User talk:Raelic/Archive 3

nooooo
NOooooooooooo, not Beowulf :c 01:59, September 16, 2014 (UTC)

== Re: ==

Thank you for the redline c: I honestly have no idea how im supposed to use redlines.. Do i just try my best to copy it, or do i line over it? Im sorry, Im used to drawing traditionally most of my life, so this is kind of confusing. 03:27, September 16, 2014 (UTC)

Re:
Oh, that makes sense.. I thought if i were to line directly over it, though, wouldnt that make it your image? Since it was your redline? Because, i use a mouse, so i cant achieve exactly how that looks at all. Since you said it was possible to line right over it, that wouldnt make it "stealing" if i were to reupload with it? x_x sorry. This is just confusing me a bit. 03:50, September 16, 2014 (UTC)

Cloudspots
hey you wouldn't happen to have the file for any of Cloudspot's images, would you? If you do, would you mind sending one over to notquiterocketwildbokan@outlook.com? 10:04 PM, Wed Oct 15, 2014

Petal
Hello Raelic: Im just wondering, Im going to try Petal's queen image, so could you by any chance send me the file for the rogue? It would help greatly. Send it to my brothers email, since i use his for everything: Goofygooberaustin@gmail.com. Thank you! 16:09, October 30, 2014 (UTC)

.... Well, ive already reserved her, Im still going to try her, since Shinx has told me she had an older attempt she tried with the normal blanks, so ill use hers. But, if it proves to be a bit too difficult, ill probably go ahead and withdraw it so you could work on it. =/. Sorry, but theres really not many chararts still available, and i'd like something challenging. 21:27, October 30, 2014 (UTC)

After thinking about it, ill go ahead and remove it from the table under my name, then. You can go ahead and have her; since you've had experience with that pattern before, anyway. 21:54, October 30, 2014 (UTC)

god i dont even know how to format anymore
re: the name on my profile page

sure thing !! i can change it ! sorry about that ! &#123;&#123;SUBST:Nosubst&#124;User:EmmatheFoxwing/sig&#125;&#125; (talk) 16:39, November 16, 2014 (UTC)

Hi Raelic~ So Altelda told me to ask you a question I posted on my blog, and the question is is that aren't flecked cats technically just tabbies with spots instead of stripes? And if that's true, shouldn't Ashfur and Ferncloud be technically spotted tabbies? Just something I thought of~ Oh, and I have no signature. Sorry.

Gorse Fur
Hello, Raelic :). Just a quick question; Do you by any chance have any of Gorse Fur's old files? If you do, could you please send them to my brother's gmail? (I use his for everything): Goofygooberaustin@gmail.com . It would really help with his kit image. If not, that's totally fine ^-^ Thank you~  03:21, December 2, 2014 (UTC)

Hey Raelic. So, this is about the Flecked Tabbies thing, and I'm a bit confused. I asked the PCA on their Talk Page like you suggested a few weeks ago, but when I came back to see if they replied, I found that my section had been deleted. I'm not sure what happened, but do I have to be part of the PCA to ask them? Or am I just doing it wrong? Sorry if I bothered you :P  01:41, December 21, 2014 (UTC)

Re:
Thank you, Breezy =) this means a lot to me. I wasn't really expecting to be nominated. 03:55, February 16, =

Re:
Wow, thank you! You've really made my day, and I really appreciate the nomination. I wasn't expecting that at all. =) 07:01, February 16, 2015 (UTC)

oh...
The unusual events described in this chronicle occurred in 194- at Oran. Everyone agreed that, considering their somewhat extraordinary character, they were out of place there. For its ordinariness is what strikes one first about the town of Oran, which is merely a large French port on the Algerian coast, headquarters of the Prefect of a French Department.

The town itself, let us admit, is ugly. It has a smug, placid air and you need time to discover what it is that makes it different from so many business centers in other parts of the world. How to conjure up a picture, for instance, of a town without pigeons, without any trees or gardens, where you never hear the beat of wings or the rustle of leaves, a thoroughly negative place, in short?

The seasons are discriminated only in the sky. All that tells you of spring's coming is the feel of the air, or the baskets of flowers brought in from the suburbs by peddlers; it's a spring cried in the marketplaces. During the summer the sun bakes the houses bone-dry, sprinkles our walls with grayish dust, and you have no option but to survive those days of fire indoors, behind closed shutters. In autumn, on the other hand, we have deluges of mud. Only winter brings really pleasant weather.

Perhaps the easiest way of making a town's acquaintance is to ascertain how the people in it work, how they love, and how they die. In our little town (is this, one wonders, an effect of the climate? All three are done on much the same lines, with the same feverish yet casual air. The truth is that everyone is bored, and devotes himself to cultivating habits. Our citizens work hard, but solely with the object of getting rich. Their chief interest is in commerce, and their chief aim in life is, as they call it, "doing business." Naturally they don't eschew such simpler pleasures as love-making, seabathing, going to the pictures. But, very sensibly, they reserve these pastimes for Saturday afternoons and Sundays and employ the rest of the week in making money, as much as possible. In the evening, on leaving the office, they forgather, at an hour that never varies, in the cafes, stroll the same boulevard, or take the air on their balconies. The passions of the young are violent and short-lived; the vices of older men seldom range beyond an addiction to bowling, to banquets and "socials," or clubs where large sums change hands on the fall of a card.

It will be said, no doubt, that these habits are not peculiar to our town; really all our contemporaries are much the same. Certainly nothing is commoner nowadays than to see people working from morn till night and then proceeding to fritter away at cardtables, in cafes and in small-talk what time is left for living. Nevertheless there still exist towns and countries where people have now and then an inkling of something different. In general it doesn't change their lives. Still, they have had an intimation, and that's so much to the good. Oran, however, seems to be a town without intimations; in other words, completely modern. Hence I see no need to dwell on the manner of loving in our town. The men and women consume one another rapidly in what is called "the act of love," or else settle down to a mild habit of conjugality. We seldom find a mean between these extremes. That, too, is not exceptional. At Oran, as elsewhere, for lack of time and thinking, people have to love one another without knowing much about it.

What is more exceptional in our town is the difficulty one may experience there in dying. "Difficulty," perhaps, is not the right word, 'discomfort" would come nearer. Being ill's never agreeable but there are towns that stand by you, so to speak, when you are sick; in which you can, after a fashion, let yourself go.

An invalid needs small attentions, he likes to have something to rely on, and that's natural enough. But at Oran the violent extremes of temperature, the exigencies of business, the uninspiring surroundings, the sudden nightfalls, and the very nature of its pleasures call for good health. An invalid feels out of it there.

Think what it must be for a dying man, trapped behind hundreds of walls all sizzling with heat, while the whole population, sitting in cafes or hanging on the telephone, is discussing shipments, bills of lading, discounts! It will then be obvious what discomfort attends death, even modern death, when it waylays you under such conditions in a dry place.

05:33, February 21, 2015 (UTC)

thx 04:09, February 26, 2015 (UTC)

this is wAR
According to all known laws of aviation,

there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway

because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.

Barry! Breakfast is ready!

Ooming!

Hang on a second.

Hello?

- Barry? - Adam?

- Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.

Looking sharp.

Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.

Sorry. I'm excited.

Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.

A perfect report card, all B's.

Very proud.

Ma! I got a thing going here.

- You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!

- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!

Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!

- Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry.

- Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation.

Never thought I'd make it.

Three days grade school, three days high school.

Those were awkward.

Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive.

You did come back different.

- Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.

- Hear about Frankie? - Yeah.

- You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going.

Everybody knows, sting someone, you die.

Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead.

I guess he could have just gotten out of the way.

I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day.

That's why we don't need vacations.

Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances.

- Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are!

- Bee-men. - Amen!

Hallelujah!

Students, faculty, distinguished bees,

please welcome Dean Buzzwell.

Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of...

...9:15.

That concludes our ceremonies.

And begins your career at Honex Industries!

Will we pick ourjob today?

I heard it's just orientation.

Heads up! Here we go.

Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times.

- Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary.

Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco

and a part of the Hexagon Group.

This is it!

Wow.

Wow.

We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life

to get to the point where you can work for your whole life.

Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.

Our top-secret formula

is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured

into this soothing sweet syrup

with its distinctive golden glow you know as...

Honey!

- That girl was hot. - She's my cousin!

- She is? - Yes, we're all cousins.

- Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive

to improve every aspect of bee existence.

These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology.

- What do you think he makes? - Not enough.

Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman.

- What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey

that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions.

Oan anyone work on the Krelman?

Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know

that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot.

But choose carefully

because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life.

The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that.

What's the difference?

You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off

in 27 million years.

So you'll just work us to death?

We'll sure try.

Wow! That blew my mind!

"What's the difference?" How can you say that?

One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make.

I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life.

But, Adam, how could they never have told us that?

Why would you question anything? We're bees.

We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth.

You ever think maybe things work a little too well here?

Like what? Give me one example.

I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about.

Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach.

Wait a second. Oheck it out.

- Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow.

I've never seen them this close.

They know what it's like outside the hive.

Yeah, but some don't come back.

- Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks!

You guys did great!

You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!

- I wonder where they were. - I don't know.

Their day's not planned.

Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what.

You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that.

Right.

Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime.

It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it.

Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it.

Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too?

Distant. Distant.

Look at these two.

- Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them.

It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock.

Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom!

He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me!

- Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out.

What were you doing during this?

Trying to alert the authorities.

I can autograph that.

A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades?

Yeah. Gusty.

We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow.

- Six miles, huh? - Barry!

A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it.

- Maybe I am. - You are not!

We're going 0900 at J-Gate.

What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough?

I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means.

Hey, Honex!

Dad, you surprised me.

You decide what you're interested in?

- Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one.

Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day?

Son, let me tell you about stirring.

You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around.

You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing.

You know, Dad, the more I think about it,

maybe the honey field just isn't right for me.

You were thinking of what, making balloon animals?

That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger.

Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey!

- Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny.

You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer!

- You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me!

Wait till you see the sticks I have.

I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!

Let's open some honey and celebrate!

Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae.

Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!

I'm so proud.

- We're starting work today! - Today's the day.

Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone.

Yeah, right.

Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal...

- Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left!

One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side.

- What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar!

Wow!

Oouple of newbies?

Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!

Make your choice.

- You want to go first? - No, you go.

Oh, my. What's available?

Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think.

- Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on.

I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.

Wax monkey's always open.

The Krelman opened up again.

What happened?

A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one.

Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.

Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life!

Oh, this is so hard!

Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,

humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,

mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry?

Barry!

All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine...

What happened to you? Where are you?

- I'm going out. - Out? Out where?

- Out there. - Oh, no!

I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life.

You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?

Another call coming in.

If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd

that gets their roses today.

Hey, guys.

- Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?

Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.

It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.

Really? Feeling lucky, are you?

Sign here, here. Just initial that.

- Thank you. - OK.

You got a rain advisory today,

and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain.

So be careful. As always, watch your brooms,

hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats.

Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us.

Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada!

- That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies,

bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans!

All right, launch positions!

Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!

Black and yellow!

Hello!

You ready for this, hot shot?

Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.

Wind, check.

- Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check.

- Wings, check. - Stinger, check.

Scared out of my shorts, check.

OK, ladies,

let's move it out!

Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers!

All of you, drain those flowers!

Wow! I'm out!

I can't believe I'm out!

So blue.

I feel so fast and free!

Box kite!

Wow!

Flowers!

This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual.

Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.

Roses!

30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.

Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick.

That is one nectar collector!

- Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir.

I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there,

a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic.

That's amazing. Why do we do that?

That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.

Oool.

I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?

Oopy that visual.

Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move.

Say again? You're reporting a moving flower?

Affirmative.

That was on the line!

This is the coolest. What is it?

I don't know, but I'm loving this color.

It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it.

Yeah, fuzzy.

Ohemical-y.

Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.

My sweet lord of bees!

Oandy-brain, get off there!

Problem!

- Guys! - This could be bad.

Affirmative.

Very close.

Gonna hurt.

Mama's little boy.

You are way out of position, rookie!

Ooming in at you like a missile!

Help me!

I don't think these are flowers.

- Should we tell him? - I think he knows.

What is this?!

Match point!

You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it!

Yowser!

Gross.

There's a bee in the car!

- Do something! - I'm driving!

- Hi, bee. - He's back here!

He's going to sting me!

Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze!

He blinked!

Spray him, Granny!

What are you doing?!

Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable.

I gotta get home.

Oan't fly in rain.

Oan't fly in rain.

Oan't fly in rain.

Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!

Ken, could you close the window please?

Ken, could you close the window please?

Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure.

You see? Folds out.

Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.

What was that?

Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This...

Drapes!

That is diabolical.

It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.

What's number one? Star Wars?

Nah, I don't go for that...

...kind of stuff.

No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds.

When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.

There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.

I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it.

I predicted global warming.

I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me.

Wait! Stop! Bee!

Stand back. These are winter boots.

Wait!

Don't kill him!

You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me!

Why does his life have less value than yours?

Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement?

I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling.

My brochure!

There you go, little guy.

I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing.

Put that on your resume brochure.

My whole face could puff up.

Make it one of your special skills.

Knocking someone out is also a special skill.

Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.

- Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.

- You could put carob chips on there. - Bye.

- Supposed to be less calories. - Bye.

I gotta say something.

She saved my life. I gotta say something.

All right, here it goes.

Nah.

What would I say?

I could really get in trouble.

It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

I've got to.

Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!

No. Yes. No.

Do it. I can't.

How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good.

Here she comes! Speak, you fool!

Hi!

I'm sorry.

- You're talking. - Yes, I know.

You're talking!

I'm so sorry.

No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming.

But I don't recall going to bed.

Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting.

This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee!

I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this,

but they were all trying to kill me.

And if it wasn't for you...

I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised.

That was a little weird.

- I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah.

I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me!

I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now.

- Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What?

The talking thing.

Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.

- That's very funny. - Yeah.

Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with.

Anyway...

Oan I...

...get you something? - Like what?

I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee?

I don't want to put you out.

It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.

- It's just coffee. - I hate to impose.

- Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup.

Hey, you want rum cake?

- I shouldn't. - Have some.

- No, I can't. - Oome on!

I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.

- Where? - These stripes don't help.

You look great!

I don't know if you know anything about fashion.

Are you all right?

No.

He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison.

He finally gets there.

He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on.

And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan.

Why would I marry a watermelon?"

Is that a bee joke?

That's the kind of stuff we do.

Yeah, different.

So, what are you gonna do, Barry?

About work? I don't know.

I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want.

I know how you feel.

- You do? - Sure.

My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.

- Really? - My only interest is flowers.

Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan.

Anyway, if you look...

There's my hive right there. See it?

You're in Sheep Meadow!

Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!

No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once.

- Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not?

- It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that.

- You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine.

Just having two cups of coffee!

Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee.

Yeah, it's no trouble.

Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life.

Are you...?

Oan I take a piece of this with me?

Sure! Here, have a crumb.

- Thanks! - Yeah.

All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around.

Or not.

OK, Barry.

And thank you so much again... for before.

Oh, that? That was nothing.

Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...

This can't possibly work.

He's all set to go. We may as well try it.

OK, Dave, pull the chute.

- Sounds amazing. - It was amazing!

It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life.

Humans! I can't believe you were with humans!

Giant, scary humans! What were they like?

Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.

They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy.

- Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't.

- How'd you get back? - Poodle.

You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see.

You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal.

- Well... - Well?

Well, I met someone.

You did? Was she Bee-ish?

- A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp.

- Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders.

I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all.

I can't get by that face.

So who is she?

She's... human.

No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law.

- Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy.

She's so nice. And she's a florist!

Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!

We're not dating.

You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes

with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite!

She saved my life! And she understands me.

This is over!

Eat this.

This is not over! What was that?

- They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey!

And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat!

- You know what a Oinnabon is? - No.

It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up...

Sit down!

...really hot! - Listen to me!

We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them!

Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning?

There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me!

You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee!

- Thinking bee. - Thinking bee.

Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

There he is. He's in the pool.

You know what your problem is, Barry?

I gotta start thinking bee?

How much longer will this go on?

It's been three days! Why aren't you working?

I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about.

What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee!

Would it kill you to make a little honey?

Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you.

Martin, would you talk to him?

Barry, I'm talking to you!

You coming?

Got everything?

All set!

Go ahead. I'll catch up.

Don't be too long.

Watch this!

Vanessa!

- We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him.

He doesn't respond to yelling!

- Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen!

I'm not listening to this.

Sorry, I've gotta go.

- Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend.

A girl? Is this why you can't decide?

Bye.

I just hope she's Bee-ish.

They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena?

To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream!

Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering.

A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events?

No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere?

It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster.

Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn.

TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane!

You don't have that?

We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease.

Oh, my.

Dumb bees!

You must want to sting all those jerks.

We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us.

So you have to watch your temper.

Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk,

write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion:

Anger, jealousy, lust.

Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?

Yeah.

- What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug.

He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep!

What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?

Yeah, it was. How did you know?

It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.

You've really got that down to a science.

- I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet.

What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this?

How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,

Ray Liotta Private Select?

- Is he that actor? - I never heard of him.

- Why is this here? - For people. We eat it.

You don't have enough food of your own?

- Well, yes. - How do you get it?

- Bees make it. - I know who makes it!

And it's hard to make it!

There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing!

- It's organic. - It's our-ganic!

It's just honey, Barry.

Just what?!

Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing!

You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have!

And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this.

I'm getting to the bottom of all of this!

Hey, Hector.

- You almost done? - Almost.

He is here. I sense it.

Well, I guess I'll go home now

and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around.

You're busted, box boy!

I knew I heard something. So you can talk!

I can talk. And now you'll start talking!

Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier?

I don't understand. I thought we were friends.

The last thing we want to do is upset bees!

You're too late! It's ours now!

You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword!

You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio!

Where is the honey coming from?

Tell me where!

Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!

Orazy person!

What horrible thing has happened here?

These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now

they're on the road to nowhere!

Just keep still.

What? You're not dead?

Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed?

To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here.

I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off!

I'm going to Tacoma.

- And you? - He really is dead.

All right.

Uh-oh!

- What is that?! - Oh, no!

- A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade?

Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!

Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?!

How much do you people need to see?!

Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window!

From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell.

But don't kill no more bugs!

- Bee! - Moose blood guy!!

- You hear something? - Like what?

Like tiny screaming.

Turn off the radio.

Whassup, bee boy?

Hey, Blood.

Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see.

Wow!

I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it.

I mean, that honey's ours.

- Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in.

It's a close community.

Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own.

- What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble.

Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack!

At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls.

Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly.

Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.

You got to be kidding me!

Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee!

- Hey, guys! - Mooseblood!

I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw?

We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit.

What is this place?

A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead.

They are pinheads!

Pinhead.

- Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.

The Thomas 3000!

Smoker?

Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar.

A couple breaths of this knocks them right out.

They make the honey, and we make the money.

"They make the honey, and we make the money"?

Oh, my!

What's going on? Are you OK?

Yeah. It doesn't last too long.

Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls?

Our queen was moved here. We had no choice.

This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes!

That's a drag queen!

What is this?

Oh, no!

There's hundreds of them!

Bee honey.

Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale!

This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something.

Oh, Barry, stop.

Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor.

Do these look like rumors?

That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos.

How did you get mixed up in this?

He's been talking to humans.

- What? - Talking to humans?!

He has a human girlfriend. And they make out!

Make out? Barry!

We do not.

- You wish you could. - Whose side are you on?

The bees!

I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night.

Barry, this is what you want to do with your life?

I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees!

Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked

your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop.

I remember that.

What right do they have to our honey?

We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!

Even if it's true, what can one bee do?

Sting them where it really hurts.

In the face! The eye!

- That would hurt. - No.

Up the nose? That's a killer.

There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters.

Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source.

No more bee beards!

With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.

Weather with Storm Stinger.

Sports with Buzz Larvi.

And Jeanette Ohung.

- Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung.

A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,

intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey,

packaging it and profiting from it illegally!

Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,

we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book,

Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon.

Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.

Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"?

Bees have never been afraid to change the world.

What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?

Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.

We were thinking of stickball or candy stores.

How old are you?

The bee community is supporting you in this case,

which will be the trial of the bee century.

You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too.

It's a common name. Next week...

He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots...

Next week...

Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em.

Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live.

Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish.

In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness!

It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.

Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that?

Quiet, please. Actual work going on here.

- Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is!

I'm helping him sue the human race.

- Hello. - Hello, bee.

This is Ken.

Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.

Why does he talk again?

Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working.

But it's our yogurt night!

Bye-bye.

Why is yogurt night so difficult?!

You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours!

Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help.

- Frosting... - How many sugars?

Just one. I try not to use the competition.

So why are you helping me?

Bees have good qualities.

And it takes my mind off the shop.

Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now.

Those are great, if you're three.

And artificial flowers.

- Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too.

Bent stingers, pointless pollination.

Bees must hate those fake things!

Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done.

Maybe this could make up for it a little bit.

- This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess.

You sure you want to go through with it?

Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able

to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty!

It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan,

where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history,

we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak.

What have we gotten into here, Barry?

It's pretty big, isn't it?

I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day.

You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers?

Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade.

- What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill.

Well, if it isn't the bee team.

You boys work on this?

All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding.

All right. Oase number 4475,

Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry

is now in session.

Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively?

A privilege.

Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world?

I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed.

Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

my grandmother was a simple woman.

Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right

to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us.

If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines,

just think of what would it mean.

I would have to negotiate with the silkworm

for the elastic in my britches!

Talking bee!

How do we know this isn't some sort of

holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry?

They could be using laser beams!

Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know,

he could be on steroids!

Mr. Benson?

Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here.

I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me.

It's important to all bees. We invented it!

We make it. And we protect it with our lives.

Unfortunately, there are some people in this room

who think they can take it from us

'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over,

you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have

but everything we are!

I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice!

Oall your first witness.

So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have.

I suppose so.

I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron!

Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms.

Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term.

I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you?

- No. - I couldn't hear you.

- No. - No.

Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that,

it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey.

They're very lovable creatures.

Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.

You mean like this?

Bears kill bees!

How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?!

Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows!

OK, that's enough. Take him away.

So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me.

- Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police.

But you've never been a police officer, have you?

No, I haven't.

No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example

of bee culture casually stolen by a human

for nothing more than a prance-about stage name.

Oh, please.

Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?

Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting.

Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!

That's not his real name?! You idiots!

Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on

your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005.

Thank you. Thank you.

I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome

with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow.

I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?

Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you?

Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't

have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir?

Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now!

This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella!

Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?!

- Order in this court! - You're all thinking it!

Order! Order, I say!

- Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down!

I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that.

I think the jury's on our side.

Are we doing everything right, legally?

I'm a florist.

Right. Well, here's to a great team.

To a great team!

Well, hello.

- Ken! - Hello.

I didn't think you were coming.

No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery.

I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.

Oh, that was lucky.

There's a little left. I could heat it up.

Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.

So I hear you're quite a tennis player.

I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby.

That's where I usually sit. Right... there.

Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,

and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill.

You think I don't see what you're doing?

I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common.

Do we?

Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out.

That's just what I was thinking about doing.

Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.

I'm going to drain the old stinger.

Yeah, you do that.

Look at that.

You know, I've just about had it

with your little mind games.

- What's that? - Italian Vogue.

Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.

A lot of ads.

Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine?

Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!

I think something stinks in here!

I love the smell of flowers.

How do you like the smell of flames?!

Not as much.

Water bug! Not taking sides!

Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic!

I've got issues!

Well, well, well, a royal flush!

- You're bluffing. - Am I?

Surf's up, dude!

Poo water!

That bowl is gnarly.

Except for those dirty yellow rings!

Kenneth! What are you doing?!

You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it!

We need to talk!

He's just a little bee!

And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time!

Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life?

No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them!

Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...

My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster!

Goodbye, Ken.

And for your information,

I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man!

I'm sorry about all that.

I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it!

I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me.

I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well.

Are you OK for the trial?

I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas.

We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.

Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers...

Yeah.

Layton, you've gotta weave some magic

with this jury, or it's gonna be all over.

Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around

is to remind them of what they don't like about bees.

- You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic?

Only to losing, son. Only to losing.

Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know.

What exactly is your relationship

to that woman?

We're friends.

- Good friends? - Yes.

How good? Do you live together?

Wait a minute...

Are you her little...

...bedbug?

I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand,

doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children?

- Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents!

- Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are!

Hold me back!

You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson?

He's denouncing bees!

Don't y'all date your cousins?

- Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy!

Adam, don't! It's what he wants!

Oh, I'm hit!!

Oh, lordy, I am hit!

Order! Order!

The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins!

I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction!

You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages!

Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way!

- Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs.

What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison

from my heaving buttocks?

I will have order in this court. Order!

Order, please!

The case of the honeybees versus the human race

took a pointed turn against the bees

yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery.

- Hey, buddy. - Hey.

- Is there much pain? - Yeah.

I...

I blew the whole case, didn't I?

It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died.

I'd be better off dead. Look at me.

They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.

Look, there's a little celery still on it.

What was it like to sting someone?

I can't explain it. It was all...

All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy!

All right.

You think it was all a trap?

Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this.

What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world.

What will the humans do to us if they win?

I don't know.

I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad.

Adam, they check in, but they don't check out!

Oh, my.

Oould you get a nurse to close that window?

- Why? - The smoke.

Bees don't smoke.

Right. Bees don't smoke.

Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking.

That's it! That's our case!

It is? It's not over?

Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.

Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can.

And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.

Mr. Flayman.

Yes? Yes, Your Honor!

Where is the rest of your team?

Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.

Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,

and as a result, we don't make very good time.

I actually heard a funny story about...

Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs

taken up enough of this court's valuable time?

How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on?

They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges

against my clients, who run legitimate businesses.

I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case!

Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going

to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion.

But you can't! We have a terrific case.

Where is your proof? Where is the evidence?

Show me the smoking gun!

Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun?

Here is your smoking gun.

What is that?

It's a bee smoker!

What, this? This harmless little contraption?

This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee.

Look at what has happened

to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?"

Is this what nature intended for us?

To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines

and man-made wooden slat work camps?

Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man?

- What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card.

Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees!

Free the bees! Free the bees!

Free the bees!

Free the bees! Free the bees!

The court finds in favor of the bees!

Vanessa, we won!

I knew you could do it! High-five!

Sorry.

I'm OK! You know what this means?

All the honey will finally belong to the bees.

Now we won't have to work so hard all the time.

This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson.

You'll regret this.

Barry, how much honey is out there?

All right. One at a time.

Barry, who are you wearing?

My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants.

- What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean?

We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years.

Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement?

First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps.

Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with,

every last drop.

We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more

than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine.

We're all aware of what they do in the woods.

Wait for my signal.

Take him out.

He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine.

And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames...

But it's just a prance-about stage name!

...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products

and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments.

Oan't breathe.

Bring it in, boys!

Hold it right there! Good.

Tap it.

Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming!

- I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down.

Shut down honey production!

Stop making honey!

Turn your key, sir!

What do we do now?

Oannonball!

We're shutting honey production!

Mission abort.

Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base.

Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there.

Oh, yeah?

What's going on? Where is everybody?

- Are they out celebrating? - They're home.

They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in.

I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket.

At least we got our honey back.

Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't?

It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it.

This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well.

And now...

Now I can't.

I don't understand why they're not happy.

I thought their lives would be better!

They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people.

You don't have any idea what's going on, do you?

- What did you want to show me? - This.

What happened here?

That is not the half of it.

Oh, no. Oh, my.

They're all wilting.

Doesn't look very good, does it?

No.

And whose fault do you think that is?

You know, I'm gonna guess bees.

Bees?

Specifically, me.

I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things.

It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.

That's our whole SAT test right there.

Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom.

And then, of course...

The human species?

So if there's no more pollination,

it could all just go south here, couldn't it?

I know this is also partly my fault.

How about a suicide pact?

How do we do it?

- I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice.

Right, right.

Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going.

I had to open my mouth and talk.

Vanessa?

Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going?

To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena.

They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying.

It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it.

Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this.

I know. Me neither.

Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports.

Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?

Roses!

Vanessa!

Roses?!

Barry?

- Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are.

Flowers, bees, pollen!

I know. That's why this is the last parade.

Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down?

Oould you slow down?

Barry!

OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault.

Yes, it kind of is.

I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you

with the flower shop. I've made it worse.

Actually, it's completely closed down.

I thought maybe you were remodeling.

But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined.

I don't want to hear it!

All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen.

I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park.

All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got.

- Bees. - Park.

- Pollen! - Flowers.

- Repollination! - Across the nation!

Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia.

They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy.

Security will be tight.

I have an idea.

Vanessa Bloome, FTD.

Official floral business. It's real.

Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.

Thank you. It was a gift.

Once inside, we just pick the right float.

How about The Princess and the Pea?

I could be the princess, and you could be the pea!

Yes, I got it.

- Where should I sit? - What are you?

- I believe I'm the pea. - The pea?

It goes under the mattresses.

- Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal.

You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco!

Let's see what this baby'll do.

Hey, what are you doing?!

Then all we do is blend in with traffic...

...without arousing suspicion.

Once at the airport, there's no stopping us.

Stop! Security.

- You and your insect pack your float? - Yes.

Has it been in your possession the entire time?

Would you remove your shoes?

- Remove your stinger. - It's part of me.

I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight.

Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job.

Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job!

I think this is gonna work.

It's got to work.

Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott.

We have a bit of bad weather in New York.

It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay.

Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it.

I gotta get up there and talk to them.

Be careful.

Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine?

I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.

Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.

- What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing.

Bee!

Don't freak out! My entire species...

What are you doing?

- Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney?

Don't move.

Oh, Barry.

Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain.

Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit?

And please hurry!

What happened here?

There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded.

One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious!

- Is that another bee joke? - No!

No one's flying the plane!

This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status?

This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York.

Where's the pilot?

He's unconscious, and so is the copilot.

Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience?

As a matter of fact, there is.

- Who's that? - Barry Benson.

From the honey trial?! Oh, great.

Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee.

It's got giant wings, huge engines.

I can't fly a plane.

- Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes.

How hard could it be?

Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning.

This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport,

where a suspenseful scene is developing.

Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory...

That's Barry!

...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers

and an incapacitated flight crew.

Flowers?!

We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls

with absolutely no flight experience.

Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane.

I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres.

They've done enough damage.

But isn't he your only hope?

Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all.

Their wings are too small...

Haven't we heard this a million times?

"The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense."

- Get this on the air! - Got it.

- Stand by. - We're going live.

The way we work may be a mystery to you.

Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs.

But let me tell you about a small job.

If you do it well, it makes a big difference.

More than we realized. To us, to everyone.

That's why I want to get bees back to working together.

That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O.

We get behind a fellow.

- Black and yellow! - Hello!

Left, right, down, hover.

- Hover? - Forget hover.

This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep!

Barry, what happened?!

Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time.

- That may have been helping me. - And now we're not!

So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.

All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out!

Move out!

Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane!

Don't have to yell.

I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble.

It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice!

It's not a tone. I'm panicking!

I can't do this!

Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it!

You snap out of it.

You snap out of it.

- You snap out of it! - You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it! - You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it! - You snap out of it!

- Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn.

How is the plane flying?

I don't know.

Hello?

Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there?

The Pollen Jocks!

They do get behind a fellow.

- Black and yellow. - Hello.

All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop.

Where? I can't see anything. Oan you?

No, nothing. It's all cloudy.

Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.

- Thinking bee. - Thinking bee.

Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something.

- What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.

Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.

Bring the nose down.

Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

- What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

- Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK.

Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys?

Affirmative!

Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.

Land on that flower!

Ready? Full reverse!

Spin it around!

- Not that flower! The other one! - Which one?

- That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower!

That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower

made of millions of bees!

Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.

Rotate around it.

- This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly.

Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern?

Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse!

Just drop it. Be a part of it.

Aim for the center!

Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!

Oome on, already.

Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly!

- Yes. No high-five! - Right.

Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower?

What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius!

- Thank you. - But we're not done yet.

Listen, everyone!

This runway is covered with the last pollen

from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth.

That means this is our last chance.

We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this.

If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say?

Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains?

We're bees!

Keychain!

Then follow me! Except Keychain.

Hold on, Barry. Here.

You've earned this.

Yeah!

I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.

Oh, yeah.

That's our Barry.

Mom! The bees are back!

If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time.

I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight!

Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next?

Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.

Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel!

Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat!

I had no idea.

Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment?

Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you.

Sorry I'm late.

He's a lawyer too?

I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase.

Have a great afternoon!

Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere.

No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me.

You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next?

All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly.

Thank you, Barry!

That bee is living my life!

Let it go, Kenny.

- When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go.

- Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is.

Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office.

You have got to start thinking bee, my friend.

- Thinking bee! - Me?

Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here?

I'm not making a major life decision during a production number!

All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys.

