyone with this, merely stating what I think.''' (It's also really long, I'm sorry but I'm quite long-winded) You may also want to read: Warriors Wiki is NOT, Sandy's essay on a similar topic.

Respect

 * Well, it has come to my attention, that not just on this site, but on the whole internet, there are many people trying to become respected. (and furthermore, the whole world, though that is not the point of this essay) There's nothing inherently wrong with that. It's human nature to want attention and appreciation. But sometimes people don't know how to go about getting these things, and end up expecting more of a reward then they get, setting themselves (and others around them) up for disaster. I don't think that these people do this to be mean/annoying/etc., in fact, I used to be one myself. I don't want to go into it but on another site, when I was less mature, I said and did some stupid things and ended up getting everyone mad at me, so I know what I'm talking about.
 * So let me get to this point. On this wiki, respect is an important thing. Although the users are friendly and helpful, and it's a site with a strong community effort (that is the very nature of a wiki) there are still, of course, people who want to make their mark here and become respected. While this is (in my opinion) not very hard, oftentimes people try the wrong things and can get other users annoyed. Hopefully this essay, while being blunt, can clear up this issue.
 * First, let's look at the users that are typically thought of as the most respected. Examples: Project leaders/deputies/senior warriors, and staff. Though many people may not realize it, just active contributors, whether they have status or not, can be respected by many people. The reason many people get angry when looking for respect is because they expect to be given a special label for it. I know that it's satisfying if you get offered to be a project lead, or a moderator, or something; but I know that in my eyes, and the eyes of several other members I have spoken to, oftentimes the best users are the ones who care nothing for the special statuses. So don't think you can't be respected without them.
 * So, you probably want me to get to the actual point: How to gain respect? Well, I'm going to be blunt, because there's not much else I can say. They way I, the other project leaders, staff, and well known members got respect is- drumroll please- hard work. It might sound like I'm being self generous, but I'm telling the truth. The most surefire way to get respect, or for that matter, anything in life, is to work for it. Another important element is to not be so focused on gaining respect that you lose sight of what you're doing. What many users do is try to gain respect in a frenzy of activity, not really focusing on the edits they're making, just the amount of edits they have. Another common pitfall is just posting on talk pages, not really making any contributive edits, and then thinking that your high amount of edits means you must be well respected. The way to tell if you have been contributing to the wiki itself is to go to Special:Editcount/Username and check what percentages of User and User Talk page edits you have. If those two categories add up to more than half of your total edits, then you probably aren't contributing a lot, I'm sorry to say. I don't mean to be mean but the wiki is not a social/chat/roleplay site, and it's really meant for the main space edits. Not that being friendly is bad; it's just that chatting with people by itself will not get you respect.
 * After doing this, some users think "Wow, I've made so many edits, They'll HAVE to make me a leader/staff member/etc." Not so, I'm afraid. The very essence of respect is that it has to be given by someone else- so even when you think you've done a lot, it's still up to the rest of the community to respect you or not. That sounds harsher than it really is, because if you do just focus on your work then it's actually not that hard.
 * And as I said before, Respect doesn't always come with a label. Even if you are one of the hardest workers on the site, it's a fact that there are a limited number of staff/project lead spots, and not everyone can get them. But trust me, if you work hard, and are mature in all exchanges with other users, respect will come your way, and you will know it. I can't really put it into words but if you are respected, you already know it. If you're not, right now you are either wishing for it, deluding yourself into thinking you have it, or, if you're getting my point, nodding slowly and getting ready to work for your respect.
 * Besides the hard work there is another quality that all the people who are respected must have: maturity. It doesn't really have to do with age, just how you act to other users. The reason is this: Even if you are making many good edits everyday, or always contributing to a project, if you are either rude to other users, try to do things that it's not your place to do or ask a staff member/project lead to give you status then people will almost certainly not respect you. By doing things it's not your place to do, I mean trying to tell a staff member or project lead what they should do. I don't mean that you can't suggest things, in fact, good suggestions often make you more respected; the problem comes when you say things in the wrong way. Like "demanding" something be done or complaining about a decision a staff member or project lead made. I can promise you that those types of things will never end well. For rudeness it's obvious, but if you ask someone to give you a status, that's basically just telling them that you think more highly of yourself than they do of you- because if they wanted to give it to you they would have already, wouldn't they? I'm going to repeat myself: Respect is something given to you by other people, not something you can judge yourself. So don't act like you have a higher position than you really do, and never try to assume you have enough respect for a certain position, because, although you might in some cases, usually if you even have to ask someone for status or recognition, not only does it mean that you don't have it, it also makes you look less mature and thus gives you less of a chance of getting it.
 * You know the great thing about Wikis? They give anyone who wants to a chance to contribute, and, therefore, become recognized for their hard work. But the real reason people do (or should) work on wikis isn't about the respect at all. It's about making the site better and more complete. This sounds very mean, but if you're here just so you can get some special status, then you may as well give up, because the reason I edit is for the satisfaction I get from knowing I'm making this a better resource for all Warriors fans. And I think that should be the reason you edit, too.
 * So, now that I'm basically done rambling, here it is again. If you want to be respected: 1) Don't expect respect. 2) Be polite and mature. 3) Work hard for the good of the wiki rather than for personal reasons. And always remember that respect is not judged yourself, but by the people around you. That's pretty much all I can say. ☛ ⓘⓝⓢⓐⓝⓔⓤⓛⓐⓡ ☚ 01:22, January 18, 2010 (UTC)