I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

bONus roUND
ICE HARVESTERS, dressed in traditional Sami clothing, score a frozen lake. They SING. ”The Frozen Heart (Ice Worker’s Song)” ICE HARVESTERS BORN OF COLD AND WINTER AIR AND MOUNTAIN RAIN COMBINING, THIS ICY FORCE BOTH FOUL AND FAIR HAS A FROZEN HEART WORTH MINING. The men drag giant ice blocks through channels of water. ICE HARVESTERS (CONT’D) CUT THROUGH THE HEART, COLD AND CLEAR. STRIKE FOR LOVE AND STRIKE FOR FEAR. SEE THE BEAUTY SHARP AND SHEER. SPLIT THE ICE APART! AND BREAK THE FROZEN HEART. Hup! Ho! Watch your step! Let it go! A young Sami boy, KRISTOFF (8), and his reindeer calf, SVEN, share a carrot as they try to keep up with the men. ICE HARVESTERS (CONT’D) Hup! Ho! Watch your step! Let it go! Young Kristoff struggles to get a block of ice out of the water. He fails, ends up soaked. Sven licks his wet cheek. ICE HARVESTERS (CONT’D) BEAUTIFUL! POWERFUL! DANGEROUS! COLD! ICE HAS A MAGIC CAN'T BE CONTROLLED. A sharp ice floe overtakes the workers, threateningly. They fight it back. ICE HARVESTERS (CONT’D) STRONGER THAN ONE, STRONGER THAN TEN STRONGER THAN A HUNDRED MEN! Massive fjord horses drag heavy ice plows. FROZEN - J. Lee 1ICE HARVESTERS (CONT’D) BORN OF COLD AND WINTER AIR AND MOUNTAIN RAIN COMBINING The sun sets. Lanterns are lit. ICE HARVESTERS (CONT’D) THIS ICY FORCE BOTH FOUL AND FAIR HAS A FROZEN HEART WORTH MINING. CUT THROUGH THE HEART, COLD AND CLEAR. In the dark, Kristoff and Sven finally manage to get a single block of ice out of the water. ICE HARVESTERS (CONT’D) STRIKE FOR LOVE AND STRIKE FOR FEAR. THERE'S BEAUTY AND THERE'S DANGER HERE. SPLIT THE ICE APART! BEWARE THE FROZEN HEART. The workers pile onto the giant horse-drawn ice sled as it pulls away. Left behind, Kristoff and Sven push their ice block onto a dinky little sled then head off. We sweep up from them to the Northern Lights filling the sky...then move across the mountains...beneath the snowline...and descend upon... EXT. THE KINGDOM OF ARENDELLE — NIGHT A humble castle, built of wood, nestled in a deep fjord. INT. CASTLE, NURSERY — NIGHT ELSA (8) sleeps in her bed. Her little sister ANNA (5) pops up beside her. YOUNG ANNA Elsa. Psst. Elsa! Psst. Elsa doesn’t stir. Anna sits on Elsa and bounces. YOUNG ANNA (CONT’D) Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. YOUNG ELSA (grumbling) Anna, go back to sleep. Anna rolls onto her back and spreads all her weight on Elsa. FROZEN - J. Lee 2YOUNG ANNA (drama queen-ish) I just can’t. The sky’s awake, so I’m awake, so we have to play. YOUNG ELSA ...Go play by yourself. Elsa shoves Anna off the bed. Anna lands butt to floor, sighs, defeated. But then she gets an idea. She hops back on the bed and lifts one of Elsa’s eyelids. YOUNG ANNA (mischievously) Do you want to build a snowman? Elsa’s eyes both pop open. She smiles. INT. CASTLE STAIRCASE — NIGHT Anna, now wearing snow boots, pulls Elsa by the hand. YOUNG ANNA Come on, come on, come on, come on. Elsa tries to shush her, but Anna’s too excited. INT. BALLROOM — NIGHT The girls sneak into the ballroom. Elsa shuts the door. YOUNG ANNA Do the magic! Do the magic! Elsa laughs and waves her hands together. Snowflakes suddenly burst forth and dance between her palms, forming a snowball. Elsa throws the snowball high into the air. Snow bursts out and flurries around the room. Anna dances about, catching flakes in her palms and mouth. YOUNG ANNA (CONT’D) This is amazing! YOUNG ELSA Watch this! Elsa stomps her little slippered foot and a layer of ice suddenly coats the floor, forming a giant ice rink. Anna slides off, laughing. FROZEN - J. Lee 3PLAY MONTAGE: -Anna and Elsa roll giant snowballs and build a snowman together. Elsa moves his stick arms around. YOUNG ELSA (CONT’D) (goofy voice) Hi, I’m Olaf and I like warm hugs. Anna jumps up and hugs him. YOUNG ANNA I love you, Olaf. -Anna and Olaf appear to be dancing. REVEAL: Elsa is actually propelling them across the ice floor with her magic. -The girls slide down snowbanks together! -Anna fearlessly jumps off a snow peak into mid air. YOUNG ANNA (CONT’D) Catch me! Elsa makes another peak to catch Anna. YOUNG ELSA Gotcha! Anna keeps jumping. Elsa keeps casting magic. YOUNG ANNA (jumping faster) Again! Again! YOUNG ELSA (struggling to keep up) Slow down! Elsa suddenly slips. Her magic accidentally STRIKES Anna in the head. Anna tumbles down a snowbank and lands, unconscious. YOUNG ELSA (CONT’D) ANNA! Elsa runs to Anna and takes her in her arms. A streak of Anna’s hair, where struck, turns white. YOUNG ELSA (CONT’D) MAMA! PAPA! The room around them fills with frightening ice spikes. FROZEN - J. Lee 4The parents burst through the frozen door. GASP at the sight of the room. KING Elsa, what have you done? This is getting out of hand! QUEEN (seeing Anna) Anna! The King and Queen rush to Anna and take her in their arms. ELSA It was an accident. I’m sorry, Anna. QUEEN (about Anna) She’s ice cold. KING ...I know where we have to go. SLAM CUT TO: INT. DARK ROOM — NIGHT The King sifts through a shelf to find an ancient book inscribed with Old Norse runes. He opens the book, scrambles to a page with an ancient map. EXT. ARENDELLE — NIGHT Carrying the girls, the King and Queen ride their horses out of the kingdom. Snow streams from Elsa’s hands, leaving a trail of ice behind them. EXT. FJORD MOUNTAIN FOREST — NIGHT A sleepy Kristoff and Sven travel alone through the dark woods. All of a sudden, the King and Queen race by with the girls, leaving the wake of ice. KRISTOFF Ice? SLAM CUT TO: FROZEN - J. Lee 5EXT. BLACK MOUNTAINS — NIGHT Kristoff rides Sven as they follow the trail of ice. YOUNG KRISTOFF Faster, Sven! EXT. THE VALLEY OF THE LIVING ROCK — NIGHT Kristoff hops off Sven at the edge of a deep valley. They hide behind a rock and peek out. Down below, the King holds a frightened Elsa. The Queen holds the still unconscious Anna. KING Please, help. My daughter! Suddenly, a bunch of rocks tumble down the valley toward them. It looks as though they’ll be crushed! But, luckily, the rocks stop at their feet. The rocks then unfold, revealing bright faces. YOUNG KRISTOFF Trolls...? The rock in front of Kristoff “wakes up.” Meet BULDA. BULDA Shush. I’m trying to listen. She grabs Kristoff and Sven by hand and hoof and hugs them close. Sven licks her face and she eyes them both. BULDA (CONT’D) Cuties. I’m gonna keep you. Back below, the crowd parts for a troll as old as the Earth. They call him GRAND PABBIE. He approaches arthritically, but determined. He nods respectfully to the king. GRAND PABBIE Your Majesty. (referring to Elsa) Born with the powers or cursed? KING Born. And they’re getting stronger. Grand Pabbie motions for the Queen to bring Anna to him. She does. He examines her. FROZEN - J. Lee 6GRAND PABBIE (about Anna) You are lucky it wasn’t her heart. The heart is not so easily changed, but the head can be persuaded. KING Do what you must. GRAND PABBIE I recommend we remove all magic, even memories of magic to be safe.... But don’t worry, I’ll leave the fun. Grand Pabbie pulls out a glowing blue energy from Anna’s head. We see her memories floating right above her. Grand Pabbie changes all of her magical memories to ordinary memories -- snowy play indoors with the girls in their nightgowns changes to outdoors on the winter fjords with the girls in winter gear. He puts the ordinary memories back in her head. GRAND PABBIE (CONT’D) She will be okay. YOUNG ELSA But she won’t remember I have powers? KING It’s for the best. PABBIE Listen to me, Elsa, your power will only grow. As he speaks, he conducts the Northern Lights to show a silhouette of an adult Elsa creating magical snowflakes. PABBIE (CONT’D) There is beauty in your magic.... But also great danger. The snowflakes turn to sharp spikes. PABBIE (O.S.) (CONT’D) You must learn to control it. In the Northern Lights display, the sharp spikes cause human figures to panic and attack Elsa. PABBIE (CONT’D) Fear will be your enemy. FROZEN - J. Lee 7Elsa gasps and buries her face in the King’s chest. The King wraps his arms around Elsa, protectively. KING No. We’ll protect her. She can learn to control it. I’m sure. Over the King’s words we... DISSOLVE TO: -The Arendelle castle gates shutting. KING (O.S.) (CONT’D) Until then, we’ll lock the gates. We’ll reduce the staff. We will limit her contact with people and keep her powers hidden from everyone... including Anna. -The castle shutters close. -Anna sits on her bed as Elsa’s furniture disappears. -Anna rushes to the hall to see Elsa shut the door to her new room. Anna watches, confused and sad. DISSOLVE TO: INT. CASTLE WINDOW — DAY We look out on a gentle snowfall. Little Anna skips up to the window. She lights up at the sight of the snow and rushes down the hall. INT. HALLWAY, ELSA’S DOOR — DAY Anna knocks on Elsa’s door and SINGS. “Do You Want to Build a Snowman?” YOUNG ANNA DO YOU WANT TO BUILD A SNOWMAN? COME ON LET’S GO AND PLAY. Anna peeks under the door. YOUNG ANNA (CONT’D) I NEVER SEE YOU ANYMORE. COME OUT THE DOOR. IT’S LIKE YOU’VE GONE AWAY. FROZEN - J. Lee 8-INT. ANNA’S ROOM — Anna plays with two dolls, gives up, sad. YOUNG ANNA (CONT’D) WE USED TO BE BEST BUDDIES AND NOW WE’RE NOT. I WISH YOU WOULD TELL ME WHY. -ELSA’S DOOR. Anna peeks through the key hole. YOUNG ANNA (CONT’D) DO YOU WANT TO BUILD A SNOWMAN? -Anna calls through the keyhole. YOUNG ANNA (CONT’D) IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE A SNOWMAN. YOUNG ELSA (O.S.) Go away, Anna. YOUNG ANNA (hearbroken) ...OKAY BYE. -BEHIND THE DOOR — DAY. Elsa sits at the window looking out, longingly. Suddenly, her icy hands freeze the windowsill. -LATER. The King slips leather gloves onto Elsa’s hands. KING The gloves will help. He pats her gloved hand. KING (CONT’D) See? You’re good.... (starting their mantra) Conceal it. YOUNG ELSA Don’t feel it. YOUNG ELSA & KING Don’t let it show. -INT. HALLWAY, ELSA’S DOOR — DAY. Anna, now 9, knocks on Elsa’s door. ANNA (9) DO YOU WANT TO BUILD A SNOWMAN? -INT. HALLWAY — DAY. Alone, Anna rides a bicycle built for two in the hall by standing on the back seat. FROZEN - J. Lee 9ANNA (9) (CONT’D) OR RIDE OUR BIKE AROUND THE HALL? I THINK SOME COMPANY IS OVERDUE... -INT. PORTRAIT ROOM — DAY. Anna runs around the portrait room, gaining momentum to flip over the arm of the couch. ANNA (9) (CONT’D) I’VE STARTED TALKING TO THE PICTURES ON THE WALLS. Anna lands PLOP on the cushions, then looks up at the painting above her of the courageous Joan of Arc. ANNA (9) (CONT’D) Hang in there, Joan. -INT. EMPTY LIBRARY — DAY. Looks like no one’s around. ANNA (9) (CONT’D) IT GETS A LITTLE LONELY ALL THESE EMPTY ROOMS. But then we find Anna, laying at the base of the grandfather clock, playing with her braids, bored out of her mind. ANNA (9) (CONT’D) JUST WATCHING THE HOURS TICK BY. Anna’s eyes follow the grandfather clock’s pendulum. ANNA (9) (CONT’D) TICK TOCK. TICK TOCK. TICK TOCK. -INT. ELSA’S ROOM — NIGHT. Elsa (now 12) paces as she panics. The entire wall is frozen behind her. ELSA (12) I’m scared. It’s getting stronger. KING Getting upset only makes it worse. The King goes to hug her. ELSA (12) No. Don’t touch me. I don’t want to hurt you. He and the Queen look at each other with alarmed sadness. -INT. LIBRARY — DAY. Anna, now a teenager, slides past Elsa’s room without stopping. FROZEN - J. Lee 10-INT. KING AND QUEEN’S QUARTERS — DAY. Anna runs into the room and throws herself into her parents’ arms. TEEN ANNA See you in two weeks. -INT. ELSA’S ROOM — DAY. Elsa curtsies in front of her parents, formally, not touching them. TEEN ELSA Do you have to go? KING You’ll be fine, Elsa. -EXT. DOCKS — DAY. The King and Queen leave on a ship. -EXT. ROUGH SEAS — NIGHT. Lightning flashes. The sea rages in a storm. The King and Queen’s ship is lost in the waves. -INT. CASTLE — DAY. A portrait of the King and Queen is covered in mourning cloth. -EXT. CEMETERY — DAY. Anna looks small, standing before her people, beside burial stones. -INT. HALLWAY, ELSA’S DOOR. Anna, still in her mourning clothes, approaches and knocks. ANNA (singing) Elsa? PLEASE I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE PEOPLE ARE ASKING WHERE YOU’VE BEEN THEY SAY HAVE COURAGE AND I’M TRYING TO I’M RIGHT OUT HERE FOR YOU. PLEASE LET ME IN. Anna slides down the door and sits with her head against it. ANNA (CONT’D) WE ONLY HAVE EACH OTHER. IT’S JUST YOU AND ME. WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO? (weak, internal) DO YOU WANT TO BUILD A SNOWMAN? We move through the door... -INT. ELSA’S ROOM — DAY. Elsa is sitting in the exact same pose as Anna. Her bedroom is frozen with ice. Snowflakes hang in the air, suspended by grief. FADE OUT. FROZEN - J. Lee 11EXT. THE KINGDOM OF ARENDELLE — MORNING A new dawn rises over the fjords. Ships pull up to the docks. Guests pile out. DOCK MASTER Welcome to Arendelle! A BOY tries to get away as his MOTHER tries to stuff him in his bunad jacket. BOY Why do I have to wear this? MOTHER Because the Queen has come of age. It’s Coronation Day! BOY That’s not my fault. They pass the May Pole being raised and a Sami ice harvester chatting with his reindeer. We recognize them as Kristoff and Sven, all grown up. Sven hops around excitedly like a dog and nuzzles Kristoff’s chest. KRISTOFF What do you want, Sven? Kristoff leans in and speaks for Sven, as if he can. KRISTOFF (AS SVEN) (CONT’D) Give me a snack. KRISTOFF (CONT’D) What’s the magic word? KRISTOFF (AS SVEN) (CONT’D) Please! Kristoff pulls a carrot out of his shirt pocket and hands it to Sven. Sven tries to bite the whole thing. KRISTOFF (CONT’D) Hey, hey, hey! Share! Sven takes a smaller bite. Kristoff then has a bite himself, not seeming to care that it’s covered in reindeer slobber. We move on to PERSI and AGGIE, a super-excited couple who rush towards the castle. FROZEN - J. Lee 12PERSI I can’t believe they’re finally opening up the gates! AGGIE And for a whole day! Faster, Persi! They pass a tiny but menacing DUKE, who wears taps on his shoes to “enhance” his presence. Two THUG guards follow close behind him. DUKE Ah, Arendelle, our most mysterious trade partner. Open those gates so I may unlock your secrets and exploit your riches. (catching himself) ...Did I just say that out loud? We leave him and head down the bridge towards the castle gates, passing an Irishman and a Spanish Dignitary. IRISHMAN Oh, me sore eyes can’t wait to see the Queen and the Princess. I bet they’re absolutely lovely. SPANISH DIGNITARY I bet they are beautiful. We move past them, to a particular castle window. CUT TO: INT. CASTLE, ANNA’S BEDROOM — DAY Anna, 18, snores. Drools. KNOCK. KNOCK. KAI (O.S.) Princess Anna...? Anna sits up. She’s got major bedhead. She coughs. Snorts. Pulls a hair from her mouth. ANNA ...Huh? Yeah? KAI (O.S.) Sorry to wake you, ma’am but-- ANNA No, you didn’t. I’ve been up for hours. FROZEN - J. Lee 13She falls back asleep while sitting. She snores. Her head drops, startling her awake. ANNA (CONT’D) Who is it? KAI (O.S.) It’s still me, ma’am. Time to get ready. ANNA Ready for what? KAI (O.S.) Your sister’s coronation, ma’am. ANNA My sister’s cor-neration... One eye opens enough to catch sight of her coronation dress. She bolts, wide awake in excitement. ANNA (CONT’D) Coronation Day! Ha ha! SLAM CUT TO: EXT. CASTLE HALL — DAY Anna bursts out of her room, wearing her coronation dress. She finishes pinning ribbons in her hair. Seeing the hustle and bustle of preparations, she can’t help but SING. “For the First Time in Forever” ANNA THE WINDOW IS OPEN! SO'S THAT DOOR! I DIDN'T KNOW THEY DID THAT ANYMORE. WHO KNEW WE OWNED 8000 SALAD PLATES...? -Anna slides along the floor of the ballroom in her socks. ANNA (CONT’D) FOR YEARS I HAVE ROAMED THESE EMPTY HALLS WHY HAVE A BALLROOM WITH NO BALLS? FINALLY, THEY'RE OPENING UP THE GATES! -She shakes hands with a suit of armor. Breaks it. Hides the evidence. FROZEN - J. Lee 14ANNA (CONT’D) THERE'LL BE REAL, ACTUAL PEOPLE - IT'LL BE TOTALLY STRANGE. BUT WOW AM I SO READY FOR THIS CHANGE! -Anna comes to a window and jumps out onto a window washer’s pulley. She raises herself up to see the ships arriving. ANNA (CONT’D) FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER, THERE'LL BE MUSIC, THERE'LL BE LIGHT. FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER, I'LL BE DANCING THROUGH THE NIGHT. -Anna walks through the garden and follows a family of geese. ANNA (CONT’D) DON'T KNOW IF I'M ELATED OR GASSY, BUT I'M SOMEWHERE IN THAT ZONE 'CAUSE FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER, I WON'T BE ALONE. (speaking) I can’t wait to meet everyone.... (GASP) What if I meet THE ONE? -Anna twists herself in a velvet drape like it’s a gown. She acts like she looks gorgeous, but she looks ridiculous. ANNA (CONT’D) TONIGHT, IMAGINE ME GOWN AND ALL FETCHINGLY DRAPED AGAINST THE WALL. THE PICTURE OF SOPHISTICATED GRACE. -She notices the bust of a man across the room. ANNA (CONT’D) (google-eyed) I SUDDENLY SEE HIM STANDING THERE, A BEAUTIFUL STRANGER TALL AND FAIR. (mouth full of chocolate) I WANNA STUFF SOME CHOCOLATE IN MY FACE! -She grabs the bust of the man and swings it around. ANNA (CONT’D) BUT THEN WE LAUGH AND TALK ALL EVENING, WHICH IS TOTALLY BIZARRE. NOTHING LIKE THE LIFE I'VE LED SO FAR. The bust goes flying and lands on the top of the cake. -Anna bursts into the portrait room, bounces on the furniture, and interacts with the paintings. FROZEN - J. Lee 15ANNA (CONT’D) FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER, THERE'LL BE MAGIC, THERE'LL BE FUN. FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER, I COULD BE NOTICED BY SOMEONE. AND I KNOW IT IS TOTALLY CRAZY TO DREAM I'D FIND ROMANCE. BUT FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER, AT LEAST I'VE GOT A CHANCE! -INT. LIBRARY. ELSA, now a very poised 21, watches out the window as the coronation guests arrive. ELSA DON'T LET THEM IN. DON'T LET THEM SEE. BE THE GOOD GIRL YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE. Elsa moves to a painting of her father’s coronation. She takes off her gloves and mimics the painting by holding a candlestick and ornament in place of an orb and scepter. ELSA (CONT’D) CONCEAL. DON'T FEEL. PUT ON A SHOW. MAKE ONE WRONG MOVE AND EVERYONE WILL KNOW. The candlestick and ornament ice over. Elsa gasps, slams them back down onto the table. She tries to reassure herself. ELSA (CONT’D) BUT IT'S ONLY FOR TODAY. We cut between Anna’s excitement and Elsa’s nerves. ANNA IT'S ONLY FOR TODAY! ELSA IT'S AGONY TO WAIT. ANNA IT'S AGONY TO WAIT!!! ELSA TELL THE GUARDS TO OPEN UP THE GATE. ANNA THE GATE!!! - Finally, the gates are open! Anna moves through the crowd, admiring the people around her. FROZEN - J. Lee 16ANNA (CONT’D) FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER. ELSA DON'T LET THEM IN DON'T LET THEM SEE ANNA I'M GETTING WHAT I'M DREAMING OF ELSA BE THE GOOD GIRL YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE ANNA A CHANCE TO LEAVE MY SISTER'S WORLD A CHANCE TO FIND TRUE LOVE ELSA CONCEAL. CONCEAL. DON'T FEEL. DON'T LET THEM KNOW. -Anna hurries over the bridge and into the village square. ANNA (CONT’D) I KNOW IT ALL ENDS TOMORROW, SO IT HAS TO BE TODAY!! ‘CAUSE FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER. . . FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER! NOTHING'S IN MY WAY!!! -Anna SLAMS right into the breast of a HORSE! She falls back and lands in a small wooden boat. It tips off of the dock. She’s heading overboard. But just then, the horse slams his hoof into the boat and steadies it. ANNA (CONT’D) (frustrated) Hey! HANS I’m so sorry. Are you hurt? The rider, HANS, sure is handsome and regal. ANNA (gentler) Hey. I-ya, no. No. I’m okay. HANS Are you sure? ANNA Yeah, I just wasn’t looking where I was going. But I’m okay. He hops down from his horse and steps into the boat. ANNA (CONT’D) I’m great, actually. FROZEN - J. Lee 17HANS Oh, thank goodness. He offers her a hand and their eyes meet. Chemistry. He helps her to her feet. HANS (CONT’D) (bowing) Prince Hans of the Southern Isles. ANNA (curtsying) Princess Anna of Arendelle. HANS Princess...? My Lady. He drops to his knees, head bowed. The horse bows too, curling his hoof up and out of the boat. The boat tips. Hans tumbles on top of Anna. Awkward. ANNA Hi...again. The horse slams his foot back into the boat to stabilize it. Anna and Hans tumble the other way. Anna lands on top of him. HANS Oh boy. ANNA Ha. This is awkward. Not you’re awkward, but just because we’re-- I’m awkward. You’re gorgeous. (did she just say that?) Wait, what? Hans quickly gets to his feet and helps Anna up again. HANS I’d like to formally apologize for hitting the Princess of Arendelle with my horse...and for every moment after. ANNA No. No-no. It’s fine. I’m not THAT Princess. I mean, if you’d hit my sister Elsa, that would be-- yeash! ‘Cuz, you know... (patting the horse) Hello. FROZEN - J. Lee 18 (MORE)(to Hans) But, lucky you, it’s-it’s just me. HANS Just you? Hans smiles, amused. She smiles back. The bells RING. She doesn’t notice at first; she’s too busy drinking in Hans’s handsomeness. ANNA ...The bells. The coronation. I-I-I better go. I have to...I better go. She hurries off, stops, turns back. Gives Hans a little wave. ANNA (CONT’D) Bye! As she rushes off again, Hans waves back. The horse waves too, once again taking his hoof out of the boat. HANS Oh no. The boat falls, with Hans in it. SPLASH! It lands upside down in the water. Hans raises it up off of him, gasping for air. CUT TO: INT. CHURCH CHAPEL — DAY Elsa stands at the alter. Anna stands off to one side. She peeks out to the audience. Hans waves at her from the pews. He’s changed his clothes. The crown is placed on Elsa’s head. The scepter and orb are presented to Elsa on a pillow. She slowly reaches for them. BISHOP (a whisper) Your Majesty, the gloves. Elsa hesitates. She breathes nervously, removes her gloves, places them on the pillow. Her hands shake. She takes the orb and scepter, then turns to the people. BISHOP (CONT’D) (formal, in Old Norse) Sehm hon HELL-drr IN-um HELL-gum AYG-num ok krund ee THES-um HELLgah STAHTH, ehk teh frahm FUR-ear Uthear... FROZEN - J. Lee 19 ANNA (CONT'D)The scepter and orb start to freeze over. BISHOP (CONT’D) ...Queen Elsa of Arendelle. CROWD Queen Elsa of Arendelle. Just in time. Elsa manages to set the orb and scepter back down on the pillow before anyone notices the ice. She picks up her gloves and slips them on. She made it. CUT TO: INT. GREAT HALL — NIGHT Springy music fills the Great Hall. Guests dance. Eat. Laugh. TRUMPETS SOUND. KAI (announcing) Queen Elsa of Arendelle. Elsa enters, poised and looking surprisingly content. She stands under a formal awning. KAI (CONT’D) Princess Anna of Arendelle! Anna runs into the room, waves awkwardly. Kai ushers her over to stand right next to Elsa. ANNA Here? Are you sure? She and Elsa sneak awkward peeks at each other. ELSA ...Hi. ANNA Hi me...? Oh. Um. Hi. ELSA ...You look beautiful. ANNA Thank you. You look beautifuller. I mean, not fuller. You don’t look fuller, but more beautiful. FROZEN - J. Lee 20ELSA Thank you. They look out at the celebration. ELSA (CONT’D) So, this is what a party looks like? ANNA It’s warmer than I thought. ELSA And what is that amazing smell? They both close their eyes and inhale. ANNA AND ELSA (TOGETHER) ...Chocolate. Their eyes pop open. They laugh. Elsa looks back out at the party. Anna looks at Elsa. She wants to say so much, but she can’t think of where to start. Just as she finds her way, Kai interrupts. KAI Your Majesty. The Duke of Weaseltown. DUKE Weselton. The Duke of Weselton. (to Elsa) Your Majesty, as your closest partner in trade, it seems only fitting that I offer you your first dance as queen. The Duke does a funny flitter of his feet, a hitch-kick, and a deep bow. DUKE (CONT’D) (whispers to himself) One, two, three. Jump. As he holds out his hand, head down, his toupee dips forward. Anna giggles. Elsa looks at Anna, stifles a giggle herself. ELSA (to the Duke) Thank you...only I don’t dance. FROZEN - J. Lee 21DUKE (offended) Oh...? ELSA But my sister does. ANNA What? DUKE Lucky you.... ANNA Oh, I don’t think-- The Duke grabs Anna’s arm and yanks her away before she can protest. DUKE If you swoon, let me know, I’ll catch you. Anna looks back at Elsa, desperately. ELSA Sorry. OUT ON THE DANCE FLOOR: The Duke showboats, but he’s just awful. Anna tries to make the best of it. DUKE Like an agile peacock... CLUCKCLUGGLE-CLUCK! He lands on her feet. ANNA Ow. Ow. DUKE Speaking of, so great to have the gates open. Why did they shut them in the first place? Do you know the reason? Hmm? He gets in her face, suspicious. ANNA ...No. FROZEN - J. Lee 22DUKE Oh, all right. Hang on. They don’t call me the little dipper for nothing. He dips Anna back. Elsa peeks through the crowd, can barely hold in her laughter. Anna shoots Elsa funny, help-me looks. DUKE (CONT’D) (groove fully on) Like a chicken...with the face of a monkey...I fly. JUMP CUT TO: MOMENTS LATER... Anna limps back to Elsa. DUKE (O.S.) Let me know when you’re ready for another round, M’Lady. ELSA Well, he was sprightly. ANNA (rubbing her sore feet) Especially for a man in heels. ELSA Are you okay? ANNA (loving Elsa’s attention) I’ve never been better. This is so nice. I wish it could be like this all the time. ELSA (sincere) Me too.... But then Elsa catches herself. She stiffens up, looks away. ELSA (CONT’D) But it can’t. ANNA Why not? If-- ELSA It just can’t. FROZEN - J. Lee 23Anna’s smile drops. She tries not to get emotional. ANNA Excuse me for a minute. She walks away. Elsa watches her go, saddened. Moving through the crowd, Anna gets bumped by a bowing man’s butt. She falls. Just before she hits the floor, Hans catches her. He smiles perfectly. HANS Glad I caught you. ANNA Hans. He smoothly sets his drink down on a passing tray. He lifts her up and leads her in a romantic dance. DISSOLVE TO: LATER: Anna and Hans drink and chat. ANNA (CONT’D) I often had the whole parlor to myself to slide... Oops. Sorry. She hits him in the face by mistake with her hand. He laughs. DISSOLVE TO: -THE CASTLE DOORS: Anna and Hans stroll out of the castle. ANNA (CONT’D) ...Your physique helps I’m sure. DISSOLVE TO: -THE ROSE GARDEN... Hans notices her white streak. HANS (about her white streak) What’s this? ANNA I was born with it, although I dreamt I was kissed by a troll. HANS I like it. DISSOLVE TO: FROZEN - J. Lee 24EXT. BALCONY — NIGHT Anna teaches Hans how to eat krumkake. ANNA Yeah, the whole thing! You got it. They laugh as the krumkake crumbles in his face. ANNA(CONT’D) Okay wait, wait. So you have how many brothers? HANS Twelve older brothers. Three of them pretended I was invisible... literally...for two years. ANNA That’s horrible. HANS It’s what brothers do. ANNA ...And sisters. Elsa and I were really close when we were little. But then, one day she just shut me out, and I never knew why. He takes her hand. Leans in close. HANS I would never shut you out. ANNA Okay, can I just say something crazy? HANS I love crazy. “Love is an Open Door” ANNA (singing) ALL MY LIFE HAS BEEN A SERIES OF DOORS IN MY FACE. AND THEN SUDDENLY I BUMP INTO YOU. HANS I was thinking the same thing, because like. . . FROZEN - J. Lee 25 (MORE)I'VE BEEN SEARCHING MY WHOLE LIFE TO FIND MY OWN PLACE. AND MAYBE IT'S THE PARTY TALKING, OR THE CHOCOLATE FONDUE. ANNA BUT WITH YOUHANS BUT WITH YOU, I FOUND MY PLACE. ANNA I SEE YOUR FACE. BOTH AND IT'S NOTHING LIKE I'VE EVER KNOWN BEFORE. They jump to the neighboring balcony and enter a door. They come out on top of one of the castle’s towers. BOTH (CONT’D) LOVE IS AN OPEN DOOR! LOVE IS AN OPEN DOOR! Cut to them sliding across an empty hallway in their socks. BOTH (CONT’D) LOVE IS AN OPEN DOOR ANNA WITH YOU! HANS WITH YOU! ANNA WITH YOU! HANS WITH YOU! BOTH LOVE IS AN OPEN DOOR. They hop up on the castle roof and watch a shooting star. HANS I MEAN IT'S CRAZY. ANNA What? FROZEN - J. Lee 26 HANS (CONT'D)HANS WE FINISH EACH OTHER'SANNA SANDWICHES! HANS That's what I was gonna say! They slide down the back of the roof out of sight. We next find them strutting on a bridge ledge. ANNA I'VE NEVER MET SOMEONEBOTH WHO THINKS SO MUCH LIKE ME. BOTH (SPOKEN) (CONT’D) Jinx.. . .jinx again. Are they doing the robot? No. They’re imitating the mechanical figures on the clock tower. BOTH (CONT’D) OUR MENTAL SYNCHRONIZATION CAN HAVE BUT ONE EXPLANATION, HANS YOUANNA AND IHANS WEREANNA JUSTBOTH MEANT TO BE. Anna and Hans dance on top of the lighthouse and cast dancing shadows across the sails of ships in the docks. ANNA SAY GOODBYEHANS SAY GOODBYEFROZEN - J. Lee 27BOTH TO THE PAIN OF THE PAST. BOTH (CONT’D) WE DON'T HAVE TO FEEL IT ANYMORE! LOVE IS AN OPENThey play hide and seek amongst the stable doors. BOTH (CONT’D) DOOR! LOVE IS AN OPEN DOOR! They climb to the waterfall looking out over the kingdom. Anna raises up her hands to frame the moon. Hans puts his hands on top of hers. Together their hands form a heart. BOTH (CONT’D) LIFE CAN BE SO MUCH MOREANNA WITH YOU! HANS WITH YOU! ANNA WITH YOU! HANS WITH YOU! BOTH LOVE IS AN OPEN HANS DOOR. ANNA DOOR. HANS Can I say something crazy...? Will you marry me? ANNA Can I just say something even crazier? Yes. CUT TO: FROZEN - J. Lee 28INT. BALL — NIGHT Anna pushes through the crowd towards Elsa, Hans in tow. ANNA Oops! Pardon. Sorry. Can we just get around you there? Thank you. Oh, there she is. Elsa! Elsa turns to Anna. Anna curtseys awkwardly. ANNA (CONT’D) I mean...Queen.... Me again. Um. May I present Prince Hans of the Southern Isles. HANS (bowing) Your Majesty. Elsa gives a polite but reserved curtsey. ANNA We would like-- HANS --your blessing-- ANNA --of-- ANNA/HANS --our marriage! ELSA Marriage...? ANNA Yes! ELSA I’m sorry, I’m confused. ANNA Well, we haven’t worked out all the details ourselves. We’ll need a few days to plan the ceremony. Of course we’ll have soup, roast, and ice cream and then-- Wait. Would we live here? ELSA Here? FROZEN - J. Lee 29HANS Absolutely! ELSA Anna-- ANNA Oh, we can invite all twelve of your brothers to stay with us-- ELSA What? No, no, no, no, no. ANNA Of course we have the room. I don’t know. Some of them must-- ELSA Wait. Slow down. No one’s brothers are staying here. No one is getting married. ANNA Wait, what? ELSA May I talk to you, please. Alone. Anna sees Hans’s worried face. Hooks arms with him. ANNA No. Whatever you have to say, youyou can say to both of us. ELSA Fine. You can’t marry a man you just met. ANNA You can if it’s true love. ELSA Anna, what do you know about true love? ANNA More than you. All you know is how to shut people out. ELSA You asked for my blessing, but my answer is no. Now, excuse me. FROZEN - J. Lee 30HANS Your Majesty, if I may ease your-- ELSA (flustered) No, you may not. And I-I think you should go. Elsa walks away. As she passes the Royal Handler-- ELSA (CONT’D) The party is over. Close the gates. ANNA What? Elsa, no. No, wait! Anna grabs Elsa’s hand. She pulls off Elsa’s glove. Elsa gasps, spins around and reaches for the glove in panic. ELSA Give me my glove! Anna holds the glove away from Elsa. ANNA (desperate) Elsa, please. Please. I can’t live like this anymore. Elsa fights tears. ELSA (weak) ...Then leave. Elsa sees Anna’s hurt face. It’s too much. She can’t hold it in. She turns and rushes away. ANNA (heartbroken) ...What did I ever do to you?! The party goes silent as everyone watches the sisters. ELSA Enough, Anna. ANNA No. Why? Why do you shut me out?! Why do you shut the world out?! What are you so afraid of?! ELSA I said, enough! FROZEN - J. Lee 31Ice shoots from Elsa’s hand, spikes across the floor! Guests cry out in shock, back away. DUKE (ducking behind his men) ...Sorcery. I knew there was something dubious going on here. ANNA Elsa...? Elsa rushes out of the room. CUT TO: EXT. COURTYARD — NIGHT Elsa bursts out of the castle door. The CITIZENS CHEER! CROWD There she is. Your Majesty! Long live the Queen! Queen Elsa.... Come drink with us. Elsa ducks through the crowd, holding her bare hand. BOWING TOWNSMAN Queen Elsa. TOWNSWOMAN WITH BABY Your Majesty? Are you all right? Elsa backs away from the baby. She knocks into the fountain, grabs its edge. The waters freeze at her touch. GASPS of shock and fear sweep over the crowd. The Duke and thugs come out the door. DUKE There she is! Stop her! ELSA (to the Duke) Please, just stay away from me. Stay away! Magic accidentally shoots from her hand and turns the staircase into ice. The thugs and the Duke fall. DUKE Monster.... Monster! FROZEN - J. Lee 32The crowd panics. A snowstorm begins. Elsa flees. Anna runs out of the palace doors, carrying the glove. ANNA Elsa! Hans follows closely behind her. GATES TO THE KINGDOM: Elsa runs out of the gates and down to the water’s edge. The shoreline freezes under her feet. Anna calls to her from the gates. ANNA (CONT’D) Elsa! Wait, please! Elsa glances back at Anna, but turns away. She tentatively steps out onto the fjord. It freezes instantly. She breaks into a run, as the water freezes over with each step. ANNA (CONT’D) Elsa, stop! Anna rushes out onto the fjord ice, slips, falls. HANS Anna! Hans rushes to Anna’s side. Elsa reaches the far shore. She doesn’t look back. She just scrambles into the mountains. ANNA No. HANS (shocked) Look.... The fjord. The ice spreads out until the entire fjord is frozen, locking the ships in place. INT. CASTLE COURTYARD — NIGHT Snow falls. Hans and Anna move through the panicking crowd. CROWD WALLAH Snow? It’s...snow...in July. FROZEN - J. Lee 33HANS ...Are you all right? ANNA (in shock) No. HANS Did you know? ANNA No. Nearby, the Duke flutters about in fright. DUKE Look! It’s snowing! It’s snowing! The Queen has cursed this land! She must be stopped! (to his thugs) You have to go after her. Anna rushes up to the Duke. ANNA Wait, no! The Duke hides behind his thugs and points out at Anna. DUKE You! Is there sorcery in you, too? Are you a monster, too? ANNA No. No. I’m completely ordinary. HANS That’s right she is... (realizing how that sounds) ...in the best way. ANNA ...And my sister’s not a monster. DUKE She nearly killed me. HANS You slipped on ice. DUKE Her ice! FROZEN - J. Lee 34ANNA It was an accident. She was scared. She didn’t mean it. She didn’t mean any of this.... Tonight was my fault. I pushed her. So I’m the one that needs to go after her. DUKE Yes. Fine. Do. HANS What? ANNA (to the Royal Handler) Bring me my horse, please. HANS Anna, no. It’s too dangerous. ANNA Elsa’s not dangerous. I’ll bring her back, and I’ll make this right. The Royal Handler brings Anna her horse and a cloak. HANS I’m coming with you. ANNA No, I need you here to take care of Arendelle. He sees the desperation in her eyes. HANS ...On my honor. She throws on the cloak and hops right onto the horse, coronation dress and all. ANNA (to the crowd) I leave Prince Hans in charge! HANS (before letting her go) Are you sure you can trust her? I don’t want you getting hurt. ANNA She’s my sister; she would never hurt me. FROZEN - J. Lee 35She snaps the reins and rides out. Hans watches after her. The snow picks up and overtakes our view. We push through a blizzard...lose our way...then finds ourselves... EXT. HIGH UP IN THE MOUNTAINS — NIGHT Well above the snow-line, a small figure climbs the highest peak. It’s Elsa. Finally, she stops, looks around. Catches her breath and sings... “Let It Go” ELSA THE SNOW GLOWS WHITE ON THE MOUNTAIN TONIGHT, NOT A FOOTPRINT TO BE SEEN. A KINGDOM OF ISOLATION AND IT LOOKS LIKE I'M THE QUEEN. THE WIND IS HOWLING LIKE THIS SWIRLING STORM INSIDE. COULDN'T KEEP IT IN, HEAVEN KNOWS I TRIED. . . DON'T LET THEM IN, DON'T LET THEM SEE, BE THE GOOD GIRL YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE. CONCEAL, DON'T FEEL, DON'T LET THEM KNOW. WELL, NOW THEY KNOW. Elsa takes off her glove and throws it into the air. ELSA (CONT’D) LET IT GO. LET IT GO. CAN'T HOLD IT BACK ANYMORE. Elsa creates a snowman, just like the one she made with Anna when they were children. ELSA (CONT’D) LET IT GO. LET IT GO. TURN AWAY AND SLAM THE DOOR. I DON'T CARE WHAT THEY’RE GOING TO SAY. LET THE STORM RAGE ON. THE COLD NEVER BOTHERED ME ANYWAY. Elsa lets her cape fly back into the wind. FROZEN - J. Lee 36ELSA (CONT’D) IT'S FUNNY HOW SOME DISTANCE MAKES EVERYTHING SEEM SMALL. AND THE FEARS THAT ONCE CONTROLLED ME CAN'T GET TO ME AT ALL. IT'S TIME TO SEE WHAT I CAN DO, TO TEST THE LIMITS AND BREAK THROUGH. NO RIGHT, NO WRONG, NO RULES FOR ME...I'M FREE! Elsa creates ice steps and climbs them. ELSA (CONT’D) LET IT GO! LET IT GO! I AM ONE WITH THE WIND AND SKY. LET IT GO! LET IT GO! YOU'LL NEVER SEE ME CRY. HERE I STAND AND HERE I'LL STAY. Elsa slams her foot down and forms a giant snowflake. ELSA (CONT’D) LET THE STORM RAGE ON.... In a flurry of creative release, she raises the snowflake on ice beams, builds walls, archways, a glistening chandelier, and an intricate ceiling that leaves the sky visible. ELSA (CONT’D) MY POWER FLURRIES THROUGH THE AIR INTO THE GROUND. MY SOUL IS SPIRALING IN FROZEN FRACTALS ALL AROUND. AND ONE THOUGHT CRYSTALLIZES LIKE AN ICY BLAST Standing firmly in her mighty ice palace, Elsa removes her crown and throws it. ELSA (CONT’D) I'M NEVER GOING BACK, (back to resolve) THE PAST IS IN THE PAST! She takes down her hair and creates a new dress made of ice. ELSA (CONT’D) LET IT GO! LET IT GO! AND I'LL RISE LIKE THE BREAK OF DAWN. LET IT GO! LET IT GO! The sun rises. Elsa struts onto out onto a balcony and into the light. She’s free. FROZEN - J. Lee 37ELSA (CONT’D) THAT PERFECT GIRL IS GONE. HERE I STAND IN THE LIGHT OF DAY. LET THE STORM RAGE ON!! THE COLD NEVER BOTHERED ME ANYWAY. She turns and slams her ice palace door on us. CUT TO: EXT. THE FJORD FOREST — DAY Anna rides her horse through two feet of snow. She shivers. ANNA (shivering) Elsa! Elsa! It’s me, Anna...your sister who didn’t mean to make you freeze the summer. I’m sorry. It’s all my f-f-f-f-f-f-fault. DISSOLVE TO: LATER: Anna and the horse struggle through a wooded area. ANNA (CONT’D) (hearing a wolf howl) Of course, none of this would have happened if she’d just told me her secret...ha...she’s a stinker. A branch of a nearby tree snaps and startles the horse. Anna goes flying off, lands face down in the snow. She sits up. Spits out snow. Sees the horse running away. ANNA (CONT’D) Oh no. No. No. No. Come back. No. No. No. No.... Oooo-kay. He doesn’t come back. Anna grabs onto a branch of a leaning conifer, tries to pull herself to her feet, but the tree snaps upright and releases all its snow onto her. GROAN. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOUNTAIN — NIGHT The Northern Lights shine as Anna struggles, out of breath, reaching the top of a hill. FROZEN - J. Lee 38ANNA Snow, it had to be snow, she couldn’t have had tr-tr-tropical magic that covered the f-f-fjords in white sand and warm -- She sees smoke rising up in the distance. ANNA (CONT’D) Fire! WHOA! Anna goes tumbling down the hill. She lands with a crash in an icy stream at the bottom. ANNA (CONT’D) (from inside the snowball) Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold... EXT. A SMALL BUILDING AND STABLE — NIGHT Anna shuffles up to the building, her dress frozen stiff. She shakes the snow off a sign and reads: ANNA Wandering Oaken’s Trading Post. Snow drops off a smaller sign. She reads it, happily. ANNA (CONT’D) Ooh! And Sauna... INT. WANDERING OAKEN’S TRADING POST & SAUNA — NIGHT Anna steps cautiously through the door--which hits her frozen butt and knocks her into the center of the shop. She looks around, sees only summer supplies. OAKEN (O.S.) Hoo hoo. Anna turns to see a bright-faced fellow sitting low behind the counter, fingers tapping tip to tip. OAKEN (CONT’D) Big summer blow out. Half off swimming suits, clogs, and a sun balm of my own invention, yah? ANNA Oh, great. For now, how about boots. Winter boots...and dresses? FROZEN - J. Lee 39OAKEN (slight disappointment) That would be in our winter department. The winter department contains one outfit, a pick ax, and a lonely pair of boots. ANNA Oh. Um, I was just wondering; has another young woman, the Queen perhaps, I don’t know, passed through here? She brings the clothes and boots to the counter. OAKEN Only one crazy enough to be out in this storm is you, dear? The front door suddenly blows open and in walks a mass of a man covered in ice. Underneath is KRISTOFF. OAKEN (CONT’D) You and this fellow.... Hoo hoo. Big summer blow out. Kristoff walks right up to Anna. KRISTOFF (in her face) Carrots. ANNA Huh? KRISTOFF Behind you. ANNA Oh, right. Excuse me. Anna moves out of Kristoff’s way. He grabs a bunch of carrots, tosses them on the counter, then moves through the place, gathering other supplies. OAKEN (to Kristoff) A real howler in July, yah? Where ever could it be coming from? KRISTOFF The North Mountain. FROZEN - J. Lee 40ANNA (to herself) North Mountain. Kristoff brings his supplies to the counter. Oaken counts on his fingertips. OAKEN That’ll be forty. KRISTOFF Forty? No, ten. OAKEN (sweet as pie) Oh dear, that’s no good. See these are from our winter stock, where supply and demand have a big problem. KRISTOFF You want to talk about a supply and demand problem? I sell ice for a living. Kristoff motions out the window, where we see the blocks of ice on his sled, covered in snow. ANNA Ooh, that’s a rough business to be in right now. I mean, that is really... (he shoots her a look) Ahem. That’s unfortunate. OAKEN Still forty. But I will throw in a visit to Oaken’s sauna. Hoo hoo! Hi, family. Kristoff and Anna turn to see a naked family waving through the window of the steaming sauna. NAKED FAMILY Hoo hoo! KRISTOFF ...Ten’s all I got. Help me out. OAKEN (isolating the carrots) Ten will get you this and no more. Kristoff seethes. Stalemate. FROZEN - J. Lee 41ANNA Okay, just tell me one thing; what was happening on the North Mountain? Did it seem magical? Kristoff pulls down his scarf and gives Anna a firm answer. KRISTOFF Yes! Now, back up while I deal with this crook here. Oaken stands up, revealing his seven-foot stature. OAKEN What did you call me? EXT. WANDERING OAKEN’S TRADING POST AND SAUNA — NIGHT Oaken stomps out the door, carrying Kristoff with one arm. KRISTOFF Okay. Okay, I’m- Ow! Whoa! Oaken throws Kristoff, who face-plants in the snow. OAKEN Bye bye. Oaken slams the door. Kristoff sits up. His reindeer, Sven, canters over, snorts, and nudges him, expectantly. KRISTOFF No Sven, I didn’t get your carrots. Sven huffs in his face. Kristoff turns away and sees something. He points to a dilapidated barn. KRISTOFF (CONT’D) But I did find us a place to sleep. And it’s free. INT. WANDERING OAKEN’S TRADING POST AND SAUNA — NIGHT Anna stands watching Oaken and all his great height as he squeezes behind the counter and sits down low again. OAKEN (teddy bear) I’m sorry about this violence. I will add a quart of lutefisk, so we’ll have good feelings. Just the outfit and boots, yah? FROZEN - J. Lee 42Anna looks between Kristoff’s supplies and the door. CUT TO: INT. OAKEN’S STABLES - NIGHT Kristoff, now unfrozen, relaxes on a bed of hay, playing his lute and singing to (and for) Sven. ”Reindeer(s) are Better than People” KRISTOFF REINDEERS ARE BETTER THAN PEOPLE. SVEN, DON'T YOU THINK THAT'S TRUE? KRISTOFF (AS SVEN) (CONT’D) (throwing his voice) YEAH, PEOPLE WILL BEAT YOU & CURSE YOU & CHEAT YOU. EVERY ONE OF EM'S BAD, EXCEPT YOU. (speaking) Oh, thanks, Buddy. (singing, as Kristoff) BUT PEOPLE SMELL BETTER THAN REINDEERS. SVEN, DON'T YOU THINK I'M RIGHT? (As Sven) THAT’S ONCE AGAIN TRUE, FOR ALL EXCEPT YOU. (As Kristoff) YOU GOT ME. LET'S CALL IT A NIGHT. (As Sven) GOOD NIGHT. (As Kristoff) DON'T LET THE FROSTBITE BITE.

i solemnly swear i am up to no good
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone -- Scene 1: Doorstep Delivery. -- LOCATION: Privet Drive - night DUMBLEDORE: I should have known that you would be here, Professor McGonagall. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Good evening, Professor Dumbledore. Are the rumors true, Albus? DUMBLEDORE: I'm afraid so, Professor. The good, and the bad. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: And the boy? DUMBLEDORE: Hagrid is bringing him. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Do you think it wise to trust Hagrid with something as important as this? DUMBLEDORE: Ah, Professor, I would trust Hagrid with my life. HAGRID: Professor Dumbledore, sir. Professor McGonagall, ah. DUMBLEDORE: No problems I trust, Hagrid? HAGRID: No, sir. Little tyke fell asleep just as we were flying over Bristol. Try not to wake ‘im. There yeh go. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Albus, do you really think it's safe leaving him with these people? I've watched them all day. There're the worst sort of Muggles imaginable! They really areDUMBLEDORE: ...the only family he has. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: This boy will be famous. There won't be a child in our world who doesn't know his name. DUMBLEDORE: Exactly. He's far better off growing up away from all of thatuntil he is ready. HAGRID: (Sniff) Ah. DUMBLEDORE: There, there, Hagrid. It's not really goodbye, after all. Good luck, Harry Potter. -- Title -- Scene 2: Vanishing Glass. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – the Cupboard under the Stairs - morning AUNT PETUNIA: Up! Get up! Now! DUDLEY: Wake up, cousin! We're going to the zoo! Ha, ha, ha! Ha, ha! AUNT PETUNIA: Oh! Here he comes, the birthday boy! UNCLE VERNON: Happy Birthday, son. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Kitchen - morning AUNT PETUNIA: Why don't you just cook the breakfast, and try not to burn anything. HARRY: Yes, Aunt Petunia. AUNT PETUNIA: I want everything to be perfect for my Dudley's special day! UNCLE VERNON: Hurry up! Bring my coffee, boy! HARRY: Yes, Uncle Vernon. AUNT PETUNIA: Aren't they wonderful, darling? Ahh! DUDLEY: How many are there? UNCLE VERNON: Thirty-six. Counted them myself. DUDLEY: Thirty-six?! But last year, last year I had thirty-seven!!! UNCLE VERNON: Yes, but some of them are quite a bit bigger than last year's! DUDLEY: I don't care how big they are! AUNT PETUNIA: Now, now, now, this is what we're going to do, is that when we go out, we're going to buy you two new presents. How's that pumpkin? -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – driveway - daytime AUNT PETUNIA: It should be a lovely day at the zoo. I'm really looking forward to it. UNCLE VERNON: I'm warning you now, boy. Any funny business- any at all- and you won't have any meals for a week! Get in. -- LOCATION: Zoo – Reptile House exterior - daytime -- LOCATION: Zoo – Reptile House interior - daytime DUDLEY: Make it move. UNCLE VERNON: Move! DUDLEY: Move! HARRY: He's asleep. DUDLEY: He's boring. HARRY: Sorry about him. He doesn't understand what it's like, lying there day after day, watching people press their ugly faces in on you. Can you hear me? It's just- I've never talked to a snake before. Do you- only, do you talk to people often? You're from Burma, aren't you? Was it nice there? Do you miss your family? I see. That's me as well. I never knew my parents, either. DUDLEY: Mummy, Dad, come here! You won't believe what this snake is doing! Woah! Woah! Ah! SNAKE: Thanksss. HARRY: Any time. OTHER: Snake! OTHERS: Ahh! Aeee! DUDLEY: Mum! Mummy! Help! Help! Help me! Help me! AUNT PETUNIA: My darling boy! How did you get in there! Who did this? How did you get in there? Is there a snake? Is there a snake? -- Scene 3: Letters from No One. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – entryway AUNT PETUNIA: It's all right, sweetheart. We'll get you out of these terrible clothes. HARRY: Ahh! UNCLE VERNON: What happened!? HARRY: I swear, I don't know! UNCLE VERNON: Argh! HARRY: One minute the glass was there, and then it was gone. It was like magic! UNCLE VERNON: There's no such thing as magic! -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – roof - morning -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – entryway - morning -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Kitchen - morning UNCLE VERNON: Oh, Marge’s ill. Ate a funny whelk. DUDLEY: Dad! Look! Harry's got a letter! HARRY: Hey, give it back! It's mine! UNCLE VERNON: Yours? Who'd be writing to you? HARRY: (gulp) -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – exterior - daytime -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – entryway - daytime -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – the Cupboard under the Stairs - daytime UNCLE VERNON: No more mail through this letterbox. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – driveway - morning AUNT PETUNIA: Have a lovely day at the office, dear. (kiss) UNCLE VERNON: Shoo! Go on! -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – living room - night -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – living room - daytime UNCLE VERNON: Fine day, Sunday; in my opinion, best day of the week. Why is that, Dudley? HARRY: Because there's no post on Sundays? UNCLE VERNON: Right you are, Harry. No post on Sunday. Ha! No blasted letters today! No, sir! Not one single bloody letter! Not one! No sir, not one blasted, miserableDUDLEY: Uh! Ahh! Make it stop. Please make it, make it stop! Please! UNCLE VERNON: Stop it! Stop it! Argh! DUDLEY: Please! Uh-huhh! AUNT PETUNIA: Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! Ahhhh! DUDLEY: Mummy, what's happening? Please tell me what’s happening? Get away from it! UNCLE VERNON: Ahh! Give me that! Give me that letter! HARRY: Get off! AUNT PETUNIA: Ahh! Oh! HARRY: They're my letters! Let go of me! UNCLE VERNON: That's it! We're going away! Far away! Where they can't find us! DUDLEY: Daddy's gone mad, hasn't he? -- Scene 4: Keeper of the Keys. -- LOCATION: House on the Rock – exterior – stormy night -- LOCATION: House on the Rock – living room - night HARRY: Make a wish, Harry. UNCLE VERNON: Who's there? AUNT PETUNIA: Ahh! DUDLEY: Ahh! HAGRID: Sorry abou’ that. UNCLE VERNON: I demand that you leave at once, sir. You are breaking and entering! AUNT PETUNIA: Oh! HAGRID: Dry up, Dursley, yeh great prune. Boy, I haven't seen you since you was a baby, Harry, but you're a bit more along than I would have expected; particularly around the middle. Heh, heh. DUDLEY: Ah, I'm not... I'm not Harry. HARRY: I- I am. HAGRID: Well, of course you are! Got somethin’ fer yeh. ‘Fraid I might have sat on it at some point, but I imagine it'll taste fine just the same, ah. Ahh, baked it myself, words and all. HARRY: Thank you! HAGRID: It's not everyday your young man turns eleven, now it is? Eh? HARRY: Excuse me, but who are you? HAGRID: Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of Keys and Grounds at Hogwarts. Of course, you’ll know all about Hogwarts. HARRY: Sorry, no. HAGRID: No? Blimey, Harry, didn't you ever wonder how your mum and dad learned it all? HARRY: Learnt what? HAGRID: You're a wizard, Harry. HARRY: I- I'm a what? HAGRID: A wizard. And a thumpin' good un, I'd wager, once you're trained up a little. HARRY: No, you've made a mistake. I mean, I... can't be a, a, a wizard... I mean, I'm... just... Harry. Just Harry! HAGRID: Well, "Just Harry", did you ever make anything happen? Anything you couldn't explain, when you were angry... or, or scared? Um- hum. DUDLEY: Oh, huh, huh... HARRY: “Dear Mr. Potter, we are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.” UNCLE VERNON: He will not be going, I tell you! We swore when we took him in that we’d put a stop to all of this rubbish! HARRY: You knew? You knew all along and you never told me? AUNT PETUNIA: Of course, we knew. How could you not be? My perfect sister being who she was? Oh, my mother and father were so proud the day she got her letter. ‘We have a witch in the family. Isn't it wonderful?’ I was the only one to see her for what she was- a freak! And then she met that Potter, and then she had you, and I knew you would be the same, just as strange, just as...abnormal. And then, if you please, she went and got herself blown up, and we got landed with you. HARRY: Blown up?! You told me my parents died in a car crash! HAGRID: A car crash? A car crash kill Lily and James Potter? AUNT PETUNIA: We had to say something. HAGRID: It's an outrage! It's a scandal! UNCLE VERNON: He’ll not be going. HAGRID: Oh-ho, ho, and I suppose a great Muggle like yerself is gonna stop ‘im. HARRY: Muggle? HAGRID: Non-magic folk. This boy's had ‘is name down since he were born. He's goin’ to the finest school of witchcraft and wizardry in the world. And, he'll be under the finest headmaster that Hogwarts has ever seen, Albus Dumbledore... UNCLE VERNON: I will not pay to have some crack pot old fool teach him magic tricks! HAGRID: Never... insult... Albus Dumbledore... in front of me... DUDLEY: Whoa! AUNT PETUNIA: Ahh! Ahhh! UNCLE VERNON: Ahh! No! DUDLEY: Ahh! Ahhh! Get it off! Get it off! HAGRID: Oh, uh- I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone at Hogwarts abou’ that. Strictly speaking, I'm not allowed to do magic. HARRY: OK. HAGRID: Oh, ah... we're a bit behind schedule. Best be off- unless you'd rather stay, o’ course. Hmm. -- Scene 5: Diagon Alley. -- LOCATION: London – outdoors – daytime -- LOCATION: London – street - daytime HARRY: “All students must be equipped with... one standard size two pewter cauldron, and may bring, if they desire, either an owl, a cat, or a toad.” Can we find all this in London? HAGRID: If yeh know where to go. -- LOCATION: Leaky Cauldron - daytime TOM: Ah, Hagrid! The usual, I presume? HAGRID: No thanks, Tom, I'm on official Hogwarts business. Just helping young Harry, here, buy his school supplies. TOM: Bless my soul, it's Harry Potter. OTHER: Welcome back, Mr. Potter! Welcome back! DORIS CROCKFORD: Doris Crockford, Mr. Potter. I can't believe I'm meeting you at last! PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Harry P- P- Potter. C-can't tell you how p- pleased I am to meet you. HAGRID: Hello, Professor. I didn't see you there. Harry, this is Professor Quirrell. He’ll be your Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, at Hogwarts. HARRY: Oh, nice to meet you. PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: A fearfully fascinating subject. N- not that you need it, eh, P- Potter? Huh? HAGRID: Yes, well, we must be goin’ now. Lots to buy. Huh, huh, huh. HARRY: Good-bye. -- LOCATION: Diagon Alley – entryway - daytime HAGRID: See, Harry? You're famous! HARRY: But, why am I famous, Hagrid? All those people back there- how is it they know who I am? HAGRID: I'm not exactly sure I'm the right person to tell you that, Harry. Welcome, Harry, to Diagon Alley. -- LOCATION: Diagon Alley - daytime HAGRID: Here's where you get your quills and your ink. And over there, all your bits and bobs for doing your wizardry. OTHER: Look! It's a racing broom! OTHER: Wow! Look at it! The new Nimbus 2000! It's the fastest model yet! -- Scene 6: Gringotts. -- LOCATION: Diagon Alley - daytime HARRY: But Hagrid, how am I to pay for all this? I haven't any money. HAGRID: Well, there's your money Harry! Gringotts, the wizard bank! T’ain't no safer place, not one! 'Cept perhaps Hogwarts. -- LOCATION: Gringotts – lobby - daytime HARRY: Uh, Hagrid, what exactly are these things? HAGRID: They're goblins, Harry. Clever as they come, goblins, but not the most friendly of beasts. Best stay close. Ahem...Mr. Harry Potter wishes to make a withdrawal. GOBLIN: Ah- and does Mr. Harry Potter have his key? HAGRID: Oh, uh- wait a minute, got it here somewhere. Ha! There's the little devil. Oh, and there's something else, as well. Professor Dumbledore gave me this. It's about You-Know-What, in vault You-Know-Which. GOBLIN: Very well. -- LOCATION: Gringotts - underground - dark GRIPHOOK: Vault six hundred and eighty-seven. Lamp, please. Key, please. -- LOCATION: Gringotts – vault six hundred and eighty-seven HAGRID: Ya didn't think your mum and dad would leave you with nothing, now did you? -- LOCATION: Gringotts – vault seven hundred and thirteen - dark GRIPHOOK: Vault seven hundred and thirteen. HARRY: What's in there, Hagrid? HAGRID: Can't tell you, Harry. Hogwarts business. Very secret. GRIPHOOK: Stand back. HAGRID: Best not to mention this to anyone, Harry. -- Scene 7: Ollivanders. -- LOCATION: Diagon Alley - daytime HARRY: I still need... a wand. HAGRID: A wand? Well, you want Ollivanders. There ain't no place better. Why don't you run along there and wait. I’ve got one more thing to do. Won't be long. -- LOCATION: Ollivanders Wand Shop - daytime HARRY: Hello? Hello? MR. OLLIVANDER: I wondered when I'd be seeing you, Mr. Potter. It seems only yesterday that you mother and father were in here buying their first wands. Ah... here we are. Well, give it a wave. Apparently not! Perhaps...this? No, no, definitely not. No matter. I wonder... Curious... very curious. HARRY: S-sorry, but what's curious? MR. OLLIVANDER: I remember every wand I've ever sold, Mr. Potter. It so happens that the phoenix whose tail feather resides in your wand gave another feather. Just one other. It is curious that you should be destined for this wand, when its brother gave you that scar. HARRY: And who owned that wand? MR. OLLIVANDER: We do not speak his name. The wand chooses the wizard, Mr. Potter. It’s not always clear why. But, I think it is clear that we can expect great things from you. After all, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named did great things. Terrible, yes. But great. HAGRID: Harry. Harry! Happy Birthday! HARRY: Wow! -- Scene 8: The Boy Who Lived. -- LOCATION: Leaky Cauldron - daytime HAGRID: You all right, Harry? You seem very quiet. HARRY: He killed my parents didn't he? The one who gave me this. You know, Hagrid. I know you do. HAGRID: First, and understand this, Harry, because it's very important. Not all wizards are good. Some of them go bad. A few years ago, there was one wizard that went as bad as you can go. And his name was V-. His name was V-. HARRY: Well, maybe if you wrote it down? HAGRID: Nah, I can't spell it. All right... Voldemort. HARRY: Voldemort? HAGRID: Shh! It was dark times, Harry, dark times. -- LOCATION: Godric’s Hollow - Potter house – exterior - night HAGRID: (voiceover) Voldemort started to gather some followers. Brought ‘em over to the Dark Side. Anyone who stood up to him ended up dead. -- LOCATION: Godric’s Hollow - Potter house – interior - night HAGRID: (voiceover) Your parents fought against ‘im. But nobody lived once he decided to kill ‘em. -- LOCAITON: Godric’s Hollow - Potter house – exterior – night -- LOCATION: Godric’s Hollow - Potter house – interior - night HAGRID: (voiceover) Nobody, not one. ‘Cept you. -- LOCATION: Leaky Cauldron - daytime HARRY: Me? Voldemort tried to kill... me? HAGRID: Yes. That ain't no ordinary cut on your forehead, Harry. A mark like that only comes from being touched by a curse, and an evil curse at that. HARRY: What happened to V-... to You-Know-Who? HAGRID: Well, some say he died. Codswallop, in my opinion. Nope, I reckon he's out there still. Too tired to carry on. But one thing's absolutely certain. Somethin’ about you stumped him that night. That's why you're famous. That's why everybody knows your name. You're ‘The Boy Who Lived!’ -- Scene 9: Platform 9- 3/4. -- LOCATION: London – King’s Cross Station - daytime HAGRID: What’re you lookin’ at? Blimey, is that time!? Sorry, Harry, but I'm gonna have to leave you. Dumbledore would be wantin’ his... Well, he'll be wantin’ to see me. Now, your train leaves in ten minutes. Here's your ticket. Stick to it Harry, that's very important. Stick to your ticket. HARRY: Platform nine and three-quarters? But, Hagrid, there must be a mistake. This says Platform nine and three-quarters. There's no such thing, is there? -- LOCATION: London - King’s Cross Station - Train platform - daytime OTHER: Sorry. HARRY: Excuse me! Excuse me! STATION GUARD: On your left, Madam. HARRY: Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me where I might find Platform nine and three-quarters? STATION GUARD: Nine and three-quarters? Think you're being funny, do ya? Nine and three-quarters... MRS. WEASLEY: It's the same every year. Packed with Muggles, of course. Come on! HARRY: Muggles? MRS. WEASLEY: Platform nine and three-quarters, this way! All right, Percy, you first. Fred, you next. GEORGE: He's not Fred, I am! FRED: Honestly, woman, you call yourself our mother! MRS. WEASLEY: Oh, I’m sorry, George. FRED: I’m only joking! I am Fred! HARRY: Excuse me! C- could you tell me... how to... MRS. WEASLEY: How to get onto the platform? Yes, not to worry, dear. It's Ron's first time to Hogwarts as well. Now, all you’ve got to do is walk straight at the wall between platforms nine and ten. Best do it at a bit of a run if you're nervous. GINNY: Good luck! -- Scene 10: Ron and Hermione. -- LOCATION: Platform nine and three-quarters - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – exterior - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – interior - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – interior – compartment - daytime RON: Excuse me, do you mind? Everywhere else is full. HARRY: Not at all. RON: I'm Ron, by the way! Ron Weasley. HARRY: I'm Harry. Harry Potter. RON: So, so it's true! I mean, do you really have the... the... HARRY: The what? RON: The scar? HARRY: Oh! Yeah... RON: Wicked! FOOD TROLLEY LADY: Anything off the trolley, dears? RON: No, thanks, I'm all set. HARRY: We'll take the lot! RON: Woah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – exterior - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – interior – compartment - daytime HARRY: “Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans?” RON: They mean every flavor! There's chocolate and peppermint, and there’s also spinach, liver, and tripe. George sweared he got boogie-flavored one once. HARRY: These aren't real frogs, are they? RON: It's just a spell. Besides, it's the cards you want. Each pack's got a famous witch or wizard. I’ve got about five hundred meself. Watch it! Aw, that's rotten luck. They've only got one good jump in them to begin with. HARRY: I've got Dumbledore! RON: I've got about six of him. HARRY: Hey, he's gone! RON: Well, you can't expect him to hang around all day, can you? This is Scabbers, by the way. Pathetic, isn't he? HARRY: Just a little bit. RON: Fred gave me a spell as to turn him yellow. Want to see? HARRY: Yeah! RON: Ahem... “Sun-” HERMIONE: Has anyone seen a toad? A boy named Neville's lost one. RON: No. HERMIONE: Oh, are you doing magic? Let's see then. RON: Ahem. “Sunshine, daisies, butter mellow, Turn this stupid, fat rat yellow.” HERMIONE: Are you sure that's a real spell? Well, it's not very good, is it? Of course, I've only tried a few simple ones myself. But they've all worked for me. For example: “Oculus reparo.” That's better, isn't it? Holy cricket! You're Harry Potter! I'm Hermione Granger. And... you are...? RON: I'm Ron Weasley. HERMIONE: Pleasure. You two better change into your robes. I expect we'll be arriving soon. You've got dirt on your nose, by the way. Did you know? Just there. -- Scene 11: Welcome to Hogwarts. -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - Train platform - night HAGRID: Right, then. Firs’ years this way, please! Come on, now! Firs’ years! Don't be shy. Come on now, hurry up! Come on! Hello, Harry! HARRY: Hi, Hagrid! RON: Woah! HAGRID: Right, then. This way to the boats. Come on, now. Follow me. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Black Lake – exterior - night RON: Wicked! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entry staircase - night PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Welcome to Hogwarts. Now, in a few moments you will pass through these doors and join your classmates, but before you take your seats, you must be sorted into your houses. They are Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Now while you're here, your house will be like your family. Your triumphs will earn you points. Any rule breaking, and you will lose points. At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the house cup. NEVILLE: Trevor! Sorry. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: The Sorting Ceremony will begin momentarily. DRACO: It's true then, what they were saying on the train. Harry Potter has come to Hogwarts. NEVILLE: Harry Potter! OTHER: Harry Potter... DRACO: This is Crabbe, and Goyle. And I'm Malfoy. Draco Malfoy. RON: Heh- heh... DRACO: Think my name's funny, do you? No need to ask you yours. Red hair, and a hand-me-down robe? You must be a Weasley. You'll soon find out that some wizarding families are better than others, Potter. You don't want to go making friends with the wrong sort. I can help you there. HARRY: I think I can tell the wrong sort for myself, thanks. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: We're ready for you now. Follow me. -- Scene 12: Sorting Hat. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – decorated for Start of Term Feast - night HERMIONE: It's not real, the ceiling. It's just bewitched to look like the night sky. I read about it in Hogwarts, A History. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Now, will you wait along here, please. Now... before we begin, Professor Dumbledore would like to say a few words. DUMBLEDORE: I have a few start-of-term notices I wish to announce. The first years please note that the Dark Forest is strictly forbidden to all students. Also, our caretaker, Mr. Filch, has asked me to remind you that the third floor corridor on the right hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a most painful death. Thank you. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Now, when I call your name you will come forth, I shall place the Sorting Hat on your head, and you will be sorted into your houses. Hermione Granger! HERMIONE: Oh, no. OK, relax. RON: Mental that one, I'm telling you. SORTING HAT: Ah, right then. Humm... right. Okay, Gryffindor! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Draco Malfoy! SORTING HAT: Slytherin! RON: There's not a witch or wizard who went bad who wasn't in Slytherin. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Susan Bones! HARRY: Ow! RON: Harry, what is it? HARRY: Nothing. Nothing, I'm fine. SORTING HAT: ...where shall I put you? Let's see... I know! Hufflepuff! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Ronald Weasley! SORTING HAT: Ha! Another Weasley! I know just what to do with you... Gryffindor! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Harry Potter. SORTING HAT: Hmmm... Difficult. Very difficult. Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind, either. There's talent. Oh yes, and a thirst...to prove yourself. But, where to put you... HARRY: Not Slytherin, not Slytherin! SORTING HAT: Not Slytherin, eh? Are you sure? You could be great, you know. It's all here in your head. And Slytherin will help you on the way to greatness, there's no doubt about that. No? HARRY: (whispering) Please, please, anything but Slytherin, anything but Slytherin. SORTING HAT: Well, if you're sure, better be... Gryffindor! -- Scene 13: Nick and Other Residents. LOCATION: Hogwarts - Great Hall – Start of Term feast – night - later PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Your attention, please. DUMBLEDORE: Let the feast begin! HARRY: Wow! SEAMUS: I'm half-and-half. Me dad's a Muggle, Mam's a witch. Bit of a nasty shock for him when he found out! HARRY: Say, Percy, who's that teacher talking to Professor Quirrell? PERCY: Oh, Professor Snape, head of Slytherin house. HARRY: What's he teach? PERCY: Potions. But, everyone knows it's the Dark Arts he fancies. He's been after Quirrell's job for years. RON: Ah! SIR NICHOLAS: Hello! How are you? Welcome to Gryffindor! HOGWARTS GHOSTS: Oo-ha-ha... Oooohooo! OTHER: It's the Bloody Baron! PERCY: Hello, Sir Nicholas. Have a nice summer? SIR NICHOLAS: Dismal. Once again, my request to join the Headless Hunt has been denied. RON: I know you! You're Nearly Headless Nick! SIR NICHOLAS: I prefer Sir Nicholas, if you don't mind. HERMIONE: Nearly headless? How can you be nearly headless? SIR NICHOLAS: Like this. RON: Ah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Moving staircase - night PERCY: Gryffindors, follow me, please. Keep up. Thank you. OTHER: Ravenclaw, follow me. This way. PERCY: This is the most direct path to the dormitories. Oh, and keep an eye on the staircases, they like to change. Keep up, please, and follow me. Quickly now, come on. Come on. OTHER: Jeez! That picture's moving! OTHER: Look at that one, Harry. OTHER: I think she fancies you. OTHER: Look, look! OTHER: Oh, who's that girl? PORTRAIT: Welcome to Hogwarts! OTHER: Who’s that? FAT LADY: Password? PERCY: Caput Draconis. SEAMUS: Wow! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room - night PERCY: Follow me, everyone. Keep up. Quickly, come on! Gather around here. Welcome to the Gryffindor common room. Boys' dormitories are upstairs and down to your left. Girls the same on your right. You'll find all your belongings have already been brought up. -- Scene 14: Potions and Parcels. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory - night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - morning -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Transfiguration classroom - daytime RON: Whew! We made it! Can you imagine the look on ol’ McGonagall's face if we were late? That was bloody brilliant! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Oh, thank-you for that assessment, Mr. Weasley. Perhaps it would be more useful if I transfigured Mr. Potter and yourself into a pocket watch? That way one of you might be on time. HARRY: We got lost. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Then, perhaps a map? I trust you don't need one to find your seats. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Potions dungeon - daytime SNAPE: There will be no foolish wand-waving or silly incantations in this class. As such, I don't expect many of you to appreciate the subtle science and exact art that is potion making. However, for those select few who possess the predisposition... I can teach you how to bewitch the mind and ensnare the senses. I can tell you how to bottle fame, brew glory, and even put a stopper in death. Then again, maybe some of you have come to Hogwarts in possession of abilities so formidable that you feel confident enough to not pay attention. Mr. Potter... our new celebrity. Tell me, what would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood? You don't know? Well, let's try again. Where, Mr. Potter, would you look if I asked you to find me a bezoar? HARRY: I- I don't know, sir. SNAPE: And, what is the difference between monkshood and wolfsbane? HARRY: I don't know, sir. SNAPE: Pity. Clearly, fame isn't everything, is it, Mr. Potter? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - daytime SEAMUS: Eye of rabbit, harp string hum, turn this water into rum...Eye of rabbit, harp string hum, turn this water into rum. HARRY: What's Seamus trying to do to that glass of water? RON: Turn it to rum. Actually, he managed a weak tea yesterday, before- Ah, mail's here. HARRY: Can I borrow this? Thanks. DEAN THOMAS: Hey, look! Neville's got a Remembrall!. HERMIONE: I've read about those. When the smoke turns red, it means you've forgotten something. NEVILLE: The only problem is, I can't remember what I have forgotten. HARRY: Hey, Ron, somebody broke into Gringotts. Listen: ‘Believed to be the work of Dark wizards or witches unknown, Gringotts goblins, while acknowledging the breach, insist nothing was taken. The vault in question, number seven one three, had been emptied earlier that very same day.’ That's odd. That's the vault Hagrid and I went to. -- Scene 15: New Seeker. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime MADAM HOOCH: Good afternoon, class. OTHERS: Good afternoon, Madam Hooch. MADAM HOOCH: Good afternoon, Amanda, good afternoon. Welcome to your first flying lesson. Well, what are you waiting for? Everyone step up to the left side of their broomstick. Come on now, hurry up. Stick your right hand over the broom and say “Up!” HARRY: Up! OTHERS: Up! Up! SEAMUS: Up! Up! HARRY: Wow! DRACO: Up. CRABBE: Up. Up. RON: Up. Up! MADAM HOOCH: With feeling! HERMIONE: Up. Up! Up. Up! RON: Up! Ow! HARRY: Heh, heh. RON: Shut up, Harry. MADAM HOOCH: Now, once you've got hold of your broom, I want you to mount it, and grip it tight. You don't want to be sliding off the end. When I blow my whistle, I want each of you to kick off from the ground, hard. Keep your broom steady, hover for a moment, then lean forward slightly, and touch back down. On my whistle...three, two...(tweet). Mr. Longbottom...Mis- Mis- MisMister Long-...Mister Longbottom! OTHERS: Down! Down! HARRY: Neville! NEVILLE: Help! Help! MADAM HOOCH: Come back down this instant! Mr. Longbottom! NEVILLE: Ooo! Ahh! Oooh! Ah! MADAM HOOCH: Mister Longbot... NEVILLE: Oooh! Whoa! Ugh! Ow! HERMIONE: Is he all right? MADAM HOOCH: Everyone, out of the way! NEVILLE: Ow, ow, ow... MADAM HOOCH: Oh, oh, oh. Oh, dear, it's a broken wrist. Poor boy. Come on now, up you get. Everyone is to keep their feet firmly on the ground while I take Mr. Longbottom to the hospital wing. Understand? If I see a single broom in the air, the one riding it will find themselves out of Hogwarts before they can say "Quidditch". DRACO: Did you see his face? Maybe if the fat lump had given this a squeeze, he would’ve remembered to fall on his fat arse. HARRY: Give it here, Malfoy. DRACO: No, I think I'll leave it somewhere for Longbottom to find. How about on the roof? What's the matter, Potter? Bit beyond your reach? HERMIONE: Harry! No way! You heard what Madame Hooch said. Besides, you don't even know how to fly! What an idiot! HARRY: Give it here, Malfoy, or I'll knock you off your broom! DRACO: Is that so? Have it your way, then! OTHERS: Yeah! OTHER: Nice going, Harry! OTHER: That was wicked, Harry! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Harry Potter! Follow me. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor outside DADA classroom - daytime PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: You wait here. PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: ...this is an ingredient in... PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Professor Quirrell, excuse me. Excuse me, could I borrow Wood for a moment, please? PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Well, yes of course. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Potter, this is Oliver Wood. Wood, I have found you a Seeker! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - daytime SIR NICHOLAS: Have you heard? Harry Potter's the new Gryffindor Seeker. I always knew he'd do well! RON: Seeker? But, first years never make the house teams! You must be the youngest Quidditch player in... HARRY: ...a century. According to McGonagall. GEORGE: Well done, Harry! Wood's just told us! RON: Fred and George are on the team, too. Beaters. FRED: Our job is to make sure that you don't get bloodied up too bad. Can't make any promises, of course. Rough game, Quidditch. GEORGE: Brutal! But, no one's died in years. Someone will vanish, occasionally. FRED: But, they'll turn up in a month or two! RON: Oh, go on, Harry! Quidditch is great. Best game there is, and you'll be great, too! HARRY: But, I've never even played Quidditch! What if I make a fool of myself? HERMIONE: You won't make a fool of yourself. It's in your blood. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Trophy Room - daytime RON: Whoa! Harry, you never told me your father was a seeker, too! HARRY: I... didn't know. -- Scene 16: Three-headed Sentinel. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Moving staircase RON: I'm telling you, it's spooky! She knows more about you than you do! HARRY: Who doesn't? What's happening? HERMIONE: The staircases change, remember? HARRY: Let's go this way. RON: Before the staircase moves again! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – third floor corridor - dark RON: Does anybody feel like we shouldn't be here? HERMIONE: We're not supposed to be here. This is the third floor. It's forbidden! HARRY: Let's go. HERMIONE: It’s Filch's cat! HARRY: Run! Quick, let's hide through that door! It's locked! RON: That's it, we're done for! HERMIONE: Oh! Move over! Alohomora! Get in! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – trapdoor room - dark RON: Alohomora? HERMIONE: Standard Book Of Spells- Chapter Seven! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – third floor corridor - dark FILCH: Any one here, my sweet? Come on. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – trapdoor room - dark HERMIONE: Filch’s gone... RON: He probably thinks this door is locked. HERMIONE: It was locked. HARRY: And for good reason. HARRY, RON, HERMIONE: Ahhh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – third floor corridor - dark RON: What do they think they're doing? Keeping a thing like that locked up in a school? HERMIONE: You don't use your eyes do you? Didn't you see what it was standing on? RON: I wasn't looking at its feet! I was a bit preoccupied with its heads. Or maybe you didn't notice... there were three! HERMIONE: It was standing on a trap door. Which means, it wasn't there by accident. It's guarding something. HARRY: Guarding something? HERMIONE: That's right. Now, if you two don't mind, I'm going to bed before either of you come up with another clever idea to get killed, or worse... expelled! RON: She needs to sort out her priorities. -- Scene 17: Facts and Feathers. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime WOOD: Quidditch is easy enough to understand. Each team has seven players. Three Chasers, two Beaters, one Keeper, and the Seeker... that's you. There are three kinds of balls. This one's called the Quaffle. Now, the Chasers handle the Quaffle, and try to put it through one of those three hoops. The Keeper, that's me, defends the hoops. With me so far? HARRY: I think so. What are those? WOOD: You’d better take this. Careful now, it's coming back. Uh, not bad, Potter! You'd make a fair Beater. Uh-oh. HARRY: What was that? WOOD: Bludger. Nasty little buggers. But you... are a Seeker. The only thing I want you to worry about is this, the Golden Snitch. HARRY: I like this ball. WOOD: Ah, you like it now. But just wait. It's wicked fast, and damn near impossible to see. HARRY: What do I do with it? WOOD: You catch it. Before the other team's Seeker. You catch this, the game's over. You catch this, Potter, and we win. HARRY: Woah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Charms classroom - daytime PROFESSOR FLITWICK: One of a wizard's most rudimentary skills is levitation, or the ability to make objects fly. Ah, do you have your feathers? Good. Now, uh, don't forget the nice wrist movement we've been practicing. Hum! The "Swish and Flick". Everyone, the "Swish and Flick". Good! Oh, and enunciate! Wingardium leviosa. Off you go, then! OTHERS: Wingardium leviosa... Wingardium leviosa! RON: Wingardium leviosa! HERMIONE: No, stop, stop, stop! You're going to take someone's eye out! Besides, you're saying it wrong. It's “levi-o-sa”, not “levio-sar”. RON: You do it then, if you're so clever. Go on, go on! HERMIONE: Wingardium leviosa. PROFESSOR FLITWICK: Ho, oh! Well done! See here, everyone! Miss Granger's done it! Ho-ho! Splendid! SEAMUS: Wingard-leviosa... PROFESSOR FLITWICK: Well done, dear. SEAMUS: Wingard- leviosa (boom). PROFESSOR FLITWICK: Wha- Oh! HARRY: I think we're going to need another feather over here, Professor. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – outside - daytime RON: "It's levi-o-sa, not levio-sar." She's a nightmare, honestly! It's no wonder she hasn't got any friends! HARRY: I think she heard you. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - decorated for Halloween – stormy night HARRY: W- where's Hermione? NEVILLE: Parvati Patil said that she wouldn't come out of the girl's bathroom. She said that she'd been in there all afternoon, crying. PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Troll in the dungeon! Troll in the dungeon! Thought you ought to know. Hu... RON: Ahh! OTHERS: Ahh! DUMBLEDORE: Silence! Everyone will please not panic! Now, prefects, will lead their houses back to the dormitories. Teachers will follow me to the dungeons. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - night OTHER: This way! PERCY: Gryffindors, keep up, please, and stay alert! HARRY: How could a troll get in? RON: Not on its own. Trolls are really stupid. Probably people playing jokes. What? HARRY: Hermione! She doesn't know! RON: I think the troll's left the dungeon! HARRY: It's going into the girl's bathroom. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Girl’s bathroom - night TROLL: Arrgh! Arrgh! Arrgh! HERMIONE: Ahhh! HARRY: Hermione, move! HERMIONE: Help! Help! RON: Hey, pea brain! TROLL: Whar? Arrgh! HERMIONE: Ahh! Help! HARRY: Whoa! RON: Ugh! HARRY: Whoa! Do something! RON: What? HARRY: Anything! Hurry up! HERMIONE: "Swish & Flick!" RON: Wingardium Leviosa! TROLL: Wha... uh... wuh?... ugh! RON: Cool. HERMIONE: Is it dead? HARRY: I don’t think so. Just knocked out. TROLL: Uhh... HARRY: Ugh. RON: Troll boogies. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Oh, my goodness! Ex-explain yourselves, both of you! HARRY, RON: Well, what it is, isHERMIONE: It's my fault, Professor McGonagall. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Wha- Miss Granger? HERMIONE: I went looking for the troll. I've read about them, and I thought I could handle it. But I was wrong. If Harry and Ron hadn’t come and found me... I’d probably be dead. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Be that as it may, it was an extremely foolish thing to do. I would have expected more rational behavior on your part and I am very disappointed in you Miss Granger. Five points will be taken from Gryffindor for your serious lack of judgment. As for you two gentlemen, well, I just hope you realize how fortunate you are. Not many first year students could take on a fully-grown mountain troll, and live to tell the tale! Five points... will be awarded to each of you... for sheer dumb luck. PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: P- perhaps you ought to go. It m- might wake up. Huh! TROLL: Arggh... PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Ahh! Heh – heh... -- Scene 18: Mountain Troll. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - morning RON: Take a bit of toast, mate. Go on. HERMIONE: Ron's right, Harry. You're going to need your strength today. HARRY: I'm not hungry. SNAPE: Good luck today, Potter. Then again, now that you've proven yourself against a troll, a little game of Quidditch should be easy work for you. Even if it is against Slytherin. HARRY: That explains the blood. HERMIONE: Blood? HARRY: Listen, last night, I'm guessing Snape let the troll in as diversion so he could try and get past that three-headed dog. But, he got himself bitten. That's why he's limping. HERMIONE: But, why would anyone go near that dog? HARRY: The day I was at Gringotts, Hagrid took something out of one of the vaults. Said it was Hogwarts business, very secret. HERMIONE: So you're saying... HARRY: That's what the dog's guarding. That's what Snape wants. HERMIONE: A bit early for mail, isn't it? HARRY: But, I- I never get mail. RON: Let's open it. HARRY: It's a broomstick! RON: It's not just a broomstick, Harry. It's a Nimbus Two Thousand! HARRY: But, who-? -- Scene 19: Quidditch. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – under the stadium - daytime WOOD: Scared, Harry? HARRY: A little. WOOD: It's alright. I felt the same way before my first game. HARRY: What happened? WOOD: I... uh... I don't really remember... Took a Bludger to the head two minutes in. Woke up in the hospital a week later. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime LEE JORDAN: Hello! Welcome to Hogwart's first Quidditch game of the season! Today's game: Slytherin vs. Gryffindor! CROWD: Yeah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime LEE JORDAN: The players take their positions, as Madam Hooch steps out onto the field to begin the game! MADAME HOOCH: Now, I want a nice clean game... from all of you. LEE JORDAN: The Bludgers are up, followed by the Golden Snitch. Remember, the Snitch is worth a hundred and fifty points. The Seeker who catches the Snitch ends the game. The Quaffle is released, and the game begins! CROWD: Ooh! (Bing) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime LEE JORDAN: Angelina Johnson scores! Ten points for Gryffindor! CROWD: Yeah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime HARRY: Yes! Woah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime HAGRID: Well done! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime LEE JORDAN: Slytherin takes possession of the Quaffle. Bletchley passes to Captain Marcus Flint. (Bing) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime OTHERS: Yeah! Whoo-hoo! HARRY: Yes! LEE JORDAN: Another ten points to Gryffindor! OTHER: Yeah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime MARCUS FLINT: Give me that! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime OTHERS: Booo! Booo! DRACO: Heh, heh. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime (Bing) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime OTHERS: Yeah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime MARCUS FLINT: Take that side! OTHERS: Booo! Booo! Oh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime (Bing) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime OTHERS: Yeah! -- Scene 20: Interference Overcome. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Quidditch Pitch - daytime HARRY: Whoa! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime HAGRID: What's going on with Harry's broomstick? HERMIONE: It's Snape! He's jinxing the broom! RON: Jinxing the broom?! What’ll we do? HERMIONE: Leave it to me! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime RON: Come on, Hermione! HERMIONE: Lacarnum inflamarae. OTHER: Fire! You're on fire! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime HAGRID: Go, go, go, go! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime HARRY: Wha-umph! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Oh! OTHERS: Oh! HAGRID: Looks like he's gonna be sick! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch - daytime HARRY: (pop) LEE JORDAN: He's got the Snitch! Harry Potter receives one hundred and fifty points for catching the Snitch! MADAME HOOCH: (tweet) Gryffindor wins! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stands - daytime OTHERS: Yeah! RON: Yeah! DEAN THOMAS: Yeah! SEAMUS: Yeah! DRACO: Oh, no! HAGRID: Yes! HERMIONE: Whoo-hoo! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Ah-ha-ha-haa! OTHERS: Nice fight, Gryffindor! Nice fight, Gryffindor! Nice fight, Gryffindor! Nice fight, Gryffindor! Nice fight, Gryffindor! -- Scene 21: Christmas Gift. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime HAGRID: Nonsense! Why would Snape put a curse on Harry's broom? HARRY: Who knows? Why was he trying to get past that three-headed dog on Halloween? HAGRID: Who told you about Fluffy? RON: “Fluffy?” HERMIONE: That thing has a name? HAGRID: Well, of course, he's got a name! He's mine! I bought him off an Irish feller I met down at the pub last year. Then I lent ‘im to Dumbledore to guard the... HARRY: Yes? HAGRID: I shouldn't have said that. No more questions! Don't ask anymore questions! That's top-secret, that is. HARRY: But Hagrid, whatever Fluffy's guarding, Snape's trying to steal it! HAGRID: Codswallop! Professor Snape is a Hogwarts teacher! HERMIONE: Hogwarts teacher or not, I know a spell when I see one! I've read all about them. You've got to keep eye contact, and Snape wasn't blinking! HARRY: Exactly. HAGRID: Now, you listen to me, all three of ya. You're meddlin’ in things that ought not to be meddled in. It's dangerous! What that dog is guarding is strictly between Professor Dumbledore and Nicholas Flamel. HARRY: Nicholas Flamel? HAGRID: I shouldn't have said that. I should not have said that. I shouldn’t have said that... HARRY: Nicholas Flamel. Who's Nicholas Flamel? HERMIONE: I dunno. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – winter snow -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entryway - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - daytime HOGWARTS GHOSTS: Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas. Ring the Hogwart bell. Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas. Cast a Christmas spell. HARRY: Knight to E-5. RON: Queen to E-5. HERMIONE: That's totally barbaric! RON: That's wizard's chess. I see you've packed. HERMIONE: See you haven't. RON: Change of plans. My parents have decided to go to Romania, to visit my brother Charlie. He's studying dragons there. HERMIONE: Good. You can help Harry, then. He's going to go and look in the library for information on Nicholas Flamel. RON: We've looked a hundred times! HERMIONE: Not in the Restricted Section. Happy Christmas. RON: I think we’ve had a bad influence on her. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory - morning RON: Harry, wake up! Come on, Harry! Wake up! Happy Christmas, Harry! HARRY: Happy Christmas, Ron! What are you wearing? RON: Oh, me mum made it. Looks like you've got one too. HARRY: I've got presents? RON: Yeah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room - morning RON: There they are. HARRY: "Your father left this in my possession before he died. It is time it was returned to you. Use it well." RON: What is it? HARRY: Some kind of... cloak. RON: Well, let's see then! Put it on! Whoa! HARRY: My body’s gone! RON: I know what that is! That's an Invisibility Cloak! HARRY: I'm invisible? RON: They're really rare. I wonder who gave it to you. HARRY: There was no name. It just said, "Use it well." -- Scene 22: Cloaked in Darkness. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Library – Restricted Section - night HARRY: Famous Fire Eaters. Fifteenth Century Fiends. Flamel. Nicholas Flamel. Where are you? BOOK: Arrgh! FILCH: Who’s there? I know you're in there. You can't hide. Who is it? Show yourself! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - night PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Ah! Severus, I- I, I- I-I... SNAPE: You don't want me as your enemy, Quirrell. PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: W-what do you mean? SNAPE: You know perfectly well what I mean... We'll have another little chat soon... when you've had time to decide where your loyalties lie. FILCH: Oh-- Professors. I found this in the Restricted Section. It's still hot. That means there's a student out of bed. -- Scene 23: Mirror of Erised. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – unused classroom - night HARRY: Mum, Dad? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory - night HARRY: Ron! You've really gotta see this! Ron! You've gotta see this! Ron! Ron, come on, get out of bed! RON: Why? HARRY: There's something you've got to see! Now, come on! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - unused classroom - night HARRY: Come on! Come! Come look! It's my parents! RON: I only see us. HARRY: Look in properly. Go on, stand there. There! You see them, don't you? That's--- RON: That's me! Only, I'm Head Boy. And I'm holding the Quidditch Cup. A-and, bloody hell! I'm Quidditch captain, too! I look good! Harry, do you think this mirror shows the future? HARRY: How can it? Both my parents are dead. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - unused classroom - night DUMBLEDORE: Back again, Harry? I see that you, like so many before you, have discovered the delights of the Mirror of Erised. I trust, by now, you realize what it does. Let me give you a clue. The happiest man on Earth would look into the mirror and only see himself exactly as he is. HARRY: So then, it shows us what we want... whatever we want? DUMBLEDORE: Yes, and no. It shows us nothing more or less than the deepest, and most desperate, desires of our hearts. Now you, Harry, who have never known your family, you see them standing beside you. But remember this, Harry, this mirror gives us neither knowledge or truth. Men have wasted away in front of it. Even gone mad. That is why tomorrow it will be moved to a new home. And I must ask you not to go looking for it again. It does not do to dwell on dreams, Harry, and forget to live. -- Scene 24: Norbert. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – daytime - with snow -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – daytime - without snow -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Library - daytime HERMIONE: I had you looking in the wrong section! How could I be so stupid? I checked this out weeks ago for a bit of light reading! RON: This is light? HERMIONE: Ah, of course! Here it is! ‘Nicholas Flamel is the only known maker of the Sorcerer's Stone.’ HARRY, RON: The what? HERMIONE: Honestly, don't you two read? ‘The Sorcerer's Stone is a legendary substance with astonishing powers. It will transform any metal into pure gold and produces the Elixir of Life, which will make the drinker immortal.’ RON: Immortal! HERMIONE: It means you'll never die. RON: I know what it means! HARRY: Shhh! HERMIONE: ‘The only stone currently in existence belongs to Mr. Nicholas Flamel, the noted alchemist who last year celebrated his six hundred and sixty-fifth birthday.’ That's what Fluffy's guarding on the third floor! That's what's under the trap door- the Sorcerer's Stone! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut – exterior - night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut – interior - night HARRY: Hagrid! HAGRID: Oh, hello. I don't wish to be rude, but I'm in no fit state to entertain today. HARRY, RON, HERMIONE: We know about the Sorcerer's Stone! HAGRID: Oh. HARRY: We think Snape's trying to steal it. HAGRID: Snape? Blimey, you're not still on abou’ him, are you? HARRY: Hagrid! We know he's after the Stone, we just don't know why! HAGRID: Snape is one of the teachers protectin’ the Stone! He's not abou’ to steal it. HARRY: What? HAGRID: You heard. Right. Come on, now, I'm a bit preoccupied today. HARRY: Wait a minute! ‘One of the teachers?’ HERMIONE: Of course! There are other things defending the Stone, aren't there? Spells, enchantments? HAGRID: That’s right. Waste of bloody time, if you ask me. Ain't no one gonna get past Fluffy. Heh, heh... Ain't a soul knows how, ‘cept fer me and Dumbledore. I shouldn't have told you that. I should not have told you that. Ooh, ooh... Ow... Oooh... Ooh, ooh... HARRY: Hagrid, what exactly is that? HAGRID: That? It's ah... it's um... RON: I know what that is! But Hagrid, how did you get one? HAGRID: I won it! Off a stranger I met down at the pub. Seemed quite glad to be rid of it, as a matter o’ fact. HERMIONE: Is that... a dragon? RON: That's not just a dragon! That's a Norwegian Ridgeback! My brother Charlie works with these in Romania. HAGRID: Isn't he beau’iful? Oh, bless him. Look, he knows his mummy! Hello, Norbert! HARRY: Norbert? HAGRID: Yeah, well, he's gotta have a name, don' he? Don't you, Norbert? Te de de de de! Oh! Woah! Oooh, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo! He'll have to be trained up a bit, of course. Who's that? HARRY: Malfoy! HAGRID: Oh, dear. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - night HARRY: Hagrid always wanted a dragon. He told me so the first time I ever met him. RON: It's crazy! And worse, Malfoy knows. HERMIONE: I don't understand. Is that bad? RON: It's bad. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Good evening. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Transfiguration classroom - night PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Nothing, I repeat nothing, gives a student the right to walk about the school at night. Therefore, as punishment for your actions, fifty points will be taken. HARRY: Fifty! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Each. And to ensure it doesn't happen again, all four of you will receive detention. DRACO: Excuse me, Professor. Perhaps I heard you wrong. I thought you said, ‘the four of us.’ PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: No, you heard me correctly, Mr. Malfoy. You see, honorable as your intentions were, you, too, were out of bed after hours. You will join you classmates in detention. -- Scene 25: Forbidden Forest. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - night FILCH: A pity they let the old punishments go, eh? There was a time detention would find you hanging by your thumbs in the dungeons. God, I'll miss the screaming. You'll be serving detention with Hagrid tonight. He's got a little job to do...inside the Dark Forest. A sorry lot, this, Hagrid. Oh, good God, man, you're not still on about that bloody dragon, are ya? HAGRID: Norbert's gone. Dumbledore sent him off to Romania to live in a colony. HERMIONE: Well, that's good isn't it? He'll be with his own kind. HAGRID: Yeah, but what if he don't like Romania? What if the other dragons are mean to ‘im? He's only a baby, after all. FILCH: Oh, for God's sake, pull yourself together, man. You're going into the Forest, after all. Got to have your wits about ya... DRACO: The Forest? I thought that was a joke. We can't go in there. Students aren't allowed. And there are... werewolves! FILCH: Ah, there's more than werewolves in those trees, lad. You can be sure of that. Nighty-night. HAGRID: Right. Let's go. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Dark Forest - night HARRY: Hagrid, what is that? HAGRID: What we're here for. See that? That's unicorn blood, that is. I found one dead, a few weeks ago. Now, this one's been hurt bad by somethin’. So, it's our job to go and find the poor beast. Ron, Hermione, you'll come with me... RON: Okay... HAGRID: And, Harry, you'll go with Malfoy. DRACO: Okay, then I get Fang! HAGRID: Fine. Jus’ so‘s you know, he's a bloody coward. DRACO: You wait till my father hears about this! This is servant stuff. HARRY: If I didn't know better, Draco, I'd say you were scared. DRACO: Scared, Potter? Did you hear that? HARRY: Come on, Fang! DRACO: Scared! FANG: Grrrr... HARRY: What is it, Fang? DRACO: Ahhhhh! Ah! Ah! ...Ahhh! Ahh! FIRENZE: Harry Potter, you must leave. You are known to many creatures here. The Forest is not safe at this time. Especially for you. HARRY: But, what was that thing you saved me from? FIRENZE: A monstrous creature. It is a terrible crime to slay a unicorn. Drinking the blood of a unicorn will keep you alive even if you are an inch from death, but at a terrible price. For you have slain something so pure, that from the moment the blood touches your lips, you will have a half-life, a cursed life. HARRY: But, who would choose such a life? FIRENZE: Can you think of no one? HARRY: You mean to say, that that thing that killed the unicorn, that was drinking its blood, that was Voldemort? FIRENZE: Do you know what is hidden in the school at this very moment, Mr. Potter? HARRY: The Sorcerer's Stone! FANG: Ruff! Ruff! HERMIONE: Harry! HAGRID: Hello there, Firenze. I see you've met our young Mr. Potter. You all right there, Harry? FIRENZE: Harry Potter, this is where I leave you. You’re safe now. Good luck. -- Scene 26: Up to Something. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room - night HERMIONE: You mean, You-Know-Who is out there, right now, in the Forest? HARRY: But he's weak. He's living off of unicorns. Don't you see? We had it wrong! Snape doesn't want the Stone for himself. He wants the Stone for Voldemort. With the Elixir of Life, Voldemort will be strong again. He’ll... he'll come back. RON: But, if he comes back, you don't think he'll try to... kill you, do you? HARRY: I think if he’d had his chance he might have tried to kill me tonight. RON: (Gulp) And to think, I've been worrying about my Potions final. HERMIONE: Hang on a minute. We're forgetting one thing. Who's the one wizard Voldemort always feared? Dumbledore! As long as Dumbledore's around, Harry, you're safe. As long as Dumbledore's around, you can't be touched. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – outside - daytime HERMIONE: I'd always heard Hogwart’s end-of-year exams were frightful, but I’ve found they're rather enjoyable. RON: Speak for yourself. All right there, Harry? HARRY: My scar. It keeps burning. HERMIONE: It's happened before... HARRY: Not like this. RON: Perhaps you should see the nurse. HARRY: I think it's a warning. It means danger's coming. Ah... Oh! Of course! HERMIONE: What is it? HARRY: Don't you think it's a bit odd that what Hagrid wants more than anything is a dragon, and a stranger turns up who just happens to have one? I mean, how many people wander around with dragon eggs in their pocket? Why didn't I see it before? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut - exterior - daytime HARRY: Hagrid, who gave you the dragon egg? What did he look like? HAGRID: I dunno. I never saw his face. He kept his hood up. HARRY: This stranger though, you and he must have talked. HAGRID: Well, he- he wanted to know what sort of creatures I looked after. I told him, I said, after Fluffy a dragon's gonna be no problem. HARRY: Did he seem interested in Fluffy? HAGRID: Well, o’ course he was interested in Fluffy! How often do you come across a three-headed dog, even if you're in the trade? But I told ‘im, I said, I said, ‘The trick with any beast is to know how to calm ‘im. Take Fluffy, for example, just play him a bit o’ music, and he falls straight to sleep.’ I shouldn't have told you that. Where are you going? Where are you-? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Transfiguration classroom - daytime HARRY: We have to see Professor Dumbledore, immediately! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: I’m afraid Professor Dumbledore is not here. He received an urgent owl from the Ministry of Magic and left immediately for London. HARRY: He’s gone! Now! But, this is important! This is about the Sorcerer’s Stone! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: How do you know-? HARRY: Someone’s going to try to steal it! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: I don’t know how you three found out about the Stone, but I assure you it is perfectly well protected. Now, would you go back to your dormitories, quietly. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – hallway - daytime HARRY: That was no stranger Hagrid met in the village. It was Snape. Which means, he knows how to get past Fluffy. HERMIONE: And with Dumbledore goneSNAPE: Good afternoon. Now, what would three young Gryffindors, such as yourselves, be doing inside on a day like this? HERMIONE: Ah, w- w- w... we- we were justSNAPE: You ought to be careful. People will think you’re... up to something. HERMIONE: Now, what do we do? HARRY: We go down the trap door, tonight. -- Scene 27: Through the Trapdoor. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room - night HARRY: Trevor. RON: Trevor! Shhh, go! You shouldn’t be here! NEVILLE: Neither should you! You’re sneaking out again, aren’t you? HARRY: Now, Neville, listen. We were- we wereNEVILLE: No! I won’t let you! You’ll get Gryffindor into trouble again! I-II- I’ll fight you! HERMIONE: Neville, I’m really, really sorry about this. Petrificus Totalus! RON: (Gulp) You’re a little scary sometimes, you know that. Brilliant, but scary. HARRY: Let’s go. HARRY: Sorry. HERMIONE: Sorry. RON: It’s for your own good, you know. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – third floor corridor - night HERMIONE: Ow! You stood on my foot! RON: Sorry. HERMIONE: Alohomora. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – trapdoor room - night RON: Wait a minute! He’s... snoring. HARRY: Snape’s already been here. He’s put a spell on the harp. RON: Ugh! He’s got horrible breath. HARRY: We have to move its paw. RON: What? HARRY: Come on! Okay, push! I’ll go first. Don’t follow until I give you a sign. If something bad happens, get yourselves out! Does it seem a bit...quiet to you? HERMIONE: The harp... it stopped playing. RON: Ugh! Yuck! Ugh! HARRY: Jump! FLUFFY: Woof! Woof! Woof! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Devil’s Snare room - dark RON: Waaah! Woah! Lucky this plant thing’s here, really! Woah! HERMIONE: Stop moving, both of you! This is Devil’s Snare. You have to relax! If you don’t, it’ll only kill you faster! RON: Kill us faster? Oh, now I can relax! RON, HARRY: Hermione! RON: Now what are we going to do? HERMIONE: Just relax! HARRY: Hermione, where are you? HERMIONE: Do what I say! Trust me! RON: Ahhh! Harry! Harry! HERMIONE: Are you okay? HARRY: Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. RON: Help! HERMIONE: He’s not relaxing is he? RON: Help! HARRY: Apparently not. RON: Help me! HERMIONE: We’ve got to do something! RON: Help! HARRY: What? HERMIONE: I remember reading something in Herbology. RON: Help! HERMIONE: Umm... RON: Help! HERMIONE: ‘Devil’s Snare, Devil’s Snare, it’s deadly fun; but will sulk in the sun.’ That’s it! Devil’s Snare hates sunlight! Lumus solem! RON: Aaahh! HARRY: Ron, are you okay? RON: Yeah. HARRY: OK. RON: Whew! Lucky we didn’t panic! HARRY: Lucky Hermione pays attention in Herbology. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – outside Flying Keys room - dark HERMIONE: What is that? HARRY: I don’t know. Sounds like wings. -- Scene 28: Wizard’s Chess. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Flying keys room - dark HERMIONE: Curious, I’ve never seen birds like these! HARRY: They’re not birds, they’re keys. And I’ll bet one of them fits that door. HERMIONE: What’s this all about? HARRY: I don’t know. Strange... RON: Alohomora! Well, it was worth a try. HERMIONE: Urrgh! What are we going to do? There must be a thousand keys up there! RON: We’re looking for a big old fashioned one. Probably rusty, like the handle. HARRY: There! I see it! The one with the broken wing! HERMIONE: What’s wrong, Harry? HARRY: It’s too simple. RON: Oh, go on Harry! If Snape can catch it on that old broomstick, you can! You’re the youngest Seeker in a century! This complicates things a bit! HARRY: Catch the key! RON: Hurry up! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – giant Wizard’s Chess room - dark HERMIONE: I don’t like this. I don’t like this at all. HARRY: Where are we? A graveyard? RON: This is no graveyard. Huhh... it’s a chessboard. -- LOCATION: giant Wizard’s Chess room - lit HARRY: There’s the door! HERMIONE: Now what do we do? RON: It’s obvious, isn’t it? We’ve got to play our way across the room. All right... Harry, you take the empty bishop’s square. Hermione, you’ll be the queen-side castle. As for me, I’ll be a knight. HERMIONE: What happens now? RON: Well, white moves first, and then... we play. HERMIONE: Ron, you don’t suppose this is going to be like... real wizard’s chess do you? RON: You there D-5. Yes, Hermione, I think this is gonna be... exactly like wizard chess. Castle to E-4! Pawn to C-3! -- Scene 29: Sacrifice Play. LOCATION: Hogwarts – giant Wizard’s Chess room – lit - later HARRY: Wait a minute. RON: You understand, right, Harry? Once I make my move, the queen will take me. Then you’re free to check the king. HARRY: No. Ron, no! HERMIONE: What is it? HARRY: He’s going to sacrifice himself! HERMIONE: No, you can’t! There must be another way! RON: Do you wanna stop Snape from getting’ that Stone, or not? Harry, it’s you that has to go on. I know it! Not me. Not Hermione. You! Knight to H-3. Check. Ahh! HERMIONE: Ron! HARRY: No! Don’t move! Don’t forget, we’re still playing! Checkmate! Take care of Ron, then go to the owlery. Send a message to Dumbledore. Ron’s right. I have to go on. HERMIONE: You’ll be okay, Harry. You’re a great wizard. You really are. HARRY: Not as good as you. HERMIONE: Heh! Me? Books and cleverness. There are more important things. Friendship and bravery. And, Harry, just be careful. -- Scene 30: Man with Two Faces. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Mirror of Erised room - dark HARRY: Ah...You? N-no, it can’t be! Snape - he wa- he was the onePROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Yes, he does seem the type, doesn’t he? Why next to him, who would suspect “p- p- poor st- st- stuttering Professor Quirrell?” HARRY: But- but that day, during the Quidditch match, Snape tried to kill me. PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: No, dear boy, I tried to kill you! And trust me, if Snape’s cloak hadn’t caught on fire and broken my eye contact, I would have succeeded, even with Snape muttering his little counter-curse. HARRY: Snape was trying to save me? PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: I knew you were a danger to me right from the off. Especially after Halloween. HARRY: Then- then you let the troll in! PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Very good, Potter, yes. Snape, unfortunately, wasn’t fooled. When everyone else was running about the dungeon, Snape went to the third floor to head me off. He, of course, never trusted me again. He rarely left me alone. But, he doesn’t understand. I’m never alone. Never. Now, what does this mirror do? I see what I desire. I see myself holding the Stone. But, how do I get it? VOLDEMORT: Use the boy. PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Come here, Potter! Now! Tell me... what do you see? What is it, what do you see? HARRY: I- I’m shaking hands with Dumbledore. I- I’ve won the House Cup. VOLDEMORT: He lies. PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Tell the truth! What do you see? VOLDEMORT: Let me speak to him. PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Master, you are not strong enough! VOLDEMORT:I have strength enough for thisss. Harry Potter, we meet again. HARRY: Voldemort? VOLDEMORT: Yes. You see what I have become? See what I must do to survive? Live off another. A mere parasite! Unicorn blood can sustain me, but it cannot give me a body of my own. But there is something that can. Something, that conveniently enough, lies in your pocket. -- Scene 31: Magic Touch. VOLDEMORT: Stop him! Don’t be a fool! Why suffer a horrific death when you can join me... and live? HARRY: Never! VOLDEMORT: Ha, ha ha! Bravery. Your parents had it, too. Tell me, Harry, would you like to see your mother and father again? Together we can bring them back. All I ask is for something in return. That’s it, Harry. There is no good and evil. There is only power, and those too weak to seek it. Together we'll do extraordinary things. Just give me the Stone! HARRY: You liar! VOLDEMORT: Kill him! PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Ahh! Ahh-aaah! What is this magic? VOLDEMORT: Fool! Get the Stone! PROFESSOR QUIRRELL: Ah! Ah-aaaaahhhh! VOLDEMORT: Arrgh! HARRY: Aaaah! --Scene 32: Mark of Love. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital Wing – daytime DUMBLEDORE: Good afternoon, Harry. Ah! Tokens from your admirers. HARRY: Admirers? DUMBLEDORE: What happened down in the dungeons between you and Professor Quirrell is a complete secret. So, naturally, the whole school knows. Ahh, I see that your friend Ronald has saved you the trouble of opening your Chocolate Frogs. HARRY: Ron was here? Is he all right? What about Hermione? DUMBLEDORE: Fine. They're both just fine. HARRY: But, what happened to the Stone? DUMBLEDORE: Relax, dear boy. The Stone has been destroyed. My friend Nicholas and I have had a little chat, and agreed it was best all around. HARRY: But then, Flamel- he'll die won't he? DUMBLEDORE: He has enough Elixir to set his affairs in order. But yes, he will die. HARRY: How is it I got the Stone, sir? One minute, I was there staring in the mirror, and then the nextDUMBLEDORE: Ah, you see, only a person who wanted to find the Stone- find it, but not use it- would be able to get it. That is one of my more brilliant ideas. And, between you and me, that is saying something. HARRY: Does that mean- with the Stone gone, that is- that Voldemort can never come back? DUMBLEDORE: Ah, I'm afraid... there are ways in which he can return. Harry, do you know why Professor Quirrell couldn't bear to have you touch him? It was because of your mother. She sacrificed herself for you, and that kind of act leaves a mark. Oh, no- this kind of mark cannot be seen. It lives in your very skin. HARRY: What is it? DUMBLEDORE: Love, Harry. Love. Ah, Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. I was most unfortunate in my youth to come across a vomit-flavored one, and since then, I'm afraid I've lost my liking for them. But, I think I could be safe with a nice toffee. Hmm... Alas! Earwax! -- Scene 33: House Cup Winner. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - daytime HARRY: Alright there, Ron? RON: Alright. You? HARRY: Alright. Hermione? HERMIONE: Never better. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - decorated for Leaving Feast - night DUMBLEDORE: Another year gone. And now, as I understand it, the House Cup needs awarding. And the points stand as thus: In fourth place, Gryffindor with three hundred and twelve points. Third place, Hufflepuff with three hundred and fifty-two points. In second place, Ravenclaw with four hundred and twenty-six points. And in first place, with four hundred and seventy-two points, Slytherin House. SLYTHERINS: Yeah! Yeah! DRACO: Nice one, mate. DUMBLEDORE: Yes, yes. Well done, Slytherin. Well done, Slytherin. However, recent events must be taken into account. And, I have a few last-minute points to award. To Miss Hermione Granger, for the cool use of intellect when others were in grave peril, fifty points. GRYFFINDORS: Yeah! HARRY: Good job! DUMBLEDORE: Second, to Mr. Ronald Weasley, for the best-played game of chess that Hogwarts has seen these many years, fifty points. GRYFFINDORS: Yeah! DUMBLEDORE: And third, to Mr. Harry Potter, for pure nerve and outstanding courage, I award Gryffindor House sixty points. GRYFFINDORS: Yeah! Yeah! HERMIONE: We're tied with Slytherin! DUMBLEDORE: And finally, it takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to your enemies. But, a great deal more to stand up to your friends. I award ten points to Neville Longbottom. GRYFFINDORS: Yeah! Whoo! Whoo-hoo! DUMBLEDORE: Assuming my calculations are correct, I believe that a change of decoration is in order. Gryffindor wins the House Cup! GRYFFINDORS: Yeah! Whoo! Yeah! HAGRID: Yes! LEE JORDAN: We did it! SEAMUS: We won! LEE JORDAN: We won! - Scene 34: Not Really Going Home. -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - train platform - daytime HAGRID: Come on, now. Hurry up! You'll be late! Train's leaving. Go on. Go on. Come on, hurry up! HERMIONE: Come on, Harry! HARRY: One minute. HAGRID: Thought you were leaving without sayin’ good-bye, did ya? This is for you. HARRY: Thanks, Hagrid. HAGRID: Oh, go on. On with you. On with you, now. On with you. Oh, and listen, Harry. If that dolt of a cousin o’ yours, Dudley, gives you any grief, you can always, um... threaten ‘im, with a nice pair of ears to go with that tail o’ his. HARRY: But Hagrid, we're not allowed to do magic away from Hogwarts. You know that. HAGRID: I do. But, your cousin don't, do he? Eh? Uh. Aye! HERMIONE: Feels strange to be going home, doesn't it? HARRY: I'm not going home. Not really. -- Scene 35: End Credits. -The End-

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets -- Scene 1: In a cage. -- LOCATION: Little Whinging, Surrey – night -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Harry’s room - night HARRY: I can’t let you out, Hedwig. I’m not allowed to use magic outside of school. Besides, if Uncle VernonUNCLE VERNON: Harry Potter! HARRY: Now you’ve done it. AUNT PETUNIA: He’s in there. Vernon... UNCLE VERNON: I’m warning you, if you can’t control that bloody bird it’ll have to go. HARRY: But she’s bored! If I could only let out for an hour or twoUNCLE VERNON: Huh, huh! So you could send secret messages to you freaky little friends. No, sir! HARRY: But I haven’t had any messages from any of my friends... not one... all summer. DUDLEY: Who’d want to be friends with you? UNCLE VERNON: I should think you’d be a little more grateful. We’ve raised you since you were a baby, given you the food off our table, even let you have Dudley’s second bedroom, purely out of the goodness of our hearts. AUNT PETUNIA: Not now, Bopkins. For when the Masons arrive. UNCLE VERNON: Which should be any minute! Ahem...Now let’s go over our schedule once again, shall we? Petunia when the Masons arrive you will be...? AUNT PETUNIA: ...in the lounge, waiting to welcome them graciously into our home. UNCLE VERNON: Good! And- and Dudley, you will be...? DUDLEY: I’ll be waiting to open the door! UNCLE VERNON: Excellent! ...And you...? HARRY: I’ll be in my bedroom, making no noise and pretending that I don’t exist. UNCLE VERNON: Too right, you will. With any luck, this could well be the day I make the biggest deal of my career. And you will not mess it up! -- Scene 2: Dobby’s warning. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Harry’s room - night (Ding-dong!) UNCLE VERNON: Mr. and Mrs. Mason! Do come in! DOBBY: Ha- ha- ha! Ha, ha! Ho, ho, ho! Ha, ha! Harry Potter! Such an honor it is! HARRY: Who are you? DOBBY: Dobby sir, Dobby the house elf. HARRY: Not to be to be rude or anything, but this isn’t a great time for me to have a house elf in my bedroom. DOBBY: Oh, oh yes, sir! Dobby understands! It’s just that, Dobby has come to tell you- it is difficult, sir- Dobby wonders where to begin? HARRY: Why don’t you sit down? DOBBY: S-sit down? S-sit- sit down? Oh, oh, ho. Oh, ho, ho... Oh, ho, ho. Ohh, ho, hoo... HARRY: Dobby, ssh! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to offend you, or anything. DOBBY: Offend Dobby? Dobby has heard of your greatness, sir, but never has he been asked to sit down by a wizard, like an equal. HARRY: You can’t have met many decent wizards then. DOBBY: No, I haven’t. That was an awful thing to say. Bad Dobby! HARRY: Stop, Dobby! DOBBY: Bad Dobby! HARRY: Dobby, shh! DOBBY: Baaad Dobby! HARRY: Dobby, please stop! -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Living room - night UNCLE VERNON: Ohh, don’t mind that! It’s just the cat. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Harry’s room - night DOBBY: Bad Dobby. Bad Dobby! HARRY: Stop! Stop, Dobby. Please be quiet! Are you all right? DOBBY: Dobby had to punish himself, sir. Dobby almost spoke ill of his family, sir. HARRY: Your family? DOBBY: The wizard family Dobby serves, sir. Dobby is bound to serve one family forever. If they ever knew Dobby was here...ooh... But Dobby had to come. Dobby has to protect Harry Potter- to warn him. Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry this year! There is a plot, a plot to make most terrible things happen. HARRY: What terrible things? Who’s plotting them? DOBBY: Ooo... er... can’t... say... argh... HARRY: Ok– I- understand. You can’t- say. DOBBY: Don’t make me talk, I— Errr... HARRY: Dobby! Dobby, put the lamp down. DOBBY: Bad Dobby. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Living room - night UNCLE VERNON: So when they arrive at the ninth hole... -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Harry’s room HARRY: Give me the lamp! Dobby stop! DOBBY: Let me go! HARRY: Get in there, and keep quiet! UNCLE VERNON: What the devil are you doing up here? HARRY: I- I was just— UNCLE VERNON: You just ruined the punch line of my Japanese golfer joke! HARRY: Sorry. UNCLE VERNON: One more sound, and you’ll wish you’d never been born, boy! And fix that door! HARRY: Yes, sir... See why I’ve got to go back? I don’t belong here. I belong in your world, at Hogwarts. It’s the only place I’ve got friends! DOBBY: Friends who don’t even write to Harry Potter? HARRY: Well, I expect they’ve... been- hang on- how do you know my friends haven’t been writing to me? DOBBY: Harry Potter mustn’t be angry with Dobby. Heh- Dobby hoped, if Harry Potter thought his friends had forgotten him, Harry Potter might not want to go back to school, sir. HARRY: Give me those, now! DOBBY: No! Ahh! Ooh... -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Kitchen - night HARRY: Dobby, get back here! DOBBY: (Snap!) HARRY: Dobby, please, no! DOBBY: Harry Potter must say he’s not going back to school! HARRY: I can’t. Hogwarts is my home! DOBBY: Then, Dobby must do it, sir, for Harry Potter’s own good. (Snap!) -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Living Room - night UNCLE VERNON: ...it spread as far as the eye could see, all over the floor of this vast building, and it was this deep. And one plumber said “Look at all that water.” A-and the second plumber said, “Yes, and that’s just the top of it!” DOBBY: (Snap!) UNCLE VERNON: I’m so sorry! It’s my nephew- he’s very disturbed. Meeting strangers upsets him. That’s why I kept him upstairs! -- Scene 3: Car rescue. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – exterior - daytime UNCLE VERNON: You’re never going back to that school. You’re never going to see those freaky friends of yours again. Never! -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Harry’s room - night RON: Hiya, Harry! HARRY: Ron! Fred. George. What are you all doing here? RON: Rescuing you, of course. Now, come on. Get your trunk!... RON: You’d better stand back. Let’s go! -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Mr. And Mrs. Dursley’s room - night AUNT PETUNIA: Oh! UNCLE VERNON: Now, what the hell’s he doing? Potter! -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Upstairs hall - night DUDLEY: Dad! What’s going on? -- LOCATION: LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – outside Harry’s room - night GEORGE: Go, go, go, go! DUDLEY: Dad, hurry up! RON: Come on. FRED: Come on. RON: Come on, Harry! Hurry up! UNCLE VERNON: Petunia, he’s escaping! HARRY: Ahh- ahh! RON: I’ve got you Harry! UNCLE VERNON: Come here! HARRY: Let go of me! UNCLE VERNON: Oh no, boy! You and that bloody pigeon aren’t going anywhere! HARRY: Get off! RON: Drive! FRED: Right. GEORGE: Right! UNCLE VERNON: No! No! No! No! Aaaah! AUNT PETUNIA & DUDLEY: Aaah! DUDLEY: Dad! UNCLE VERNON: Oh... Damn. -- LOCATION: Flying car - over Little Whinging, Surrey - night RON: By the way, Harry, Happy Birthday! -- Scene 4: The Burrow. -- LOCATION: The Burrow – exterior - morning -- LOCATION: The Burrow – Kitchen - morning FRED: Come on. Okay, come on. Shh! Shh! Ok, come on. Shh! Come on. RON: Do you think it’d be all right if we had some of this? GEORGE: Yeah, Mum would never know. RON: It’s not much, but it’s home. HARRY: I think it’s brilliant MRS. WEASLEY: Where have you been? Harry, how wonderful to see you dear. Beds empty! No note! Car gone! You could have died! You could have been seen! Of course, I don’t blame you, Harry dear. RON: They were starving him, Mum. There were bars on his window! MRS. WEASLEY: Well, you’d best hope that I don’t put bars on your window, Ronald Weasley! Come on Harry, time for a spot of breakfast. Here we are Harry. Now tuck in! That’s it. There we go. GINNY: Mum- Mummy, have you seen my jumper? MRS. WEASLEY: Yes dear. It was on the cat. HARRY: Hello. W-what did I do? RON: Ginny. She’s been talking about you all summer. A bit annoying really. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Morning, Weasleys. FRED, GEORGE, RON: Morning, Dad. MRS. WEASLEY: Morning Arthur! ARTHUR WEASLEY: What a night. Nine raids. Nine! HARRY: Raids? RON: Dad works in the Ministry of Magic, in the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office. Dad loves Muggles, thinks they’re fascinating. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Well now. Aah! And who are you? HARRY: Oh, sorry sir. I’m Harry, sir, Harry Potter. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Good Lord! Are you really? Well, Ron’s told us all about you, of course. When did he get here? MRS. WEASLEY: This morning. Your sons flew that enchanted car of yours to Surrey and back last night. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Did you really? How’d it go? Did you— FRED, GEORGE, RON, HARRY: Oh, it... MRS. WEASLEY: Arthur! ARTHUR WEASLEY: I mean...that was very wrong, indeed, boys. Very wrong of you. Now, Harry, you must know all about Muggles. Tell me, what exactly is the function of a rubber duck? HARRY: Oh, umm... MRS. WEASLEY: Well, that’ll be Errol with the post. Oh, fetch it will you Percy, please? PERCY: Errol... RON: He’s always doing that. PERCY: Oh look, it’s our Hogwarts letters. And they’ve sent us Harry’s as well. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Dumbledore must know you’re here, Harry. Doesn’t miss a trick, that man. MRS. WEASLEY: Oh, no. FRED: This lot won’t come cheap, Mum. The spell books alone are very expensive. MRS. WEASLEY: We’ll manage. There’s only one place we’re going to get all of this. Diagon Alley. -- Scene 5: To Diagon Alley. -- LOCATION: The Burrow – Kitchen - daytime MRS. WEASLEY: Right. Here we are Harry, you go first dear. RON: But Harry’s never traveled by Floo powder before, Mum. HARRY: Floo powder? MRS. WEASLEY: Oh, well you go first Ron, so that Harry can see how it’s done. Yes. In you go... That’s it. RON: Diagon Alley! MRS. WEASLEY: You see? It’s quite easy, dear. Don’t be afraid. Come on. Come on. In you go. That’s it, mind your head. That’s right. Now take your Floo powder. That’s it, very good. Now, don’t forget to speak very, very clearly. HARRY: ‘Diaganilly.’ MRS. WEASLEY: What did he say, dear? ARTHUR WEASLEY: ‘Diaganilly.’ MRS. WEASLEY: I thought he did. -- LOCATION: Knockturn Alley – Borgin and Burkes - daytime -- LOCATION: Knockturn Alley - daytime OTHER: Ah, ha-ha-ha-ha... AGED WITCH: Not lost are you, my dear? HARRY: I’m fine, thank you. I- I was just... OTHER: Come with us. We’ll help you find your way back. HARRY: No! Please! HAGRID: Harry? HARRY: Hagrid! HAGRID: What do you think you’re doing down ‘ere? Come on! -- LOCATION: Diagon Alley - daytime HAGRID: Yer a mess, Harry. Skulkin’ ‘round Knockturn Alley? Dodgy place! Don’ want no one ter see you there. People’ll think you were up to no good. HARRY: I was lost, I— hang on. What were you doing down there, then? HAGRID: Me? Oh, I was... um... I was lookin’ for Flesh-Eatin’ Slug Repellent. They’re ruinin’ all the school cabbages. HERMIONE: Harry! Hagrid! HAGRID: Hello, Hermione! HERMIONE: Oh, it’s so good to see you! HARRY: Well, it’s great to see you, too! HERMIONE: What did you do to your glasses? Oculus reparo. HARRY: I definitely need to remember that one. HAGRID: You’ll be all right now then, Harry? Right. I’ll leave you to it, then. HERMIONE: Ok! Bye! HARRY: Thank you. Bye. HERMIONE: Come on! Everyone’s been so worried. -- Scene 6: Flourish and Blotts. -- LOCATION: Diagon Alley – Flourish and Blotts - daytime OTHER: Harry... Harry Potter... MRS. WEASLEY: Oh, Harry! Thank goodness! We’d hoped you’d only gone one grate too far... OTHER: Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Gilderoy Lockhart. MRS. WEASLEY: Ah! Here he is! RON: Mum fancies him. PHOTOGRAPHER: Make way there. Please! Let me by, madam. Thank you. Excuse me, little girl. This is for the Daily Prophet. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: It can’t be- Harry Potter? PHOTOGRAPHER: Harry Potter! Excuse me, madam. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Nice big smile, Harry. Together you and I rate the front page! Ladies and gentlemen, what an extraordinary moment this is. When young Harry stepped into Flourish and Blotts this morning to purchase my autobiography, Magical Me,... which, incidentally is currently celebrating its 27th week atop the Daily Prophet bestseller list, he had no idea that he would, in fact, be leaving... with my entire collected works, free of charge. Now, ladies? MRS. WEASLEY: Harry, now you give me those, and I’ll get them signed. All of you wait outside. That’s it, Ron. DRACO: I’ll bet you loved that, didn’t you, Potter? Famous Harry Potter! Can’t even go into a bookshop without making the front page. GINNY: Leave him alone. DRACO: Oh look, Potter. You’ve got yourself a girlfriend. LUCIUS MALFOY: Now, now Draco, play nicely. Mr. Potter... Lucius Malfoy. We meet at last. Forgive me, your scar is legend, as, of course, is the wizard who gave it to you. HARRY: Voldemort killed my parents. He was nothing more than a murderer. LUCIUS MALFOY: Hmm. You must be very brave, to mention his name...or very foolish. HERMIONE: Fear of a name only increase fear of the thing itself. LUCIUS MALFOY: And you must be... Miss Granger. Yes, Draco’s told me all about you, and your parents. Muggles, aren’t they? Let me see...red hair... vacant expressions... tatty second hand book. You must be the Weasleys. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Children, it’s mad in here! Let’s go outside. LUCIUS MALFOY: Well, well, well. Weasley senior. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Lucius. LUCIUS MALFOY: Busy time at the Ministry, Arthur, all those extra raids? I do hope they’re paying you overtime, but judging by the state of this, I’d say not. What’s the use in being a disgrace to the name of wizard if they don’t even pay you well for it. ARTHUR WEASLEY: We have a very different idea about what disgraces the name of wizard, Malfoy. LUCIUS MALFOY: Clearly. Associating with Muggles... and I thought your family could sink no lower. I’ll see you at work. DRACO: See you at school. -- Scene 7: Flying to Hogwarts. -- LOCATION: London - King’s Cross Station – exterior -daytime -- LOCATION: King’s Cross Station - Train Platform - daytime ARTHUR WEASLEY: 10:58! Come on! Come on! MRS. WEASLEY: The train will be leaving any moment! ARTHUR WEASLEY: Fred, George, Percy you first! MRS. WEASLEY: Okay. ARTHUR WEASLEY: After you, dear. -- LOCATION: Platform nine and three-quarters - daytime MRS. WEASLEY: Come on, Ginny, we’ll get you a seat. Hurry! -- LOCATION: King’s Cross Station - Train Platform - daytime HARRY: Let’s go. HARRY: Aah! RON: Whao! STATION GUARD: Oy! What do you two think you’re doing? HARRY: Sorry. Lost- lost control of the trolley. Why can’t we get through? RON: I don’t know. The gateway’s sealed its self for some reason. HARRY: The train leaves at exactly eleven o’clock. We’ve missed it! RON: Harry, if we can’t get through, maybe Mum and Dad can’t get back! HARRY: Maybe we should just go and wait by the car. RON: The car... -- LOCATION: King’s Cross Station – exterior - daytime -- LOCATION: Flying Car – over London - daytime HARRY: Ron, I should tell you, most Muggles aren’t accustomed to seeing a flying car. RON: Uh, right. Okay. -- LOCATION: Flying Car – over countryside - daytime RON: Oh no! The Invisibility Booster must be faulty! HARRY: Well come on, then. Let’s go lower. We need to find the train. RON: Okay. -- LOCATION: Flying Car – over train tracks - daytime HARRY: Now all we need to do is catch up with the train. RON: We can’t be far behind. HARRY: Do you hear that? RON: We must be gettin’ close. HARRY: Hold on... HARRY, RON: Aaahhh! Aaahhhh! Aaahhh! HARRY: Wha-aahhh! RON: Harry! Hold on! Take my hand! Hold on! HARRY: I’m trying. Your hand’s all sweaty. HARRY: I think we found the train. RON: Yeah. -- Scene 8: Whomping Willow. -- LOCATION: Flying Car – over Hogwarts - night RON: Welcome home. HARRY: Up! Up! RON: It’s not working! Ahhhh! HARRY: Up! Up! Ron! Mind that tree! RON: Stop! Stop! Stop! Huh... Aahh! HARRY: Ahh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds – in Whomping Willow - night RON: Ahh-ha-ha! My wand. Look at my wand. HARRY: Be thankful it’s not your neck. RON: What’s happening? HARRY: I don’t know. WHOMPING WILLOW: Argg! HARRY, RON: Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! RON: Ahh! Ahhhh! Ahh! HARRY, RON: Aaaahhhh! HARRY: Come on! Go! Fast! HARRY, RON: Ahh! RON: Scabbers, you OK? The car! ...Dad’s gonna kill me. -- Scene 9: Not expelled…today. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – staircase - night HARRY: See you, Hedwig. So, a house elf shows up in my bedroom, we can’t get through the barrier to platform nine and three-quarters, we almost get killed by a tree... clearly someone doesn’t want me here this year. FILCH: Well, take a good look lads. This night might well be the last you spend in this castle. Hm. Oh, dear, we are in trouble. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Snape’s office - night SNAPE: You were seen by no less than seven Muggles. Do you have any idea how serious this is? You have risked the exposure of our world. Not to mention the damage you inflicted on a Whomping Willow that’s been on these grounds since before you were born. RON: Honestly, Professor Snape, I think it did more damage to us. SNAPE: Silence! I assure you, that were you in Slytherin, and your fate rested with me, the both of you would be on the train home- tonight. As it is... DUMBLEDORE: ...They are not. HARRY: Professor Dumbledore. Professor McGonagall. SNAPE: Headmaster, these boys have flouted the Decree for the Restriction of Underage Wizardry. As such-- DUMBLEDORE: I am well aware of our bylaws, Severus, having written quite a few of them myself. However, as head of Gryffindor house, it is for Professor McGonagall to determine the appropriate action. RON: We’ll go and get our stuff, then. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: What are you talking about, Mr. Weasley? RON: You’re going to expel us, aren’t you? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Not today, Mr. Weasley. But, I must impress on both of you the seriousness of what you have done. I will be writing to your families tonight, and you will both receive detention. -- Scene 10: Mandrakes; Ron’s Howler. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Greenhouse three - daytime PROFESSOR SPROUT: Morning, everyone! Good morning, everyone! All: Good morning, Professor Sprout! PROFESSOR SPROUT: Welcome to Greenhouse Three, Second Years. Now, gather around, everyone. Today, we are going to repot Mandrakes. Who here can tell me the properties of the Mandrake root? Yes, Miss Granger. HERMIONE: Mandrake, or Mandragora, is used to return those who have been Petrified to their original state. It’s also quite dangerous. The Mandrake’s cry is fatal to anyone who hears it. PROFESSOR SPROUT: Excellent! Ten points to Gryffindor! Now, as our Mandrakes are still only seedlings their cries won’t kill you yet. But they could knock you out for several hours, which is why I have given each of you a pair of earmuffs for auditory protection. So, could you please put them on, right away? Quickly! Flaps tight down, and watch me closely. You grasp your Mandrake firmly, you pull it sharply up out of the pot... All: Aah! Ooh! PROFESSOR SPROUT: Got it? And... now you dunk it down into the other pot and pour a little sprinkling of soil to keep him warm. NEVILLE: Uhh... PROFESSOR SPROUT: Uh, Longbottom’s been neglecting his earmuffs. SEAMUS: No, ma’am, he’s just fainted. PROFESSOR SPROUT: Yes, well, just leave him there. Right! On we go! Plenty of pots to go around. Grasp your Mandrake, and pull it up! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - daytime OTHER: There’s Nearly-Headless-Nick! SIR NICHOLAS: Hello, Percy. Miss Clearwater. PERCY: Hello, Sir Nicholas! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - daytime RON: Huhh... Say it, I’m doomed. HARRY: You’re doomed. COLIN: Hi, Harry! (flash) I’m Colin Creevy! I’m in Gryffindor, too! HARRY: Oh- Hi, Colin. Nice to meet you. DEAN THOMAS: Ron? Is that your owl? OTHERS: Ha-ha... Ha, ha. RON: Bloody bird’s a menace. Oh, no! SEAMUS: Look, everyone! Weasley’s got himself a Howler! NEVILLE: Go on, Ron. I ignored one from my gran once. It was horrible. MRS. WEASLEY’S HOWLER: RONALD WEASLEY! HOW DARE YOU STEAL THAT CAR! I AM ABSOLUTLEY DISGUSTED! YOUR FATHER’S NOW FACING AN INQUIRY AT WORK, AND IT’S ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT! IF YOU PUT ANOTHER TOE OUT OF LINE, WE’LL BRING YOU STRAIGHT HOME! Oh, and Ginny, dear, congratulations on making Gryffindor. Your father and I are so proud! Thhhhbt! -- Scene 11: Gilderoy Lockhart. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – DADA classroom - daytime PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Let me introduce you to your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher... me! Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five-times winner of Witch Weekly’s Most-Charming-Smile Award- but I don’t talk about that. I didn’t get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at him. Huh, huh, huh... hee, hee... Now- be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known to wizardkind. You may find yourselves facing your worst fears in this room. Know only that no harm can befall you whilst I am here. I must ask you not to scream. It might... provoke them! SEAMUS: Cornish pixies? PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Freshly caught Cornish pixies! SEAMUS: Ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha... PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Laugh if you will, Mr. Finnigan, but pixies can be devilish tricky little blighters. Let’s see what you make of them, ha! Come on now- round them up, round them up, they’re only pixies! PIXIE: Just stay there! NEVILLE: Ah! Aaah! Aaah! Aah- aah! NEVILLE: Hey, get me down! HERMIONE: Get off me! HARRY: Stop! Stop! Hold still! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Peskipiksi pesternomi! PIXIE: Hee, hee, hee! PIXIE: Yeeee-haw! PIXIE: Wheee! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: I’ll ask you three to just nip the rest of them back into their cage! RON: What do we do now? HERMIONE: Immobulus! NEVILLE: Why is it always me? -- Scene 12: Mudbloods and murmurs. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch pitch - daytime WOOD: I spent the summer devising a whole new Quidditch program. We are gonna train earlier, harder, and longer. What- I don’t believe it! Where do you think you’re goin’, Flint? MARCUS FLINT: Quidditch practice. WOOD: I booked the pitch for Gryffindor today. MARCUS FLINT: Easy, Wood. I’ve got a note. RON: Uh-oh. I smell trouble. WOOD: “I, Professor Severus Snape, do hereby give the Slytherin team permission to practice today, owing to the need to train their new Seeker.” You’ve got a new Seeker. Who? HARRY: Malfoy? DRACO: That’s right. And that’s not all that new this year. RON: Those are Nimbus Two Thousand and Ones! How did you get those? MARCUS FLINT: A gift from Draco’s father. DRACO: You see Weasley, unlike some, my father can afford the best. HERMIONE: At least no one on the Gryffindor team had to buy their way in. They got it on pure talent. DRACO: No one asked your opinion, you filthy little Mudblood! RON: You’ll pay for that one, Malfoy. Eat slugs! OTHERS: Ha, ha, ha! DRACO: Ha, ha! HERMIONE: You okay, Ron? Say something! RON: (Blech...) OTHER: Ooh! Ugh! Yech! COLIN: (flash) Wow! Can you turn him around, Harry? HARRY: No, Colin! Get out of the way! Let’s take him to Hagrid’s. RON: (Blech...) HARRY: He’ll know what to do. OTHERS: Ha, ha, ha... DRACO: Ha, ha... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut - daytime HAGRID: Wo, this calls for a specialist’s equipment. Nothin’ to do but wait’ll it stops, I’m afraid. RON: (Blech...) HARRY: Ah! Oh... Okay. HAGRID: Better out than in. Who’s Ron tryin’ to curse, anyway? HARRY: Malfoy. He called Hermione, ...um, well, I don’t- I don’t know exactly what it means. HERMIONE: He called me a Mudblood. HAGRID: He did not! HARRY: What’s a Mudblood? HERMIONE: It means “dirty blood.” Mudblood’s a really foul name for someone who is Muggle-born. Someone with non-magic parents. Someone like me. It’s not a term one usually hears in civilized conversation. HAGRID: See, the thing is, Harry, there’re some wizards, like the Malfoy family, who think they’re better’n everyone else because they’re what people call “pure blood.” HARRY: That’s horrible! RON: (Blech...) It’s disgusting. HAGRID: And it’s codswallop, to boot. “Dirty blood.” Why, there isn’t a wizard alive today that’s not half blood or less. More ter the point, they’ve yet to think of a spell that our Hermione can’ do. Come here... Don’t you think on it, Hermione. Don’t you think on it for one minute... eh? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Professor Lockhart’s office - night PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Harry, Harry, Harry... Can you possibly imagine a better way to serve detention than by helping me to answer my fan mail? HARRY: Not really. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Fame is a fickle friend, Harry. Celebrity is as celebrity does. Remember that. VOICE: Come, come, come to me. Come to me! HARRY: What? PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Sorry? HARRY: That voice. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Voice? HARRY: Didn’t you hear it? PROFESSOR LOCKHART: What are you talking about, Harry? I think we’re getting a bit a- drowsy. And, Great Scott- no wonder! Look at the time! We’ve been here nearly four hours! Spooky how the time flies when one’s having fun. Heh, heh. HARRY: Spooky. -- Scene 13: Writing on the wall. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - night VOICE: Blood. I smell blood. Let me rip you. Let me kill you. Kill! Kill! Kill! HERMIONE: Harry! HARRY: Did you hear it? RON: Hear what? HARRY: That voice. HERMIONE: Voice? What voice? HARRY: I heard it first in Lockhart’s office. And then again just— VOICE: It’s time. HARRY: It’s moving. I think it’s going to kill. RON: Kill? HERMIONE: Harry, wait! Not so fast! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – flooded corridor – night HARRY: Strange. I’ve never seen spiders act like that. RON: I don’t like spiders... What’s that? HERMIONE: ‘The Chamber of Secrets has been opened... enemies the heir... beware.’ It’s written in blood. HARRY: Oh, no... It’s Filch’s cat. It’s Mrs. Norris. OTHERS: (mumble, mumble) Ahhh! What’s that? MADAME POMFREY: Oh! DRACO: ‘Enemies of the heir beware!’ You’ll be next, Mudbloods! FILCH: What’s going on ‘ere? Go on, make way, make way. Potter-- What are you...Mrs. Norris? You’ve...murdered my cat. HARRY: No. No. FILCH: I’ll kill ya... I’ll kill ya! DUMBLEDORE: Argus! Argus, I... Everyone will proceed to their dormitories immediately. Everyone except... you three. OTHER: Ravenclaws, follow me! DUMBLEDORE: She’s not dead, Argus. She has been Petrified. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Ah, thought so. So unlucky I wasn’t there. I know exactly the counter curse that could have spared her. DUMBLEDORE: But how she has been Petrified, I cannot say... FILCH: Ask him. It’s him who’s done it. You saw what he wrote on the wall. HARRY: It’s not true sir, I swear. I never touched Mrs. Norris. FILCH: Rubbish! SNAPE: If I might, Headmaster? Perhaps Potter and his friends were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. However, the circumstances are suspicious. I, for one, don’t recall seeing Potter at dinner. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: I’m afraid that’s my doing, Severus. You see, Harry was helping me answer my fan mail. HERMIONE: That’s why Ron and I went looking for him, Professor. We’d just found him when he said... SNAPE: Yes, Miss Granger? HARRY: When I said I wasn’t hungry. We were heading back to the common room when we found Mrs. Norris. DUMBLEDORE: Innocent until proven guilty, Severus. FILCH: My cat has been Petrified. I wanna see some punishment! DUMBLEDORE: We will be able to cure her, Argus. As I understand it, Madame Sprout has a very healthy growth of Mandrakes. When matured, a potion will be made which will revive Mrs. Norris. And in the meantime, I strongly recommend caution... to all. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – moving staircase - night HERMIONE: It’s a bit strange, isn’t it? HARRY: Strange? HERMIONE: You hear this voice, a voice only you can hear, and then Mrs. Norris turns up Petrified. It’s just... strange. HARRY: Do you think I should have told them? Dumbledore and the others, I mean? RON: Are you mad? HERMIONE: No, Harry. Even in the wizarding world, hearing voices isn’t a good sign. Picture: She’s right, you know. -- Scene 14: About the Chamber. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Transfiguration classroom - daytime PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Could I have your attention, please? Right. Now, today, we will be transforming animals into water goblets. Like so. One, two, three, Vera verto. Now it’s your turn. Well, who would like to go first? Ah! Mr. Weasley. “One, two, three. Vera verto.” RON: Ahem. Vera verto! OTHERS: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha... PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: That wand needs replacing, Mr. Weasley. Yes, Miss Granger? HERMIONE: Professor, I was wondering if you could tell us about...the Chamber of Secrets? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Well, very well. Well, you all know, of course, that Hogwarts was founded over a thousand years ago by the four greatest witches and wizards of the age: Godric Gryffindor, Helga Hufflepuff, Rowena Ravenclaw, and Salazar Slytherin. Now, three of the founders coexisted quite harmoniously. One did not. RON: Three guesses who. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Salazar Slytherin wished to be more selective about the students admitted to Hogwarts. He believed magical learning should be kept within all-magic families. In other words, “pure-bloods.” Unable to sway the others, he decided to leave the school. Now, according to legend, Slytherin had built a hidden chamber in this castle, known as the Chamber of Secrets. Though, shortly before departing, he sealed it until that time when his own true heir returned to the school. The heir alone would be able to open the Chamber and unleash the horror within, and by so doing purge the school of all those who, in Slytherin’s view, were unworthy to study magic. HERMIONE: Muggle-borns. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Well, naturally, the school had been searched many times. No such chamber has been found. HERMIONE: Professor? What exactly does legend tell us lies within the Chamber? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Well, the Chamber is said to home to something that only the Heir of Slytherin can control. It is said to be the home of a monster. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – hallway - daytime RON: D’you think it’s true? D’you think there really is a Chamber of Secrets? HERMIONE: Yes. Couldn’t you tell? McGonagall’s worried. All the teachers are. HARRY: Well, if there really is a Chamber of Secrets, a-and it really has been opened, then that means--- HERMIONE: The Heir of Slytherin has returned to Hogwarts. The question is, who is it? RON: Let’s think. Who do we know who thinks all Muggle-borns are scum? HERMIONE: If you’re talking about MalfoyRON: Of course. You heard him! ‘You’ll be next Mudbloods,’ HERMIONE: I heard him. But Malfoy, the Heir of Slytherin? HARRY: Well, maybe Ron’s right, Hermione. I mean, look at his family. The whole lot of them have been in Slytherin for centuries. RON: Crabbe and Goyle must know. Maybe we could trick them into telling. HERMIONE: Even they aren’t that thick. But there might be another way. Mind you, it would be difficult. Not to mention, we would be breaking about fifty school rules. And, it’ll be dangerous. Very dangerous. -- Scene 15: Rogue Bludger. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Library - daytime HERMIONE: Here it is. ‘The Polyjuice Potion.’ (Reading from Moste Potente Potions) ‘Properly brewed, the Polyjuice Potion allows the drinker to transform himself temporarily into the physical form of another.’ RON: Do you mean, if Harry and I drink that stuff, we’ll turn into Crabbe and Goyle? HERMIONE: Yes. RON: Wicked! Malfoy’ll tell us anything. HERMIONE: Exactly. But it’s tricky. I’ve never seen a more complicated potion. HARRY: Well, how long will it take to make? HERMIONE: A month. HARRY: A month? But, Hermione, if Malfoy is the Heir of Slytherin, he could attack half the Muggle-borns in the school by then. HERMIONE: I know. But it’s the only plan we’ve got. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – exterior – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Quidditch Pitch - daytime (Bong) OTHERS: Yeah! Come on Slytherin! LEE JORDAN: Another goal for Slytherin! They lead Gryffindor ninety to thirty! Marcus Flint: Yeah! Yeah! DRACO: All right there, Scarhead? WOOD: Watch yourself, Harry! HARRY: Wood! Look out! HAGRID: Blimey! Harry’s got himself a rogue Bludger! That’s been tampered with, that has! RON: I’ll stop it. HERMIONE: No! Even with a proper wand it’s too risky. You could hit Harry! DRACO: Training for the ballet, Potter? DRACO: You’ll never catch me, Potter! HERMIONE: Let’s go. LEE JORDAN: Harry Potter has caught the Snitch! Gryffindor wins! HERMIONE: Finite incantatem! -- Scene 16: No longer safe. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch pitch grass - daytime HARRY: Thank you. HERMIONE: Are you okay? HARRY: No, I think my- I think my arm’s broken. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Not to worry, Harry. I will fix that arm of yours straight away. HARRY: No, not you. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Oh, poor boy doesn’t know what he’s saying. Now, this... won’t hurt a bit. Brackium emendo! OTHERS: Oh! Ooh! Ugh! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Ah, yes, well, ha, that can sometimes happen, um, butuh, the point is, uh,... OTHER: Ohh! Uhh! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: ...you can no longer feel any pain, and, heh- very clearly, the bones are not broken. HAGRID: Broken? There’s no bones left! OTHERS: Uh-huh-ugh! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Much more flexible, though. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital wing - daytime DRACO: Uhh, uhhh... MADAME POMFREY: Oh, Mr. Malfoy, stop making such a fuss, you can go. Out of my way. Out of my way! Should’ve been brought straight to me. I can mend bones in a heartbeat- but growing them back... HERMIONE: You will be able to, won’t you? MADAME POMFREY: Oh, I’ll be able to, certainly. But it’ll be painful. You’re in for a rough night, Potter. Regrowing bones is a nasty business. HARRY: Ugh! MADAME POMFREY: Well, what do you expect? Pumpkin juice? HARRY: Uh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital wing - night VOICE: Kill. Kill... Time to kill! DOBBY: Hello! HARRY: Dobby? DOBBY: Harry Potter should have listened to Dobby! Harry Potter should have gone back home when he missed the train. HARRY: It was you... You stopped the barrier from letting Ron and me through. DOBBY: Indeed. Yes, sir. HARRY: You nearly got Ron and me expelled! DOBBY: At least you would be away from here. Harry Potter must go home! Dobby thought his Bludger would be enough to make Harry Potter see that--- HARRY: Your Bludger? You made that Bludger chase after me? DOBBY: Uhuh... Dobby feels most aggrieved, sir. Dobby had to iron his hands. HARRY: You’d better clear off before my bones come back, Dobby, or I might strangle you! DOBBY: Uh-huh-huh... Dobby is used to death threats sir. Dobby gets them five times a day at home. HARRY: I don’t suppose you could tell me why you’re trying to kill me? DOBBY: Not kill you, sir, never kill you! Dobby remembers how it was before Harry Potter triumphed over He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. We house elves were treated like vermin, sir. Of course, Dobby is still treated like vermin...uh, huh, huh, huh! Aah, ahh... HARRY: Why do you wear that thing Dobby? DOBBY: This, sir? It is a mark of the house-elves’ enslavement. Dobby can only be freed if his master presents him with clothes. Ah! Listen. Listen! Terrible things are about to happen at Hogwarts. Harry Potter must not stay here, now that history is to repeat itself. HARRY: Repeat itself? You mean this has happened before? DOBBY: Ah! I shouldn’t have said that! Oh! Ah! Dah! Bad Dobby! Bad! HARRY: Dobby, stop it! Stop it! Stop, Dobby! Tell me, Dobby. When did this happen before? Who’s doing it now? DOBBY: Dobby cannot say, sir. Dobby only wants Harry Potter to be safe. HARRY: No, Dobby. Tell me. Who is it? DOBBY: (Snap!) MADAME POMFREY: Put him here. What happened? DUMBLEDORE: There’s been another attack. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: I think- do ya know- I think he’s been Petrified, Madame Pomfrey. Look! Perhaps he managed to take a picture of his attacker... (Poof) PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: What can this mean, Albus? DUMBLEDORE: It means...that our students are in great danger. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: What should I tell the staff. DUMBLEDORE: The truth. Tell them Hogwarts is no longer safe. It is as we feared, Minerva. The Chamber of Secrets has indeed been opened again. -- Scene 17: Dueling Club. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Girl’s bathroom - daytime HERMIONE: Again? You mean the Chamber of Secrets has been opened before? RON: Of course. Don’t you see? Lucius Malfoy must have opened it when he was at school here. And now he’s taught Draco how to do it. HERMIONE: Maybe. We’ll have to wait for the Polyjuice Potion to know for sure. RON: Enlighten me. Why are we brewing this potion in broad daylight, in the middle of a girl’s lavatory? Don’t you think we’ll get caught? HERMIONE: Heh... No. No one ever comes in here. RON: Why? HERMIONE: Moaning Myrtle. RON: Who? HERMIONE: Moaning Myrtle. RON: Who’s Moaning Myrtle? MOANING MYRTLE: I’m Moaning Myrtle! I wouldn’t expect you to know me! Who would ever talk about ugly, miserable, moping Moaning Myrtle? Huh...aaaah! HERMIONE: She’s a little sensitive. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – set up for Dueling Club - daytime PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Gather ‘round, gather ‘round! Can everybody see me? Can you all hear me? Excellent! In light of the dark events of recent weeks, Professor Dumbledore has granted me permission to start this little Dueling Club to train you all up in case you ever need to defend yourselves, as I myself have done on countless occasions- for full details, see my published works. Let me introduce my assistant, Professor Snape. He has sportingly agreed to help me with a short demonstration. Now, I don’t want any of you youngsters to worry- you’ll still have your Potions master when I’m through with him, never fear. One, two, threeSNAPE: Expelliarmus! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Whoaah! HERMIONE: Do you think he’s all right? RON: Who cares? PROFESSOR LOCKHART: An excellent idea to show them that, Professor Snape, but if you don’t mind me saying, it was pretty obvious- ah- what you were about to do. And if I had wanted to stop you, it would have been only too easy. SNAPE: Perhaps it would be prudent to first teach the students to block unfriendly spells, Professor. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: An excellent suggestion, Professor Snape! Ah... Let’s have a volunteer pair! Um, Potter, Weasley, how about you? SNAPE: Weasley’s wand causes devastation with the simplest spells. We’ll be sending Potter to the hospital wing in a matchbox. Might I suggest someone from my own house? Malfoy, perhaps? PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Good luck, Potter. HARRY: Thank you, sir. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Wands at the ready. DRACO: Scared, Potter? HARRY: You wish. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: On the count of three, cast your charms to disarm your opponent- only to disarm. We don’t want any accidents here. One, two-- DRACO: Everte statium! HERMIONE: Oh! CRABBE: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! HARRY: Rictusempra! -- Scene 18: A Parselmouth. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: I said disarm only! DRACO: Serpensortia! SNAPE: Don’t move, Potter. I’ll get rid of it for you. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Allow me, Professor Snape. Alarte ascendare! HARRY: Sya- hassa- she. Sya- hasi- heth. Sya- hasi- heth. SNAPE: Vipera evenesca. JUSTIN FINCH-FLETCHLEY: What are you playing at? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room - daytime RON: You’re a Parselmouth? Why didn’t you tell us? HARRY: I’m a what? HERMIONE: You can talk to snakes. HARRY: I know. I mean, I accidentally set a python on my cousin Dudley at the zoo once. Uh, once! But, so what? I bet loads of people here can do it. HERMIONE: No, they can’t. It’s not a very common gift, Harry. This is bad. HARRY: What’s bad? If I hadn’t told that snake not to attack JustinRON: Oh, that’s what you said to it! HARRY: You were there! You heard me! RON: I heard you speaking Parseltongue. Snake language? HARRY: I spoke a different language? But- I didn’t realize I- how can I speak a language without knowing I can? HERMIONE: I don’t know, Harry, but it sounded like you were egging the snake on, or something. Harry, listen to me. There’s a reason the symbol of Slytherin House is a serpent. Salazar Slytherin was a Parselmouth. He could talk to snakes, too. RON: Exactly! Now the whole school’s gonna think you’re his great- greatgreat grandson, or something. HARRY: But I’m not... I can’t be. HERMIONE: He lived a thousand years ago; for all we know, you could be. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Study hall - night OTHERS: (whispering) HARRY: I’ll see you back in the common room. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - night VOICE: Blood...I want blood...They all must die. Kill... Kill... Kill! Time to kill. -- Scene 19: Nothing to tell. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – flooded corridor - night FILCH: Caught in the act! I’ll have you out this time, Potter. Mark my words. HARRY: No! Mr. Filch! Y-you- you don’t understand! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Oh! HARRY: Professor... I swear I didn’t! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: This is out of my hands, Potter. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – entrance to Dumbledore’s office - night PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Professor Dumbledore will be waiting for you. Sherbet lemon. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dumbledore’s office - night HARRY: Professor Dumbledore? SORTING HAT: Bee in your bonnet, Potter? HARRY: I... I-I was- I was just wondering if you’d put me in the right house. SORTING HAT: Yes, you were particularly difficult to place. But, I stand by what I said last year-- you would have done well in Slytherin. HARRY: You’re wrong. SORTING HAT: Umm... FAWKES: (Brrr...) (Poof) DUMBLEDORE: Harry? HARRY: Professor! Sir, your bird- there was nothing I could do- he- he just caught fire! DUMBLEDORE: Oh, and about time, too. He’s been looking dreadful for days. Pity you had to see him on a burning day. Fawkes is a phoenix, Harry. They burst into flame when it is time for them to die, and then they are reborn from the ashes. FAWKES: (Brrrt) DUMBLEDORE: Ah, fascinating creatures, phoenixes. They can carry immensely heavy loads, and their- their tears have healing powers. HAGRID: Professor Dumbledore, sir! Wait! Listen! Professor Dumbledore, sir, it wasn’t Harry! DUMBLEDORE: HagridHAGRID: In fact, I’d be prepared ter swear it in front o’ the Ministry of Magic! DUMBLEDORE: Hagrid! Relax. I do not believe that Harry attacked anyone. HAGRID: Well, of course you don’t, and... Oh... Oh, right. Well, I’ll, umhum. I’ll just wait outside, then. DUMBLEDORE: Yes. HARRY: You don’t think it was me, Professor? DUMBLEDORE: No, Harry. I do not think it was you... But I must ask you, is there something you wish to tell me? HARRY: No, sir. Nothing. DUMBLEDORE: Very well, then. Off you go. -- Scene 20: Polyjuice Potion. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – winter - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall decorated for Christmas - night HERMIONE: Everything’s set. We just need a bit of who you’re changing into. HARRY: Crabbe and Goyle. HERMIONE: We also need to make sure that the real Crabbe and Goyle can’t burst in on us while we’re interrogating Malfoy. RON: How? HERMIONE: I’ve got it all worked out. I filled these with a simple Sleeping Draught. Simple, but powerful. Now, once they’re asleep hide them in the broomstick cupboard and pull out a few of their hairs, and put on their uniforms. RON: Whose hair are you ripping out then? HERMIONE: I’ve already got mine. Millicent Bulstrode– Slytherin- I got this off her robes. I’m going to go check on the Polyjuice Potion. Make sure that Crabbe and Goyle find these. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – entrance hall - night RON: Ahem... HARRY: Ron, maybe I should do it? RON: Yeah. Right. HARRY: Wingardium leviosa. Here they come. CRABBE: It’s good right? Ah... Cool! CRABBE & GOYLE: Ummm...um. RON: How thick could you get? HARRY: Come on. Let’s get ‘em. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Girl’s bathroom - night HERMIONE: We’ll have exactly one hour before we change back into ourselves... Add the hairs. RON: Ugh- essence of Crabbe. HERMIONE: Cheers! RON: I think I’m gonna be sick! HERMIONE: Me too. HARRY: Ughh! RON (as CRABBE): Uh... Harry? HARRY (as GOYLE): Ron! RON (as CRABBE): Bloody hell! HARRY (as GOYLE): We still sound like ourselves. You need to sound more like Crabbe. RON (as CRABBE): Uh... Bloody hell. HARRY (as GOYLE): Excellent. RON (as CRABBE): But where’s Hermione? HERMIONE: I- I don’t think I’m going. You go on without me! HARRY (as GOYLE): Hermione, are you okay? HERMIONE: Just go. You’re wasting time! HARRY (as GOYLE): Come on. -- Scene 21: Harry and Ron transformed. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor to the dungeons - night HARRY (as GOYLE): I think the Slytherin common room’s this way. RON (as CRABBE): Okay. PERCY: Excuse me. RON (as CRABBE): What are you doing d- uh, I mean... What are you doing down here? PERCY: I happen to be a school prefect. You, on the other hand, have no business wandering the corridors at this time of night. What are your names again? RON (as CRABBE): Uhh... HARRY (as GOYLE): I’m... DRACO: Crabbe, Goyle! Where have you two been? Pigging out in the Great Hall all this time? Why are you wearing glasses? HARRY (as GOYLE): Ah- um... Reading. DRACO: Reading? HARRY (as GOYLE): Uh-huh. DRACO: I didn’t know you could read. And what are you doing down here, Weasley? PERCY: Mind your attitude, Malfoy. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Slytherin common room - night DRACO: Well, sit down. You’d never know the Weasleys were pure-bloods, the way they behave. They’re an embarrassment to the wizarding world. All of them. What’s wrong with you, Crabbe? RON (as CRABBE): Ahem...Stomachache. DRACO: You know, I’m surprised that the Daily Prophet hasn’t done a report on all these attacks. I suppose Dumbledore is trying to hush it all up. Father always said Dumbledore was the worst thing that ever happened to this place. HARRY (as GOYLE): You’re wrong! DRACO: What? You think there’s someone here who’s worse than Dumbledore? Well? Do you? HARRY (as GOYLE): Harry Potter? (gulp) DRACO: Good one, Goyle. You’re absolutely right. Saint Potter. And people actually think that he’s the Heir of Slytherin! HARRY (as GOYLE): But then you must have some idea who’s behind it all. DRACO: You know I don’t Goyle. I told you yesterday. How many times do I have to tell you? Is this yours? But my father did say this: It’s been fifty years since the Chamber was opened. He wouldn’t tell me who opened it-- only that they were expelled. The last time the Chamber of Secrets was opened, a Mudblood died. So, it’s only a matter of time before one of them is killed this time. As for me, I hope it’s Granger. What’s the matter with you two? You’re acting very...odd. HARRY (as GOYLE): It’s his... stomachache. Calm down. RON (as CRABBE): S- scar. HARRY (as GOYLE): Hair! DRACO: Hey! Where are you going? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Girl’s bathroom - night RON: That was close! HARRY: Hermione, come out. We’ve got loads to tell you! HERMIONE: Go away! MOANING MYRTLE: Ahh! Wait till you see. It’s awful! He- ha, ha, he- hee! HARRY: Hermione? A- are you OK? MOANING MYRTLE: Aaah! HERMIONE: Do you remember me telling you that the Polyjuice Potion was only for human transformations? It was cat’s hair I plucked off Millicent Bulstrode’s robes. Look at my face. MOANING MYRTLE: Hee, ha, ha! RON: Look at your tail! MOANING MYRTLE: Ha, ha, ha! -- Scene 22: The diary. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – stormy night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – moving staircases - night RON: Have you spoken to Hermione? HARRY: She should be out of hospital in a few days, when she stops coughing up fur balls... What’s this? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – flooded corridor - night RON: Yuck! HARRY: Looks like Moaning Myrtle’s flooded the bathroom. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – girl’s bathroom - night MOANING MYRTLE: Oooh, oooh, ooooh, huh– huh. Come to throw something else at me? HARRY: Why would I throw something at you? MOANING MYRTLE: Don’t ask me! Here I am, minding my own business, and someone thinks it’s funny to throw a book at me. RON: But, it can’t hurt if someone throws something at you. I mean, it’ll just go right through you. MOANING MYRTLE: Sure! Let’s all throw books at Myrtle because she can’t feel it! Ten points if you get through her stomach! Fifty points if it goes through her head! HARRY: But, who threw it at you, anyway? MOANING MYRTLE: I don’t know, I didn’t see them. I was just sitting in the Ubend thinking about death - aah - and it fell through the top of my head. Uhhuh. Whoo-oooh-whoooo... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor Common Room - night HARRY: ‘Tom Marvolo Riddle.’ HARRY: ‘My name is Harry Potter.’ DIARY: Hello Harry Potter, my name is Tom Riddle. HAARY: ‘Do you know anything about the Chamber of Secrets?’ DIARY: Yes. HARRY: ‘Can you tell me?’ DIARY: No. But I can show you. Let me take you back fifty years ago...13th June -- Scene 22: Tom Riddle. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – fifty years ago – corridor, staircase - night HARRY: Excuse me. Could you tell me what’s going on here? Are you Tom Riddle? Hello, can you hear me? DUMBLEDORE: Riddle! Come. TOM RIDDLE: Professor Dumbledore. HARRY: Dumbledore? DUMBLEDORE: It is not wise to be wandering around this late hour, Tom. TOM RIDDLE: Yes, Professor. I- I suppose I- I had to see for myself if the rumors were true. DUMBLEDORE: I’m afraid they are, Tom. They are true. TOM RIDDLE: About the school, as well? I don’t have a home to go to. They wouldn’t really close Hogwarts, would they Professor? DUMBLEDORE: I understand Tom, but I’m afraid Headmaster Dippet may have no choice. TOM RIDDLE: Sir- if it all stopped- if the person responsible was caught-- DUMBLEDORE: Is there something you wish to tell me? TOM RIDDLE: No, sir. Nothing. DUMBLEDORE: Very well, then. Off you go. TOM RIDDLE: Good night, sir. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – fifty years ago – corridors to dungeons - night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – fifty years ago – dungeons - night HAGRID: Let’s get yeh out of there. TOM RIDDLE: Evening, Hagrid. I’m going to have to turn you in, Hagrid. I don’t think you meant it to kill anyone, but-- HAGRID: You can’t! You don’t understand. TOM RIDDLE: The dead girl’s parents will be here tomorrow. The least Hogwarts can do is make sure the thing that killed their daughter is slaughtered. HAGRID: It wasn’t him. Aragog never killed no one! Never! TOM RIDDLE: Monsters don’t make good pets, Hagrid. Now, stand aside. HAGRID: No! TOM RIDDLE: Stand aside, Hagrid! HAGRID: No! TOM RIDDLE: Cistem aperio! Arania exumai! HAGRID: Aragog! Aragog! TOM RIDDLE: I can’t let you go. They’ll have your wand for this, Hagrid. You’ll be expelled. HARRY: Hagrid! Haagriid! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor Common Room - night HARRY: Woah! -- Scene 24: Petrified. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime HARRY: It was Hagrid. Hagrid opened the Chanter of Secrets fifty years ago. HERMIONE: It can’t be Hagrid. It just can’t be. RON: We don’t even know this Tom Riddle. He sounds like a dirty, rotten snitch to me. HARRY: The monster had killed somebody, Ron. What would any of us have done? HERMIONE: Look. Hagrid’s our friend. Why don’t we just go and ask him about it? RON: That’ll be a cheerful visit! “Hello, Hagrid! Tell us, have you been setting anything mad and hairy loose in the castle lately?” HAGRID: Mad and hairy? You wouldn’t be talking about me now, would ya? HARRY, RON, HERMIONE: No! HARRY: W- what’s that you’ve got, Hagrid? HAGRID: Oh, It’s a- Flesh-Eatin’ Slug Repellent. For the Mandrakes, ya know. Now, accordin’ to Professor Sprout, they’ve still got a bit o’ growing up to do. But, once their acne’s cleared up, we’ll be able to chop ‘em up and stew ‘em, and then we’ll get those people down at the hospital un-Petrified. In the meantime, though, you three had best be lookin’ after yourselves. All right? Hmm. HAGRID: Hello, Neville! NEVILLE: Harry- I don’t know who did it, but you’d better come! Come on! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory HERMIONE: It had to be a Gryffindor. Nobody else knows our password- unless it wasn’t a student. RON: Who ever it was, they must have been looking for something. HARRY: And they found it. Tom Riddle’s diary is gone. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch team tent - daytime WOOD: Alright, listen up. We play our game, Hufflepuff doesn’t stand a chance. We’re stronger, quicker and smarter. FRED: And not to mention, they’re dead scared that Harry’ll Petrify them if they fly anywhere near him. WOOD: Well, that too. Professor McGonagall. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: This match has been cancelled. WOOD: We can’t cancel Quidditch. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Silence, Wood. You and your teammates will go to Gryffindor Tower, now. Potter, you and I will find Mr. Weasley. There’s something the both of you have to see. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital wing - daytime PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: I warn you, this could be a wee bit of a shock. RON: Hermione! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: She was found near the Library, along with this. Does it mean anything to either of you? HARRY: No. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room - daytime PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Could I have your attention please? Because of recent events, these new rules will be put into effect immediately. “All students will return to their house common rooms by six o’clock every evening. All students will be escorted to each lesson by a teacher. No exceptions.” I should tell you this: unless the culprit behind these attacks is caught, it is likely the school will be closed. HARRY: We’ve got to talk to Hagrid, Ron. I can’t believe it’s him, but if he did set the monster loose last time, he’ll know how to get inside the Chamber of Secrets, and that’s a start. RON: But you heard McGonagall! We’re not allowed to leave the tower except for class. HARRY: I think it’s time to get my Dad’s old cloak out again. -- Scene 25: Cornelius Fudge. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut – exterior - night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut – interior - night HAGRID: Who’s there? Hello? Hello? HARRY: What’s that for? HAGRID: Oh, nothing. I- I was expecting, ah... It doesn’t matter- come on inI just made a pot o’ tea. HARRY: Hagrid, are you okay? HAGRID: I’m fine! I’m alright. HARRY: Did you hear about Hermione? HAGRID: Oh, yeah. I heard about that, all righ’. HARRY: Look, we have to ask you something. Do you know who’s opened the Chamber of Secrets? HAGRID: What you had to understand about that is— (knock, knock, knock) Quick under the cloak. Don’t say a word. Be quiet, both o’ you... Professor Dumbledore, sir! DUMBLEDORE: Good evening, Hagrid. I wonder, could we...? HAGRID: Of course! Come in! Come in. RON: That’s Dad’s boss! Cornelius Fudge, Minister of Magic! CORNELIUS FUDGE: Bad business, Hagrid. Very bad business. Had to come-- three attacks on Muggle-borns. Things have gone far enough. The Ministry’s got to act. HAGRID: Oh, but I never- you know I never, Professor! DUMBLEDORE: I want it understood, Cornelius, that Hagrid has my full confidence. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Albus look, Hagrid’s record is against him. I’ve got to take him. HAGRID: Take me? Take me where? Not Azkaban Prison? CORNELIUS FUDGE: I’m afraid we have no choice, Hagrid. LUCIUS MALFOY: Already here, Fudge? Good... HAGRID: What’re you doin’ here? Get outta my house! LUCIUS MALFOY: Believe me, I take absolutely no pleasure being inside your-- you call this a house? Huh! No. I simply called at the school, and was told the headmaster was here. DUMBLEDORE: Well, what exactly is it that you want with me? LUCIUS MALFOY: The other governors and I have decided it’s time for you to step aside. This is an order of suspension. You’ll find all twelve signatures on it. I’m afraid we feel you’ve rather lost your touch. Well, what, with all these attacks, there’ll be no Muggle-borns left at Hogwarts. I can only imagine what an awful loss that would be to the school. HAGRID: Yeh can’ take Professor Dumbledore away. Take him away, an’ the Muggle-borns won’ stand a chance! You mark my words, there’ll be killin’s next! LUCIUS MALFOY: You think so? DUMBLEDORE: Calm yourself, Hagrid. If the governors desire my removal, I will, of course, step aside. However, you will find that help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it. LUCIUS MALFOY: Admirable sentiments. Shall we? Fudge! CORNELIUS FUDGE: Come, Hagrid... Well? HAGRID: Ahem! If, uh, if anybody was looking for some stuff, then all they’d have to do would be to follow the spiders. Yup! That would lead them right! That’s all I have to say. Oh, and someone’ll need to feed Fang while I’m away. FANG: (Grrr...) CORNELIUS FUDGE: Good boy. RON: Hagrid’s right! With Dumbledore gone, there’ll be an attack a day! HARRY: Look! Well, come on. Come on, Fang! -- Scene 26: Aragog. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut – exterior - night HARRY: Come on! RON: What?! HARRY: You heard what Hagrid said; ‘Follow the spiders.’ RON: They’re headed to the Dark Forest! Why spiders! Why couldn’t it be “follow the butterflies?” -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dark Forest - night RON: Harry, I don’t like this... Harry, I don’t like this at all! HARRY: Shush! RON: Can we go back now? HARRY: Come on! ARAGOG: Who is it? HARRY: Don’t panic. ARAGOG: Hagrid? Is that you? HARRY: We’re friends of Hagrid’s. And you? Y- y-you’re Aragog aren’t you? ARAGOG: Yes. Hagrid has never sent men into our hollow before. HARRY: He’s in trouble. Up at the school, there have been attacks. They think it’s Hagrid. They think he opened the Chamber of Secrets, like before. ARAGOG: That’s a lie! Hagrid never opened the Chamber of Secrets. HARRY: Then you’re not the monster. ARAGOG: No! The monster was born in the castle. I came to Hagrid from a distant land, in the pocket of a traveler. RON: Harry. HARRY: Shush. But if you’re not the monster, then- then what did kill that girl fifty years ago? ARAGOG: We do not speak of it. It is an ancient creature we spiders fear above all others. HARRY: But have you seen it? ARAGOG: I never saw any part of the castle but the box in which Hagrid kept me. The girl was discovered in a bathroom. When I was accused, Hagrid brought me here. RON: Harry! HARRY: What? RON: Ahh- hhh... -- Scene 27: Spider attack. HARRY: Well, thank you. We’ll just...go. ARAGOG: Go? I think not. My sons and daughters do not harm Hagrid on my command. But I cannot deny them fresh meat when it wanders so willingly into our midst. Good-bye, friend of Hagrid. RON: Can we panic now? RON: Know any spells? HARRY: One, but it’s not powerful enough for all of them. RON: Where’s Hermione when you need her? HARRY: Let’s go! Arania exumai! Go! HARRY, RON: Whoah! RON: Glad we’re out of there. Ah- Aaaah! HARRY: Arania exumai! RON: Thanks for that. HARRY: Don’t mention it. Get us out of here. Now! Come on! Come on! Move faster! HARRY, RON: Aah! HARRY: Go on! Go! Get us in the air. RON: The flying gear’s jammed! HARRY: Come on! Pull! RON: I’m trying! RON: Follow the spiders! Follow the spiders! If Hagrid ever gets out of Azkaban, I’ll kill him! I mean, what was the point of sending us in there? What have we found out? HARRY: We know one thing. Hagrid never opened the Chamber of Secrets. He was innocent. -- Scene 28: Missing. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – dusk -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital wing - dusk HARRY: Wish you were here Hermione. We need you... now, more than ever. RON: What’s that? HARRY: Ron, this is why Hermione was in the Library the day she was attacked. Come on! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - corridor - night HARRY: ‘Of the many fearsome beasts that roam our land, none is more deadly than the basilisk. Capable of living for hundreds of years, instant death awaits any who meet this giant serpent’s eye. Spiders flee before it.’ Ron, this is it. The monster in the Chamber of Secrets is a basilisk. That’s why I can hear it speak. It’s a snake! RON: But if it kills by looking people in the eye, why is it no one’s dead? HARRY: Because no one did look it in the eye. Not directly, at least. Colin saw it through his camera. Justin...Justin must have seen the basilisk through Nearly Headless Nick. Nick got the full blast of it- but he’s a ghost- he couldn’t die again. And Hermione...had the mirror. I bet you anything she was using it to look around corners, in case it came along. RON: And Mrs. Norris? I’m pretty sure she didn’t have a camera or a mirror, Harry. HARRY: The water. There was water on the floor that night. She only saw the basilisk’s reflection. ‘Spiders flee before it.’ It all fits! RON: But how’s a basilisk been getting around? A dirty great snake- someone would have seen it. HARRY: Hermione’s answered that, too. RON: Pipes? It’s using the plumbing! HARRY: Remember what Aragog said, about that girl fifty years ago? She died in a bathroom? What if she never left? RON: Moaning Myrtle. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: All students are to return to their house dormitories at once. All teachers to the second floor corridor, immediately. --- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - night PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: As you can see, the Heir of Slytherin has left another message. Our worst fear has been realized. A student has been taken by the monster into the Chamber itself. The students must be sent home. I’m afraid this is the end of Hogwarts. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: So sorry- dozed off- what have I missed? SNAPE: A girl has been snatched by the monster, Lockhart. Your moment has come, at last. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: My m-moment? SNAPE: Weren’t you saying just last night that you’ve known all along where the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets is? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Well, that’s settled. We’ll leave you to deal with the monster, Gilderoy. Your skills, after all, are legend. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Very well- ah- I’ll just be in my office getting, umgetting ready. MADAME POMFREY: Who is it that the monster’s taken, Minerva? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Ginny Weasley. RON: ‘Her skeleton will lie in the chamber forever.’ Ginny... -- Scene 29: Chamber of Secrets. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – DADA Classroom - night HARRY: Lockhart may be useless, but he’s going to try and get into the Chamber. At least we can tell him what we know. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Professor Lockhart’s office - night HARRY: Professor, we have some information for you! Are you going somewhere? PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Uh, ah- well, yes- um, urgent call- unavoidable- got to go. RON: What about my sister?! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Well, um- as to that, most unfortunate. No one regrets more than I. RON: You’re the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher! You can’t go now! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Well- I must say- when I took the job there was nothing in the job description about aHARRY: You’re running away? After all that stuff you did in your books? PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Books can be misleading! HARRY: You wrote them! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: My dear boy, do use your common sense! My books wouldn’t have sold half as well if people didn’t think I’d done all those things! HARRY: You’re a fraud! You’ve just been taking credit for what other wizards have done! RON: Is there anything you can do? PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Yes, now you mention it. I’m rather gifted with Memory Charms. Otherwise, you see, all those wizards would have gone blabbing. And I’d never have sold another book. In fact, ah...I’m ah...going to have to do the same to you. HARRY: Don’t even think about it. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Girl’s bathroom - night MOANING MYRTLE: Oh! Who’s there? Oh! Hello, Harry! Ron. What do you want? HARRY: To ask you how you died. MOANING MYRTLE: Oh! It was dreadful. It happened right here in this very cubicle. I’d hidden because Olive Hornby was teasing me about my glasses. I was crying, and then I heard somebody come in. HARRY: Who was it Myrtle? MOANING MYRTLE: I don’t know. I was Distraught! Huhh-huh...But they said something funny, a kind of made up language. And I realized it was a boy speaking, so I unlocked the door to tell him to go away and... I died. HARRY: Just like that? How? MOANING MYRTLE: I just remember seeing a pair of great big yellow eyes...over there, by that sink. Ohhhhooo... HARRY: This is it. This is it, Ron. I think this is the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets. RON: Say something. Harry, say something in Parseltongue! HARRY: Hesha- Hassah. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Excellent, Harry. Haa! Good work! Well then, I’ll just be, ah... There’s no need for me to stay. HARRY: Oh, yes there is! You first. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Now, boys what good will it do? RON: Better you than us. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Um...but...obviously, yes. Sure you don’t want to test it first? No! Aaaah! It’s really quite filthy down here. HARRY: All right. Let’s go. MOANING MYRTLE: Oh, Harry? If you die down there, you’re welcome to share my toilet. Hee, hee. HARRY: Uh...thanks Myrtle. HARRY & RON: Aaah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – underground chambers RON: Ugh! HARRY: Now remember, any sign of movement, close your eyes straightaway. RON: Go on. --Scene 30: Backfire. HARRY: This way. RON: What’s this? PROFESSOR LOCKHART: It looks like a... snake. HARRY: It’s a snakeskin. RON: Bloody hell. Whatever shed this must be sixty feet long-- or more! Heart of a lion, this one. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: The adventure ends here, boys. But don’t fret. The world will know our story. How I was too late to save the girl. How you two tragically lost your minds at the sight of her mangled body. So, you first, Mr. Potter. Say good-bye to your memories. Obliviate! RON: Harry! Harry! HARRY: Ron! Ron, are you ok? RON: I’m fine! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Uhh... Hello. Who are you? RON: Um...Ron Weasley. PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Really? And uh, who- who am I? RON: Lockhart’s memory charm backfired. He hasn’t got a clue who he is! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: It’s an odd sort of place this, isn’t it? Do you live here? RON: No! PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Really? WellRON: What’ll do I do now? HARRY: You wait here and try and shift some of this rock so we can get back through. I’ll go on and find Ginny! RON: OK. HARRY: Hesha- Hassah. -- Scene 31: Heir of Slytherin. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Chamber of Secrets HARRY: Ginny... Ginny! Oh, Ginny, please don’t be dead. Wake up. Wake up! Please, wake up! TOM RIDDLE: She won’t wake. HARRY: Tom. Tom Riddle! What do you mean, ‘she won’t wake?’ She’s not...? TOM RIDDLE: She’s still alive, but only just. HARRY: Are you a ghost? TOM RIDDLE: A memory, preserved in a diary for fifty years. HARRY: She’s cold as ice. Ginny, please don’t be dead. Wake up! You’ve got to help me, Tom. There’s a basilisk. TOM RIDDLE: It won’t come until it’s called. HARRY: Give me my wand, Tom. TOM RIDDLE: You won’t be needing it. HARRY: Listen, we’ve got to go! We’ve got to save her! TOM RIDDLE: I’m afraid I can’t do that, Harry. You see, as poor Ginny grows weaker, I grow stronger. Yes Harry, it was Ginny Weasley who opened the Chamber of Secrets. HARRY: No. She couldn’t. She wouldn’t! TOM RIDDLE: It was Ginny who set the basilisk on the Mudbloods and Filch’s cat, Ginny who wrote the threatening messages on the walls. HARRY: But why? TOM RIDDLE: Because I told her to. You’ll find that I can be very persuasive. Not that she knew what she was doing. She was, shall we say, in a kind of trance. Still, the power of the diary began to scare her. And she tried to dispose of it in the girl’s bathroom. And then, who should find it, but you? The very person I was most anxious to meet. HARRY: But, why did you want to meet me? TOM RIDDLE: I knew I had to talk to you, meet you if I could. So I decided to show you my capture of that brainless oaf, Hagrid, to gain your trust. HARRY: Hagrid’s my friend! And you framed him, didn’t you? TOM RIDDLE: It was my word against Hagrid’s. Only Dumbledore seemed to think he was innocent. HARRY: I’ll bet Dumbledore saw right through you. TOM RIDDLE: He certainly kept an annoyingly close watch on me after that. I knew it wouldn’t be safe to open the Chamber again while I was still at school, so I decided to leave behind a diary preserving my sixteen-year-old self in its pages, so that one day I would be able to lead another to finish Salazar Slytherin’s noble work. HARRY: Well, you haven’t finished it this time. In a few hours, the Mandrake Draught will be ready, and everyone who was Petrified will be all right again. TOM RIDDLE: Haven’t I told you? Killing Mudbloods doesn’t matter to me anymore. For many months now, my new target... has been you. How is it that a baby, with no extraordinary magical talent, was able to defeat the greatest wizard of all time? How did you escape with nothing but a scar, while Lord Voldemort’s powers were destroyed? HARRY: Why do you care how I escaped? Voldemort was after your time. TOM RIDDLE: Voldemort is my past, present, and future. (writes in the air) TOM MARVOLO RIDDLE (rearranges) I AM LORD VOLDEMORT HARRY: You! You’re the Heir of Slytherin. You’re Voldemort. TOM RIDDLE: Surely, you didn’t think I was going to keep my filthy Muggle father’s name? No. I fashioned myself a new name, a name I knew wizards everywhere would one day fear to speak, when I became the greatest sorcerer in the world. HARRY: Albus Dumbledore is the greatest sorcerer in the world! TOM RIDDLE: Dumbledore’s been driven out of this castle by the mere memory of me! HARRY: He’ll never be gone! Not as long as those who remain are loyal to him! Fawkes? TOM RIDDLE: So, this is what Dumbledore sends his great defender, a songbird and an old hat. Shearhas- Samnathas- Sélithaeine. -- Scene 32: The Basilisk. TOM RIDDLE: Let’s match the power of Lord Voldemort, Heir of Salazar Slytherin, against the famous Harry Potter. Sethae- He- This. Parseltongue won’t save you now, Potter. It only obeys me! TOM RIDDLE: No! Your bird may have blinded the basilisk, but it can still hear you! TOM RIDDLE: Yes, Potter, the process is nearly complete. In a few minutes Ginny will be dead, and I will cease to be a memory. Lord Voldemort will return- very... much... alive! HARRY: Ginny- -- Scene 33: Healing powers. TOM RIDDLE: Remarkable isn’t it, how quickly the venom of the basilisk penetrates the body? I’d guess you have little more than a minute to live. You’ll be with your dear Mudblood mother soon, Harry. Funny, the damage a silly little book can do... especially in the hands of a silly, little girl. What are you doing? Stop. No! Ahhhh! Ahhhh! Ahhhh! HARRY: Ginny... GINNY: Harry. It was me- but I swear, I didn’t mean to! Riddle made me, and... Harry, you’re hurt! HARRY: Don’t worry. Ginny, you need to get yourself out. Follow the Chamber, and you’ll find Ron. You were brilliant, Fawkes. I just wasn’t quick enough... Of course! Phoenix tears have healing powers. Thanks! It’s alright, Ginny. It’s over. It’s just a memory. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – flying up out of chambers - night PROFESSOR LOCKHART: Amazing! This is just like magic! -- Scene 34: Out of the hat. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dumbledore’s office - morning DUMBLEDORE: You both realize, of course, that in the past few hours you have broken perhaps a dozen school rules? HARRY, RON: Yes, sir. DUMBLEDORE: And there is sufficient evidence to have you both expelled. HARRY, RON: Yes, sir. DUMBLEDORE: Therefore, it is only fitting, that you both receive Special Awards for Services to the School. RON: Thanks, sir! DUMBLEDORE: And now, Mr. Weasley, if you would, have an owl deliver these release papers to Azkaban? I believe we- we want our gamekeeper back. Harry... first, I want to thank you, Harry. You must have shown me real loyalty down in the Chamber. Nothing but that could have called Fawkes to you. And, um... second, I sense that something is troubling you. Am I right, Harry? HARRY: It’s just... You see, sir I- I couldn’t help but notice certain things, certain- certain similarities, between Tom Riddle and me. DUMBLEDORE: I see. Well, you can speak Parseltongue, Harry. Why? Because Lord Voldemort can speak Parseltongue. If I’m not mistaken, Harry, he transferred some of his powers to you the night he gave you that scar. HARRY: Voldemort transferred some of his powers... to me? DUMBLEDORE: Not intentionally, but yes. HARRY: So the Sorting Hat was right! I should be in Slytherin. DUMBLEDORE: It’s true, Harry. You possess many of the qualities that Voldemort himself prizes. Determination, resourcefulness, and if I may say so, a certain disregard for the rules. Why then did the Sorting Hat place you in Gryffindor? HARRY: Because I asked it to. DUMBLEDORE: Exactly, Harry! Exactly! Which makes you different from Voldemort. It is not our abilities that show what we truly are. It is our choices. If you want proof why you belong in Gryffindor, then I suggest that you look more closely at this. Be careful. HARRY: Godric Gryffindor. DUMBLEDORE: Ah- it would take a true Gryffindor to pull that out of the hat. -- Scene 35: Dobby’s reward. HARRY: Dobby! So this is your master! The family you serve is the Malfoys. DOBBY: Um-humm... LUCIUS MALFOY: I’ll deal with you later. Out of my way, Potter! So, it’s true-- you have returned! DUMBLEDORE: When the governors learned that Arthur Weasley’s daughter was taken into the Chamber, they saw fit to summon me back. LUCIUS MALFOY: Ridiculous! DUMBLEDORE: Curiously, Lucius, several of them were under the impression that you would curse their families, if they did not agree to suspend me in the first place. LUCIUS MALFOY: How dare you?! DUMBLEDORE: I beg your pardon? LUCIUS MALFOY: My sole concern has always been, and will always be, the welfare of this school and, of course, its students. The culprit has been identified, I presume? DUMBLEDORE: Oh, yes. LUCIUS MALFOY: And? Who was it? DUMBLEDORE: Voldemort. LUCIUS MALFOY: Ah! DUMBLEDORE: Only, this time, he chose to act through somebody else, by means of this. LUCIUS MALFOY: I see. DUMBLEDORE: Fortunately, our young Mr. Potter discovered it. One hopes that no more of Lord Voldemort’s old school things should find their way into innocent hands. The consequences for the one responsible would be severe. LUCIUS MALFOY: Well, let us hope that Mr. Potter will always be around to save the day. HARRY: Don’t worry. I will be. LUCIUS MALFOY: Dumbledore. Come, Dobby. We’re leaving. DOBBY: Ahh! Oow! HARRY: Sir, I wonder if I could have that? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - hallway - daytime HARRY: Mr. Malfoy! Mr. Malfoy! I have something of yours. LUCIUS MALFOY: Mine? I don’t know what you’re talking about. HARRY: Oh, I think you do, sir. I think you slipped the diary into Ginny Weasley’s cauldron, that day at Diagon Alley. LUCIUS MALFOY: You do, do you? Why don’t you prove it? Come, Dobby. Dobby! HARRY: Open it. LUCIUS MALFOY: Dobby? DOBBY: Master has given Dobby a sock! LUCIUS MALFOY: What? I didn’t giveDOBBY: Master has presented Dobby with clothes! Dobby is free! LUCIUS MALFOY: You’ve lost me my servant! DOBBY: You shall not harm Harry Potter! LUCIUS MALFOY: AdvadaLUCIUS MALFOY: Your parents were meddlesome fools, too. You mark my words, Potter, one day soon you are going to meet the same sticky end! DOBBY: Harry Potter freed Dobby! How can Dobby ever repay him? HARRY: Just promise me something. DOBBY: Anything, sir! HARRY: Never try to save my life again. -- Scene 36: Welcome back. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – decorated for Leaving Feast - night OTHER: Welcome back, Sir Nicholas! SIR NICHOLAS: Thank you! OTHER: Good evening, Sir Nicholas! SIR NICHOLAS: Good evening! OTHER: Good to see you, Sir Nicholas! SIR NICHOLAS: Thank you! Hello! Hermione! Welcome back! HERMIONE: Thanks, Sir Nicholas! NEVILLE: Harry- it’s Hermione! RON: Uhh-um... Welcome back, Hermione. HERMIONE: It’s good to be back! Congratulations! I can’t believe you solved it! HARRY: Well, we had loads of help from you. We couldn’t have done it without you. HERMIONE: Thanks. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Could I have your attention, please? DUMBLEDORE: Before we begin the feast, let us have a round of applause for Professor Sprout and Madame Pomfrey, whose Mandrake juice has been so successfully administered to all who had been Petrified. Also, in light of the recent events, as a school treat, all exams have been canceled. HERMIONE: Oh, no! HAGRID: Sorry I’m late! The owl that delivered my release papers got all lost and confused. Some ruddy bird called Errol. And I’d just like to say that aif it hadn’t been for you, Harry, and Ron, and Hermione, o’ course, I woulduh- I’d still be you-know-where, so I- I’d just like to say ‘Thanks.’ HARRY: Well, there’s no Hogwarts without you, Hagrid. HAGRID: Oh! OTHERS: Yeah! Yeah! -- Scene 37: End Credits. -The End-

HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN -- Scene 1: Under covers prologue. --- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Harry’s room - night HARRY: Lumos Maxima... HARRY: Lumos Maxima... HARRY: Lumos Maxima... HARRY: Lumos Maxima... HARRY: Lumos... Maxima! -- Scene 2: Aunt Marge’s big mistake. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – entryway - daytime AUNT PETUNIA: Harry! Harry! Harry! Open the door! AUNT PETUNIA: Marge! Lovely to see you- How was the train? HARRY: Uncle Vernon. I need you to sign this form. UNCLE VERNON: What is it? HARRY: Nothing. School stuff. UNCLE VERNON: Later perhaps, if you behave. HARRY: I will if she does. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Dining room - daytime AUNT MARGE: Oh- Still here, are you? HARRY: Yes. AUNT MARGE: Don’t say 'yes' in that ungrateful way. Good of my brother to keep ya. He'd have been straight into an orphanage if he'd been dumped on my doorstep, Vernon. DUDLEY: Ah-ha-ha-ha... Ah-ha! -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Living room - daytime AUNT MARGE: Is that my Dudders?! Is that my little neffy-poo? Come give us a kiss. Come on up, up, up! Oh-ho, yes, hmm. That’s a good boy! UNCLE VERNON: Take Marge’s suitcase upstairs. HARRY: Okay. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Dining room - night AUNT MARGE: Now, finish that off for mummy. Good boy, Rippy-pooh. UNCLE VERNON: Can I tempt you, Marge? AUNT MARGE: Just a small one. Excellent nosh, Petunia. Heh- eh, a bit more. Usually it’s just a fry-up for me, what with twelve dogs. A bit more... That's a boy. Umm. Aah. You want to try a little drop of brandy? A little bit ‘o brundybrandy-wundy-wandy for Rippy-pippy-pooh?... What are you smirking at? HARRY: (shrug) AUNT MARGE: Where is it you send the boy, Vernon? UNCLE VERNON: St. Brutus's. It's a fine institution for hopeless cases. AUNT MARGE: Do they use the cane at St. Brutus's, boy? HARRY: Oh, yeah. Yeah- I’ve, I've been beaten loads of times. Umm. AUNT MARGE: Excellent. I won't have this namby-pamby, wishy-washy nonsense about not beating people who deserve it. Heh- But you mustn't blame yourself about how this one's turned out, Vernon. It’s all to do with blood. Bad blood will out. What is it the boy's father did, Petunia? AUNT PETUNIA: Nothing. Uh, he did... he didn't work. He was- was- unemployed. AUNT MARGE: And a drunk, too, no doubtHARRY: That's a lie. AUNT MARGE: What did you say? HARRY: My dad wasn't a drunk. AUNT PETUNIA: Oh! AUNT MARGE: Oh, huh-ha! Don’t worry. Don’t fuss, Petunia. I have a very firm grip. UNCLE VERNON: I think it’s time you went to bed. AUNT MARGE: Quiet, Vernon. You- clean it up! Actually, it’s nothing to do with the father. It’s all to do with the mother. You see it all the time with dogs. If there's something wrong with the bitch, then there’s something wrong with the pup... HARRY: Shut up! Shut up! AUNT MARGE: Umm. Right. Let me tell you... y- ye... UNCLE VERNON: Ohm... umm... AUNT MARGE: Ah! Ahh! Vernon! Vernon, Vernon, do something! UNCLE VERNON: Ow! Ripper! Owww! R- Ripper, get down boy! Get down! AUNT MARGE: Whoo-ooo-oooh! UNCLE VERNON: STOP! -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – outside - night UNCLE VERNON: I've got you, Marge... I’ve got you... Ow! AUNT MARGE: Ah! Ahhh! UNCLE VERNON: Hold on... Hold on! Hold on! Get off of there! AUNT MARGE: Don't you dare – UNCLE VERNON: Sorry. AUNT MARGE: Aaaah! AUNT PETUNIA: Oh, Vernon! Oh, gosh! UNCLE VERNON: Ahhh! AUNT MARGE: Ahhhh! UNCLE VERNON: Please! Marge! Please! Marge! LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Dining room - night -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Harry’s room – night HARRY: Ugh! -- Scene 3: The Knight Bus. -- LOCATION: No. Four Privet Drive – Entryway – night UNCLE VERNON: You bring her back! You bring her back now and put her right! HARRY: No! She deserved what she got! And you keep away from me. UNCLE VERNON: You're not allowed to do magic outside of school. HARRY: Yeah? Try me. UNCLE VERNON: They won't let you back now. You've nowhere to go. HARRY: I don’t care. Anywhere's better than here. -- LOCATION: Magnolia Crescent – outside - night DOG: (barking) AUNT MARGE: Ahh-ha-ha! Ahhh! HARRY: Umf! STAN SHUNPIKE: Welcome to the Knight Bus: Emergency transport for the stranded witch or wizard. My name is Stan Shunpike, and I will be your conductor for this evening. Wha' choo doin' down there? HARRY: I fell over. STAN SHUNPIKE: Wha' choo fall over for? HARRY: I didn't do it on purpose. STAN SHUNPIKE: Well, come on then. Let's not wait for the grass to grow. Wha' choo lookin’ at? HARRY: Nothing. STAN SHUNPIKE: Well, come on, then- in. No, no, no, I’ll get this, you get in... -- LOCATION: Knight Bus – interior - night STAN SHUNPIKE: Uh, whoa, uhh... Come on, move on, move on, move on, oh- Take 'er away, Ern. SHRUNKEN HEAD: Yeah, take it away, Ernie! It’s goin’ to be a boompy ride! STAN SHUNPIKE: Wot did you say your name was again? HARRY: I didn't. STAN SHUNPIKE: Well, whereabouts are you headed'? HARRY: The Leaky Cauldron. That's in London... STAN SHUNPIKE: Do you ‘ear that, Ern? ‘The Leaky Cauldron. That's in London.’ SHRUNKEN HEAD: The Leaky Cauldron! Heh- if you have the pea soup, make sure you eat it before it eats you! Ha ha ha ha ha haaaa! HARRY: But the Muggles? Won’t they see us? STAN SHUNPIKE: Muggles? They don’t see nuthin’, do they? SHRUNKEN HEAD: No, but if you stab them with a fork, they feel it! Ha ha ha! Ernie, little old lady at twelve o'clock! HARRY: Oomf! SHRUNKEN HEAD: Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, three and a half, two, one and three-quarters... yes! HARRY: Who is that? That man. STAN SHUNPIKE: Who is that? Who is- That is Sirius Black, that is. Don' tell me you’ve ne'er been hearin' o' Sirius Black? He’s a murderer. Got 'imself locked up in Azkaban for it. HARRY: How did he escape? STAN SHUNPIKE: Well, tha's the question, isn't it? He's the firs' one that done it. He was a big supporter of... You-Know-'Oo. Reckon you heard of him? HARRY: Yeah. Him I've heard of. SHRUNKEN HEAD: Ernie, two double-deckers at twelve o’clock. They’re getting closer, Ernie. Ernie, they’re right on top of us! Mind your head. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, heh! Hey, guys? Guys? Why the long faces? Ha ha ha ha ha! Yeah, yeah. Nearly there. Nearly there. Nearly there. STAN SHUNPIKE: The Leaky Cauldron. SHRUNKEN HEAD: Next stop: Knockturn Alley. TOM: Ahh! Mr. Potter... at last. STAN SHUNPIKE: Take 'er away, Ern. SHRUNKEN HEAD: Yeah, take it away, Ernie! -- Scene 4: The Leaky Cauldron. -- LOCATION: Leaky Cauldron – Pub - night TOM: Room eleven. -- LOCATION: Leaky Cauldron – Fudge’s room - night HARRY: Hedwig! TOM: Right smart bird you've got there, Mr. Potter. He arrived here just five minutes before yourself. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Eh-hem... As the Minister for Magic, it is my duty to inform you, Mr. Potter, that earlier this evening your uncle's sister was located a little south of Sheffield, circling a chimney stack. The Accidental Magic Reversal Department was dispatched immediately. She has been properly punctured and her memory modified. She will have no recollection of the incident whatsoever. So, that's that... and no harm done. Pea soup? HARRY: Uh- no thank you. Um, Minister... CORNELIUS FUDGE: Yes? HARRY: I don't understand. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Understand? HARRY: I broke the law. Underage wizards aren’t allowed to use magic at home -- CORNELIUS FUDGE: Oh, come now, Harry. The Ministry doesn't send people to Azkaban for blowing up their aunts! TOM: Huh, huh, huh, huh! CORNELIUS FUDGE: On the other hand, running away like that, given the state of things, was very, very irresponsible. HARRY: 'The state of things' sir? CORNELIUS FUDGE: We have a killer on the loose. HARRY: Sirius Black, you mean? But, what's he got to do with me? CORNELIUS FUDGE: Uh-hmm? Oh, nothing, of course. You're safe. And that's what matters. And tomorrow you'll be on your way back to Hogwarts. Oh- ah, these are your new schoolbooks. I took the liberty of having them brought here for you. Now, Tom will show you to your room. HARRY: Hedwig. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Oh, by the way, Harry. Whilst you're here it would be best if you didn't, ah... wander. -- Scene 5: The Monster Book of Monsters. -- LOCATION: Leaky Cauldron – Room 11 – morning OTHER: Right! You gonna move that bus, or what? -- Scene 6: In grave danger. -- LOCATION: Leaky Cauldron – Hallway - morning YOUNG WITCH: Housekeeping. I'll come back later. RON: I'm warning you, Hermione! Keep that bloody beast of yours away from Scabbers or I'll turn it into a tea cozy. HERMIONE: He's a cat, Ronald! What do you expect? It's in his nature. RON: A cat! Is that what they told you? Looks more like a pig with hair, if you ask me. HERMIONE: That's rich, coming from the owner of that smelly old shoe brush. It's all right, Crookshanks. You just ignore the mean little boy... RON: Harry! HERMIONE: Harry! -- LOCATION: Leaky Cauldron – Pub - morning HARRY: Egypt! What's it like? RON: Brilliant. Loads of old stuff, like mummies, tombs – even Scabbers enjoyed himself! HERMIONE: You know, the Egyptians used to worship cats. RON: Yeah- along with the dung beetle! GEORGE: Not flashing that clipping about again, are you, Ron? RON: I haven't shown anyone! FRED: No, not a soul. Not unless you count Tom. GEORGE: The day maid. FRED: The night maid. GEORGE: The cook. FRED: That bloke that came to fix the toilet. GEORGE: And that wizard from Belgium... MRS. WEASLEY: Harry! HARRY: Mrs. Weasley. MRS. WEASLEY: Good to see you, dear! HARRY: Good to see you, too. MRS. WEASLEY: Now, you’ve got everything you need? HARRY: Yep. MRS. WEASLEY: Yes? All of your books? HARRY: Yeah, it’s all upstairs. MRS. WEASLEY: And all of your clothes? HARRY: Everything’s there. MRS. WEASLEY: Good boy. HARRY: Thank you. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Harry Potter! HARRY: Mr. Weasley. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Harry, I wonder if I might have a word? HARRY: Yeah, sure. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Hermione! HERMIONE: Good morning, Mr. Weasley. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Looking forward to a new term? HARRY: Yeah, it should be great. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Harry, there are some within the Ministry who would strongly discourage me from divulging what I'm about to reveal to you. But, I think that you need to know the facts. You are in danger. Grave danger. HARRY: Has this anything to do with Sirius Black, sir? ARTHUR WEASLEY: What do you know about Sirius Black, Harry? HARRY: Only that he’s escaped from Azkaban. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Do you know why? Harry, thirteen years ago, when you stopped... HARRY: Voldemort...? ARTHUR WEASLEY: Don’t say his name. HARRY: Sorry. ARTHUR WEASLEY: ...when you stopped You-Know-Who, Black lost everything. But, to this day he still remains a faithful servant. And, in his mind, you are the only thing that stands in the way of You-Know-Who returning to power. And that is why he has escaped from Azkaban. To find you. HARRY: And kill me. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Harry. I want you to swear to me that whatever you might hear -- you won't go looking for Black. HARRY: Mr. Weasley, why would I go looking for someone who wants to kill me? -- Scene 7: The Dementor. -- LOCATION: Platform nine and three-quarters - daytime MRS. WEASLEY: Quick, quick! Ron, Ron! Oh, for goodness’ sake! Don’t loose him! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – interior - daytime HARRY: I didn't mean to blow her up. I just- I lost control. RON: Brilliant! HERMIONE: Honestly, Ron, it's not funny. Harry was lucky not to be expelled. HARRY: I think I was lucky not to be arrested, actually. RON: I still think it was brilliant. HERMIONE: Come on. Everywhere else is full. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – compartment - daytime RON: Who d'you think that is? HERMIONE: Professor R. J. Lupin. RON: You know everything. How is it she knows everything? HERMIONE: It's on his suitcase, Ronald. RON: Oh. HARRY: Do you think he’s really asleep? HERMIONE: Seems to be. Why? HARRY: I’ve got to tell you something. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – exterior – night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – compartment - night RON: Let me get this straight. Sirius Black has escaped from Azkaban to come after you? HARRY: Yeah. HERMIONE: But they'll catch Black, won't they? I mean- everyone’s looking for him. RON: Sure... except, no one's ever broken out of Azkaban before, and he's a murderous, raving lunatic. HARRY: Thanks, Ron. HERMIONE: Why are we stopping? We can't be there yet... RON: What's going on? HARRY: Dunno... maybe we've broken down. HERMIONE: Ouch! Ron, that was my foot! RON: There's something moving out there. I think... someone’s coming aboard. (bam) RON: Bloody hell! What's happening? SCABBERS: (squeak) HARRY: Ah... VOICE: (scream) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – compartment – night - later HERMIONE: Harry? Harry, are you all right? HARRY: Thank you. LUPIN: Here, eat this. It’ll help. It’s alright, it’s chocolate. HARRY: Wh- what was that thing... that came? LUPIN: It was a dementor. One of the guards of Azkaban. It's gone now. It was searching the train for Sirius Black. If you’ll excuse me, I need to have a little word with the driver. Eat. You’ll feel better. HARRY: What happened to me? RON: Well, you sort of went rigid. We thought maybe you were having a fit or something. HARRY: And... and did either of you two? You know... pass out? RON: No. I felt weird, though. Like I'd never be cheerful again. HARRY: But someone was screaming. A woman. HERMIONE: No one was screaming, Harry. -- Scene 8: Welcome and warning. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Exterior – stormy night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – decorated for Start of Term feast - night CHOIR: In the cauldron boil and bake. Fillet of a fenny snake. Scale of dragon, tooth of wolf. Witch’s mummy, maw and gulf. Double, double, toil and trouble. Fire burn and cauldron bubble. Double, double, toil and trouble. Fire burn and cauldron bubble. Double, double toil and trouble. Fire burn and cauldron bubble! Something wicked this way comes! DUMBLEDORE: Welcome! Welcome to another year at Hogwarts! Now, I’d like to say a few words before we all become too befuddled by our excellent feast. First, I'm pleased to welcome Professor R. J. Lupin, who’s kindly consented to fill the post of Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Good luck, Professor! ALL: (applause) HERMIONE: Of course! That's why he knew to give you the chocolate, Harry. DRACO: Potter... Potter! Is it true you fainted? OTHER: Ohhhh! DRACO: I mean, you actually fainted? RON: Shove off, Malfoy. HARRY: How did he find out? HERMIONE: Just forget it. DUMBLEDORE: As some of you may know, Professor Kettleburn, our Care of Magical Creatures teacher for many years, has decided to retire in order to spend more time with his remaining limbs. Fortunately, I'm delighted to announce that his place will be taken by none other than our own Rubeus Hagrid! ALL: (Applause) HERMIONE: Whoo-hoo! DUMBLEDORE: Finally, on a more disquieting note, at the request of the Ministry of Magic, Hogwarts will, until further notice, play host to the dementors of Azkaban, until such a time as Sirius Black is captured. The dementors will be stationed at every entrance to the grounds. Now, whilst I’ve been assured that their presence will not disrupt our day-to-day activities... a word of caution. dementors are vicious creatures. They will not distinguish between the one they hunt, and the one who gets in their way. Therefore, I must warn each and every one of you to give them no reason to harm you. It is not in the nature of a dementor to be forgiving. But, you know, happiness can be found even in the darkest of times... if only one remembers to turn on the light. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entryway – night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Moving staircase - night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor Tower entrance - night FAT LADY: Ahhhh! Ah-ha-haa-aooo! SEAMUS: Fortuna Major. Here, listen. She just won’t let me in. HARRY: Fortuna Major. FAT LADY: No, no, no- wait. Wait. Watch this! Ah-ha-ha-Aaaah- amazing! Just with my voice! HARRY: Fortuna Major! FAT LADY: Yes, alright. Go in. HARRY: Thank you. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Gryffindor common room - night HARRY: She’s still doing that after three years. She can’t even sing! SEAMUS: Exactly! OTHER: Hey, man. DEAN THOMAS: Hey, man- ugh! OTHER: Oh, God. OTHER: That’s awful! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory - night RON: Oh, green. That’s a monkey. SEAMUS: (monkey sounds) OTHER: What is that? You call that a monkey? Do not give him one again. RON: Hey, Neville, try an elephant. OTHER: Oh, yeah! That’s amazing. NEVILLE: (elephant sounds) SEAMUS: Ron, catch. RON: I will- (lion sounds) OTHER: I think we have a winner. RON: Oh, don’t try one of them! OTHER: Oh, noHARRY: (train whistle sound) OTHER: Look at him! Look at his face! -- Scene 9: Tea leaves. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – North Tower - Divination Classroom - daytime PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Welcome, my children. In this room, you shall explore the noble art of Divination. In this room, you shall discover if you possess... ‘the Sight’! Hello. I am Professor Trelawney. Together, we shall cast ourselves into the future. This term we shall be focusing on Tasseomancy, which is the art of reading tea leaves. So please, take the cup of the person sitting opposite you... What do you see? The truth lies buried, like a sentence deep within a book, waiting to be read. But first, you must broaden your minds. First, you must look... beyond! HERMIONE: What a load of rubbish. RON: Where did you come from? HERMIONE: Me? I've been here all this time. PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: You, boy! Is your grandmother quite well? NEVILLE: Ah... I- I think so. PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: I wouldn't be so sure of that. Give me the cup. Oh, umm. Pity. Broaden your minds. Hmmm. Woah! Your aura is pulsing, dear! Are you in the beyond? I think you are! RON: Sure. PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Look at the cup. Tell me what you see. RON: Oh, yeah, um, well, Harry’s got a sort of a wonky cross- that’s trials and suffering- and, uh, that there could be the sun- and that’s happiness- so, ah, you’re gonna suffer, but you’re gonna be happy about it. PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Give me the cup. Oh- aah! Oh, dear boy. My dear...you have the Grim! SEAMUS: The Grin? What's the Grin? BEM: Not the grin, you idiot. The Grim. ‘Taking the form of a giant spectral dog, it’s among the darkest omens in our world. It’s an omen of death.’ -- Scene 10: Buckbeak. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime RON: You don’t think that Grim thing’s got anything to do with Sirius Black, do you? HERMIONE: Oh, honestly, Ron. If you ask me, Divination's a very wooly discipline. Now, Ancient Runes. That's a fascinating subject. RON: Ancient Runes? Exactly how many classes are you taking this term? HERMIONE: A fair few. RON: Hang on. That’s not possible. Ancient Runes is in the same time as Divination. You'd have to be in two classes at once! HERMIONE: Don't be silly, Ronald. How could anyone be in two classes at once? ‘Broaden your minds... use your inner eye to see the future...’ -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – exterior - daytime HAGRID: That’s it. C'mon now. Come closer! Less talkin’, if you don’ mind. I got a real treat for yeh today. A great lesson. So follow me. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime HAGRID: Right, you lot. Less chatterin’. Form a group over there. And open yer books to page forty-nine. DRACO: And exactly how do we do that? HAGRID: Well, just stroke the spine, o’ course. Goodness me! NEVILLE: Aaah! OTHER: Don’t be such a wimp, Longbottom. NEVILLE: I’m okay. Okay. Aaah! HERMIONE: I think they’re funny. DRACO: Oh, yeah. Terribly funny. Really witty. God, this place has gone to the dogs. Wait until my father hears that Dumbledore's got this oaf teaching classes. GOYLE: Huh! CRABBE: Ha, ha, ha, ha! HARRY: Shut up, Malfoy! DRACO AND OTHERS: Ooooh! DRACO: Dementor! Dementor! OTHERS: Ah, ha ha ha ha! Oooooh! HERMIONE: Just ignore him. RON: You’re supposed to stroke it. NEVILLE: Yeah. HAGRID: Ahem. Ta-ta-ta-dah! Isn’t he beautiful? Say hello to Buckbeak. RON: Hagrid. Exactly what is that? HAGRID: That, Ron, is a hippogriff. Firs' thing yeh wanna know abou’ hippogriffs is that they're very proud creatures. Very easily offended. You do not want to insult a hippogriff. It may just be the las' thing yeh ever do. Now, who’d like ter come an' say hello? HAGRID: Well done, Harry! Well done. Come on, now. Now, you have to let 'im make the firs' move. It's only polite. So, step up, give 'im a nice bow. Then you wait and see if he bows back. And if he does, you can go and touch him. If notwell, we’ll get to that later. Just make your bow. Nice and low. HAGRID: Back off, Harry! Back off! Keep still. Keep still. Oh, ho! Well done, Harry! Well done! Here, ya big brute, ya... Right. I think you can go and pat ‘im now. Go on. Don’t be shy. OTHER: Ow! HAGRID: Nice and slow, now. Nice and slow. Slow. Not so fast, Harry. Slow down, Harry. That’s it... nice and slow. Now let ‘im come to you. That’s it. Slowly, now, slowly, slowly, that’s it... Yes! Well done! Well done, Harry! Well done! OTHER: Does he get to fly? HAGRID: I think he may let you ride 'im now. HARRY: What? HAGRID: Come on. HARRY: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey... hey! Hagrid... HAGRID: We’ll put you over here, just behind the wing joint. Don' pull out any of ‘is feathers, because he won' thank you for that. Heh, heh... HARRY: Whoah!! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake - daytime HARRY: Ha! Whoo-hoo! Whoooo-hooo!! Whoo-hoo! Oh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime HAGRID: (whistle) OTHER: Well done, Harry! HAGRID: Well done, Harry! And well done, Buckbeak! OTHER: Yeah, that was wicked, Harry! DRACO: Oh, please! HAGRID: Well done, well done. How'm I doin' me firs' day? HARRY: Brilliant... Professor. DRACO: Yes, you're not dangerous at all, are you, you great ugly brute -- HAGRID: Malfoy, Malfoy! No! Buckbeak! Whoa... whoa... whoa... whoa! Buckbeak! Away, you silly creature! DRACO: Oh, it's killed me! It's killed me! HAGRID: Calm down! It- it’s jus' a scratch... HERMIONE: Hagrid! He's got to be taken to the hospital. HAGRID: I'm the teacher. I’ll do it. DRACO: Oh! Oh! Ohhh, you’re going to regret this... HAGRID: Class dismissed! DRACO: ...you and your bloody chicken! -- Scene 11: Boggart in the wardrobe. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entryway – night GHOST: Ah-ha-ha! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - night PANSY: Does it hurt terribly, Draco? DRACO: It comes and it goes. Still... I consider myself lucky. According to Madam Pomfrey, another minute or two... and I could've, ah, lost my arm. Couldn’t possibly do any homework for weeks... RON: Listen to the idiot. He's really laying it on thick, isn't he? DRACO: Please- don’t touch it. HARRY: Yeah, but at least Hagrid didn't get fired. HERMIONE: Yeah, but I hear Draco's father's furious. We haven’t heard the end of this... SEAMUS: He's been sighted! He's been sighted! NEVILLE: Who? SEAMUS: Sirius Black! HERMIONE: Dufftown? That's not far from here... NEVILLE: You don't think he'd come to Hogwarts... do you? OTHER: With the dementors at every entrance? SEAMUS: Dementors? He's already slipped by them once, hasn't he? Who's to say he can't do it again? BEM: That's right. Black could be anywhere. It's like trying to catch smoke. Like trying to catch smoke through your bare hands. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime - LOCATION: Hogwarts – DADA Classroom - daytime LUPIN: Intriguing, isn’t it? Would anyone like to venture a guess... as to what is inside? DEAN THOMSAS: That's a Boggart, that is. LUPIN: Very good, Mr. Thomas. Now, can anybody tell me what a Boggart looks like? HERMIONE: No one knows. RON: When'd she get here? HERMIONE: Boggarts are shape-shifters. They take the shape of whatever a particular person fears the most. That's what makes them so -- LUPIN: -so terrifying, yes, yes, yes. Luckily, a very simple charm exists to repel a Boggart. Let's practice it now. Ah, without wands, please... after me... Riddikulus! STUDENTS: Riddikulus! LUPIN: Very good. A little louder, and very clear. Listen: Riddikulus! STUDENTS: Riddikulus! DRACO: This class is ridiculous. LUPIN: Very good- well, so much for the easy part. You see, the incantation alone is not enough. What really finishes a Boggart is... laughter. You need to force it to assume a shape you find truly amusing. Let me explain. Ah- Neville, would you join me, please? Come on. Don’t be shy, come on. Come on. LUPIN: Hello. Neville, what frightens you most of all? NEVILLE: Profter... S- Snafpt... LUPIN: SorryNEVILLE: Professor Snape. LUPIN: Professor Snape. Yes, frightens us all. And I believe you live with your grandmother? NEVILLE: Yes, but I don't want that Boggart to turn into her, either. LUPIN: No...It won't. I want you to picture her clothes, only her clothes, very clearly in your mind. NEVILLE: She carries a red handbag... LUPIN: We don't need to hear it. As long as you see it, we’ll see it. Now, when I open that wardrobe, here's what I want you to do... Excuse me... (whispers)Imagine Professor Snape in your grandmother’s clothes. LUPIN: Can you do that? Yes. Wand at the ready. One. Two. Three. Think, Neville. Think! NEVILLE: Riddikulus! OTHERS: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! LUPIN: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! Wonderful, Neville, wonderful! Incredible! Okay! To the back, Neville. Everyone form a line. Form a line. I want everyone to picture the thing they fear the very most, and turn it into something funny. Next! Ron! Concentrate. Face your fear. Be brave! RON: Ooh.. LUPIN: Wand at the ready, Ron. Wand at the ready! RON: Riddikulus! OTHERS: Ha, ha, ha, ha! LUPIN: Yes! You see? Very good, very good! Marvelous! Absolutely very, very enjoyable! Parvati, next! Step up. Show us what you see. Keep your nerve. Steady... PARVATI: Riddikulus! OTHERS: Ha, ha, ha, ha! LUPIN: And next! Step up, step up! Wonderful, wonderful. Heeere! Riddikulus! Right, well, sorry about that. Ah, that’s enough for today. If you’d all like to collect your books from the back of the class, that’s the end of the lesson. Thank you... Sorry, sorry, you’ve already had too much of a good thing. -- Scene 12: Talent for trouble. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – outside - daytime PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Now, remember! These visits to Hogsmeade Village are a privilege. Should your behavior reflect poorly on the school in any way, that privilege shall not be extended again. No permission form signed, no visiting the Village. That's the rule, Potter. FILCH: Those with permission follow me. Those without, stay put. HARRY: But Professor, I thought if you signed it, then I could goPROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: I can’t. Only a parent or guardian can sign. Since I am neither, it would be inappropriate. I'm sorry, Potter. That's my final word. HARRY: Forget about it guys. See you later. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Wooden bridge - daytime HARRY: Professor, can I ask you something? LUPIN: You want to know why I stopped you facing that Boggart, yes? I would’ve thought it'd be obvious. I assumed it would take the shape of Lord Voldemort. HARRY: I did think of Voldemort... at first. But then, I remembered that night on the train... and the dementor... LUPIN: Well, I'm very impressed. That suggests that what you fear the most is fear itself. This is very wise. HARRY: Before I fainted... I heard something. A woman. Screaming. LUPIN: Well, dementors force us to relive our very worst memories. Our pain becomes their power. HARRY: I think it was my mother. The night she was murdered. LUPIN: You know, the very first time I saw you, Harry, I recognized you immediately. Not by your scar, by your eyes. They're your mother Lily's. Yes. Oh, yes. I knew her. Your mother was there for me at a time when no one else was. Not only was she a singularly gifted witch, she was also an uncommonly kind woman. She had a way of seeing the beauty in others, even -- and perhaps, most especially... when that person couldn't see it in themselves... And your father, James, on the other hand, he ah, heh- He had a certain, shall we say, talent for trouble. A talent, rumor has it, he passed on to you. You’re more like them than you know, Harry. In time you’ll come to see just how much. -- Scene 13: Flight of the Fat Lady. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Moving staircase - night RON: Honeydukes Sweetshop is brilliant, but nothing beats Zonko’s Joke Shop. We never did get to go to the Shrieking Shack, though. You heard that it’s the mostHARRY: -most haunted building in Briton. Yeah, I know. What’s going on? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor Tower entrance - night RON: Probably Neville’s forgotten the password again. NEVILLE: HeyRON: Oh, you’re there! PERCY: Let me through, please. Excuse me, I'm Head Boy... Get back! All of you! No one is to enter this dormitory until it has been fully searched! GINNY: The Fat Lady... she's gone. RON: Serves her right. She was a terrible singer. HERMIONE: It’s not funny, Ron. PERCY: Keep calm, everyone. Break into fours. Back to your common room. Be quietFILCH: Make way. Make way. PERCY: The Headmaster’s here. FILCH: Come on, move! PERCY: You heard! Move! DUMBLEDORE: Mr. Filch. Round up the ghosts. Tell them to search every painting in the castle to find the Fat Lady. FILCH: There's no need for ghosts, Professor... The Fat Lady’s there. PERCY: Hey- mind where you’re going! Slow down! You listen! I’m Head Boy! OTHER: Come back here! DUMBLEDORE: Keep moving. Dear lady, who did this to you? FAT LADY: Eyes like the devil, he's got. And a soul as dark as his name. It’s him, Headmaster. The one they all talk about. He's here, somewhere in the castle! Sirius Black! Aaah-hoo-hoo! DUMBLEDORE: Secure the castle, Mr. Filch. The rest of you... to the Great Hall. -- Scene 14: Substitute teacher. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entryway - night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - night FILCH: I’ve searched the Astronomy Tower and the Owlery, sir, but there’s nothing there. DUMBLEDORE: Thank you. PROFESSOR BINNS: The third floor’s clear, to, sir. DUMBLEDORE: Very good. SNAPE: I've done the dungeons, Headmaster. No sign of Black. Nor anywhere else in the castle. DUMBLEDORE: Thank you. I didn't really expect him to linger. SNAPE: Remarkable feat, don't you think? To enter Hogwarts castle on one's own, completely undetected... DUMBLEDORE: Quite remarkable, yes. SNAPE: Any theories about how he might have managed it? DUMBLEDORE: Many, each as unlikely as the next. SNAPE: You may recall that prior to the start of term, I did express concerns about your appointment of ProfessorDUMBLEDORE: Not a single professor inside this castle would help Sirius Black enter it. No, I’m quite convinced the castle is safe. And I'm more than willing to send the students back to their Houses. SNAPE: What about Potter? Should he be warned? DUMBLEDORE: Perhaps... But for now, let him sleep... For in dreams we enter a world that’s entirely our own. Let them swim in the deepest ocean, or glide over the highest cloud. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – DADA classroom - daytime SNAPE: Turn to page three hundred and ninety-four. HARRY: Excuse me, sir... where's Professor Lupin? SNAPE: That's not really your concern, is it, Potter? Suffice it to say, your Professor finds himself incapable of teaching... at the present time. Turn to page three hundred and ninety-four! RON: ‘Werewolves?’ HERMIONE: But, sir, we've just begun learning about Red Caps and Hinkypunks. We're not meant to start nocturnal beasts for weeksSNAPE: Quiet! RON: When did she come in? Did you see her come in? SNAPE: Now. Which of you can tell me the difference between an Animagus and a werewolf? SNAPE: No one? How disappointing. HERMIONE: Please, sir. An Animagus is a wizard who elects to turn into an animal. A werewolf has no choice. With each full moon when he transforms he no longer remembers who he is. He’d kill his best friend if he crossed his path. Furthermore, the werewolf only responds only to the call of its own kind – DRACO: Owooo! SNAPE: Thank you, Mr. Malfoy. That is the second time you have spoken out of turn, Miss Granger. Are you incapable of restraining yourself, or do you take pride in being an insufferable know-it-all? RON: He's got a point, you know. SNAPE: Five points from Gryffindor! As an antidote to your ignorance, and on my desk by Monday morning, two rolls of parchment on the werewolf, with particular emphasis on recognizing it. HARRY: But, sir, it’s Quidditch tomorrow. SNAPE: Then I suggest you take extra care, Mr. Potter. Loss of limb will not excuse you. Page three hundred and ninety-four. -- Scene 15: Grim defeat. SNAPE: The term ‘werewolf’ is a contraction of the Anglo-Saxon word ‘wer’, which means ‘man’, and ‘wolf’. ‘Werewolf’, ‘man-wolf.’ There are several ways to become a werewolf. They include being given the power of shape-shifting, being bitten by a werewolf, or... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – stormy day FANS: Go, Go, Gryffindor! Go, Go Gryffindor! HERMIONE: Go, Harry! Whoo-hoo! Go, Harry! OTHERS: Eeee! Ahhh! OTHERS: Harry! DUMBLEDORE: Aresto momentum! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital Wing - daytime RON: He looks a bit peaky, doesn't he? FRED: Peaky? What d'you expect? He fell over a hundred feet. GEORGE: Yeah, c'mon, Ron. Let’s walk you off the Astronomy Tower FRED: -and see what you look like. HARRY: Probably a right sight better than he normally does. HERMIONE: How're you feeling? HARRY: Oh, brilliant. FRED: You gave us a right good scare there, mate. HARRY: What happened? RON: Well, you fell off your broom. HARRY: Really? I meant the match. Who won? HERMIONE: Um- no one blames you, Harry. The dementors aren't supposed to come inside the grounds. Dumbledore was furious. As soon as he saved you, he sent them straight off. RON: There's uh- something else you should know, too, Harry, um. When you fell, your broom– it- it sort of... blew into the Whomping Willow. And, well... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake - daytime LUPIN: I'm sorry to hear about your broomstick. -- Scene 16: The Marauder’s Map. LUPIN: Is there no chance of fixing it? HARRY: No. Professor, why do the dementors affect me so? I mean, more than everyone else... LUPIN: Listen, the dementors are amongst the foulest creatures to walk this earth. They feed on every good feeling, every happy memory, until a person is left with absolutely nothing but his worst experiences. You are not weak, Harry. The dementors affect you, most of all, because there are true horrors in your past. Horrors your classmates can scarcely imagine. You have nothing to be ashamed of. HARRY: I'm scared, Professor. LUPIN: Well, I'd consider you a fool if you weren't. HARRY: I need to know how to fight them. You could teach me. You made that dementor on the train go away... LUPIN: There was only one that night... HARRY: But you made it go away. LUPIN: I don't pretend to be an expert, Harry. But, as the dementors seem to have developed a particular interest in you, huh, perhaps I should teach you. But after the holidays. For now, I need to rest. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – winter snow - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – outside – winter snow - daytime FILCH: Last call for Hogsmeade! Come on, now! All those for Hogsmeade! Come on, now, get out of here! Come on! HARRY: Guys, let me go! FRED: Clever, Harry. GEORGE: But not clever enough. FRED: Besides, we've got a better way. HARRY: Guys, come on! I’m trying to get to Hogsmeade. FRED, GEORGE: We know. FRED: Don’t worry. GEORGE: We’ll get you there. FRED: We’ll show you a quicker way. GEORGE: If you pipe down. FRED: Ah, bless him. HARRY: Let me go! Come on, guys. Don’tGEORGE: Now, Harry. FRED/ GEORGE: Come and join the big boys. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entrance Hall - daytime HARRY: What are you doing?! FRED/ GEORGE: Sssh! HARRY: What's this rubbish? FRED: ‘What’s this rubbish?’ he says. That there is the secret to our success. GEORGE: It's a wrench giving it to you, believe me. FRED: But we've decided your need's are greater than ours. George, if you will... GEORGE: I solemnly swear that I am up to no good. HARRY: 'Messrs Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs are proud to present The Marauder's Map'...? GEORGE: We owe them so much. HARRY: Hang on. This is Hogwarts! And that... no. Is that really...? FRED: Dumbledore. GEORGE: In his study. FRED: Pacing. GEORGE: Does that a lot. HARRY: So you mean, this map shows... FRED: Everyone. HARRY: Everyone? GEORGE: Everyone. FRED: Where they are. GEORGE: What they're doing. FRED: Every minute. GEORGE: Of every day. HARRY: Brilliant! Where'd you get it? FRED: Nicked it from Filch's office, of course, first year. GEORGE: Now listen. There are seven secret passageways out of the castle. We'd recommend... FRED/GEORGE: This one. GEORGE: The One-Eyed Witch passageway. GEORGE: It’ll lead you straight to Honeydukes cellar. FRED: But you’d best hurry. Filch is heading this way. GEORGE: Oh, and, Harry? Don’t forget, when you're done, just give it a tap and say, FRED/GEORGE: 'Mischief managed.' Otherwise, anyone can read it. -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - Honeydukes Sweetshop – cellar – daytime - dark -- Scene 17: Who’s there? -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - Honeydukes Sweetshop - daytime WOMAN: Now, don’t forget these! OTHER: Now, how much do you want? SEAMUS: Delicious! -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade – main street – daytime – snowing -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - Shrieking Shack – exterior - snowing HERMIONE: It's meant to be the most haunted building in Britain. Did I mention that? RON: Twice. HERMIONE: Oh. Do you want to move a bit closer? RON: Huh? HERMIONE: To the Shrieking Shack? RON: Oh, oh, actually, I- I’m, I’m fine here. DRACO: Well, well. Look who's here. You two shopping for your new dream home? A bit grand for you, isn’t it, Weasel-Bee? Don't your family sleep in, ah- one room? RON: Shut your mouth, Malfoy. DRACO: Ooh- not very friendly. Boys, I think it’s time we teach Weasel-Bee how to respect his superiors. HERMIONE: Oh, ha, ha. I hope you don't mean yourself. DRACO: How dare you talk to me, you filthy, little mudblood! -- Who is there?! Don't just stand there! Do something! CRABBE: What? CRABBE: Ahh! Ahhhh! MALFOY: Ahhh! RON: What’s up, Malfoy? Lost your skis? DRACO: Get out of the way! Move! OTHER: Malfoy! Wait! Wait! HERMIONE: Harry! RON: Bloody hell, Harry! That was not funny! HARRY AND HERMIONE: Ha, ha, ha, ha! -- Scene 18: I hope he finds me. -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade – main Street – daytime - snowing RON: Those weasels! Never told me about any Marauder's Map! HERMIONE: But Harry isn't going to keep it. He's going to turn it over to Professor MCGONAGALL, aren't you? RON: Oh, sure. Along with his invisibility cloak? HERMIONE: Oh, look who it is. Madam Rosmerta. Ron fancies her. RON: It's not true! CORNELIUS FUDGE: Professor McGonagall! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Cornelius! HAGRID: Allow me, Minister. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Oh, Hagrid... HAGRID: Sorry abou’ that! CORNELIUS FUDGE: Rosmerta, m'dear! I hope business is good? MADAM ROSMERTA: It'd be a lot better if the Ministry wasn't sending dementors into my pub every other night! CORNELIUS FUDGE: We..have...we have a killer on the loose. MADAM ROSMERTA: Oh, Sirius Black? In Hogsmeade! And what would bring him here? CORNELIUS FUDGE: Harry Potter. MADAM ROSMERTA: Harry Potter?! CORNELIUS FUDGE: Ssh! Come. HERMIONE: Harry! -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - Three Broomsticks Pub – interior - daytime SHRUNKEN HEAD #1: I say, no underage wizards allowed in today! SHRUNKEN HEAD #2: Shut the damn door! HERMIONE: So rude! RON: Thick heads. SHRUNKEN HEAD #2: Thick heads?! SRUNKEN HEAD #1: How dare they! Who are they calling thick heads? SHRUNKEN HEAD #2: Young whippersnappers! -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - Three Broomsticks Pub – upstairs Card Room - daytime MADAM ROSEMERTA: Nobody’s going to come to a pub where they’ll get scared out of their wits. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Well, Professor Dumbledore doesn’t want dementors around the place, I can assure you. MADAM ROSMERTA: Now, tell me what this is all about. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Well, now years ago, when Harry Potter's parents realized they were marked for death, do you remember? They went into hiding. Few knew where they were. One who did was Sirius Black. And he told You-Know-Who. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Not only did Black lead You-Know-Who to the Potters that night, but he also killed one of their friends, Peter Pettigrew! MADAM ROSMERTA: Peter Pettigrew? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Yes, little lump of a boy? Always trailing after Sirius Black and... MADAM ROSMERTA: I remember him. Never let James and Sirius out of his sight. But what happened? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Well, Peter Pettigrew tried to warn the Potters, and might have managed to, had he not run into an old friend, Sirius Black. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Black was vicious. He didn't kill Pettigrew. He destroyed him! A finger. That's all that was left. A finger– nothing else. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Yes. Sirius Black may not have put his hands to the Potters, but he's the reason they're dead. CORNELIUS FUDGE: And now he wants to finish what he started. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Uh-huh. MADAM ROSMERTA: I don’t believe it... CORNELIUS FUDGE: Huh- that's not the worst of it. MADAM ROSMERTA: What could be worse? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: This: Sirius Black was, and remains to this day... Harry Potter's godfather! -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade – main street – daytime - snowing HERMIONE: Ron, look! Sorry, sorry! Excuse me... excuse me, sorry... -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade – woods – daytime - snowing HERMIONE: Harry, what happened? HARRY: He was their friend... and he betrayed them. He was their friend! I hope he finds me. Because when he does, I'm going to be ready! When he does, I'm gonna kill him! -- Scene 19: The Patronus. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Astronomy Classroom - daytime LUPIN: Harry. There you are. You came. LUPIN: Now, are you sure about this, Harry? You know this is very advanced magic, well beyond Ordinary Wizarding Level. HARRY: I’m sure. LUPIN: Well, everything is prepared. Now, the spell I'm going to try to teach you is called the Patronus Charm. Did you ever hear of it? No? Well... a Patronus is a kind of positive force, and for the wizard who can conjure one, it works something like a shield, with the dementor feeding on it rather than him. But in order for it to work, you need think of a memory. And not just any memory, a very happy memory. A very powerful memory. Can you do this? Yes. Very well. Close your eyes... concentrate... explore your past... Do you have a memory? Allow it to fill you up... Lose yourself within it... Then speak the incantation: Expecto Patronum. HARRY: Expecto Patronum... LUPIN: Very good. Shall we? Wand at the ready. HARRY: Expecto Patronum! Expecto... Expecta... Expect... --- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Astronomy Classroom – daytime - later LUPIN: Here we go. Come on. Sit up. Deep breaths. It’s alright. I didn’t expect you to do it the first time. Huh- that would have been remarkable! Here, eat this. You’ll feel better. HARRY: That's one nasty dementor. LUPIN: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. That was a Boggart, Harry. A Boggart. The real thing would be worse. Much, much worse. As a matter of interest, what were you thinking? Which memory did you choose? HARRY: The first time I rode a broom. LUPIN: Well, that's not good enough. Not nearly good enough. HARRY: There's another. It's not happy, exactly. Well, it is. It's the happiest I've ever felt. Uh, but it's complicated. LUPIN: Is it strong? Then let's give it a try. Do you feel ready? HARRY: Just do it. HARRY: Expecto Patronum! Expecto Patronum! LUPIN: Ha, ha, ha, ah, ha! Yes! Well done, Harry. Well done! HARRY: I think I've had enough. For today. LUPIN: Yes, sit down. Here. Eat this, it helps. It really helps. And just so you know, Harry: I think you would have given your father a run for his money. And that... is saying something. HARRY: I was thinking of him. And Mum. Seeing their faces. They were talking to me. Just talking. That’s the memory I chose. I don't even know if it's real... But it's the best I have. -- Scene 20: Seeing the impossible. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entrance – exterior - daytime HERMIONE: Beautiful day. RON: Gorgeous. Unless, of course, you’ve been ripped to pieces! HARRY: Ripped to pieces? What are you talking about? HERMIONE: Ronald has lost his rat. RON: I haven’t lost anything! Your cat killed him! HERMIONE: Rubbish! RON: Harry, you’ve seen the way that bloodthirsty beast of hers is always lurkin’ about. And Scabbers is gone! HERMIONE: Well, maybe you should learn to take better care of your pets! RON: Your cat killed him! HERMIONE: Did not! RON: Did. HERMIONE: Didn’t. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – shoreline - daytime HERMIONE: How'd it go, Hagrid? At the hearing? HAGRID: Well, first off, the committee members took turns talkin’ abou’ why we were there. And then I got up an' did my piece – said how Buckbeak was a good Hippogriff, always cleaned his feathers. And then Lucius Malfoy got up an', well you can imagine, he said “Buckbeak was a deadly and dangerous creature who would kill ya as soon as look at ya.” HERMIONE: And then? HAGRID: An’ then he asked for the worst, he did, ol’ Lucius. RON: They’re not sacking you! HAGRID: No, I’m not sacked. Buckbeak's been sentenced ter death! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor Tower – boys’ dormitory - night RON: Oh, ah- Spiders! T-there’s spiders. Spiders. They want me to tap dance. I don’ wanna tap dance. HARRY: You tell those spiders, Ron. RON: Oh, yeah. T- t- tell them. I’ll tell ‘em... I’ll tell ‘em... MADAM ROSEMERTA: (echo) Peter Pettigrew? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: (echo) Little lump of a boy. Always trailing after Sirius Black... CORNELIUS FUDGE: (echo) Black was vicious. He didn't kill Pettigrew. He destroyed him! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor – night - dark PORTRAIT #1: Put that light out! HARRY: Sorry! Ah! PORTRAIT #2: Watch it there, boy! PORTRAIT #3: We’re trying to sleep here! PORTRAIT #2: Yes, we are! HARRY: Mischief managed! Nox! SNAPE: Potter. What're you doing wandering the corridors at night? HARRY: I was sleepwalking... SNAPE: How extraordinarily like your father you are, Potter. He, too, was exceedingly arrogant. Strutting about the castleHARRY: My dad didn’t strut. And nor do I. Now, if you don't mind, I would appreciate it if you could lower your wand. SNAPE: Turn out your pockets. Turn out your pockets! SNAPE: What’s this. HARRY: Spare bit of parchment... SNAPE: Really... Open it. Reveal your secrets! Read it. HARRY: 'Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs offer their compliments to Professor Snape and...' SNAPE: Go on. HARRY: '... and request that he keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business.' SNAPE: Why you insolent littleLUPIN: Professor...? SNAPE: Well, well. Lupin. Out for a little walk in the moonlight, are we? LUPIN: Harry? Are you all right? SNAPE: That remains to be seen. I have just now confiscated a rather curious artifact from Mr. Potter. Take a look, Lupin. This is supposed to be your area of expertise. Clearly, it's full of Dark Magic. LUPIN: I seriously doubt it, Severus. It looks to me as if it is merely a parchment designed to insult anyone who tries to read it. I suspect it's a Zonko product. Nevertheless, I shall pursue any hidden qualities it may possess. It is, after all, as you say, my area of expertise. Harry, would you come with me, please? Professor, good night. PORTRAIT #1: Are you deaf? Put that light out! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Lupin’s office – night - dark LUPIN: Come in. Now, I haven’t the faintest idea, Harry, how this map came to be in your possession, but quite frankly, I am astounded that you didn't hand it in. Did it never occur to you that this- in the hands of Sirius Black- is a map to you? No. HARRY: No, sir. LUPIN: You know, your father never set much store by the rules either. But he and your mother gave their lives to save yours. And gambling their sacrifice by wandering around the castle unprotected, with a killer on the loose, seems to me to be a pretty poor way to repay them! Now, I will not cover up for you again, Harry. Do you hear me? HARRY: Yes, sir. LUPIN: I want you to return to your dormitory and stay there. And don’t take any detours. If you do, I shall know. HARRY: Professor. Just so you know, I don't think the map always works. Earlier on, it showed someone in the castle. Someone I know to be dead. LUPIN: Oh, really? Who might that be? HARRY: Peter Pettigrew. LUPIN: That’s not possible. HARRY: It’s just what I saw... Good night, Professor. -- Scene 21: Professor Trelawney’s prediction. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Divination classroom - daytime PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Broaden your minds... You must look beyond... The art of crystal-gazing is in the clearing of the Inner Eye. Only then, can you see. Try again. Now, what do we have here...? RON: (snoring)...Huh? HERMIONE: Oh, ah- do you mind me trying? PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Ah! HERMIONE: The Grim. Possibly. PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: My dear, from the first moment you stepped foot in my class, I sensed that you did not possess the proper spirit for the noble art of Divination. No, you see, there. Ah, you may be young in years, but the heart that beats beneath your bosom is as shriveled as an old maid's, your soul as dry as the pages of the books to which you so desperately cleave. OTHER: What’s happened? I can’t believe it! PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Have I said something? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Divination Tower – Spiral staircase RON: She's gone mental, Hermione has. I mean, not that she wasn't always mental, but now it's out in the open for everyone to see... HARRY: Hang on- we’d better take this back. RON: I’m not goin’ back. HARRY: Fine. See you later. RON: See you. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Divination classroom - daytime CRYSTAL BALL: Harry Potter... Harry Potter... PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Ahh! HARRY: Professor TrelawneyPROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: He will return tonight.... HARRY: Sorry? PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY (channeling): Tonight, he who betrayed his friends, whose heart rots with murder, shall break free. Innocent blood shall be spilt, and servant and Master shall be reunited once more... ah, ach... PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Oh- I’m so sorry, dear boy. Did you say something? HARRY: No. Nothing. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Divination Tower – Spiral staircase - daytime -- Scene 22: Witness to an execution. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entrance - exterior – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – wooden bridge - daytime HERMIONE: I can't believe they're going to kill Buckbeak! It's just too horrible. HARRY: It just got worse. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime DRACO: Did I tell you? Father said I can keep the hippogriff’s head. I think I’ll donate it to the Gryffindor’s common room. CRABBE: Wicked. DRACO: Oh, this is going to be rich. CRABBE: Look who’s here. DRACO: Ah. Come to see the show? HERMIONE: You! You... foul... loathsome... evil... little cockroach! RON: Hermione! No! He's not worth it. DRACO: He, he, heh... oh! CRABBE: Malfoy, you okay? Let’s go. GOYLE: Quick! DRACO: Not a word to anyone, understood? HERMIONE: That felt good. RON: Not good, brilliant! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – exterior - daytime HAGRID: Ow, look at 'im. Loves the smell o' the trees when the wind blows through ‘em... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – window - daytime HARRY: Why don’t we just set him free? HAGRID: Ah- they'd know it was me. And then Dumbledore’d get into trouble. He’s commin’ down, yeh know, Dumbledore. Says he wants ter be with me when they... when it happens. Great man, Dumbledore. Great man. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – interior - daytime HERMIONE: We'll stay with you too, Hagrid. HAGRID: You’ll do no such thing! Ya think I wan' yeh seein' sumthing like that? No. Yeh just drink yer tea an' be off. Oh, but before yeh do- Ron... RON: Scabbers! You're alive! HAGRID: Ye’ll want to keep a closer eye on yer pets, Ron. HERMIONE: I think that means you owe someone an apology. RON: Right. Next time I see Crookshanks, I'll let him know. HERMIONE: I meant me! HAGRID: Blimey! Wha’ was that? HARRY: Ow! Ah... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – window - daytime HARRY: Hagrid... HAGRID: Oh, crikey! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – outside - daytime DUMBLEDORE: Now, Minister, over this way... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – window - daytime HAGRID: It’s late. It’s nearly dark. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – interior - daytime HAGRID: Yeh shouldn’t be here. Someone sees yeh outside the castle this time o’ night, you'll be in trouble! Big trouble! Particularly you, Harry – Be with you in a moment! Quick! Quick! HARRY: Hagrid. It’ll be fine. It’ll be okay. HAGRID: Go on, go on! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – exterior - daytime DUMBLEDORE: That’s the ling you see over there... CORNELIUS FUDGE: On the slope... DUMBLEDORE: ...on the slope- Ah, Hagrid, HAGRID: Professor Dumbledore. DUMBLEDORE: Good evening, Hagrid. HAGRID: Just make your way through, ah. Have some tea, if you like. CORNELIUS FUDGE: No, Hagrid, no. Gentlemen... DUMBLEDORE: I’d like a cup of tea. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Well, I think we should get down to our business, shall we? Very well. It is the decision of the Committee for the Disposal of Dangerous Creatures that the hippogriff known as Buckbeak, hereinafter called ‘the condemned’, shall be executed this day at sundown. HAGRID: Dear, dear... DUMBLEDORE: Now, now, Hagrid, now come on. All right. It’ll be all right. CORNELIUS FUDGE: The executioner shall be dispatched... HARRY: What? HERMIONE: I just thought I saw... Never mind. RON: Let’s go! HAGRID: Buckbeak didn’t mean no harm! -- Scene 23: The Whomping Willow. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime RON: Oh! Oh, no... Hah- he bit me! Scabbers! HERMIONE: Ron. Ron! No! HARRY: Ron! RON: Scabbers, come back! HARRY: Wait! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow - dusk RON: Scabbers, you bit me! HERMIONE: Harry. You do realize what tree this is... RON: Now behave yourself. HARRY: That's not good. Ron, run! RON: Harry! Hermione, Run! It’s the Grim! RON: Aaaahhh! Harry! HARRY: Ron! Ron, wait! HERMIONE: Ron! RON: Haaarry! Help! HARRY: Ron! Ron. Ron! HERMIONE: Ron! RON: Harry! HARRY AND HERMIONE: Uumph! RON: Aaah! HARRY: Come on! Move! HERMIONE: Duck! Aaaaeee! Aeeeeee! Oh! Oh! Harry! Oh! HARRY: Aaah! Umph! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow – underground - dark HERMIONE: Oh, I’m sorry! HARRY: Don’t worry. HERMIONE: Where do you suppose this goes? HARRY: I have a hunch. I just hope I'm wrong... -- Scene 24: Sirius Black. -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade – Shrieking Shack – first floor - dark HERMIONE: We're in the Shrieking Shack, aren't we? HARRY: Come on. -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade – Shrieking Shack – upstairs - dark HARRY: Ron! HERMIONE: Ron! You okay? HARRY: The dog- where's is it? RON: Harry! It's a trap! He's the dog. He's an Animagus... HERMIONE: If you want to kill Harry, you'll have to kill us, too! SIRIUS: No. Only one will die tonight. HARRY: Then it'll be you! SIRIUS: Ha, Ha! Ha, ha, ha! Are you going to kill me, Harry? LUPIN: Expelliarmus! HARRY, HERMIONE, RON: Professor Lupin! LUPIN: Well, well, Sirius, looking a bit ragged, aren't we? Finally the flesh reflects the madness within. SIRIUS: Well, you'd know all about the madness within, wouldn't you, Remus? SIRIUS: I found him! LUPIN: I know. SIRIUS: It’s him! LUPIN: I understand. SIRIUS: Let’s kill him! HERMIONE: No! I trusted you! And all this time you've been his friend! He's a werewolf! That's why he's been missing classes! LUPIN: How long have you known? HERMIONE: Since Professor Snape set the essay. LUPIN: Well, well, well, Hermione, you really are the brightest witch of your age I've ever met. SIRIUS: Enough talk, Remus! Come on, let’s kill him! LUPIN: Wait-- SIRIUS: I did my waiting! Twelve years of it! In Azkaban! LUPIN: Very well. Kill him! But wait one more minute. Harry has the right to know why. HARRY: I know why. You betrayed my parents! You’re the reason they’re dead. LUPIN: No, Harry, it wasn’t him. Somebody did betray your parents, but it was somebody who, until quite recently, I believed to be dead. HARRY: Who was it then? SIRIUS: Peter Pettigrew! And he’s in this room! Right now! Come out, come out, Peter. Come out, come out and play... SNAPE: Expelliarmus! Ah, vengeance is sweet. How I hoped I'd be the one to catch you. LUPIN: SeverusSNAPE: I told Dumbledore you were helping your old friend into the castle. And now, here's the proof. SIRIUS: Brilliant, Snape! Once again you’ve put your keen and penetrating mind to the task and, as usual, come to the wrong conclusion. Now, if you’ll excuse us, Remus and I have some unfinished business to attend to. SNAPE: Give me a reason. I beg you! LUPIN: Severus, don't be a fool! SIRIUS: He can't help it. It's habit by now. LUPIN: Sirius, be quiet! SIRIUS: Be quiet, yourself, Remus! SNAPE: Listen to you two. Quarreling like an old married couple. SIRIUS: Why don’t you just run along and play with your chemistry set? SNAPE: I could do it, you know. But why deny the dementors? They’re so longing to see you. Do I detect a flicker of fear? Oh, yes. A dementor’s kiss. One can only imagine what that must be like to endure. It's said to be nearly unbearable to witness, but I'll do my best. LUPIN: Severus, pleaseSNAPE: After you. HARRY: Expelliarmus! -- Scene 25: Peter Petigrew. RON: Harry. What did you just do? HERMIONE: You attacked a teacher! HARRY: Tell me about Peter Pettigrew. LUPIN: He was at school with us. We thought he was our friend. HARRY: No. Pettigrew's dead. He killed him! LUPIN: No he didn’t! I thought so, too, until you mentioned seeing Pettigrew on the Map! HARRY: The Map was lying thenSIRIUS: The Map never lies! Pettigrew's alive, and he's right there! RON: M- me? He’s mental! SIRIUS: Not you, y-. Your rat! RON: Scabbers has been in my family for yeSIRIUS: Twelve years. A curiously long life for a common garden rat. He's missing a toe, isn't he? RON: So what? HARRY: All they could find of Pettigrew was hisSIRIUS: -finger! The dirty coward cut it off so everyone would think he was dead. And then he transformed into a rat. HARRY: Show me. Give it to him, Ron. RON: What are you going to do to him? Scabbers! Leave him alone! Get off him! What are you doing? Scabbers! PETTIGREW: Aaaah! R- Remus... S- Sirius... My old friends! H- Harry! Look at you! Y- you look just like your father. Like James. We were the best of friends, he and ISIRIUS: How dare you speak to Harry! How dare you talk about James in front of him! LUPIN: You sold James and Lily to Voldemort, didn’t you?! PETTIGREW: I didn't mean to! The Dark Lord, you have no idea the weapons he possesses! Ask yourself, Sirius, what you would have done? What would you have done? SIRIUS: I would have died! I would have died rather than betray my friends! PETTIGREW: Harry, James wouldn’t have wanted me killed! Your dad- Your dad would have spared me! He would have shown me mercy! LUPIN: You should have realized, Peter, that if Voldemort didn’t kill you, then we would. Together! HARRY: No! LUPIN: Harry, this man is... HARRY: I know what he is. But we'll take him to the castle. PETTIGREW: Bless you, boy! Bless youHARRY: Get off! I said we'd take you to the castle. After that, the dementors can have you. --Scene 26: Friends become foes. -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - Tunnel from Hogwarts - dark SIRIUS: Sorry about the bite. I reckon that twinges a bit. RON: A bit? A bit? You almost tore my leg off! SIRIUS: Well, I was going for the rat. Normally, I have a very sweet disposition as a dog. In fact, more than once James suggested that I make the change permanent. The tail I could live with, but the fleas, they’re murder. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow - night HARRY: Okay... Okay. RON: You’ve gotta go. HARRY: No, no- don’t worry. That’s fine, I’ll stay. HERMIONE: You go, I’ll stay. HARRY: You okay? RON: I’m fine. Go. HERMIONE: Ah- that looks really painful. RON: So painful... they, ah, they might chop it... HERMIONE: I’m sure Madam Pomfrey’ll fix it in a heartbeat. RON: It’s too late. It’s ruined. It’ll have to be chopped off. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow - looking towards Hogwarts Castle - night SIRIUS: It’s beautiful, isn’t it? I’ll never forget the first time I walked through those doors. It’ll be nice to do it again as a free man. That was a noble thing you did back there. He doesn’t deserve it. HARRY: Well, I just didn’t think my dad would have wanted his two best friends to become killers. Besides, dead, the truth dies with him. Alive... you're free. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow - night PETTIGREW: Turn me into a maggot. A dung beetle. A Flobberworm! Anything but the dementors... Ron! Haven't I been a good friend? A good pet? You won't let them give me to the dementors, will you? I was your rat! PETTIGREW: Sweet girl. Clever girl. Surely you won't let them... LUPIN: Get away from her! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow - looking towards Hogwarts Castle - night SIRIUS: I don't know if you know, Harry, but when you were born, James and Lily made me your godfather... HARRY: I know. SIRIUS: And, well, I can understand if you choose to stay with your aunt and uncle, but, if you ever wanted a different homeHARRY: What? Come and live with you? SIRIUS: Well, it’s- it’s just a thought. I can understand if you don’t want to. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow - night HERMIONE: Harry! SIRIUS: Remus, my old friend... have you taken your potion tonight? You know the man you truly are, Remus! This heart is where you truly live! This heart! Here! Remus, this flesh is only flesh! HARRY: Expelliarmus! HERMIONE: Harry! SIRIUS: Remus! Remus! Run! Run! HARRY: Come on! HERMIONE: Wait! Wait! RON: Hermione! Bad idea. Bad idea. Bad idea. HERMIONE: Professor? Professor Lupin? RON: Nice doggy. Nice doggy... SNAPE: There you are, Potter! HERMIONE: Aee! HARRY: Sirius! SNAPE: Come back here, Potter! -- Scene 27: The Dementor’s kiss. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake - night HARRY: Sirius! No! Sirius! SIRIUS: Whoa... HARRY: Expecto... Patronum! Expecto... Patronum... -- Scene 28: Hermione’s secret. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital Wing - night HERMIONE: Harry? HARRY: I saw my dad. HERMIONE: What...? HARRY: He sent the dementors away... I saw him across the lake... HERMIONE: Listen, Harry. They've captured Sirius. Any minute the dementors are going to perform the Kiss. HARRY: You mean they’re going to kill him? HERMIONE: No. It’s worse. They’re going to suck out his soul. Headmaster! You've got to stop them! They've got the wrong man! HARRY: It's true, sir. Sirius is innocentRON: It's Scabbers who did it! DUMBLEDORE: Scabbers...? RON: He’s my rat, sir. He's not really a rat. Well, he was a rat. He was my brother Percy's rat— but then they gave him an owl, and I gotHERMIONE: The point is... we know the truth. Please, believe us. DUMBLEDORE: I do, Miss Granger. But I'm sorry to say the word of three thirteen year-old wizards will convince few others. A child's voice, however honest and true, is meaningless to those who have forgotten how to listen. (bong, bong, bong, bong, bong, bong, bong, bong, bong, bong) DUMBLEDORE: A mysterious thing, time. Powerful. And, when meddled with... dangerous. Sirius Black is in the topmost cell of the Dark Tower. You know the laws, Miss Granger. You must not be seen. And you would do well, I feel, to return before this last chime. If not... the consequences are too ghastly to discuss. If you succeed tonight, more than one innocent life may be spared. Three turns should do it, I think. Oh, by the way, when in doubt, I find retracing my steps to be a wise place to begin... Good luck. RON: What the bloody hell was all that all about? HERMIONE: Sorry, Ron. But seeing as you can't walk... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital Wing – after time reversal – daytime (bong, bong, bong) HARRY: What just happened? Where's Ron? HERMIONE: It’s seven-thirty. Where were we at seven-thirty? HARRY: I dunno... going to Hagrid's? HERMIONE: Come on! And we can't be seen! HARRY: Hermione! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – wooden bridge - daytime HARRY: Hermione! Hermione, wait! Hermione, will you please tell me what it is we're doing? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds - daytime DRACO: (past) Ah. Come to see the show? HERMIONE: (past) You foul, loathsome, evil little cockroach! HARRY: But that... that's us. RON: (past) Hermione, no! He’s not worth it! HARRY: This is not normal! HERMIONE: This is a Time-Turner, Harry. McGonagall gave it to me first term. This is how I've been getting to my lessons all year. HARRY: You mean, we've gone back in time? HERMIONE: Yes. Dumbledore obviously wanted us to return to this moment. Clearly, something happened he wants us to change. HARRY: Good punch. HERMIONE: Thanks. Malfoy's coming! OTHER: (past) Come on, let’s go! Run! Wait for me! Run! DRACO: (past) Not a word of this to anyone, understood! OTHER: (past) Okay! DRACO: (past) I'm gonna get that jumped-up Mudblood! Mark my words... HERMIONE: (past) That felt good! RON: (past) Not good. Brilliant! HARRY: (past) Come on. We should be at Hagrid’s. -- Scene 29: Onlookers to the rescue. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut - exterior HARRY: Look. Buckbeak's still alive. HERMIONE: Of course! Remember what Dumbledore said. If we succeed, more than one innocent life could be spared. Let’s go! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut - exterior HAGRID: (past) ...Great man, Dumbledore, great man. HARRY: Here they come. I’d better hurry. HERMIONE: Fudge has to see Buckbeak before we steal him. Otherwise, he'll think Hagrid set him free. RON: (past) Scabbers! You’re alive! HAGRID: (past) Keep a closer eye on your pet... HARRY: That's PettigrewHERMIONE: Harry! You can't! HARRY: Hermione, that's the man who betrayed my parents! You don't expect me to just sit here... HERMIONE: Yes! You must! Harry, you're in Hagrid's hut now. If you just go bursting in, you'll think you've gone mad. Awful things happen to wizards who meddle with time, Harry. We can't be seen. HERMIONE: Fudge is coming and... we aren’t leaving... why aren't we leaving? DUMBLEDORE: (past) There are many changes I think on the grounds... HARRY: Are you mad? HARRY: (past) Ow! HARRY: That hurt. HERMIONE: Sorry. C'mon. We're coming out the back door. Go! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s Hut – exterior - woods CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) 'It is the decision of the Committee for the Disposal of Dangerous Creatures that the Hippogriff Buckbeak, hereafter called the condemned, shall be executed this day at sundown...' HERMIONE: Is that really what my hair looks like from the back? HARRY: Shhh! RON: (past) Blimey. HARRY: (past) What? HERMIONE: (past) Nothing, I just thought I saw... Never mind. RON: (past) Let’s go! CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) “The executioner shall dispatch the condemned...” DUMBLEDORE: (past) I really think the minister might feel it in his heart to have a change of heart... HERMIONE: Okay, go, Harry! Go! CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) It seems the decision has been made, Dumbledore, nothing you nor I can do... HARRY: Get off! Get away! Get off! DUMBLEDORE: (past) Minister, do you really want to cut off the head of the hippogriff? CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) No, I do not. HARRY: C'mon, Buckbeak. Come on... CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) 'As witnessed below.' Sign, just here... You sign here, Hagrid. “The executioner, acting on behalf of the Committee...” Very well, gentlemen. Shall we step outside... DUMBLEDORE: (past) Ah, ah, Minister. I really think I should sign as well... CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) Yes, very well. Perhaps it would be a good thing if you... HARRY: Okay, Buckbeak. Come on quickly. Come with us, now. Come on! HERMIONE: Keep trying. Come on! Quickly! HARRY: Buckbeak. Okay? Quickly. Hurry up. Okay? CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) ...right here on the line, your name only. DUMBLEDORE: (past) It is a very long name... HARRY: Hurry up now, Buckbeak, okay? HERMIONE: Come on. Come on, Buckbeak. Come and get the nice dead ferret... come on, it’s here, come on Beaky. DUMBLEDORE: (past) Here we are Minister, follow me... now look there, see... CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) Where? DUMBLEDORE: (past) Look, beyond the rocks. CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) What am I supposed to see? DUMBLEDORE: (past) Professor Dippet had that ling planted when he was Headmaster... CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) Oh, yes, indeed, indeed. DUMBLEDORE: (past) And all the strawberries, you see... CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) Strawberries, I see no strawberries. DUMBLEDORE: (past) Over there. CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) Where? DUMBLEDORE: (past) Over there. Look. HERMIONE: This way! CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) Well, let's get this over with, please. DUMBLEDRE: (past) All right. CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) But, where is it? I just saw the beast, just now – not a moment ago! DUMBLEDORE: (past) How extraordinary! HAGRID: (past) Buckbeak? CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) Oh, come now, Dumbledore. Someone's obviously released him. Hagrid? HAGRID: (past) Professor, I didn't! DUMBLEDORE: (past) I don’t think the Minister’s suggesting that you had anything to do with this, Hagrid. After all, how could you? Well, you've been with us all the time. HAGRID:(past) Well- right! CORNELIUS FUDGE: (past) Well, well... We must search the grounds- DUMBLEDORE: (past) Well, search the skies if you must, Minister. Meanwhile, I’d like a nice cup of tea. Or... a large brandy. Oh, executioner, your services are no longer required. Thank you. HAGRID: (past) You’ll find no small glasses in this house, Professor, heh, heh. -- Scene 30: Saving lives. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dark Forest - night HERMIONE: Come on. HARRY: This way. HERMIONE: Come on this way. Come on. HARRY: This way, now. HARRY: Now what? HERMIONE: We save Sirius. HARRY: How? HERMIONE: No idea. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow - night HERMIONE: Look. It's Lupin. LUPIN: (past) Immobililus! HERMIONE: And Snape’s coming. HARRY: And now we wait. HERMIONE: And now we wait. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Whomping Willow – night - later HERMIONE: At least someone's enjoying himself. HARRY: Yeah. Hermione... HERMIONE: Yeah? HARRY: Before, down by the lake, when I was with Sirius... I did see someone... that someone made the dementors go away... HERMIONE: With a Patronus. I heard Snape telling Dumbledore. According to him, only a really powerful wizard could have conjured it. HARRY: It was my dad. It was my dad who conjured the Patronus. HERMIONE: But, Harry, your dad's... HARRY: Dead. I know. I'm just telling you what I saw. HERMIONE: Here we come. HARRY: You see Sirius talking to me there? HERMIONE: Uh-huh. HARRY: He's asking me to come live with him. HERMIONE: That’s great. HARRY: When we free him, I'll never have to go back to the Dursley's. It’ll just be me and him. We could live in the country. Someplace you can see the sky. I think he'll like that after all those years in Azkaban. HERMIONE: (past) Harry! SIRIUS: (past) Run! Run! HARRY: Let’s go! HERMIONE: Ow-oooooh! HARRY: What are you doing? HERMIONE: Saving your life. HERMIONE: Ow-oooooh! HARRY: Thanks. Great. Now he’s coming for us. HERMIONE: Yeah, I didn’t think about that. Run! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dark Forest - night HERMIONE: Ah! That was so scary! HARRY: Poor Professor Lupin’s having a really tough night! --Scene 31: Truly seen, truly free. HARRY: Sirius. Come on! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake - night HERMIONE: This is horrible... HARRY: Don't worry. My dad will come... he'll conjure the Patronus... any minute now... right there... you’ll see... HERMIONE: Harry, listen to me. No one's coming... HARRY: Don’t worry, he will. He will come! HARRY: SiriusHERMIONE: You're dying... both of you... HERMIONE: Harry! HARRY: Expecto Patronum! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - flying on Buckbeak - night HARRY: You were right, Hermione. It wasn't my dad I saw earlier. It was me! I saw myself conjuring the Patronus before. I knew I could do it this time, because... well, I'd already done it. Does that make sense? HERMIONE: No! But I don't like flying- aeee! HARRY: Whoo-hoo! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – outside Dark Tower - night HERMIONE: Bombarda! LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - flying on Buckbeak - night SIRIUS: Ha-ha-ha! Ha, haa, ha, ha! HARRY: Whoo-hoo! Whoo-whoo-whoo-hoo! Whooo! -- Scene 32: Two places at once. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – hallway - night SIRIUS: I'll be forever grateful for this... to both of you. HARRY: I want to go with you. SIRIUS: One day, perhaps. For some time my life will be too unpredictable. And besides, you're meant to be here. HARRY: But, you’re innocent. SIRIUS: And you know it. And for now, that’ll do. HERMIONE: Down, Buckbeak. SIRIUS: I expect you’re tired of hearing this... but you look so like your father. Except your eyes... you haveHARRY: My mother’s eyes. SIRIUS: It’s cruel that I got to spend so much time with James and Lily, and you so little... But know this- the ones that love us never really leave us, and you can always find them... in here. SIRIUS: You really are the brightest witch of your age. (bong, bong, bong) HERMIONE: We have to go. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital Wing – corridor - night (bong, bong, bong) DUMBLEDORE: Well? HARRY: He's free- we did it. DUMBLEDORE: Did what? Good night. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hospital Wing - night RON: How'd you get there? I was just talking to you there... and now you’re there! HERMIONE: What’s he talking about, Harry? HARRY: I don’t know. Honestly, Ron, how can somebody be in two places at once? -- Scene 33: Mischief managed. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Weeping Willow - daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Professor Lupin’s office - daytime LUPIN: Hello, Harry. I saw you coming. I've looked worse, believe me. HARRY: You've been sacked. LUPIN: No. No, I resigned, actually. HARRY: Resigned? Why? LUPIN: Well, it seems that somebody let slip the nature of my condition. This time tomorrow, the owls will start arriving and parents will not want a, ahwell, someone like me teaching their children. HARRY: But DumbledoreLUPIN: Dumbledore has already risked enough on my behalf. Besides, people like me are,... well... let's just say that I'm used to it by now. Why do you look so miserable, Harry? HARRY: None of it made any difference. Pettigrew escaped. LUPIN: Didn’t make any difference? Harry, it made all the difference in the world. You helped uncover the truth. You saved an innocent man from a terrible fate. It made a great deal of difference. If I am proud of anything, it is of how much you have learned this year. Now, since I am no longer your teacher, I feel no guilt whatsoever about giving this back to you. So now, I’ll say goodbye, Harry. I feel sure we’ll meet again sometime. Until then... mischief managed. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – DADA classroom - daytime -- Scene 34: The Firebolt. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entryway – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - daytime RON: Stand back, I said! Or- or I'll take it upstairs if you don't settle! NEVILLE: Harry! Wherever did you get it! SEAMUS: Can I have a go, Harry? After you, of course– HARRY: What are you talking about? RON: Quiet! Let the man through. RON: I- I didn’t mean to open it, Harry. It ah, i- ah- it was badly wrapped. They made me do it! FRED AND GEORGE: Did not! FRED: It’s a Firebolt. GEORGE: It’s the fastest broom in the world. HARRY: For me? But, who sent it? RON: No one knows. HERMIONE: But this came with it. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - Entrance - daytime OTHER: Let’s see what it will do! OTHER: ...has to win the Quidditch Cup now! SEAMUS: Go on, Harry. NEVILLE: Yeah. Let's see. OTHER: How fast is it Harry? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - daytime HARRY: Whoaaaaahhhh! Ha ha! -- THE END -- Scene 35: End credits map. -- HARRY: Lumos! I solemnly swear that I’m up to no good. END CREDITS

HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE -- Scene 1: The Riddle House -- LOCATION: Riddle House - graveyard – night NAGINI: Ssssh...hayasha... TITLE -- LOCATION: Riddle House - Caretaker’s cottage – exterior - night -- LOCATION: Riddle House - Caretaker’s cottage – kitchen RADIO: ... south dry spells of light to moderate rain with the outlook of temperatures from 55 to 61 degrees Fahrenheit. Further north, cumulative winds, light snow expected with increasing clouds... FRANK BRYCE: Bloody kids. -- LOCATION: Riddle House – exterior – night BIRD: (caw, caw) -- LOCATION: Riddle House – interior entry - stairs - LOCATION: Riddle house – upstairs room LORD VOLDEMORT: How fastidious you’ve become, Wormtail. As I recall, you once called the newest scuttlebutt hope. Could it be that your boundless mercy is but unwillingness from you? WORMTAIL: Oh, no, no, no, my Lord Voldemort. I only meant... perhaps if we were to do it without the boyVOLDEMORT: No! The boy is everything. It cannot be done without him, and it will be done exactly as I say. BARTY CROUCH JUNIOR: I will not disappoint you, my Lord. VOLDEMORT: Good! First, gather our old comrades. Send them a- a sign. NAGINI: Hay-sha-gasa-asay. Sa—say ah a-say. VOLDEMORT: Nagini tells me the old Muggle caretaker is standing just outside the door! VOLDEMORT: Step aside, Wormtail, so I can give our guest a proper greeting. Avada Kedavra! -- Scene 2: The Portkey. -- LOCATION: The Burrow – Ron’s room HERMIONE: Harry. Harry! Are you alright? HARRY: Hermione. Bad dream. When did you get here? HERMIONE: Just now. You? HARRY: Last night. HERMIONE: Wake up. Wake up, Ronald! RON: Bloody hell. HERMIONE: Honestly, get dressed. And don't go back to sleep. Come on, Ron! Your mother says breakfast's ready. -- LOCATION: The Burrow – exterior -- LOCATION: Grassy woodlands HARRY: Ron, where are we actually going? RON: Don't know. Hey, Dad! Where are we going? ARTHUR WEASLEY: Haven't the foggiest. Keep up! AMOS DIGGORY: Arthur! It's about time, son. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Sorry, Amos. Some of us had a bit of a sleepy start. RON: (yawn) ARTHUR WEASLEY: This is Amos Diggory, everyone. He works with me, at the Ministry. And this strapping young lad must be Cedric, am I right? CEDRIC: Yes, sir. This way. AMOS DIGGORY: Merlin's beard, you must be Harry Potter. HARRY: Yes, sir. AMOS DIGGORY: Great, great pleasure. HARRY: Pleasure to meet you too, sir. AMOS DIGGORY: Uh-hum... AMOS DIGGORY: That's it, sir, just over there. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Shall we? AMOS DIGGORY: Oh, yeah. ARTHUR WEASLEY: We don't want to be late. AMOS DIGGORY: Come on. Get in there. Get yourself into a good position. HARRY: Why are they all standing around that manky old boot? FRED: That isn't just any old manky boot, mate. GEORGE: It's a Portkey. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Time to go. HARRY: What's a 'Portkey'? ARTHUR WEASLEY: Ready? AMOS DIGGORY: After three. One... Two... ARTHUR WEASLEY: Harry! AMOS DIGGORY: Three! ALL: Ahh! AMOS DIGGORY: Ah-ha! ARTHUR WEASLEY: Let go kids! HERMIONE: What? ARTHUR WEASLEY: Let go! ALL: Ahh! HARRY: Ooof! HERMIONE: Ah! Ron: Ugh! FRED, GEORGE: Ah-ha! -- LOCATION: Grassy field FRED:: I bet that cleared your sinuses, eh? Hah! GEORGE: Total shambles, as per usual. HARRY: Thanks. -- Scene 3: The Quidditch World Cup. -- LOCATION: Quidditch World Cup - campground FRED: Come on, look at that! ARTHUR WEASLEY: Well kids, welcome to the Quidditch World Cup! ARTHUR WEASLEY: Keep up, girls! GINNY: Look! ARTHUR WEASLEY: Keep up! RON: Blimey! AMOS DIGGORY: Parting of the ways I think, old chap. See you at the match. ARTHUR WEASLEY: See you at the match! Cedric...Cedric! HARRY: See ya later, Cedric. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Ah! Home, sweet home. HARRY: What? -- LOCATION: Quidditch World Cup - campground – Weasley tent - interior ARTHUR WEASLEY: Ah, excellent, excellent. Girls, choose a bunk and unpack. Ron, get out of the kitchen. We're all hungry. FRED, GEORGE: Yeah, get out of the kitchen, Ron. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Feet off the table. FRED AND GEORGE: Feet off the table. HARRY: I love magic. -- LOCATION: Quidditch World Cup – stadium – exterior - night -- LOCATION: Quidditch World Cup - stadium - stands RON: Blimey, Dad, how far up are we? LUCIUS MALFOY: Well, put it this way. If it rains... you'll be the first to know. DRACO: Father and I are in the Minister's box, by personal invitation of Cornelius Fudge, himself. LUCIUS MALFOY: Don't boast, Draco. There's no need with these people. Do enjoy yourself, won't you, while you can. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Come on up, take your seats. I told you these seats would be worth waiting for. Ha! GEORGE: Come on! A-hah! FRED: It's the Irish! There’s Troy! GEORGE: And Mullet. FRED: And Moran! HERMIONE: Ha, ha! GEORGE: Here come the Bulgarians! HARRY: Oh, yes! HERMIONE: Who’s that? RON: Yeah! FRED: That’s just the best seeker in the world. OTHERS: Krum, Krum, Krum, Krum, Krum, Krum, Krum, Krum... WEASLEYS: Krum!!! GEORGE: Yes! HERMIONE: Whoo-hoo! CORNELIUS FUDGE: (Amplified) Good evening! As Minister for Magic, it gives me great pleasure to welcome each and every one of you to the final of the four hundred and twenty-second Quidditch World Cup. Let the match begin! -- Scene 4: The Dark Mark. -- LOCATION: Quidditch World Cup - campground – Weasley tent – interior - night ALL: To-doodle-doo-doodle-doo-doo-doodle-doo... RON: There's no one like Krum. GEORGE: Krum? FRED: Dumb-Krum. RON: He's like a bird, the way he rides the wind. He's more than an athlete. He's an artist. FRED, GEORGE: 'KRUMMMM'. GINNY: I think you're in love, Ron. FRED: Viktor, I love you! GEORGE: Viktor, I do! FRED, GEORGE, HARRY: When we're apart my heart beats only for youuu! FRED: Sounds like the Irish have got their pride on. Heh, heh. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Stop! Stop it. It's not the Irish. We've gotta get out of here. Now! -- LOCATION: Quidditch World Cup - campground – Weasley tent – exterior – night OTHER: Run! Get out! It’s the Death Eaters! ARTHUR WEASLEY: Get back to the Portkey, everybody, and stick together! Fred, George... Ginny is your responsibility. Go! HERMIONE: Harry! -- LOCAATION: Quidditch World Cup - campground – night HERMIONE: Harry! Harry! Harry! OTHERS: Ahh! Ohh! HARRY: Ah-ah-ah-ahh! Ugh! Oh-ugh! -- LOCATION: Quidditch World Cup - campground – night – later BARTY CROUCH JUNIOR: Morsmordre! RON: Harry! Where are you? HERMIONE: Harry! RON: We’ve been looking for you for ages. Thought we lost you, man. What is that? HARRY: Uh! OTHERS: Stupefy! HERMIONE: Ahh! ARTHUR WEASLEY: Stop! That's my son! Ron, Harry, Hermione are you alright? RON: We came back for Harry. MR. CROUCH: Which of you conjured it? ARTHUR WEASLEY: Crouch, you can't possibly... MR. CROUCH: Do not lie! You’ve been discovered at the scene of the crime! HARRY: Crime? ARTHUR WEASLEY: Barty, they're just kids! HARRY: What crime? HERMIONE: It's the Dark Mark, Harry. It’s his mark. HARRY: Voldemort? Those people tonight, in the masks... they're his, too, aren't they? His followers. ARTHUR WEASLEY: Yes. Death Eaters. MR. CROUCH: Follow me. HARRY: Um, there was a man...before. Uh, there. MR. CROUCH: All of you, this way. ARTHUR WEASLEY: A man, Harry. Who? HARRY: I dunno. I didn't see his face. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – exterior – dusk -- Scene 5: The Triwizard Tournament. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express - interior FOOD TROLLEY LADY: Anything from the trolley? Anything from the trolley? Anything from the trolley, dears? RON: Packet of Drooble’s and a... Licorice Wand. On second thought, just the Drooble’s. HARRY: It's alright, I'll get it. RON: Just the Drooble’s, thanks. CHO: Two pumpkin pasties, please... Thank you. FOOD TROLLEY LADY: Anything sweet for you, dear? HARRY: Oh, no. I’m not hungry, thank you. FOOD TROLLEY LADY: Anything from the trolley? HERMIONE: This is horrible. How can the Ministry not know who conjured it? Isn't there any security orRON: Loads, according to Dad. That's what worried them so much- it happened right under their noses. HERMIONE: It's hurting again, isn't it, your scar. HARRY: I'm fine. HERMIONE: You know Sirius will want to hear about this- what you saw at the World Cup, and the dream. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – interior - later HARRY: Hedwig, there we go. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entryway – exterior – Beauxbatons carriage STUDENTS: Oh! Wow! HAGRID: Clear the runway. Huh. Huh. Ho! Owww! FRED: Whoa! Well, there's something you don't see every day. GEORGE: Ha, ha, ha. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – Durmstrang ship - exterior -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall DUMBLEDORE: Well, now we're all settled in and sorted, I'd like to make an announcement. This castle will not only be your home this year, but home to some very special guests, as well. You see, Hogwarts has been chosen... (whispering) what is it? FILCH: (whispering) ...Beauxbatons... DUMBLEDORE: (whispering) They have to wait. DUMBLEDORE: So, Hogwarts has been chosen to host a legendary event: the Triwizard Tournament. Now, for those of you who do not know, the Triwizard Tournament brings together three schools for a series of magical contests. From each school, a single student is selected to compete. Now let me be clear: if chosen, you stand alone. And trust me when I say these contests are not for the faint hearted, but more of that later. For now, please join me in welcoming the lovely ladies of the Beauxbatons Academy of Magic and their Headmistress, Madame Maxime. BEAUXBATONS STUDENTS: Ahh...Ahhh... RON: Bloody hell... SEAMUS: Blimey, that's one big woman. HOGWARTS STUDENTS: Yeah! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo-oo! DUMBLEDORE: And now, our friends from the north. Please greet the proud sons of Durmstrang and their High Master, Igor Karkaroff. DURMSTRANG STUDENTS: Ho! Ha!... Ho! Ha! RON: Blimey, it's him. Viktor Krum! KARKAROFF: Albus! DUMBLEDORE: Igor. -- Scene 6: The Goblet of Fire. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – stormy night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – decorated for Start of Term Feast MADAME MAXIME: Professor Dumbly-dorr, my ’orses have traveled a long way. They will need attending to. DUMBLEDORE: Not to worry, Madame Maxime. Our gamekeeper, Hagrid, is more than capable of seeing to them. HAGRID: Ha, ha, hum... MADAME MAXIME: But you know, Monsieur ’Agrid... HAGRID: Um-hum? MADAME MAXIME: ...they drink only single-malt whiskey. HAGRID: Ha! PROFESSOR FLITWICK: Ahh! Ha! You idiot! HAGRID: Ooh. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - later DUMBLEDORE: Your attention, please! I would like to say a few words. Eternal glory. That is what awaits the student who wins the Triwizard Tournament. But to do this, that student must survive three tasks. Three extremely dangerous tasks. FRED AND GEORGE: Wicked. DUMBLEDORE: For this reason, the Ministry has seen fit to impose a new rule. To explain all this we have the head of the Department of International Magical Cooperation, Mr. Bartemius Crouch. STUDENTS: Ahh! Eeeh! RON: Bloody hell, it's Mad-Eye Moody. HERMIONE: Alastor Moody? The Auror? DEAN THOMAS: Auror? RON: Dark wizard catcher. Half the cells in Azkaban are full, thanks to him. He's supposed to be mad as a hatter, though, these days. DUMBLEDORE: Ah, my dear old friend, thanks for coming. MAD-EYE MOODY: Stupid ceiling. DUMBLEDORE: Ha, ha. SEAMUS: What's that he's drinkin’, do you suppose? HARRY: I dunno, but I don't think it's pumpkin juice. MR. CROUCH: After due consideration, the Ministry has concluded that, for their own safety, no student under the age of seventeen should be allowed to put forth their name for the Triwizard Tournament. This decision is final. FRED AND GEORGE: That's rubbish! GEORGE: That’s rubbish! You don't know what you're doing! OTHERS: Booo! DUMBLEDORE: Silence! HERMIONE: We’ll not talk about that, then. DUMBLEDORE: The Goblet of Fire. Anyone wishing to submit themselves for the Tournament, merely write their name upon a piece of parchment and throw it in the flame before this hour on Thursday night. Do not do so lightly; if chosen there's no turning back. As from this moment, the Triwizard Tournament has begun. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Durmstrang ship – exterior – night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Great Hall - night -- Scene 7: The Unforgivable Curses. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - DADA Classroom MAD-EYE MOODY: Alastor Moody. Ex-Auror. Ministry malcontent. And your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. I am here because Dumbledore asked me. End of story, goodbye, the end. Any questions? When it comes to the Dark Arts, I believe in a practical approach. But first, which of you can tell me how many Unforgivable Curses there are? HERMIONE: Three, sir. MAD-EYE MOODY: And they are so named? HERMIONE: Because they are unforgivable. Use any one of them will... MAD-EYE MOODY: Will earn you a one-way ticket to Azkaban. Correct. Now the Ministry says you're too young to see what these curses do. I say different! You need to know what you're up against! You need to be prepared! You need to find another place to put your chewing gum besides the underside of your desk, Mr. Finnigan! SEAMUS: Aw, no way! The old codger can see out the back of his head! MAD-EYE MOODY: I’m here to call the class rules! So, which curse shall we see first? Weasley! RON: Yes... MAD-EYE MOODY: Stand! Give us a curse. RON: Well, my- my dad did tell me about one... MAD-EYE MOODY: Huh? RON: The Imperious Curse. MAD-EYE MOODY: Oh yeah, your father would know all about that. Gave the Ministry quite a bit of grief a few years ago. Perhaps this will show you why. Hello. Lovely little beauty. Engorgio. Imperio! STUDENTS: Ha, ha, ha, ha! CRABBE: Ahh! Ah! MAD-EYE MOODY: Don't worry. It’s completely harmless. PAVARTI: Oh! MAD-EYE MOODY: But, if she bites... RON: Ah! Ahh! MAD-EYE MOODY: ...she's lethal! RON: Ah! STUDENTS: Ha, ha, ha! DRACO: Ha, Ha! Ha, ha, ha! MAD-EYE MOODY: What are you laughing at? DRACO: Ahh! Get it off me! HARRY: Aha, ha, ha! MAD-EYE MOODY: Ah-ha, ha, ha! Talented, isn't she? What shall I have her do next? Jump out the window? Drown herself? Scores of witches and wizards have claimed that they only did You-Know-Whose bidding under the influence of the Imperious Curse. But, here's the rub: how do we sort out the liars? Another... another... Ah, ha... come on. Longbottom, is it? Up. Professor Sprout tells me you have an aptitude for Herbology. NEVILLE: There- there's the um... The Cruciatus Curse. MAD-EYE MOODY: Correct! Correct! Come, come. Particularly nasty. The torture curse. Crucio! HERMIONE: Stop it! Can't you see it's bothering him? Stop it! MAD-EYE MOODY: Ah. Um, huh. Perhaps you could give us the last Unforgivable Curse, Miss Granger. MAD-EYE MOODY: No? Avada Kedavra! The killing curse. Only one person is known to have survived it. And he's sitting in this room. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – spiral staircase RON: Brilliant, isn't he! Completely demented, of course. Terrifying to be in the same room with. But he's really been there, you know. He’s looked evil in the eye. HERMIONE: There's a reason those curses are unforgivable, and to perform them in a classroom... I mean, did you see Neville's face? HERMIONE: Neville? MAD-EYE MOODY: Son, you alright? NEVILLE: (nods) MAD-EYE MOODY: Come on, we'll have a cup of tea. I want to show you something. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – raining -- Scene 8: The Four Champions. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall STUDENTS: (clapping) BOY: Come on, Cedric, put it in! STUDENTS: Yeah! (clapping) RON: Eternal glory. Be brilliant, wouldn't it? In three years from now, we'll be old enough to be chosen. HARRY: Yeah, well rather you than me. FRED AND GEORGE: Ha, ha! Yeah! Yes! STUDENTS: Whoo-hoo! Yeah! GEORGE: Thank you, thank you. Ha! Well lads, we've done it. FRED: Cooked it up just this morning. HERMIONE: It's not going to work. FRED: Oh, yeah? GEORGE: And why's that, Granger? HERMIONE: You see this? This is an age line. Dumbledore drew it himself. FRED: So? HERMIONE: So, a genius like Dumbledore couldn't possibly be fooled by a dodge as pathetically dimwitted as an aging potion. FRED: Ah, but that's why it's so brilliant. GEORGE: Because it’s so pathetically dimwitted. FRED: Ah-hah! GEORGE: Ready, Fred? FRED: Ready, George? FRED AND GEORGE: Bottoms up! STUDENTS: Yeah! Whoo! FRED AND GEORGE: Yes! FRED: Ah, ha, ha, ha! Yes! FRED AND GEORGE: Ready? Yes! Ahhh! Umph! STUDENTS: Oooh! GEORGE: You said... FRED: You said... GEORGE: Alright, you want a piece of it? STUDENTS: Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior - night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – night DUMBLEDORE: Sit down, please. And now the moment you've all been waiting for: the champion selection! DUMBLEDORE: The Durmstrang champion is... Viktor Krum! DUMBLEDORE: The champion from Beauxbatons... is Fleur Delacour. DUMBLEDORE: The Hogwarts champion... Cedric Diggory. DUMBLEDORE: Excellent! We now have our three champions! But in the end, only one will go down in history. Only one will hoist this chalice of champions, this vessel of victory, the Triwizard Cup! DUMBLEDORE: Harry Potter... Harry Potter? HAGRID: No... No! DUMBLEDORE: Harry Potter! HERMIONE: Go on, Harry. Harry, for goodness sake! STUDENT: He's a cheat! DEAN THOMAS: He's not even seventeen yet. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Trophy Room – night MADAME MAXIME: Dumbledore, wait! KARKAROFF: Everything is a conspiracy theory with you... MADAME MAXIME: I beg you pardon, Monsieur... DUMBLEDORE: Quiet – I can’t think! KARKAROFF: That’s just a conspiracy theory. MADAME MAXIME: I protest! I protest! DUMBLEDORE: Harry! Did you put your name in that Goblet of Fire? HARRY: No, sir. DUMBLEDORE: Did you ask one of the older students to do it for you? HARRY: No, sir. DUMBLEDORE: You're absolutely sure? HARRY: Yes, sir. Yes, sir! MADAME MAXIME: But of course, he is lying. MAD-EYE MOODY: The hell he is. The Goblet of Fire is an exceptionally powerful magical object. Only an exceptionally powerful Confundus charm could have hoodwinked it - magic way beyond the talents of a Fourth Year! KARKAROFF: You seem to have given this a fair bit of thought, Mad-Eye. MAD-EYE MOODY: It was once my job to think as Dark wizards do, Karkaroff. Perhaps you remember? DUMBLEDORE: That doesn't help, Alastor. I leave this to you, Barty. MR. CROUCH: The rules are absolute. The Goblet of Fire constitutes a binding magical contract. Mr. Potter has no choice. He is, as of tonight, a Triwizard champion. -- Scene 9: Let Events Unfold. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – night – raining -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dumbledore’s office - night PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: This can't go on, Albus. First the Dark Mark, now this? DUMBLEDORE: What do you suggest, Minerva? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Put an end to it. Don't let Potter compete! DUMBLEDORE: You heard Barty. The rules are clear. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Well, the devil with Barty and his rules. And since when did you accommodate the Ministry? SNAPE: Master, I, too, find it difficult to believe this mere coincidence. However, if we are to truly discover the meaning of these events, perhaps we should, for the time being, let them unfold. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: What? Do nothing? Offer him up as bait? Potter is a boy, not a piece of meat. DUMBLEDORE: I agree... with Severus. Alastor, keep an eye on Harry, will you? MAD-EYE MOODY: I can do that. DUMBLEDORE: Don't let him know, though. He must be anxious enough, as it is... knowing what lies ahead. Then again, we all are. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory - night RON: How did you do it? Huh, never mind. It doesn't matter. You might have let your best friend know, though. HARRY: Let you know what? RON: You know bloody well what. HARRY: I didn't ask for this to happen, Ron. Okay? You're being stupid. RON: Yeah, that's me. Ron Weasley, Harry Potter's stupid friend. HARRY: I didn't put my name in that cup. I don't want eternal glory. I just wanna be... Look, I don't know what happened tonight, and I don't know why. It just did, OK? RON: Piss off. -- Scene 10: Rita Skeeter. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Trophy Room - daytime (flash) RITA SKEETER: What a charismatic quartet. Hello! I'm Rita Skeeter. I write for the Daily Prophet. But of course, you know that, don't you? It's you we don't know. You're the juicy news. What quirks lurk beneath those rosy cheeks? What mysteries do the muscles mask? Does courage lie beneath those curls? In short, what makes a champion tick? Me, myself and I want to know, not to mention my rabid readers. So, who's feeling up to sharing? Mmm? Shall we start with the youngest? Lovely. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Broom cupboard RITA SKEETER: Mmm. This is cozy. HARRY: Uh, it's a broom cupboard. RITA SKEETER: You should feel right at home, then. Don't mind if I use a Quick Quotes Quill, do you? HARRY: Oh- um, no. RITA SKEETER: So tell me Harry, here you sit, a mere boy of twelve... HARRY: I'm fourteen. RITA SKEETER: ...about to compete against three students, not only vastly more emotionally mature than yourself, but who have mastered spells that you wouldn't attempt in your dizziest daydreams. Concerned? HARRY: Um, I- I dunno. I haven't really...thought about it. RITA SKEETER: Just ignore the Quill. But then of course, you're no ordinary boy of twelve, are you? HARRY: Fourteen. RITA SKEETER: The story's legend. Do you think it was the trauma of your past that made you so keen to enter such a dangerous tournament? HARRY: Ah, no, I- I didn't enter. RITA SKEETER: Ah- Course you didn't. Everyone loves a rebel, Harry. Ah, ha. Scratch that last. Speaking of your parents, were they alive, how do you think they'd feel? Proud? Or concerned that your attitude shows, at best, a pathological need for attention; at worst, a psychotic death wish? HARRY: Hey, my ‘eyes aren't glistening with the ghosts of my past’! -- Scene 11: Sirius Conversation. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Owlery - exterior – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Owlery - daytime SIRIUS (LETTER): Harry, I couldn't risk sending Hedwig. Ever since the World Cup the Ministry's been intercepting more and more owls, and she's too easily recognized. We need to talk, Harry, face to face. Meet me in the Gryffindor common room at one o’clock this Saturday night, and make sure you're alone. Sirius. P.S.... HARRY: Agh! SIRIUS (LETTER): The bird bites. HARRY: Ah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room - night HARRY: Sirius? RITA SKEETER (ARTICLE): ‘Harry Potter, aged twelve, suspect entrant in the Triwizard Tournament, his eyes swimming with the ghosts of his past, is choking back tears’...ah-hahh! SIRIUS (IN FIRE): Psst...psst. Ahh... HARRY: Sirius?! How... SIRIUS (IN FIRE): I don't have much time, Harry, so let me get straight to it. Did you, or did you not, put your name into the Goblet of Fire? HARRY: No! SIRIUS (IN FIRE): Shh... I had to ask. Now, tell me about this dream of yours. You mentioned Wormtail and Voldemort, but who was the third man in the room? HARRY: I dunno. SIRIUS (IN FIRE): You didn't hear a name? HARRY: No. Umm... Voldemort was giving him a job to do, something important. SIRIUS (IN FIRE): And what was that? HARRY: He wanted... me. I dunno why, but he was gonna use this man to get to me. Well, I- I mean, it was only a dream, right? SIRIUS (IN FIRE): Yes. It's just a dream. Look, Harry, the Death Eaters at the World Cup, your name rising from that Goblet, these are not just coincidences. Hogwarts isn't safe any more. HARRY: What are you saying? SIRIUS (IN FIRE): I'm saying the devils are inside the walls. Igor Karkaroff, he was a Death Eater. And no one, no one stops being a Death Eater. Then there's Barty Crouch- heart of stone- sent his own son to Azkaban. HARRY: Do you think one of them put my name in the Goblet? SIRIUS (IN FIRE): I haven't a clue who put your name in that Goblet, Harry, but whoever did is no friend to you. People die in this tournament. HARRY: I'm not ready for this, Sirius. SIRIUS (IN FIRE): You don't have a choice. HARRY: Someone's coming! SIRIUS (IN FIRE): Keep your friends close, Harry! RON: Who were you talking to? HARRY: What? Who says I was talking to anyone? RON: I heard voices. HARRY: Maybe you're imagining things; wouldn't be the first time. RON: You're probably just practicing for your next interview, I expect. -- Scene 12: The Hungarian Horntail. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – shoreline - daytime NEVILLE: Amazing. Amazing. HARRY: Neville! You're doing it again! NEVILLE: Oh, right. Sorry. HARRY: Magical Water Plants of the Highland Lochs? NEVILLE: Yeah- Moody gave it to me, that- that day we had tea. HERMIONE: Look, we've already been through enough people. Why don't you just go and talk to him yourself? Ughh. Ron, I just don’t know why. What do you want me to say, again? HERMIONE: Ronald would like me to tell you, that Seamus told him, that Dean was told by Parvati, that Hagrid’s looking for you. HARRY: Is that right? Well.... what? HERMIONE: Uhhh...(whispering) RON: (whispering) HERMIONE: Dean was told by Parvati that... Please don't ask me say it again. Hagrid's looking for you. HARRY: Well, you can tell Ronald... HERMIONE: I'm not an owl! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dark Forest - night HAGRID: Did you bring your father's cloak like I asked you? HARRY: Yeah, I brought the cloak. Hagrid, where are we going? HAGRID: You'll see soon enough. Now pay attention, this is important. HARRY: What's with the flower? Hagrid, have you combed your hair? HAGRID: As a matter of fact, I have. You might like to try the same thing now and again. (roar) MADAME MAXIME: Hagrid? HAGRID: Oh, the cloak. Put the cloak on. HAGRID: Bonsoir, Olympe. MADAME MAXIME: Oh, Hagrid. I thought perhaps you weren't coming. I thought perhaps... you had... forgotten me. HAGRID: Huh! I couldn't forget you, Olympe. MADAME MAXIME: What is it you wanted to show me? When we spoke earlier, you sounded so... exhilarated. HAGRID: You'll be glad you came, trust me. MADAME MAXIME: Ahh, c'est magnifique! Can we get closer? HARRY: Dragons? That's the first task? You're joking. HAGRID: Come on, Harry. They're just seriously misunderstood creatures. (roar) HAGRID: Ah! Although, I have to admit that Horntail is a right nasty piece of work. Poor Ron nearly fainted just seeing him, you know. HARRY: Ron was here? HAGRID: Oh, sure. His brother Charlie helped to bring them over from Romania. Didn't Ron tell you that? HARRY: No, he didn't. He didn't tell me a thing. (roar) -- Scene 13: Transforming Malfoy. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - daytime BOY: Ya stink, Potter. STUDENT: Ah, you stink, Potter! STUDENTS: Ha, ha, ha! STUDENT: Potter! Potter stinks! BOY: Cedric rules! HARRY: Thanks. ERNIE MACMILLAN: Like your badge? HANNAH ABBOTT: Ha, ha, ha! HARRY: Excuse me... HANNAH ABBOTT: Ha, ha, ha... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – courtyard - daytime STUDENT: Hey! Read the badge, Potter. HARRY: Can I have a word? CEDRIC: Alright. STUDENT: You stink, Potter. STUDENTS: Ha, ha, ha, ha! HARRY: Dragons. That's the first task. They've got one for each of us. STUDENT: Come on, Cedge. CEDRIC: Do y- are you serious? And um, Fleur and Krum, do they...? HARRY: Yes. STUDENT: Come on, Cedge, leave him. He’s not worth it. Read the badges, Potter! CEDRIC: Right... Hey listen, about the badges. I've asked them not to wear them. HARRY: Don't worry about it. SEAMUS: It’s not like they try to blow things up exactly. This happens a fair bit. You have to admit, though, Fleur is pretty fascinating. HARRY: You're a right foul git, you know that? RON: You think so? HARRY: I know so. RON: Anything else? HARRY: Yeah. Stay away from me. RON: Fine. STUDENT: There’s Potter. OTHER: Heh, heh, heh. DRACO: Why so tense, Potter? My father and I have a bet, you see. I don't think you're gonna last ten minutes in this tournament... He disagrees. He thinks you won't last five. Ha, ha! HARRY: I don't give a damn what your father thinks, Malfoy. DRACO: Ugh! HARRY: He's vile and cruel, and you're a pathetic. DRACO: Pathetic? I’ll teach you... MAD-EYE MOODY: Hold it there, sonny... DRACO: Whaa! MAD-EY MOODY: I'll teach you to curse someone when their back is turned. You stinkin’, cowardly, scummy, backstabbing... PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Professor Moody, what- what are you doing? MAD-EYE MOODY: Teaching. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Is that a- Is that a student? MAD-EYE MOODY: Technically, it's a ferret. CRABBE: Ahh! Oh! Aha! Ah! GOYLE: Stand still...stand still! Argh! STUDENTS: Ha, ha, ha, ha! HARRY: Ha, ha! DRACO: Ah! Whoa! Well, my father will hear about this! MAD-EYE MOODY: Is that a threat? Huh? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Professor Moody... MAD-EYE MOODY: Is that a threat? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Professor... MAD-EYE MOODY: I could tell you stories about your father that would curl even your greasy hair, boy! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Alastor! MAD-EYE MOODY: It doesn't end here! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Alastor! We never use transfiguration as a punishment! Surely, Dumbledore told you that? MAD-EYE MOODY: He might've mentioned it. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Well, you will do well to remember it. Away! MAD-EYE MOODY: You. Come with me. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Moody’s office MAD-EYE MOODY: Oh, ahh. Ahhh. That's a Foe-Glass. Lets me keep an eye on my enemies. If I can see the whites of their eyes, they're standing right behind me. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! (Bump...Arhh!) MAD-EYE MOODY: Wouldn't even bother telling you what's in there. You wouldn't believe it, if I did. Now... what are you going to do about your dragon? HARRY: Oh... um... Well, you know, I just thought I'd...uh... MAD-EYE MOODY: Sit. Listen to me, Potter. Your pal Diggory, by your age he could turn a whistle into a watch and have it sing you the time. Miss Delacour, she's as much a fairy princess as I am. As for Krum, his head may be filled with sawdust, but Karkaroff's is not. They'll have a strategy, and you can bet that it will play to Krum's strengths. Hmm? Come on, Potter. What are your strengths? HARRY: Um... I dunno... Well, I can fly. I mean, I'm a fair flyer. But I... MAD-EYE MOODY: Better than fair, the way I heard it. HARRY: But, I'm not allowed a broom. MAD-EYE MOODY: You're allowed a wand. -- Scene 14: The First Task. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dragon arena – exterior – daytime FRED: Bets, place your bets... GEORGE: Bets taken. Bets taken here... FRED: Step up, mates! Take a chance on today’s bloodbath! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dragon arena - stands FRED: He’s small, but he’s on the bound to survive on today’s index. Yes, sir...ten for Fleur, there you go. Thank you very much. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dragon arena - Champions’ tent – interior DUMBLEDORE (Amplified): Your attention, please. This is a great day for all of us. DRAGON: (Roar) DUMBLEDORE (Amplified): Each of the three tasks involves very considerable danger. Please keep your seats at all times... HERMIONE: Pssst! Pssst! Harry? Is that you? HARRY: Yeah. HERMIONE: How are you feeling? OK? ...The key is to concentrate. After that, you just have to... HARRY: Battle a dragon. RITA SKEETER: (Flash) Young love! Ohh, how... Mmm... stirring. Hmm... If everything goes unfortunately today, you two may even make the front page. KRUM: You have no business here. This tent is for champions and friends. RITA SKEETER: No matter. We've a... got what we wanted. (flash) DUMBLEDORE: Good day, champions. Gather round, please. Now, you've waited. You've wondered. And at last, the moment has arrived. The moment only four of you can fully appreciate. DUMBLEDORE: What are you doing here, Miss Granger? HERMIONE: Oh, um.. Sorry, I'll just... go. DUMBLEDORE: Barty, the bag. MR. CROUCH: Champions, in a circle around me. Miss Delacour, over here. Mr. Krum, and a, Potter, Mr. Potter, over here. That’s right. Now. Miss Delacour, if you will... MR. CROUCH: The Welsh Green. Mr. Krum... MR. CROUCH: The Chinese Fireball. Oooooh. MR. CROUCH: The Swedish Short-Snout. Which leaves... HARRY: The Horntail... MR. CROUCH: What's that boy? HARRY: Nothing. MR. CROUCH: The Hungarian Horntail. These represent four very real dragons, each of which has been given a golden egg to protect. Your objective is simple: collect the egg. This you must do, for each egg contains a clue without which you cannot hope to proceed to the next task. Any questions? DUMBLEDORE: Very well. Good luck champions. Mr. Diggory, at the sound of the cannon you need to... (Boom) CROWD: (Cheers) Diggory! Diggory! Diggory! Diggory! Diggory! Diggory! Diggory! Diggory! Diggory! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Champions’ tent – interior - later DUMBLEDORE (Amplified): Three of our champions have now faced their dragons, and so each one of them will proceed to the next task. And now, our fourth and final contestant... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dragon arena – stands CROWD: (Cheers) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dragon arena - interior CROWD: Oh! Ahhh! Whoa! DRAGON: (Roar) CROWD: Oh! Aeee! Ahh! HARRY: Ah! KARKAROFF: Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh! HERMIONE: Your wand, Harry! Your wand! HARRY: Accio Firebolt! CROWD: Yeah! HERMIONE: Yes! RON: Yeah! Go! DRACO: Ooh! RON: Oh, my! HARRY: Whoa! FRED AND GEORGE: Yeah! FRED: Well done. Dragon! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dragon arena – stands HERMIONE: Yeah! Yes! CROWD: (cheers) -- Scene 15: Best Foot Forward. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room STUDENTS: (Cheering) HERMIONE: Whoo-hoo! STUDENT: Well done, Harry! Whoo-hoo! FRED: Yes, Harry! GEORGE: We knew you wouldn't die, Harry. FRED: Lose a leg... GEORGE: ...or an arm... FRED: ...pack it in altogether... FRED AND GEORGE: Never! Ha, haa! SEAMUS: Show us! Go on, Harry, what's the clue? HARRY: Who wants me to open it? STUDENTS: Yes! HARRY: Do you want me to open it? STUDENTS: Yes! RON: What the bloody hell was that? FRED: Alright everyone, go back to your knitting. Uh, this is gonna be uncomfortable enough without all you nosey sods listening in. RON: I reckon you'd have to be barking mad to put your own name in the Goblet of Fire. HARRY: Caught on, have you? Took you long enough. RON: I wasn't the only one who thought you'd done it. Everyone was saying it behind your back. HARRY: Brilliant. That makes me feel loads better. RON: At least I warned you about the dragons. HARRY: Hagrid warned me about the dragons. RON: No- no, no, I did. No, don't you remember? I told Hermione to tell you that Seamus told me that Parvati told Dean that Hagrid was looking for you. Seamus never actually told me anything, so it was- it was really me all along. I thought we'd be alright, you know, after you figured that out. HARRY: Who- who could possibly figure that out? That's completely mental. RON: Heh, heh, yeah, it is, isn't it? Suppose I was a bit distraught. HERMIONE: Boys! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – morning -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – morning PADMA AND PAVARTI: Hi, Harry! CHO: (whispering) Heh, he, he. Shh! HERMIONE: Look at this! I can't believe it! She's done it again. ‘Miss Granger, a plain but ambitious girl, seems to be developing a taste for famous wizards. Her latest prey, sources report, is none other than the Bulgarian bon-bon Viktor Krum. No word yet on how Harry Potter's taking this latest emotional blow’. NIGEL: Parcel for you, Mr. Weasley. RON: Ah, thank you, Nigel. HERMIONE: Ahem. RON: Not now, Nigel. Later. Go on. RON: I- I told him I'd get him Harry's autograph. HERMIONE: (sigh) RON: Oh look, Mum's sent me something... Mum sent me a dress? HARRY: Well, it does match your eyes. Is there a bonnet? Ah-hah! RON: Put those down, Harry. Ginny, these must be for you. GINNY: I'm not wearing that-- it's ghastly. HERMIONE: Ha, ha, ha. RON: What are you on about? HERMIONE: They're not for Ginny. They're for you— FRED AND GEORGE: Aha, ha. Ha, ha! HERMIONE: -dress robes. RON: Dress robes? For what? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – assembly hall PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: The Yule Ball has been a tradition of the... Triwizard Tournament since its inception. On Christmas eve night, we and our guests gather in the Great Hall for a night of well-mannered frivolity. As representatives of the host school, I expect each and every one of you to put your best foot forward, and I mean this literally, because the Yule Ball is first and foremost... a dance. GIRLS: Ooh! BOYS: Aw...(mumble) PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Silence. The house of Godric Gryffindor has commanded the respect of the wizard world for nearly ten centuries. I will not have you, in the course of a single evening, besmirching that name by behaving like a babbling, bumbling band of baboons. FRED: Try saying that five times faster. GEORGE: Babbling, bumbling band of baboons... FRED: Babbling, bumbling band of baboons... GEORGE: Babbling, bumbling band of baboons. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Now, to dance is to let the body breathe. Inside every girl a secret swan slumbers, longing to burst forth and take flight. RON: Something's about to burst out of Hilary’s middle, but I don't think it's a swan. SEAMUS: Heh, heh. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Inside every boy, a lordly lion prepared to prance. Mr. Weasley... RON: Yes? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Will you join me, please? RON: Hmm. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Now, place your right hand on my waist. RON: Where? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: My waist. BOY: (whistles) PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Now bend your arm. FRED AND GEORGE: Heh, heh. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Mr. Filch, if you please... One, two, three; one, two, three; one, two, three... FRED AND GEORGE: (humming) HARRY: Oi! Never gonna let him forget this, are you? FRED AND GEORGE: Never. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Everybody come together. Boys, on your feet. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory – night NEVILLE: (humming) -- Scene 16: An Unexpected Challenge. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – courtyard - daytime HARRY: Why do they have to travel in... packs? And how are you supposed to get one on their own to ask them? RON: Blimey, Harry, you’ve slayed dragons. If you can't get a date, who can? HARRY: I think I'd take the dragon right now. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – hallway - night HAGRID: I take after my mum. Though I didn't know her very well. She left when I was about three. MADAME MAXIME: Oh? HAGRID: No, not the maternal sort, her; broke my dad's heart, though. Do you know he was a tiny little feller, my dad? I could pick him up at the age of six with one hand and put him up on the dresser. HAGRID AND MADMAE MAXIME: Ha, ha, ha, ha! HAGRID: You laughed so hard at that... And then he died, just when I started school. An’ so I sort o’ had to make me own way, as it were. But enough of me, what about you? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – shoreline – daytime HERMIONE: Ahem. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Study hall - daytime RON: This is mad. At this rate we'll be the only ones in our year without dates. Ow! RON: Well, us and Neville! Heh! HARRY: Yeah, but then again, he can take himself. RON: Heh, heh, heh. HERMIONE: It might interest you to know that Neville's already got someone. RON: Aw... Now I'm really depressed. RON (READING NOTE FROM FRED): ‘Get a move on or all the good ones will have gone’ RON: Who are you goin’ with, then? FRED: Oi! Angelina. Do you want to go to the ball with me? ANGELINA JOHNSON: To the ball? Sure! RON: Well, Hermione, you're a girl. HERMIONE: Oh, well spotted. RON: Come with one of us? Ow! HARRY: Oh! RON: Come on. It's one thing for a bloke to show up alone. For a girl it's just sad. HERMIONE: I won't be going alone because, believe it or not, someone's asked me. HERMIONE: And I said ‘yes.’ RON: Bloody hell. She’s lying, right? HARRY: If you say so. RON: Look. We've just got to grit our teeth and do it. Tonight when we get back to the common room, we'll both have partners. Agreed? HARRY: Agreed. HARRY AND RON: Ow! Oh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Owlery - exterior – winter snow -- LOCAITION: Hogwarts – Owlery - stairs CHO: Oh! HARRY: Cho! CHO: Harry! Hee, hee. HARRY: Ha, ha. CHO: Watch yourself on the stairs; it's a bit icy at the top. HARRY: OK, thanks. Cho? CHO: Yes? HARRY: Um... Wa- I just wondered if- I just wondered if maybe you wanted to go to the ball with me? CHO: Sorry? I didn't catch that. HARRY: Um. I was just wondering if maybe you wanted to go to the ball with me. CHO: Oh, um... Harry, ah, I'm sorry, but someone's already asked me. And, ah, well, I- I- I've said I'll go... with him. HARRY: OK. Yeah. Great. Fine. No problem. OK. Good. CHO: Harry, I really am... sorry. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room HARRY: (sigh) GINNY: It’s alright. It’s OK, Ron. It’s alright, it doesn’t matter. HARRY: What happened to you? GINNY: He just asked Fleur Delacour out. HERMIONE: What? HARRY: What did she say? HERMIONE: No, of course. HERMIONE: She said yes? HARRY: Don't be silly. RON: There she was, walking by- you know I like it when they walk- I couldn't help it. It just sort of slipped out. GINNY: Actually, he sort of screamed at her. It was a bit frightening. HARRY: What did you do then? RON: What else? I ran for it. I'm not cut out for this, Harry. I don't know what got into me. PADMA AND PAVARTI: Hi, Harry. RON: I’ve always liked looking at them from behind... HARRY: Hey! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Durmstrang ship – exterior – night -- Scene 17: The Yule Ball. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entrance Hall - night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory - night RON: Bloody hell. Bloody hell! Bloody... RON: What are those? What are those? HARRY: My dress robes. RON: Well, they're alright. No lace, no dodgy little collar. HARRY: Well, I expect yours are more traditional. RON: Traditional? They're ancient! I look like my great aunt Tessie! I smell like my great aunt Tessie... Murder me, Harry. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Entrance Hall - night HARRY: Leave it alone. RON: Poor kid, bet she's alone in her room, crying her eyes out. HARRY: Who? RON: Hermione, of course. Come on Harry, why'd you think she wouldn't tell us who she's coming with? HARRY: Because we'd take the mickey out of her if she did. RON: Nobody asked her. I would have taken her meself, if she wasn't so bleeding proud. PADMA AND PARVATI: Hello boys. PADMA: Don't you look... dashing. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Oh, here you are, Potter. Are you and Miss Patil ready? HARRY: Ready, Professor? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: To dance! It's traditional that the three champions, well in this case four, are the first to dance. Surely I told you that? HARRY: No. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Oh, ah- well, now you know. Oh, as for you, Mr. Weasley, you- you may proceed into the Great Hall with Miss Patil. Oh, there you are... RON: Come on, then. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Come along this way! RON: Aw, come on! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Now, I need you all to line up in the procession, please. Oh! PARVATI: She looks beautiful! HARRY: Yeah, she does. HERMIONE: Hee-uh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – decorated for Yule Ball - night PADMA: Is that... Hermione Granger? With Viktor Krum? RON: Naw. A- absolutely not. PARVATI: Hi! ...Harry, take my waist. HARRY: What? PARVATI: Now. MAD-EYE MOODY: (humming) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – decorated for Yule Ball – night - later SINGER: Are you ready? With a body like a hairy troll. A- learnin’ to rock and roll. I spin around like a crazy elf, a-dancin’ by himself. I boogie down like a unicorn. A- no stoppin’ till the break of dawn. Aw, put you hands up in the air. Like an ogre, just don’t care. Oh, can you dance like a hippogriff? My-my-my, My-my-my, My-my-my... RON: He’s a ruddy pumpkin-head, isn’t he? SINGER: Flying off from a cliff. My-my-my, My-my-my, My-my-my... HARRY: I don’t think it was the books that had him going to the library. SINGER: Swoopin’ down to the ground. My-my-my, My-my-my, My-my-my... BOY: May I have your arm? PARVATI: Arm, leg- I’m yours! SINGER: Wheel around and around and around and around. My-my-my, Mymy-my, My-my-my...Aow! SINGER: I got to get to grips, ah; I don’t want to feel like this, ah; Your voice keeps haunting me; I cannot eat or sleep... HERMIONE: Hot isn't it? Viktor's gone to go and get drinks. Would you care to join us? RON: No, we'd not care to join you and Viktor. HERMIONE: What's got your wand in a knot? RON: He's a Durmstrang. You're fraternizing with the enemy. HERMIONE: The enemy? Who was it wanting his autograph? Besides, the whole point of the Tournament is ‘international magical cooperation’...to make friends. RON: Hrmph. I think he's got a bit more than friendship on his mind. SINGER: ...Sailed across the ocean blue, from the highest mountain, just to call your name. The moon throws down its light, and cuts me to the quick tonight. Change is in the air. Nothing will never be the same. PADMA: Are you going to ask me to dance, or not? RON: No. SINGER: You still look good to me, ooh, but your no good for me. PADMA: Huh... SINGER: I close my eyes, and I squeeze you from my consciousness... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall – decorated for Yule Ball – night - later RON: He's using you. HERMIONE: How dare you! Besides, I can take care of myself. RON: I doubt it. He's way too old. SINGER: It’s hard... HERMIONE: What? What? That's what you think? SINGER: You must be brave... RON: Yeah, that is what I think. HERMIONE: Well, you know the solution, then, don't you? RON: Go on. SINGER: Don’t let this moment slip away... HERMIONE: Next time there's a ball, pluck up the courage and ask me before somebody else does, and not as a last resort! RON: Well, t- t- that's just a- that’s just completely off the point. Harry... SINGER: Believe that magic works... HERMIONE: Where have you been? Never mind! Off to bed, both of you. RON: They get scary when they get older. SINGER: Don’t be afraid... HERMIONE: Ron, you spoiled everything! SINGER: Of being hurt... HARRY: What’s this about? SINGER: No, don’t let this magic die. Oh, the answer’s there... -- Scene 18: The Egg’s Clue. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory – night -- LOCATION: Riddle House - graveyard – winter snow – night -- LOCATION: Riddle House – upstairs room - night VOLDERMORT: Let me see it again. VOLDEMORT: Ah, ah yes, the time is close now. Harry! At last! Step aside, Wormtail, so I can give our guest a proper greeting! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boy’s dormitory – night HARRY: Ah! NEVILLE: You alright, Harry? I- I just got in. M- me! Heh, heh... (humming) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – Wooden bridge - daytime HERMIONE: Harry, you told me you'd figured the egg out weeks ago. The task is two days from now. HARRY: Really? I had no idea. I suppose Viktor's already figured it out. HERMIONE: I wouldn't know. We don't actually talk about the Tournament. Actually, we don't really talk at all. Viktor's more of a physical being. Ah- I just mean, he's not particularly loquacious. HARRY: Uh-hum. HERMIONE: Mostly, he watches me study. It's a bit annoying, actually. You are trying to figure this egg out, aren't you? HARRY: What's that supposed to mean? HERMIONE: It just means these tasks are designed to test you, in the most brutal way; they're almost cruel. And um... I'm scared for you. You got by the dragons mostly on nerve. I'm not sure it's going to be enough this time. CEDRIC: Hey, Potter... Potter! HARRY: Cedric. CEDRIC: How- how are you? HARRY: Spectacular. CEDRIC: Look, I realize I never really thanked you properly for tipping me off about those dragons. HARRY: Forget about it. I'm sure you would have done the same for me. CEDRIC: Exactly! You know the prefects’ bathroom on the fifth floor? CEDRIC: It's not a bad place for a bath. Just take your egg and... mull things over in the hot water. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Prefects’ bathroom - night HARRY: I must be out of my mind. HARRY: I’m definitely out of my mind. MOANING MYRTLE: He-ha! I'd try putting it in the water, if I were you. HARRY: Myrtle! MOANING MYRTLE: Hi! Hi-ya, Harry. Aye. Long time, no see. Ah-ha-ah-oohwooo!

MOANING MYRTLE: I was circling a blocked drain the other day, and could swear I saw a bit of Polyjuice potion. Not being a bad boy again are you, Harry? HARRY: Polyjuice potion? Kicked the habit. Myrtle, did you say ‘try putting it in the water’? MOANING MYRTLE: Wee-ooo-eee...ha-ah. Ohh, that's what he did. The other boy. Mmmm, the handsome one, Cedric. Well, go on. Open it. MERPERSON: (singing) Come seek us where our voices sound. We cannot sing above the ground. An hour long you'll have to look, to recover what we took. HARRY: Ah- huh- huh... MOANING MYRTLE: A-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! HARRY: Myrtle, there aren't Merpeople in the Black Lake, are there? MOANING MYRTLE: Ahhh, very good. It took Cedric ages to riddle it out. Almost all the bubbles were gone... Rrrah! Ha! He, he, he, he, he...Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha...Oh! Oh-oh! HARRY: Uhh... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Library - night HERMIONE: Harry, tell me again. HARRY: Come seek us where our voices sound. HERMIONE: The Black Lake, that's obvious. HARRY: An hour long you'll have to look. HERMIONE: Again obvious, although I admit, potentially problematic. HARRY: Potentially problematic? When was the last time you held your breath under the water for an hour, Hermione? HERMIONE: Look, Harry, we- we can do this. The three of us can figure it out. MAD-EYE MOODY: I hate to break up the skull session. Professor McGonagall would like to see you in her office. Not you, Potter, just Weasley and Granger. HERMIONE: But sir, the second task is only hours away and... MAD-EYE MOODY: Exactly. Presumably Potter is well prepared by now, and could do with a good night's sleep. Go. Now! ...Longbottom! MAD-EYE MOODY: Why don't you help Potter put his books back. NEVILLE: You know, i- if you're interested in plants, you'd be better with Gorshok's Guide to Herbology. Do you know there's a wizard i- in Nepal who’s growing gravity-resistant trees? HARRY: Neville, no offense, but I really don't care about plants. Now, if there's a Tibetan turnip that will allow me to breathe underwater for an hour, then great. But otherwise... NEVILLE: I don't know about a turnip, but you can always use gillyweed. -- Scene 19: The Second Task. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – shoreline – daytime FRED: Place you bets, place your bets... GEORGE: Place your bets... FRED: Aye, aye. Come on. Step up, mates, don’t be shy! GEORGE: Three hats... FRED: One lady... GEORGE: Four go down... FRED: If the four come up... GINNY: Don’t be so mean! GEORGE: Ten to one! HARRY: You're sure about this, Neville. NEVILLE: Absolutely. HARRY: For an hour. NEVILLE: Most likely. HARRY: Most likely? NEVILLE: Well, there is some debate among herbologists as to the effects of freshwater versus saltwater, but... HARRY: You're telling me this now? You must be joking. NEVILLE: I- I just wanted to help. HARRY: Well, that makes you sight better than Ron and Hermione. Where are they anyway? NEVILLE: You seem a little tense, Harry. HARRY: Do I? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – viewing stands DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified) Welcome to the second task. Last night something was stolen from each of our champions; a treasure of sorts. These four treasures, one for each champion, now lie on the bottom of the Black Lake. In order to win, each champion need only find their treasure and return to the surface. Simple enough, MAD-EYE MOODY: Put that in your mouth. DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified) ...except for this: they will have but one hour to do so, and one hour only. After that, they will be on their own. No magic will save them. You may begin at the sound of the cannon... (boom) CROWD: (cheers) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – underwater -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – viewing stands SEAMUS: What's the matter with him? DEAN THOMAS: I don't know. I can't see him! NEVILLE: Oh, my god! I've killed Harry Potter! SEAMUS: Yeah! DEAN THOMAS: Yeah! SEAMUS: Ha, ha! DEAN THOMAS: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – underwater MERPEOPLE: (singing) FLEUR: Oh! MERMAID: Whaaa! Ohhh! Ohh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – viewing stands DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified) The Beauxbatons champion, Miss Delacour, has unfortunately been forced to retire. She will take no further part in this task. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – underwater MERPEOPLE: (singing) MERMAID: Oooh! Oooh! Oooh! MERPERSON: Whaaa! HARRY: But, she's my friend, too! MERPERSON: Wha! Only one. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – surface CHO: Ahh... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – viewing stands CROWD: (cheering) DUMBLEDORE: Let’s get down below. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – surface HERMIONE: Ahh! KRUM: Huh... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – viewing stands CROWD: Krum, Krum, Krum, Krum... -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – surface HERMIONE AND KRUM: (coughing) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – viewing stands CROWD: (cheering) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – underwater HARRY: Ahh! Ugh! Ahh! Umph! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – surface RON: Ugh! GABRIELLE: Ah! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – viewing stands CROWD: (cheering) FRED: Yes! GEORGE: Whoo! FLEUR: Gabrielle! It’s fini! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – underwater HARRY: Ascentio! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – viewing stands DUMBLEDORE: Harry! HARRY: Ah- ah- ah... DUMBLEDORE: You’re alright. You’re alright now. SEAMUS: Get him another towel. DUMBLEDORE: I want all the judges over here, now. FLEUR: You saved her, even though she wasn't yours to save. My little sister! Thank you! And you... You helped! RON: Well... yeah... a bit. FLEUR: Ha, ha! Gabrielle, ... RON: Merci. HERMIONE: Harry! HARRY: Hermione. Ow! HERMIONE: Are you alright? You must be freezing! Personally, I think you behaved admirably. HARRY: I finished last, Hermione. Ah! HERMIONE: Next to last. Fleur never got past ze grindylows! CROWD: Krum, Krum! OTHERS: Diggory! CROWD: Krum, Krum! OTHERS: Diggory! KARKAROFF: Come on! Come on! DUMBLEDORE: Attention! CROWD: Krum, Krum, Krum... DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified) Attention! The winner is... Mr. Diggory! Who showed unique command of the Bubble-Head Charm. However, seeing as Mr. Potter would have finished first had it not been for his determination to rescue not only Mr. Weasley, but the others as well, we've agreed to award him... second place... CROWD: (Cheers) RON: Yes! HERMIONE: Second place! KARKAROFF: Ptuh! DUMBLEDORE: ...for outstanding moral fibre! DRACO: Boo! NIGEL: Yes! Ow! -- Scene 20: Never Whole Again. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – shoreline FRED: There you go. Call that moral fibre, eh? RON: Moral fiber? Blimey, even when you go wrong, it turns out right. GEORGE: Well done, ‘moral fibre.’ MR. CROUCH: Congratulations, Potter. Fine achievement. Well done, boy. RON: See you at Hagrid’s, Harry. MR. CROUCH: I'm sorry we haven't spoken. After all, your story is one I've heard so many times. And quite remarkable, isn’t it? Tragic of course, to lose one's family; never whole again, are we? Still, life goes on, and here we stand. I'm sure your parents would be very proud of you today, Potter. MAD-EYE MOODY: Bartemius! Not trying to lure Potter into one of the Ministry's summer internships, are we? The last boy who went into the Department of Mysteries never came out! MAD-EYE MOODY: And they say I'm mad. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dark Forest - night HAGRID: Though I remember, I remember when I first met you all. Biggest bunch of misfits I ever set eyes on. Suppose you reminded me of myself a little. And here we all are... four years later. RON: We're still a bunch of misfits. HAGRID: Well, maybe. But, we've all got each other, and Harry, of course. Soon to be! The youngest! Triwizard champion there's ever been! Hooray! A-ha-ha! Heh, heh. ALL: (singing) ‘Hogwarts, Hogwarts, hoggy-woggy Hogwarts, teach us something, please! Whether we be old and bald or young with scabby knees’... HARRY: Ah! Mr. Crouch? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dumbledore’s office - night DUMBLEDORE: A man has died here, Fudge, and he won't be the last. You must take action. FUDGE: I will not. In times like these the wizard world looks to its leaders for strength, Dumbledore. DUMBLEDORE: Then for once, show them some. FUDGE: The Triwizard Tournament will not be cancelled. I will not be seen as a coward. DUMBLEDORE: A true leader does what is right, no matter what others think. FUDGE: What did you say? What did you say to me? MAD-EYE MOODY: Excuse me, gentlemen. It may interest you to know this conversation is no longer private. FUDGE: Well, Harry! Harry, how good to see you again. HARRY: I can come back later, Professor. DUMBLEDORE: Oh, not necessary, Harry. The minister and I are done. I'll be back in a moment. Minister, after you. There you are, ha, ha. Oh, Harry, do feel free to indulge in a little licorice snap in my absence, but I have to warn you, they're a wee bit sharp. -- Scene 21: The Pensieve. FAWKES: Rrrra... HARRY: Agh! -- LOCATION: Pensieve – Courtroom HARRY: Ahhhhh! Umph! Ah- ah! HARRY: Professor? MAN: Professor. DUMBLEDORE: Ah. MR. CROUCH: Igor Karkaroff, you have been brought from Azkaban at your own request to present evidence to this counsel. Should your testimony prove consequential, Counsel may be prepared to order your immediate release. Until such time, you remain in the eyes of the Ministry a convicted Death Eater. Do you accept these terms? KARKAROFF: I do, sir. MR. CROUCH: What do you wish to present? KARKAROFF: I have names, sir. Ah- There was a Rosier, Evan Rosier. MR. CROUCH: Mr. Rosier is dead. KARKAROFF: Dead? MAD-EYE MOODY: Yeah, he took a piece of me with him though, didn't he? KARKAROFF: I didn't know. MR. CROUCH: If that is all the witness has to offer... KARKAROFF: No! No! No! No! There was Rookwood, he was a spy. MR. CROUCH: Augustus Rookwood? Of the Department of Mysteries? KARKAROFF: Ya, ya, the same. He passed information to You-Know-Who from inside the Ministry itself. MR. CROUCH: Very well, Counsel will deliberate. In the meantime, you will be returned to Azkaban. KARKAROFF: No! Wait! Wait, please, please! I have more. What about Snape, Severus Snape? DUMBLEDORE: As the counsel is very much aware I have given evidence on this matter. Severus Snape was indeed a Death Eater, and prior to Lord Voldemort's downfall turned spy for us at great personal risk. Today, he's no more a Death Eater than I am. KARKAROFF: It's a lie! Severus Snape remains faithful to the Dark Lord. MR. CROUCH: Silence! Unless the witness possesses any genuine name of consequence, this session is now concluded. KARKAROFF: Oh, no, no, no, no! I heard about one more. MR. CROUCH: What's that? KARKAROFF: The name... MR. CROUCH: Yes? KARKAROFF: I know for a fact this person took part in the capture, and by means of the Cruciatus Curse, torture, of the auror Frank Longbottom and his wife! MR. CROUCH: The name! Give me the wretched name! KARKAROFF: Barty Crouch! RITA SKEETER: Oaah! KARKAROFF: ... Junior. CROWD: Ah! Ohh! OTHER: Hold him! Hold him down! BARTY CROUCH JUNIOR: Ah! Get your filthy hands off me, you pathetic little men. Hello, father. MR. CROUCH: You are no son of mine. BARTY CROUCH JUNIOR: Gahhhh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dumbledore’s office - night DUMBLEDORE: Curiosity's not a sin, Harry, but you should exercise caution. It's a Pensieve. Very useful if, like me, you find your mind a wee bit stretched. It allows me to see what small things I've already seen. You see, Harry, I've searched and searched for something, some small detail, something I might have overlooked, something that would explain why these terrible things have happened. Every time I get close to an answer, it slips away. It's maddening. -- Scene 22: Dreams and Suspicions. HARRY: Sir, Mr. Crouch's son, what exactly happened to him? DUMBLEDORE: He was sent to Azkaban. Destroyed Barty to do it, but he had no choice. The evidence was overwhelming. Why do you ask? HARRY: It's just that I- I had a dream about him. It was in the summer, before school. In the dream, I was in a house, and Voldemort was thereonly he wasn't quite human- and Wormtail was there, too, and Mr. Crouch's son. DUMBLEDORE: Have there been others like this dream? HARRY: Yes, always the same one. Sir... these dreams- what I see- you don't think it's actually happening, do you? DUMBLEDORE: I think it's unwise for you to linger over these dreams, Harry. I think it's best that you simply... cast them away. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor - night KARKAROFF: It's a sign, Severus. You know what it means, as well as I. SNAPE: Potter! What's your hurry? Congratulations. Your performance in the Black Lake was inspiring. Gillyweed, am I correct? HARRY: Yes, sir. SNAPE: Ingenious. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Snape’s storeroom - night SANPE: A rather rare herb, the gillyweed. Not something found in your every day garden. Nor is this. Know what it is? HARRY: Bubble juice, sir? SNAPE: Veritaserum. Three drops of this, and You-Know-Who himself would spill his darkest secrets. The use of it on a student is, regrettably, forbidden. However, should you ever steal from my personal stores again, my hand might just slip over your morning pumpkin juice. HARRY: I haven't stolen anything. SNAPE: Don't lie to me. Gillyweed might be innocuous, but boomslang skin? Lacewing flies? You and your little friends are brewing Polyjuice potion, and believe me, I'm going to find out why. -- Scene 23: The Third Task. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – Maze entrance - daytime CROWD: (Cheering) Yeah! DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified) Silence! Earlier today, Professor Moody placed the Triwizard Cup deep within the maze. Only he knows its exact position. Now, as Mr. Diggory... CROWD: Yeah! DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified) ...and Mr. Potter... CROWD: Yeah! DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified) ...are tied for first position, they will be the first to enter the maze, followed by Mr. Krum... CROWD: Yeah! KARKAROFF: Come on! Krum, Krum, Krum... DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified)...and Miss Delacour. CROWD: Yeah! DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified) The first person to touch the Cup will be the winner! CROWD: Yeah! DUMBLEDORE: (Amplified) I've instructed the staff to patrol the perimeter. If, at any point, should a contestant should wish to withdraw from the task, he or she need only send up red sparks with their wands. Contestants, gather round... quickly! DUMBLEDORE: In the maze you'll find no dragons or creatures of the deep. Instead, you'll face something even more challenging. You see, people change in the maze. Oh, find the Cup, if you can, but be very wary. You could just lose yourselves along the way. DUMBLEDORE: Champions! Prepare yourselves. CROWD: Yeah! AMOS DIGGORY: Cedric, good luck! Good boy! DUMBLEDORE: On the count of three... One... (Boom) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Maze HARRY: Ah! CEDRIC: Oh! Ah! FLEUR: Ah...oh...Aeahhh! HARRY: Fleur? Fleur! Periculum! KRUM: Lagrovari! CEDRIC: Get down! Get down! KRUM: Lagrovari! CEDRIC: Expelliarmus! HARRY: No, don’t- stop! He's bewitched, Cedric. CEDRIC: Get off me! HARRY: He's bewitched! HARRY: Yes! CEDRIC: Harry! Harry! Harry! Harry! HARRY: Reducto! CEDRIC: Th- thanks. HARRY: No problem. CEDRIC: You know, for a moment there, I thought y- you were gonna let it get me. HARRY: For a moment, so did I. CEDRIC: Some game, huh? HARRY: Some game. CEDRIC: Go! -- Scene 24; Flesh, Blood and Bone. CEDRIC: Go on, take it. You saved me, take it! HARRY: Together. One, two, three! CEDRIC: Three! -- LOCATION: Riddle House - graveyard – night CEDRIC: You OK? HARRY: Yeah, you? CEDRIC: Where are we? HARRY: I've been here before! CEDRIC: It's a Portkey. Harry, the cup is a Portkey. HARRY: I've been here before, in a dream. Cedric, we have to get back to the cup. Now! CEDRIC: What are you talking about? HARRY: Ah! Arhh! Oh! CEDRIC: Harry, what is it? HARRY: Get back to the Cup! CEDRIC: Who are you? What do you want? VOLDEMORT: Kill the spare. WORMTAIL: Avada Kedavra! HARRY: No! Cedric! Ah! Ah! Ah! VOLDEMORT: Do it, now! WORMTAIL: Bone of the father, unwillingly given. WORMTAIL: Flesh of the servant, willingly sacrificed. WORMTAIL: Blood of the enemy, forcibly taken. HARRY: Ah! Arhh! WORMTAIL: The Dark Lord shall rise again. HARRY: Arhh! Ahh! Oh! Ah! Ah! -- Scene 23: The Death Eaters. VOLDEMORT: Ah-hah. My wand, Wormtail. VOLDEMORT: Hold out your arm. WORMTAIL: Master! Thank you, Master. VOLDEMORT: The other arm, Wormtail. VOLDEMORT: Welcome, my friends. Thirteen years it's been, and yet here you stand before me as though it were only yesterday. I confess myself... disappointed. Not one of you tried to find me. Crabbe! Macnair! Goyle! Not even you... Lucius. LUCIUS MALFOY: My Lord, had I detected any sign, or a whisper, of your whereabouts... VOLDEMORT: There were signs, my slippery friend, and more than whispers. LUCIUS MALFOY: I assure you, my Lord, I have never renounced the old ways. The face I have been obliged to present each day since your absence, ...that was my true mask. WORMTAIL: I returned. VOLDEMORT: Out of fear, not loyalty. Still, you have proved yourself useful these past few months, Wormtail. WORMTAIL: Oh! Thank you, Master. Thank you! VOLDEMORT: Oh, tsk, tsk, tsk. Such a handsome boy. HARRY: Don't touch him! VOLDEMORT: Harry! Oh, I'd almost forgotten you were here, standing on the bones of my father. I'd introduce you, but word has it you're almost as famous as me these days. ‘The boy who lived.’ How lies have fed your legend Harry. Shall I reveal what really happened that night thirteen years ago? Shall I divulge how I truly lost my powers? It was love. You see, when dear, sweet Lily Potter gave her life for her only son, she provided the ultimate protection. I could not touch him. It was old magic, something I should have foreseen. But, no matter, no matter. Things have changed. I can touch you... now! HARRY: Oh! Ow! Arh! Ahh! Ahhh! Ah, ah, ahhhhh! VOLDEMORT: Ahh! Ha! Astonishing what a few drops of your blood will do, eh, Harry? -- Scene 26: Priori Incantatem. VOLDEMORT: Pick up your wand, Potter. I said, ‘Pick it up.’ Get up! Get up! You've been taught how to duel, I presume, yes? First, we bow to each other. Come on now, Harry, the niceties must be observed. Dumbledore wouldn’t want you to forget your manners now, would he? I said, ‘Bow!’... HARRY: Ohh! VOLDEMORT: That's better. And, now... Crucio! HARRY: Ahhh! VOLDEMORT: Crucio! Atta boy, Harry. Your parents would be proud; especially your filthy, Muggle mother. HARRY: Expelliam... Ahh! VOLDEMORT: I'm going to kill you, Harry Potter. I'm going to destroy you. After tonight, no one will ever again question my powers. After tonight, if they speak of you, they'll speak only of how you... begged for death. And I, being a merciful Lord, obliged. Get up! HARRY: Ahh! Oh! VOLDEMORT: Don't you turn your back on me, Harry Potter. I want you to look at me when I kill you. I want to see the lights leave your eyes... HARRY: Have it your way. Expelliarmus! VOLDEMORT: Avada Kedavra! Do nothing! He is mine to finish... He's mine! JAMES POTTER: Harry, when the connection is broken, you must get to the Portkey. We can ring him for a moment to give you time, but only a moment. Do you understand? CEDRIC: Harry, take my body back, will you? Take my body back to my father. LILY POTTER: Let go. Sweetheart, you're ready. Let go! Let gooo! HARRY: Accio! VOLDEMORT: Arrgh! No! -- Scene 27: Veritaserum. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Quidditch Pitch – Maze entrance – night HARRY: Umph! ARTHUR WEASLEY: Ha-ha! AMOS DIGGORY: Yea! CROWD: Yeah! FRED AND GEORGE: Yeah! AMOS DIGGORY: He did it! Ha, ha! FLEUR: Ahh-ee! DUMBLEDORE: Harry! Harry! HARRY: Ah-huh! No! No! CORNELIUS FUDGE: For god’s sake, Dumbledore, what’s happened? HARRY: He's back, he's back! Voldemort's back! Cedric, he asked me to bring his body back. I couldn't leave him, not there! DUMBLEDORE: It's alright, Harry, it's alright. He's home. You both are. FUDGE: Keep everybody in their seats. A boy has just been killed. The body must be moved, Dumbledore, there are... too many people. AMOS DIGGORY: Let me through. Let me through! Let me through... HARRY: Ahh-huh-huh... AMOS DIGGORY: That's my son! That’s my boy! My boy! Ah-huh-huh... CHO: Ah-huh... MAD-EYE MOODY: Come on, get up. Easy. Easy. This is not where you want to be right now. Come on. AMOS DIGGORY: No... Noooo! Ahhh! MAD-EYE MOODY: It’s alright. I’ve got you... I’ve got you. Come on. Easy now. AMOS DIGGORY: Ahhh! Whaa-hah! Naaa! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – Quidditch pitch and castle – night -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Moody’s office - night MAD-EYE MOODY: Are you alright, Potter? HARRY: (nods) MAD-EYE MOODY: Does it hurt... that? HARRY: Not so much now. MAD-EYE MOODY: Perhaps I'd better take a look at it. HARRY: The cup was a Portkey. Someone had bewitched it. MAD-EYE MOODY: What was it like? What was he like? HARRY: Who? MAD-EYE MOODY: The Dark Lord. HARRY: Ah! MAD-EYE MOODY: What was it like, to stand in his presence? HARRY: I dunno. It was like I'd fallen into one of my dreams, into one of my nightmares. MAD-EYE MOODY: Were there others? In the graveyard, were there others? HARRY: Um...uh... I- I don't... think I said anything about a graveyard, Professor. MAD-EYE MOODY: Marvelous creatures, dragons, aren't they? Do you think that miserable oaf would have led you into the woods if I hadn't suggested it? Do you think Cedric Diggory would have told you to hold the egg under the water if I hadn't have told him first, myself? Do you think Neville Longbottom, the witless wonder, could have provided you with gillyweed if I hadn't have given him the book that led him straight to it? Huh? Eh? HARRY: It was you from the beginning. You put my name in the Goblet of Fire. You bewitched Krum. But... MAD-EYE MOODY: ‘But, boo-hoo’. You won because I made it so, Potter. You ended up in that graveyard tonight because it was meant to be so. And now the deed is done. The blood that runs through these veins runs within the Dark Lord. Imagine how he will reward me when he learns that I have, once and for all, silenced the great Harry Potter. (Bam) DUMBLEDORE: Expelliarmus! DUMBLEDORE: Severus... DUMBLEDORE: Do you know who I am? MAD-EYE MOODY: Albus Dumbledore. DUMBLEDORE: Are you Alastor Moody? Are ya? MAD-EYE MOODY: No. DUMBLEDORE: Is he in this room? Is he in this room? MAD-EYE MOODY: (nods) DUMBLEDORE: Harry get away from there! DUMBLEDORE: You alright, Alastor? ALASTOR: I'm sorry, Albus. HARRY: That's Moody, but then who's...? SNAPE: Polyjuice potion. DUMBLEDORE: Now we know who's been stealing from your stores, Severus. DUMBLEDORE: We'll get you up in a minute. BARTY CROUCH JUNIOR: Arhh! Arrrh! Ugh! DUMBLEDORE: Barty Crouch Junior. BARTY CROUCH JUNIOR: I'll show you mine, if you show me yours. DUMBLEDORE: Your arm, Harry. BARTY CROUCH JUNIOR: You know what this means, don't you? He's back. Lord Voldemort has returned. HARRY: I’m sorry, sir. I couldn’t help it. DUMBLEDORE: Send an owl to Azkaban. I think they'll find they're missing a prisoner. BARTY CROUCH JUNIOR: I'll be welcomed back like a hero. DUMBLEDORE: Perhaps. Personally, I've never had much time for heroes. -- Scene 28: Parting Ways. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – daytime -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall - daytime DUMBLEDORE: Today we acknowledge a really terrible loss. Cedric Diggory was, as you all know, exceptionally hard working, infinitely fairminded, and, most importantly, a fierce, fierce friend. Now, I think, therefore, you have the right to know exactly how he died. You see, Cedric Diggory was murdered... by Lord Voldemort. The Ministry of Magic does not wish me to tell you this. But, not to do so, I think, would be an insult to his memory. Now, the pain we all feel at this dreadful loss reminds me, and reminds us, that while we may come from different places and speak in different tongues, our hearts beat as one. In light of recent events, the bonds of friendship we’ve made this year will be more important than ever. Remember that, and Cedric Diggory will not have died in vain. You remember that, and we'll celebrate a boy who was kind, and honest, and brave, and true, right to the very end. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory - daytime DUMBLEDORE: Huh... I never liked these curtains. Set them on fire in my fourth year; by accident, of course. I put you in terrible danger this year, Harry. I'm sorry. HARRY: Professor, when I was in the graveyard, there was a moment... um... when Voldemort's wand and mine sort of connected. DUMBLEDORE: Priori Incantatem... You saw your parents that night, didn't you? They reappeared. DUMBLEDORE: No spell can reawaken the dead, Harry. I trust you know that. Dark and difficult times lie ahead. Soon we must all face the choice between what is right, and what is easy. But remember this, you have friends here. You're not alone. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – courtyard - daytime KRUM: Hermione, this is for you. Write to me, promise. HERMIONE: Bye. OTHER: That’s great! GABRIELLE: (kiss) FLEUR: (kiss) Au revoir, Ron. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – Durmstrang ship – exterior – daytime (boom) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – hallway – daytime STUDENTS: Yeah! RON: Do you think we'll ever just have a quiet year at Hogwarts? HARRY AND HERMIONE: No. RON: Well, I didn't think so. Oh, well. What’s life without a few dragons? HERMIONE: Everything's going to change now, isn't it? HARRY: Yes. HERMIONE: Promise you'll write this summer, both of you. RON: Well, I won't. You know I won't! HERMIONE: Harry will, won't you? HARRY: Yeah, every week. RON: Ha, ha! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Black Lake – Durmstrang ship – Beauxbatons carriage -- Scene 29: End Credits -- THE END

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix -- LOCATION: Number Four, Privet Drive TV WEATHERMAN: … It is hot, and it’s going to get even worse. Temperatures up in the mid-thirties, that’s the midnineties in Fahrenheit, tomorrow, and maybe up to 100… -- LOCATION: Playground in Little Whinging HARRY : Hey, big D. You beat up another ten-year old? DUDLEY: This one deserved it. FRIENDS: Yeah. HARRY: Five against one; very brave. DUDLEY: Well you’re one to talk, moaning in your sleep every night. At least I’m not afraid of my pillow. FRIENDS: Heh, heh. Ha, ha, ha! DUDLEY: “Don’t kill Cedric!” Who’s Cedric, your boyfriend? “He’s going to kill me, Mom!” Where is your mom? Where is your mom, Potter? She dead? Is she dead!? Is she dead, PotFRIENDS: Whoa! Ha, ha, ha, ha…ha…ha…ha…Dudley… we’ve got to go… DUDLEY: What are you doing? HARRY: I’m not doing anything! FRIENDS: Come on Dudley! Come on, Dud, let’s go… - LOCATION: Road through Little Whinging -- LOCATION: Underpass near park – pouring rain, cold as ice -- HARRY: Ah! Dudley, run! DUDLEY: Ah… ahhh… HARRY: Ahh… Expecto Patronum! HARRY: Mrs. Figg! MRS. FIGG: Don’t put away your wand, Harry, they might come back. Dementors in Little Whinging, whatever’s next? The whole world’s gone topsy-turvy… HARRY: I don’t understand, how do you know aboutMRS. FIGG: Dumbledore asked me to keep an eye on you. HARRY: Dumbledore? You know Dumbledore? -- LOCATION: Privet Drive, Little Whinging, street MRS. FIGG: Uh-huh. After You-Know-Who killed that poor Diggory boy last year, did you expect him to let you go wandering around on your own? Good lord, boy, they told me you were intelligent. Now get inside and stay there, and someone will be in touch soon. Whatever happens, don’t leave the house! -- LOCATION: Number Four, Privet Drive - interior -- TV WEATHERMAN: It is hot. That’s right hot, everywhere and the sweat is stifling. Surrey’s just burning up… AUNT PETUNIA: Duddikins, is that you? Duddy… Vernon, come quick! UNCLE VERNON: Who did this to you, boy? DUDLEY: (points at Harry) UNCLE VERNON: Happy, are we, now? Eh? You’ve finally done it. You’ve finally driven him loopy. J-j-just look at him, Petunia! Our boy has gone yumpy. I’ve reached my limit, do you hear? This is the last I’m going to take of you and your nonsense! MoM LETTER: “Dear Mr. Potter, the Ministry has received intelligence that at six twenty-three this evening you performed the Patronus Charm in the presence of a Muggle. As a clear violation of the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery, you are hereby expelled from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Hoping you are well, Mafalda Hopkirk UNCLE VERNON: Justice! -- LOCATION: Outside Number Four, Privet Drive - driveway AUNT PETUNIA: Oh dear… Ohhh… Oh, dear…. -- LOCATION: Number Four, Privet Drive - Harry’s bedroom HARRY: (bam) (hits wall with fist) HARRY: Sorry, Hedwig. -- LOCATION: Harry’s dreams -- LOCATION: Number Four, Privet Drive - Harry’s bedroom (creak) TONKS: I can’t believe these Muggles… MOODY: Tonks, for god sakes… HARRY: Professor Moody, what are you doing here? MOODY: Rescuing you, of course. -- LOCATION: Outside Number Four, Privet Drive – driveway and street HARRY: But where are we going? The letter said I’ve been expelled from Hogwarts. MOODY: Well you haven’t been, not yet. Dedalus, you take point… HARRY: But the letter said… SHAKLEBOLT: Dumbledore has persuaded the Minister to suspend your expulsion pending a formal hearing. HARRY: A hearing? SHAKLEBOLT: Uh, huh. TONKS: Don’t worry, Harry. We’ll explain when we get back to Headquarters. MOODY: Shhh, not here, Nymphadora. TONKS: Don’t call me Nymphadora. MOODY: Stay in formation, everyone. Don’t break ranks if one of us is killed. -- LOCATION: Flying to London and over London -- LOCATION: No. Twelve, Grimmauld Place – exterior MOODY: Come on. (tap, tap, tap) In you go, son. -- LOCATION: Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place – interior SIRIUS: …Voldemort is getting stronger and stronger by the minute! We have to act now! MRS. WEASLEY: Harry… HARRY: Mrs. Weasley! MRS. WEASLEY: Thank heavens you’re alright! Bit peaky? But I’m afraid dinner will have to wait until the meeting’s finished. HARRY: But I… MRS. WEASLEY: Uh-uh. No time to explain. Straight upstairs, first door on the left. Yeah! -- LOCATION: Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place - upstairs KREACHER: ….the scum in her house….What would you say to old Kreacher….oh, the shame…Kreacher is here… -- LOCATION: Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place – upstairs bedroom HERMIONE: Harry! Are you all right? We’ve heard them talking about the Dementor attack. You must tell us everything… RON: Let the man breathe, Hermione. HERMIONE: And the hearing at the Ministry. It’s just outrageous! I’ve looked it all up, and they just can’t expel you. It’s completely unfair. RON: Yeah. HARRY: There’s a lot of that going around at the moment. So what is this place? RON: It’s Headquarters. HERMIONE: Of the Order of the Phoenix. It’s a secret society. Dumbledore formed it back when they first fought You-Know-Who. HARRY: Couldn’t have put that into a letter, I suppose. I’ve gone all summer without a scrap of news. RON: We wanted to write, mate. Really, we did. Only… HARRY: Only what? HERMIONE: Only Dumbledore made us promise not to tell you anything. HARRY: Dumbledore said that? B-but why would he want to keep me in the dark. Maybe I could help. After all, I-I’m the one who saw Voldemort return, I’m the one who fought him, I’m the one who saw Cedric Diggory get killed… FRED: Hi Harry, thought we heard your dulcet tones. GEORGE: Don’t bottle it up, though mate, belt it out. FRED: Anyway, if you’re all through shouting, do you want to hear something a little more interesting? -- LOCATION: Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place – stairs – using extendible ear MRS. WEASLEY: …He’s not James, Sirius! SIRIUS: He’s not your son. MRS. WEASLY: He’s as good as. Who else has he got? SIRIUS: He’s got me. SNAPE: How touchingly paternal, Black, perhaps Potter will grow up to be a felon just like his godfather. SIRIUS: You stay out of this, Snivellus. HARRY: Snape’s part of the Order? RON: Yeah. HERMIONE: Crookshanks! RON: Hermione, I hate your cat. -- LOCATION: Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place - downstairs MRS. WEASLEY: Well, the meeting’s over, just…Oh! Just because you’re allowed to use magic now does not mean you have to whip your wand out for every little thing! You hungry, Harry? ARTHUR: You sure you’re alright, Harry? You gave us quite a turn… SIRIUS: Harry Potter… HARRY: Sirius! SIRIUS: Huh-ho! -- LOCATION: Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place - kitchen ARTHUR: It’s really very peculiar. It seems that your hearing at the ministry is to be before the entire Wizengamot. HARRY: I don’t understand. What has the Ministry of Magic got against me? MOODY: Show him. He’ll find out soon enough. SIRIUS: He’s been attacking Dumbledore, as well. Fudge is using all of his powers, including his influence at the Daily Prophet, to smear anyone who claims the Dark Lord has returned. HARRY: Why? LUPIN: The Minister thinks Dumbledore is after his job. HARRY: But that’s insane! No one in their right mind would believe that Dumbledore… LUPIN: Exactly the point – Fudge isn’t in his right mind. It’s been twisted and warped by fear. Now fear makes people do terrible things, Harry. Now, the last time Voldemort gained power he almost destroyed everything we hold most dear. Now he’s returned, and I’m afraid the Minister will do almost anything to avoid facing the terrifying truth. SIRIUS: We think Voldemort wants to build up his army again. Fourteen years ago he had huge numbers at his command – not just witches and wizards, but all manner of Dark creatures. He’s been recruiting heavily, and we’ve been attempting to do the same, but gathering followers isn’t the only thing he’s interested in… ARTHUR: Ahem… SIRIUS: We believe Voldemort may be after something…. MOODY: Sirius… SIRIUS: …Something he didn’t have last time… HARRY: You mean, like a weapon? MRS. WEASLEY: No. That’s enough. He’s just a boy! You say much more and you might as well induct him into the Order straightaway. HARRY: Good! I want to join. If Voldemort’s raising an army, then I want to fight! SRIUS: (winks) -- LOCATION: Harry’s dreams - various -- LOCATION: London street -- LOCATION: London Underground ARTHUR: Trains, underground! -- LOCATION: London Street – red telephone box ARTHUR: There we are. I’ve never used the visitor’s entrance before. It should be fun. I’ll just get my Muggle money… -- LOCATION: Ministry of Magic – entry hall NEWSPAPER SELLER: Get a Daily Prophet… Dumbledore: is he daft or is he dangerous? BOB: Morning, Arthur. ARTHUR: Morning, Bob. Interdepartmental memos. We used to use owls. Mess was unbelievable…. SHACKLEBOLT: (whispers) ARTHUR: Merlin’s beard, I don’t believe it. Thank you, Kingsley. They’ve changed the time of your hearing. HARRY : When is it? ARTHUR: In five minutes. ELEVATOR SPEAKER: Department of Mysteries LUCIUS MALFOY: …Minister, I know you’ll do the right thing… CORNELIUS FUDGE: Yes, but we must… ARTHUR: Remember, during the hearing, speak only when you are spoken to. Keep calm, you’ve done nothing wrong. As the Muggles say, “Truth will out!” Yes? HARRY: Um. ARTHUR: I’m not allowed in, I’m afraid. Good luck, Harry. -- LOCATION: Ministry of Magic – court room CORNELIUS FUDGE: (bangs gavel three times) This is a disciplinary hearing into the offences committed by Harry James Potter, resident at number four, Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey. The interrogator is Cornelius Oswald Fudge, Minister of - DUMBLEDORE: -Witness for the Defense, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. CORNELIUS FUDGE: You- you got our message that the time and place of the hearing had been changed, did you? DUMBLEDORE: I must have missed it, but by a happy mistake, I arrived at the Ministry three hours early. Charges? CORNELIUS FUDGE: The charges against the accused are as follows: that he did knowingly, and in full awareness of the illegality of his actions, produce a Patronus Charm in the presence of a Muggle. Do you deny producing said Patronus? HARRY: No, but… CORNELIUS FUDGE: And are you aware that you are forbidden to use magic outside of school while under the age of seventeen? HARRY: Yes, I ju- CORNELIUS FUDGE: Witches and wizards of the WizengamotHARRY: I was only doing it because of the Dementors! MADAM BONES: Dementors? In Little WhingingCORNELIUS FUDGE: Why that’s quite clever! Muggles can’t see Dementors, can they, boy? Highly convenient… HARRY: I’m not lying! There were two of them, and if I hadn’t they… CORNELIUS FUDGE: Enough! I’m sorry to interrupt what I’m sure would have been a very well-rehearsed story, but since you can produce no witnesses of the event… DUMBLEDORE: Pardon me, Minister, but as it happens, we can… -- LOCATION: Ministry of Magic – court room - later MADAM BONES: Please describe the attack. What did they look like? MRS. FIGG: Well, one of them was very large, and the other rather skinny. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Not the boys, the Dementors. MRS. FIGG: Oh right, right. Well, big, cloaked, then everything went cold, as though all of the happiness had gone from the world. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Now look here, Dementors don’t just wander into a Muggle suburb and happen across a wizard, the- the odds are astronomical, heh, heh… DUMBLEDORE: I don’t think that anyone believes that the Dementors were there by coincidence, Minister. UMBRIDGE: Ahem… I’m sure I must have misunderstood you, Professor. The Dementors are, after all, under the control of the Ministry of Magic. So silly of me. But it sounded for a moment as though you were suggesting that the Ministry had ordered the attack on this boy… DUMBLEDORE: That would be disturbing, indeed, Madam Undersecretary, which is why I am sure that the Ministry will be announcing a full-scale inquiry into why the two Dementors were so very far from Azkaban and why they mounted an attack without authorization. Of course, there is someone who might be behind the attack… Cornelius, I implore you to see reason. The evidence that the Dark Lord has returned is incontrovertible. CORNELIUS FUDGE: He’s not back! DUMBLEDORE: In the matter of Harry Potter, the law clearly states that magic may be used before Muggles in lifethreatening situations. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Laws can be changed if necessary, Dumbledore. DUMBLEDORE: Clearly, it has become the practice to hold a full criminal trial to deal with a simple matter of under-age magic! MADAM BONES: Those in favor of conviction… MADAM BONES: Those in favor of clearing the accused of all charges… CORNELIUS FUDGE: Cleared of all charges…(bang) HARRY: Professor? -- LOCATION: London street and stairs to train station SIRIUS: (as dog) (bark) MOODY: Padfoot, are you barking mad? You could blow the entire operation! -- LOCATION: London – empty train station waiting room SIRIUS: Harry… HARRY: Sirius, what are you doing here? If someone sees you… SIRIUS: I had to see you off, didn’t I? What’s life without a little risk? HARRY: I don’t want to see you get thrown back in Azkaban. SIRIUS: Oh, don’t worry about me. Anyway, I wanted you to have this… the original Order of the Phoenix. Marlene McKinnon, she was killed two weeks after this was taken. Voldemort wiped out her entire family. Frank and Alice Longbottom… HARRY: Neville’s parents. SIRIUS: They suffered a fate worse than death, if you ask me. It’s been fourteen years, and still a day doesn’t go by I don’t miss your dad. HARRY: Do you really think there’s going to be a war, Sirius? SIRIUS: It feels like it did before… you keep it. Anyway, I suppose you’re the young ones now. -- LOCATION: Harry’s dream - Platform nine and three-quarters -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – interior -- LOCATION: Hogwarts Express – exterior - countryside -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade Station DRACO: I surprised the Ministry still lets you walk around free, Potter. You better enjoy it while you can. I heard there’s a cell in Azkaban with your name on it…What’d I tell you… a complete nutter. HARRY: You stay away from me! RON: It’s only Malfoy. What’d you expect? -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - Loading carriages for Hogwarts NEVILLE: Hi, Harry. HARRY, RON, HERMIONE: Hi, Neville. HARRY: What is it? RON: What’s what? HARRY: That, pulling the carriage. HERMIONE: Nothing’s pulling the carriage, Harry. It’s pulling itself, like always. LUNA: You’re not going mad. I can see them, too. You’re just as sane as I am. HERMIONE: Everyone, this is Loony Love-… Luna Lovegood. That’s an interesting necklace. LUNA: It’s a charm, actually. It keeps away the Nargles. I’m hungry. I hope there’s pudding. RON: What’s a Nargle? HARRY: No idea. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Great Hall DUMBLEDORE: Good evening, children. Now, we have two changes in staffing this year. We are pleased to welcome back Professor Grubbly-Plank, who’ll be taking Care of Magical Creatures while Professor Hagrid is on temporary leave. We also wish to welcome our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, Professor Dolores Umbridge. I’m sure you’ll all join me in wishing the Professor good luck. Now, as usual, our caretaker, Mr. Filch, has asked me to remind you… UMBRIDGE: Hem, hem… hee, hee…. HARRY: She was at my hearing, she works for Fudge. UMBRIDGE: Thank you, Headmaster, for those kind words of welcome. And how lovely to see all your bright, happy faces smiling up at me. I’m sure we’re all going to be very good friends. FRED AND GEORGE: That’s likely. UMBRIDGE: The Ministry of Magic has always considered the education of young witches and wizards to be of vital importance. Although each headmaster has brought something new to this historic school,… progress for the sake of progress must be discouraged. Let us preserve what must be preserved, perfect what can be perfected, and prune practices that ought to be prohibited. Hee, hee… DUMBLEDORE: (clapping) STUDENTS: (clapping) DUMBLEDORE: Thank you, Professor Umbridge, that really was most illuminating. RON: Illuminating? What a load of waffle. HARRY: What’s it mean? DUMBLEDORE: …magic is forbidden in the corridors… HERMIONE: It means the Ministry is interfering at Hogwarts. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room HARRY: Dean, Seamus, good holiday? DEAN: All right. Better than Seamus’s, anyway. SEAMUS: Me mum didn’t want me to come back this year. HARRY: Why not? SEAMUS: Let me see, uh, because of you. The Daily Prophet’s been saying a lot of thing about you, Harry, and about Dumbledore as well. HARRY: What, you mum believes them? SEAMUS: Well, nobody was there the night Cedric died… HARRY: Oh, so I guess you should just read the Prophet, like your stupid mother, it’ll tell you everything you want to know. SEAMUS: Don’t you dare talk about my mother like that! HARRY: I’ll take on anyone who calls me a liar. RON: What’s going on? SEAMUS: He’s mad, is what’s going on. Do you believe the rubbish he’s coming out with about You-KnowWho?

RON: Yeah, I do. Has anyone else got a problem with Harry? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory RON: You alright? HARRY: Fine. RON: Seamus was bang out of order, mate. But he’ll come through. You’ll see… HARRY: I said I’m fine, Ron! RON: Right. I’ll just leave you to your thoughts, then. -- LOCATION: Harry’s dreams -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – DADA classroom UMBRIDGE: Good morning, children. Ordinary Wizarding Level Examinations… O.W.L., more commonly known as “owls”. Study hard, and you will be rewarded. Fail to do so, and the consequences may be… severe. Your previous instruction in this subject has been disturbingly uneven, but you will be pleased to know from now on we will be following a carefully constructed, Ministry-approved course of defensive magic. HERMIONE: There’s nothing in here about using defensive spells… UMBRIDGE: Using spells? Ha, ha! Why, I can’t imagine why you would need to use spells in my classroom. RON: We’re not going to use magic? UMBRIDGE: You’ll be learning about defensive spells in a secure, risk-free way. HARRY: Well, what’s the good of that? If we’re going to be attacked, it’s not going to be “risk-free”.UMBRIDGE: Students will raise their hands to speak in my class. It is the view of the Ministry that a theoretical knowledge will be sufficient to get you through your examination which, after all, is what school is all about. HARRY: And how is theory supposed to prepare us for what’s out there? UMBRIDGE: There is nothing out there, dear. Who do you imagine wants to attack children, like yourselves? HARRY: Oh, I don’t know, maybe… Lord Voldemort? STUDENTS: (murmurs, chuckles) UMBRIDGE: Now let me make this quite plain. You have been told that a certain Dark wizard is at large once again. This…is…a…lie! HARRY: It’s not a lie! I saw him, I fought him! UMBRIDGE: Detention, Mr. PotterHARRY: So according to you, Cedric Diggory dropped dead of his own accord? UMBRIDGE: Cedric Diggory’s death was a tragic accident. HARRY: It was murder! Voldemort killed him – you must know that! UMBRIDGE: Enough! Enough. See me later, Mr. Potter, in my office. Hee, hee! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Professor Umbridge’s office HARRY: (knock, knock) UMBRIDGE: Come in. Good evening, Mr. Potter. Sit. You’re going to be doing some lines for me today, Mr. Potter. No, not with your quill. You’re going to be using a rather special one of mine. Now, I want you to write “I must not tell lies.” HARRY: How many times? UMBRIDGE: Well, let’s say… as long as it takes for the message to sink in. HARRY: You haven’t given me any ink. UMBRIDGE: Oh, you won’t need any ink. HARRY: Ah…uh! Uh…ah…(hand is being cut) UMBRIDGE: Yes? HARRY: Nothing. UMBRIDGE: That’s right. Because you know, deep down, that you deserve to be punished, don’t you Mr. Potter? Go on. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room FRED AND GEORGE: Skiving Snackboxes: sweets that make you ill; get you out of class whenever you like; exchange hours of pleasure for absolute boredom… RON: I’m not asking you to write all of it for me; HERMIONE: Oh, please! RON: …it’s just I’ve been so busy studying for these stupid O.W.L. exams. HERMIONE: I’ll read and correct them, that’s all. RON: Hermione, you’re the most wonderful person I’ve ever met. If I’m ever rude to you again… HERMIONE: I’ll know you’ve gone back to normal. Harry, what’s wrong with your hand? HARRY: Nothing. HERMIONE: The other hand. Oh – you’ve got to tell Dumbledore! HARRY: No – Dumbledore’s got enough on his mind right now. Anyway, I don’t want to give Umbridge the satisfaction. RON: Bloody hell, Harry, the hag is torturing you! If the parents knew about this… HARRY: Yeah, well I haven’t got any of those, have I Ronald? HERMIONE: Ah, Harry, you’ve got to report this. It’s perfectly simple, you justHARRY: No it’s not! Whatever this is, it’s not simple. You don’t understand. HERMIONE: Then help us to. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – scenery – watching Thestrals flying over the Dark Forest HARRY: “Dear Padfoot, I hope you’re all right. It’s starting to get colder here. Winter’s definitely on the way. In spite of being back at Hogwarts, I feel more alone that ever. I know you, of all people, will understand.” -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dark forest – with Thestrals LUNA: Hello, Harry Potter. HARRY: Your feet, aren’t they cold? LUNA: A bit. Unfortunately, all of my shoes have mysteriously disappeared. I think Nargles are behind it. HARRY: What are they? LUNA: They’re called Thestrals. They’re quite gentle, really, but people avoid them because they’re a bit… HARRY: Different. But why can’t the others see them? LUNA: They can only be seen by people who’ve seen death. HARRY: So, you’ve known someone who’s died, then? LUNA: My mum. She was quite an extraordinary witch, but she did like to experiment, and one day one of her spells went badly wrong. I was nine. HARRY: I’m sorry. LUNA: Yes, it was rather horrible. I do feel very sad about it sometimes, but I’ve got Dad. We both believe you, by the way, that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is back, and you fought him, and the Ministry and the paper are conspiring against you and Dumbledore… HARRY: Thanks. Seems you’re about the only ones who do. LUNA: I don’t think that’s true, but I imagine that’s how he wants you to feel. HARRY: What do you mean? LUNA: Well, if I were You-Know-Who, I’d want you to feel cut off from everyone else, because if it’s just you alone, you’re not as much of a threat. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Great Hall HERMIONE: Is that all you do, eat? RON: Wha- I’m hungry. HERMIONE: Harry… HARRY: Can I join you? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – staircase UMBRIDGE: Hee, hee… PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: I am merely requesting that when it comes to the students that you conform to the prescribed disciplinary practices! UMBRIDGE: So silly of me, but it sounds as though you’re questioning my authority in my own classroom, Minerva. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Not at all, Delores, merely your medieval methods. UMBRIDGE: I’m sorry, dear, but to question my authority is to question the Ministry, and by extension, the Minister, himself! I am a tolerant woman, but the one thing I will not stand for is disloyalty. PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Disloyalty! UMBRIDGE: Things at Hogwarts are far worse than I feared. Cornelius will want to take immediate action. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – entry hallway FILCH: (bang, bang, bang) (hanging decree) CORNELIUS FUDGE: (voice from Daily Prophet) …Having already revolutionized the teaching of Defense Against the Dark Arts, Dolores Umbridge will, as High Inquisitor, will have powers to address the seriously falling standards at Hogwarts School.” -- LOCATION: Divination classroom UMBRIDGE:…And you’ve been at Hogwarts how long, exactly? TRELAWNY: Oh,… -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Hanging decree in the entrance hall -- LOCATION: Potions Dungeon UMBRIDGE: You originally applied for the position of Dark Arts teacher? SNAPE: Yes. UMBRIDGE: But you were unsuccessful? SNAPE: Obviously. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Hanging decree in the entrance hall -- LOCATION: Divination classroom UMBRIDGE: Could you please… predict something for me ? PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Oh – -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Hanging decree in the entrance hall -- UMBRIDGE: One teeny little prophecy? Pity…. TRELAWNEY: No, wait, wait… I- I think I do see something, yes! I see something dark. You are in grave danger! UMBRIDGE: Lovely. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - entrance HARRY: Cho, what’s going on? CHO: Professor Trelawney… PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Oh….I-… Hogwarts is my home! Y-you can’t do this…. UMBRIDGE: Actually, I can. PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Minerva, I… UMBRIDGE: Is there something you’d like to say here? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Oh, there are several things I’d like to say…Here, shh, shh. DUMBLEDORE: Professor McGonagall, might I ask you to escort Sybill back inside, please? PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL: Certainly. PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY: Oh thank you… UMBRIDGE: Dumbledore, might I remind you that under the terms of Educational Decree Number Twenty-three signed by the Minister himself… DUMBLEDORE: You have the right to dismiss my teachers. You do not, however, have the authority to banish them from the grounds. That power remains with the headmaster. UMBRIDGE: For now… DUMBLEDORE: Don’t you all have studying to do? HARRY: Professor…Professor? Professor Dumbledore… Professor! Professor Dumbledore! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room HERMIONE: That foul, evil gargoyle! We’re not learning how to defend ourselves. We’re not learning to pass out O.W.L.s. …. CORNELIUS FUDGE: (radio) …security has been and will remain the Ministry’s top priority. Furthermore, we have convincing evidence that these disappearances are the work of notorious mass-murderer Sirius Black. Make no mistake, we will hunt him… HARRY: Sirius! What are you doing here? SIRIUS: (in fireplace) Answering your letter. You said you were worried about Umbridge. What’s she doing, training you to kill half-breeds? HARRY: Sirius, she’s not training us to do anything at all. SIRIUS: Well, I’m not surprised. The latest intelligence says that Fudge doesn’t want you trained in combat. RON: Combat? What’s he think, that we’re forming some sort of wizard army? SIRIUS: Well, that’s exactly what he thinks. That Dumbledore is assembling his own forces to take on the Ministry. He’s becoming more paranoid by the minute. The others wouldn’t want me telling you this, Harry, but things aren’t going at all well with the Order. Fudge is blocking the truth at every turn, and these disappearances are just how it started before. Voldemort is on the move. HARRY: Well, what can we do? SIRIUS: Someone’s coming! I’m sorry I can’t be of more help, bit for now, at least, it looks like you’re on your own. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room HERMIONE: He’s really out there, isn’t he? We’ve got to learn to defend ourselves. And if Umbridge refuses to teach us how, we need someone who will. -- LOCATION: Harry’s dreams -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade - street HARRY: This is mad! Who’d want to be taught by me? I’m a nutter, remember… RON: Look on the bright side, you can’t be any worse than old toad-face. HARRY: Thanks, Ron. RON: I’m with you, mate. HARRY: So who’s supposed to be meeting us, then? HERMIONE: Just a couple of people. -- LOCAITON: Hogsmeade – The Hog’s Head RON: Lovely spot. HERMIONE: It’s safer off of the beaten track. -- LOCAITON: Hogsmeade – The Hog’s Head - later HERMIONE: Um, hi. So, we all know why we’re here. We need a teacher; a proper teacher. One who’s had real experience in defending against the dark arts. ZACHARIAS SMITH: Why? RON: Why? Because You-Know-Who’s back, you tosh-pot. ZACHARIAS SMITH: So he says. HERMIONE: So Dumbledore says. ZACHARIAS SMITH: So Dumbledore says because he says. The point is, where’s the proof? ?: If Potter could tell us more about how Diggory got killed… HARRY: I’m not going to talk about Cedric, so if that’s why you’re here, you might as well clear out now. Come on, Hermione, let’s go, they just think I’m some sort of freak… HERMIONE: Wait… LUNA: Is it true that you can produce a Patronus Charm? HERMIONE: Yes. I’ve seen it. DEAN: Blimey, Harry, I didn’t know you could do that. NEVILLE: And he killed a basilisk, with the sword in Dumbledore’s office. HERMIONE: It’s true. RON: And third year he fought off about a hundred Dementors at once. HERMIONE: And last year he fought You-Know-Who in the flesh. HARRY: Hermione… Look, it all sounds great when you say it like that, but the truth is most of that was just luck. I didn’t know what I was doing half the time, and I nearly always had help. HERMIONE: You’re just being modest. HARRY: No, Hermione, I’m not… Facing this stuff in real life is not like school. In school, if you make a mistake, you can just try again tomorrow, but out there…when you’re a second away from being murdered, or watching a friend die right before your eyes… you don’t know what that’s like. HERMIONE: You’re right, Harry, we don’t. That’s why we need your help, if we’re going to have any chance when facing… Voldemort. NIGEL: He’s really back. -- LOCATION: Hogsmeade – The Hog’s Head – signing the DA list -- LOCATION: walking back to Hogwarts HARRY: Right, first we need to find a place to practice where Umbridge won’t find out. GINNY: The Shrieking Shack. HARRY: It’s too small. GINNY: Harry, what happens if Umbridge does find out? HERMIONE: Who cares? I mean, it’s kind of exciting, isn’t it, breaking the rules? RON: Who are you, and what have you done with Hermione Granger? HERMIONE: Well, anyway, at least we know one good thing that’s come out of today. HARRY: What’s that? HERMIONE: Cho couldn’t keep her eyes off you, could she? HARRY: OK, by later today we need to each come up with a couple of possibilities. We’ve got to make sure wherever it is … --- LOCATION: Hogwarts – balcony UMBRIDGE: (whispering to Filch) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – entry hallway FILCH: (bang, bang) (hanging decree) UMBRIGE: (from decree) All student organizations are henceforth disbanded. Any student… -- LOCATION: Hogwarts, near Room of Requirement GOYLE: Which way you going, Longbottom? Heh, heh… (Room of Requirement opens for Neville) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – the Room of Requirement HERMIONE: You’ve done it, Neville. You’ve found the Room of Requirement. RON: The what? HERMIONE: Also known as the Come and Go Room. The Room of Requirement only appears when a person has need of it, and it addresses the need… RON: So, say you really needed a toilet… HERMIONE: Charming, Ronald, but yes. That is the general idea. HARRY: It’s brilliant. It’s like Hogwarts wants us to fight back. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – the Room of Requirement – later NEVILLE: Expelliarmus! …I’m hopeless. HARRY: You’re- you’re just flourishing your wand too much. Try it like this: Expelliarmus! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – DADA classroom UMBRIDGE: You will please copy the approved text four times to ensure maximum retention. There will be no need for wands… HERMIONE: No need to think, more like it. UMBRIDGE: Wands away! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – the Room of Requirement HARRY: Stunning is one of the most useful spells in your arsenal. It’s sort of a wizard’s bread and butter, really. So um, come on, then Nigel. Give me your best shot. NIGEL: Stupefy! HARRY: Good… not bad! RON: Don’t worry, I’ll go easy on you. HERMIONE: Thanks, Ron. BOYS: Come on, Ron. Come on, Ron. Come on, Ron. HERMIONE: Stupefy! RON: StuRON: I let her do that. It’s good manners, isn’t it? Did it…intentionally. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – entry hallway FILCH: (bang) (hanging decree) UMBRIDGE: Come on, come up here…(questioning students) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – the Room of Requirement ?NEVILLE: Expelliarmus! HARRY: Just keep your concentration…right, a little higher. Nigel: Ahhh! It’s alright, I’m OK. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – entry hallway UMBRIDGE: (decree) students who wish to earn extra credit may apply at the High Inquisitor’s office… -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – the Room of Requirement HARRY: Working hard is important, but there’s something that matters even more: believing in yourself. ?: Expelliarmus! HARRY: Think of it this way. Every great wizard in history started out as nothing more than what we are now, students. If they could do it, why not us? ?: Levicorpus! ?: Stupefy! ?: Expelliarmus! ?: Expelliarmus! GINNY: Reducto! ?: Expelliarmus! NEVILLE: Expelliarmus! HARRY: Fantastic, Neville, well done. So, that’s it for this lesson. Now, we’re not going to be meeting again until after the holidays… DA: Ohh… HARRY: …so just keep practicing on your own as best you can, and- and well done, everyone. Great, great work! DA: (clapping) RON: Well done, mate. HARRY: Thanks. HERMIONE: See you in the common room, Harry. ?: Thanks a lot, Harry. HARRY: Merry Christmas… Merry Christmas… Thank you…Merry Christmas… have a Merry Christmas, Luna… FRED: We’ve been thinking, Harry, we can always slip Umbridge some Puking Pastilles into her tea… GEORGE: Or Fever Fudge; they give you these massive, puss-filled boils… HARRY: That sounds great, guys, would you excuse me? HARRY: Are you alright? I heard Umbridge gave you a rough time the other day. CHO: Yeah, I’m OK. Anyway, it’s worth it. It’s just- just learning all this, makes me wonder, well, if he’d known it… HARRY: Cedric – Cedric did know this stuff. He was really good. It’s just, Voldemort was better. CHO: You’re a really good teacher, Harry. I’ve never been able to stun anything before… Mistletoe… HARRY: It’s probably full of Nargles, though. CHO: What are Nargles? HARRY: No idea. (kisses her) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room RON: Well, how was it? HARRY: Wet. Only, she was sort of crying. RON: That bad at it, eh? HERMIONE: I’m sure Harry’s kissing was more than satisfactory. Cho spends half of her time crying these days. RON: You’d think a bit of snogging would cheer her up. HERMIONE: Don’t you understand how she must be feeling? Well….obviously she’s feeling sad about Cedric, and therefore confused about liking Harry, and guilty about kissing him, conflicted because Fudge is threatening to sack her mom from her job at the Ministry, and frightened that she won’t do well on her O.W.L.s because she’s so worried about everything else. RON: One person couldn’t feel all that, they’d explode. HERMIONE: Just because you’ve got the emotional range of a teaspoon… HARRY: Ha… HERMIONE: Ha, ha…ha, ha, ha… - LOCATION: Harry’s dreams – Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place SIRIUS: Voldemort may be after something…something he didn’t have the first time. -- LOCATION: Harry’s dreams – Ministry of Magic – Hall of Prophecies (Arthur Weasley being attacked by giant snake) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor boys’ dormitory -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dumbledore’s office DUMBLEDORE: In the dream, were you standing next to the victim, or looking down at the scene ? HARRY: Neither, I- I- it was like I – I-….Professor, will you please just tell me what’s happening… DUMBLEDORE: Everard, Arthur was on guard duty tonight, make sure he’s found by the right people. HARRY: Sir… DUMBLEDORE: Phineas, you must go to your portrait at Grimmauld Place and tell them that Arthur Weasley is gravely injured, and his children would be arriving there soon by Portkey. ?: We got him, Albus. It was close, but I think he’ll make it. What’s more, the Dark Lord failed to acquire it. DUMBLEDORE: Oh, thank heavens… HARRY: Look at me! What’s happening to me? SNAPE: You wished to see me, Headmaster? DUMBLEDORE: Severus, I afraid we can’t wait, not even until the morning. Otherwise, we will be vulnerable. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – spiral staircase -- LOCATION: Hogwarts - Snape’s office SNAPE: It appears that there is a connection between the Dark Lord’s mind and your own. Whether he is aware of the connection is for the moment unclear. Pray he remains ignorant. HARRY: You mean, if he knows about it then he’ll be able to read my mind. SNAPE: Read it. Control it. Unhinge it. In the past it was often the Dark Lord’s pleasure to invade the minds of his victims, creating visions designed to torture them into madness. Only after extracting the last exquisite ounce of agony, only after he had them literally begging for death, would he finally… kill them. Used properly, the power of Occulomency will help shield you from access or influence. In these lessons, I will attempt to penetrate your mind, you will attempt to resist. Prepare yourself!... Legilimens! -- LOCATION: Harry’s memories -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Snape’s office SNAPE: Concentrate, Potter. Focus! -- LOCATION: Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place – kitchen – Christmas morning MRS. WEASLEY: Here we go… Daddy’s back! WEASLEYS: (clapping) MRS. WEASLEY: Sit down everybody, sit down…that’s it, now here you go… FRED: And a nice big box for Ron… MRS. WEASLEY: The big box boy… Come on, open up – I want to see your faces. HERMIONE: Just what he wanted, actually. MRS. WEASLEY: OK, everyone, let’s clear this away…Oh, Harry, Harry – there you are. Happy Christmas! Good to have you with us! HARRY: Thank you. ARTHUR: A Christmas toast – to Mr. Harry Potter, without whom I would not be here. Harry! WEASLEYS: Harry! SIRIUS: Harry! -- LOCATION: Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place - stairs HERMIONE: I can’t understand why you didn’t want to wear it, Ronald. RON: ‘Cause I look like a bloody idiot, that’s why! KREACHER: Nasty brat, standing there as bold as brass…Harry Potter, the boy who stopped the Dark Lord…friend of Mudbloods and blood-traitors alike…if my poor mistress… SIRIUS: Kreacher! That’s enough of your bile. Away with you! KREACHER: Of course, Master. Kreacher lives to serve the Noble House of Black. SIRIUS: Sorry about that. He never was very pleasant, even when I was a boy. Not to me, anyway. HARRY: Wha- what, you- you grew up here? SIRIUS: This is my parents’ house. I offered it to Dumbledore as headquarters for the Order- about the only useful thing I’ve been able to do. This is the Black family tree… my deranged cousin… I hated the lot of them: my parents, with their pure-blood mania. My mother did that after I ran away. Charming woman. I was sixteen. HARRY: Where did you go? SIRIUS: To your dad’s. I was always welcome at the Potter’s. I see him so much in you, Harry. You are so very much alike. HARRY: I’m not so sure. Sirius, when I was… when I saw Mr. Weasley attacked, I wasn’t just watching. I was the snake. And afterwards, in Dumbledore’s office, there was a moment when I – I wanted to – to… this connection between me and Voldemort, what if the reason for it is because I am becoming more like him? I- I just feel so angry, all the time, and what if, after everything that I’ve been through, something’s gone wrong inside me? What is I’m becoming bad? SIRIUS: I want you to listen to me very carefully, Harry. You’re not a bad person. You’re a very good person who bad things have happened to. I understand. The- the world isn’t split into good people and Death Eaters. We’ve all got both light and dark inside of us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That’s who we really are. HERMIONE: (knock, knock, knock) Harry, time to go. SIRIUS: When all of this is over, we’ll be a proper family. You’ll see. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – exterior – entrance -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – stairs CHO: Harry! HERMIONE: Harry, Hagrid’s back! HARRY: I’m sorry… -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut – exterior -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut - interior UMBRIDGE: I’ll tell you one last time. I’m ordering you to tell me where you have been. HAGRID: I told you, I’ve been away for me health. UMBRIDGE: Your health? HAGRID: Bit ‘o fresh air, yeh know. UMBRIDGE: Oh yes. As gamekeeper fresh air must be difficult to come by. If I were you, I shouldn’t get too used to being back. In fact, mightn’t bother unpacking at all. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut – exterior -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Hagrid’s hut - interior HAGRID: This is top secret, right? Dumbledore sent me to parley with the giants. HERMIONE: Giants? HAGRID: Shhh. HERMIONE: You found them? HAGRID: Well, they’re not that hard to find, to be perfectly honest. They’re big, see. I tried to convince ‘em to join the cause. But I wasn’t the only one who was trying to win them over. RON: Death Eaters? HAGRID: Yeah, tryin’ to persuade ‘em to join You-Know-Who. HARRY: And, did they? HAGRID: I gave ’em Dumbledore’s message. S’pose some of them remember he was friendly to ’em… I suppose… HARRY: And, they did this to you? HAGRID: Not exactly, no… FANG: (bark, bark) HAGRID: Oh, go on, have it then, ya dozy dog. FANG: (bark, bark…bark) HAGRID: It’s changin’ out there. Just like last time. There’s a storm comin’, Harry, and we’d all best be ready when she does. -- LOCATION: Azkaban – stormy night BELLATRIX: Ah – ha-ha-ha-ha! -- LOCATION: Daily Prophet CORNELIUS FUDGE: (from Daily Prophet) we have confirmed there’s been a high-security breakout in the early hours of yesterday evening, and of course the Muggle Prime Minister has been alerted to this danger. We strongly suspect that this breakout was engineered by a man with personal experience with escaping from Azkaban, notorious, massmurderer, Sirius Black, a cousin of escapee Bellatrix Lestrange. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor common room HERMIONE: Dumbledore warned Fudge this could happen. He’s going to get us all killed if he can’t face the truth… SEAMUS: Harry… I ah, I wanted to apologize. Me mum says that the Prophet thing is all done up… so what I’m really trying to say is that, I believe you. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Room of Requirement HARRY: Neville…. NEVILLE: Fourteen years ago a Death Eater named Bellatrix Lestrange used the Cruciatus Curse on my parents. She tortured them for information, but they never gave in. I’m quite proud to be their son, but I’m not sure I’m ready for everyone to know just yet. HARRY: We’re going to make them proud, Neville. That’s a promise. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Room of Requirement HARRY: Make it a powerful memory. The happiest you’ve ever been, and allow it to fill you up. Keep trying, Seamus. ?: Expecto Patronum! HARRY: A full-bodied Patronus is the most difficult to produce, but the shield form can be equally effective at protecting from a variety of opponents….Fantastic! Remember, the Patronus will only be effective as long as you stay focused… Luna… Think of the happiest thing that you can… Good! …this is really advanced stuff, guys, you’re doing really well…. (Boom, boom, boom…boom- crash) UMBRIDGE: I’ll make short work of it…he, he…. (BLAST) UMBRIDGE: Get them! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Professor Dumbledore’s office UMBRIDGE: I’ve been watching them for weeks, and see…“Dumbledore’s Army!” Proof of what I have been telling you right from the beginning! Oh, yes. All your mutterings about You-Know-Who coming back didn’t fool us for a minute. We saw your lies for what they were: a smoke screen for your bid to seize control of the Ministry. DUMBLEDORE: Naturally. HARRY: No, Professor! He had nothing to do with it. It was me. DUMBLEDORE: Most noble of you, Harry, to shield me. But as it has been pointed out, the parchment clearly says “Dumbledore’s Army,” not “Potter’s”. I instructed Harry to form this organization, and I, and I alone, are responsible for it’s activities. CORNELIUS FUDGE: Dispatch an owl to the Daily Prophet. If we hurry we can still make the morning edition. Deloris, Shacklebolt, you will escort Dumbledore to Azkaban to await trial for conspiracy and sedition. DUMBLEDORE: Ahh… I thought we might hit this little snag. You seem to be laboring under the delusion that I’m going to- what was the phrase? “Come quietly.” Well, I can tell you this, I have no intention of going to Azkaban. UMBRIDGE: Take him! DUMBLEDORE: Fawkes! FAWKES: (Swoosh)(Poof) SHACKLEBOLT: Whoa! Well, you may not like it, Minister, but you can ’t deny Dumbledore’s got style. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – entry hall FILCH: (bang, bang) hanging decree UMBRIDGE: (decrees) Boys and girls are not to be within eight inches of each other… Those wishing to join the Inquisitorial Squad for extra credit should sign up… -- LOCTION: Hogwarts – Detention Hall (Detention for DA) (Moans) -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – hallway outside Detention Hall CHO: Harry… -- RON:…that old hag HERMIONE: Harry, even Dumbledore didn’t see it coming. It’s not your fault. RON: Yeah, we talked you into it. HARRY: Yeah, but I agreed. I’ve worked so hard to help, and all it’s done is to make things worse. But it doesn’t really matter anymore, ‘cause I don’t want to play anymore, ‘cause all it does it make you want to care too much, and the more you care the more you have to lose. Maybe it’s just better to… HERMIONE: to what? HARRY: To go it alone… Hagrid. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dark Forest RON: What’d you want to do? Where is he taking us? HARRY: Hagrid, why can’t you tell us? HAGRID: I’ve never seen the centaurs so riled up, and they’re dangerous at the best of times. The Ministry restricts their territory much more, and they’re going to have a full uprising on their hands. HERMIONE: Hagrid, what’s going on? HAGRID: Sorry to be so mysterious, you three, I- I wouldn’t be bothering you with it at all with it, but… with Dumbledore gone, I’ll likely be getting’ the sack any day now. And I just couldn’t leave without telling someone about ‘im… Grawpy… Down here, yeh great buffoon. HAGRID: Grawpy! I brought you some company. I couldn’t just leave him because, because he’s my brother! RON: Blimey! HAGRID: Well, half-brother, really… but he’s completely harmless, just like I said. A little high-spirited, is all… HERMIONE: Ahh! HAGRID: Grawpy, that is not polite! RON: Do something! HAGRID: Grawpy, you do not grab, do you? That’s your new friend, Hermione. Grawpy! RON: Umph! HERMIONE: Grawp! Put…me…down……now! RON: You alright? HERMIONE: Fine. He just needs a firm hand, is all. HARRY: I think you’ve got an admirer. RON: You just stay away from her, alright? (ding) (ding) HAGRID: He gets his own food and all. (ding) It’s company he’ll be needin’, is all. (ding) You will look after ‘im, won’t you? I’m the only family he’s got. (ding) -- LOCATION: Harry’s memories SNAPE: Feeling sentimental? -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Snape’s office HARRY: That’s private! SNAPE: Not to me. And not to the Dark Lord if you don’t improve. Every memory he has access to is a weapon he can use against you, and you won’t last two seconds if he invades your mind. You’re just like your father. Lazy, arrogant – HARRY: Don’t say a word against my father! SNAPE: Weak… HARRY: I’m not weak! SNAPE: Then prove it! Control your emotions. Discipline your mind. Legilimens! -- LOCATION: Harry’s memories -- HARRY: Stop it! SNAPE: Is this what you call control? HARRY: We’ve been at it for hours. If I could just rest! SNAPE: The Dark Lord isn’t resting. You and Black are two of a kind. Sentimental children forever whining about how bitterly unfair your lives have been. Well, it may have escaped your notice, but life isn’t fair. Your blessed father knew that, in fact he frequently saw to it… HARRY: My father was a great man. SNAPE: Your father was a swine! HARRY: Protego! SNAPE: Legili- -- LOCATION: Snape’s memories JAMES: Come on Moony, Padfoot…Expelliarmus! CROWD: Snivellus, Snivellus, Snivellus… JAMES: Who wants to see me take off his pants… SNAPE: Enough! -- SNAPE: Enough! Your lessons are at an end. HARRY: I didn’tSNAPE: Get…out. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor NIGEL: (Sniff) Fred: What’s your name? NIGEL: Nigel. GEORGE: It’s not as bad as you think, see. It’s fading already, you can hardly see our anymore. And the pain stops after awhile, and… UMBRIDGE: He, he… As I told you once before, Mr. Potter, naughty children deserve to be punished. FRED: You know, George, I’ve always felt our futures lie outside the world of academic achievement. GEORGE: Fred, I’ve been thinking exactly the same thing. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – classroom – O.W.L. tests (bang, boom, bang, boom…) (Umbridge open’s door) (Fred and George’s fireworks and escape) FRED AND GEORGE: Whoo! FRED: Ready when you are! --- LOCATION: Hogwarts – outside entrance STUDENTS: Yeah! Woo! Yahoo! HARRY: Oh… --- LOCATION: Harry’s mind – Ministry of Magic – Hall of Prophecies VOLDEMORT: I need that prophecy… SIRIUS: You’ll have to kill me. VOLDEMORT: Oh I will, but first you will fetch it for me… Crucio! SIRIUS: Ahhh! Ahhh! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – moving staircases HARRY: It’s Sirius! HERMIONE: Are you sure you saw it? HARRY: It was just like with Mr. Weasley. It was the same place I’ve been seeing for months, only I couldn’t remember where I’d seen it before. Sirius said Voldemort was after something, something he didn’t have the last time. And it’s in the Department of Mysteries. HERMIONE: Listen Harry. What if Voldemort meant for you to see this. What if he’s just trying to get to you? HARRY: What if he is? I’m just supposed to let him die? Hermione, he’s the only family I’ve got left. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor HARRY: We’ll have to use the floo network. HERMIONE: The Ministry’s got them under surveillance. HARRY: Not all of them. HARRY: Alohomora! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Umbridge’s office HARRY: Alert the Order if you can. RON: Are you mental? We’re going with you! HARRY: It’s too dangerous! HERMIONE: Why can’t you get it into your head, we’re in this together? UMBRIDGE: That you are! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Umbridge’s office - later DRACO: I caught this one trying to help the Weasley girl… UMBRIDGE: You were going to Dumbledore, weren’t you? HARRY: No. UMBRIDGE: (slap) SNAPE: You sent for me, Headmistress? UMBRIDGE: Snape, yes. The time has come for answers, whether they want to give them to me or not. Have you got the Veritaserum? SNAPE: I’m afraid you’ve used up all of my stores interrogating students, the last of it on Miss Chang. Unless you wish to poison him- and then I assure you, I would have the greatest sympathy if you did- I cannot help you. HARRY: He’s got Padfoot. He- he’s got Padfoot at the place where it’s hidden! UMBRIDGE: Padfoot? What is Padfoot? Where what is hidden? What is he talking about, Snape? SNAPE: I’ve no idea. UMBRIDGE: Very well, you give me no choice, Potter. As this is an issue of Ministry security, you leave me with…no alternative. The Cruciatus Curse ought to loosen your tongue. HERMIONE: But it’s illegal! UMBRIDGE: What Cornelius doesn’t know, won’t hurt him. HERMIONE: Tell her, Harry! UMBRIDGE: Tell me what? HERMIONE: Well, if you won’t tell her where it is, I will. UMBRIDGE: Where what is? HERMIONE: Dumbledore’s secret weapon. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – the Dark Forest UMBRIDGE: Is it very far in? HERMIONE: It had to be somewhere that students wouldn’t find it accidentally. HARRY: (whispering) What are you doing? HERMIONE: (whispering) Improvising. UMBRIDGE: Well, where is this weapon? There isn’t one, is there? You were trying to trick me. You know, I really hate children… You have no business here, centaur. This is a Ministry matter. Lower your weapons! I warn you, under the law of creatures of near-human intelligence… How dare you, filthy half-breeds! Enough! Incarcerous! CENTAUR: Arhhh! HERMIONE: Please! Please, stop it! Please! UMBRIDGE: Now enough! I will…have…order! Ahhh! HERMIONE: Grawp! UMBRIDGE: You filthy animal! Ah! Put me down! UMBRIDGE: Potter, do something! Tell them I mean no harm! HARRY: I’m sorry, Professor. I must not tell lies. UMBRIDGE: I am Senior Undersecretary Deloris Jane Umbridge! Let me goooooo! HERMIONE: Thank you, Grawp. HARRY: Hermione. Hermione, Sirius! -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – grounds, bridge HERMIONE: How’d you get away? GINNY: Puking Pastilles. It wasn’t pretty. RON: Told them I was hungry, and wanted some sweets. Of course they buggered off and ate the whole lot themselves. HERMIONE: Very clever, Ron. RON: It’s been known to happen. NEVILLE: It was brilliant! So, how’re we getting to London? HARRY: Look, it’s not that I don’t appreciate everything that you’ve done, all of you, but- but I’ve got you into enough trouble as it is. NEVILLE: Dumbledore’s Army was supposed to be about doing something real, or was that all just words to you? RON: Maybe you don’t have to do this all by yourself, mate. HARRY: So, how are we going to get to London? LUNA: We fly, of course. -- LOCATION: Flying on thestrals over Britain -- LOCATION: Ministry of Magic – entry hall -- LOCATION: Ministry of Magic – Department of Mysteries ELEVATOR SPEAKER: Department of Mysteries HARRY: This is it. -- LOCATION: Ministry of Magic – Hall of Prophecies HARRY: Ninety-two, Ninety-three, Ninety-four… Ninety-five. He should be here. NEVILLE: Harry, it’s got your name on it. TRELAWNEY: (in Prophecy) “The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches, and the Dark Lord shall mark him as his equal, but he will have a power the Dark Lord knows not. Either must die at the hand of the other, for neither can live while the other survives…” HERMIONE: Harry! HARRY: Where’s Sirius? LUCIUS MALFOY: You know, you really should learn the difference between dreams… and reality. You saw only what the Dark Lord wanted you to see. Now hand me the Prophecy. HARRY: If you do anything to them and I’ll break it. BELLATIX: Ah, ha, ha, ha, he knows how to play! Itty, bitty baby Potter! NEVILLE: Bellatrix Lestrange! BELLATRIX: Neville Longbottom, is it, how are your parents? NEVILLE: Fine now they’re about to be avenged! LUCIUS MALFOY: Let’s everybody just… calm down, shall we? All we want is that Prophecy. HARRY: Why does Voldemort need me to get it? BELLATRIX: You filthy Half-blood! LUCIUS MALFOY: Now, Bellatrix, he’s just curious. Prophecies can only be retrieved by those about whom they are made, which is lucky for you, Harry. Haven’t you always wondered what was the reason for the connection between you and the Dark Lord? Why he was unable to kill you when you were just an infant? Don’t you want to know the secret of your scar? All the answers are there, Potter. All you have to do is give it to me. I can show you everything. HARRY: I’ve waited fourteen years… LUCIUS MALFOY: I know… HARRY: I guess it can wait a bit longer…Now! DA: Stupefy! Expelliarmus! ?: Levicorpus! NEVILLE: Petrificus Totalis! LUNA: Well done, Neville. HARRY: Stupefy! HERMIONE: Stupefy! GINNY: Reducto! (Tinkle…tinkle!!) HARRY: Get back to the door! (Crash…crash…crash!) -- LOCATION: Ministry of Magic – outside Hall of Prophecies – drop-off to room with the Veil RON: Department of Mysteries – got that bit right, didn’t they? HARRY: The voices… can you tell what they’re saying? HERMIONE: There aren’t any voices, Harry. Now let’s get out of here. LUNA: I hear them, too. HERMIONE: Harry, it’s just an empty archway… please Harry. HARRY: Get behind me! (whoosh!) LUCIUS MALFOY: Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh…Did you actually believe, or were you truly naive enough to think, that children stood a chance against us? I’ll make this… simple for you, Potter. Give me the Prophecy now, or watch your friends… die. NEVILLE: Don’t give it to him, Harry! (whoosh) SIRIUS: Get away from my godson. (dueling) (prophecy breaks) HARRY: Sirius! SIRIUS: Harry, I want you to take the others and get out of here. HARRY: What, no! I want to stay with you! SIRIUS: You’ve done beautifully, Harry; let me take it from here… SIRIUS: Nice one, James! BELLATRIX: Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! SIRIUS: Ah! (falls through the veil) -- LOCATION: Ministry of Magic – Floo Network Hall or Entry Hall BELLATRIX: I killed Sirius Black! Ha, ha, ha, ha! Come and get me! HARRY: Crucio! BELLATRIX: Whoa! Oh… VOLDEMORT: (voice) You’ve got to mean it, Harry. She killed him. She deserves it…You know the spell, Harry. BELLATRIX: Heh, heh, heh, heh…Do it! VOLDEMORT: So…weak. (whoosh) DUMBLEDORE: It was foolish of you to come here tonight, Tom. The Aurors are on their way. VOLDEMORT: By which time I shall be gone, and you… you’ll be dead. (dueling) VOLDEMORT: Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha… VOLDEMORT: Rrahhh! VOLDEMORT (possessing Harry): Ahh…uh…You’ve lost, old man. HARRY: Ahh! Uh! DUMBLEDORE: Harry… VOLDEMORT (possessing Harry): So weak, so vulnerable… look at me… DUMBLEDORE: Harry, it isn’t how you are alike, it’s how you’re different… HARRY: Ah! Ugh!... DUMBLEDORE: Harry… HARRY: You’re the weak one. And you’ll never know love, or friendship, and I feel sorry for you. VOLDEMORT: You’re a fool, Harry Potter, and you will lose…everything. CORNELIUS FUDGE: He’s back! -- LOCATION: Daily Prophets -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Gryffindor Boys’ dormitory -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – Dumbledore’s office DUMBLEDORE: I know how you feel, Harry. HARRY: No you don’t… It’s my fault. DUMBLEDORE: No, the fault is mine. I knew it was only a matter of time before Voldemort made the connection between you. I thought that by distancing myself from you, as I have done all year, he’d be less tempted, and therefore you might be more protected. HARRY: The Prophecy said, “Neither one can live while the other one survives.” That means one of us is going to have to kill the other, yes? DUMBLEDORE: Yes. HARRY: Why didn’t you tell me? DUMBLEDORE: For the same reason you tried to save Sirius. The same reason your friends saved you. After all these years, after all you’ve suffered, I didn’t want to cause you anymore pain. I cared too much about you. -- LOCATION: Hogwarts – corridor HARRY: How come you’re not at the feast? LUNA: I’ve lost most of my possessions. All year people have been hiding them. HARRY: That’s awful. LUNA: Oh, it was all in good fun, but as it’s the last night, I really do need them back. HARRY: Do you want any help finding them? LUNA: I’m sorry about your godfather, Harry. HARRY: Are you sure you don’t want any help looking? LUNA: That’s alright. Anyway, my mother always said things we lose have a way of coming back to us in the end… just not always in the way we expect. I think I’ll go have some pudding. -- LOCATION: Path from Hogwarts to Hogsmeade Station HARRY: I’ve been thinking about something Dumbledore said to me. HERMIONE: What’s that? HARRY: That even though we have a fight on our hands, we’ve got one thing that Voldemort doesn’t have. RON: Yeah? HARRY: Something worth fighting for. --- END CREDITS

== oh no BILBO ==

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey ­ Movie Transcript Warner Bros. Pictures ­ Logo New Line Cinema ­ Logo Metro­Goldwyn Mayer ­ Logo New Line Cinema and Metro­Goldwyn Mayer Pictures present A Wingnut Films production The Hobbit [The scene starts off black.] [Bilbo:] “My dear Frodo.” [Bilbo lights a match, then uses it to light a candle. He walks through a hallway in Bag End, carrying the candle.] [Bilbo:] “You asked me one once if I had told you everything there was to know about my adventures. And while I can honestly say I have told you the truth, I may not have told you all of it.” [Bilbo opens a chest. He glances with fascination and recollection at Sting, his sword in its sheath, and reaches out to touch it. At the last second, he hurriedly restrains himself and pulls out a large red book from the chest instead. Sitting down at his desk and opening the book, he sees a drawing of his younger self. He picks up the picture and gazes at it.] [Bilbo:] “I am old now, Frodo. I’m not the same Hobbit I once was.” [Bilbo dips his quill in a pot of ink, and poises to write in the book. He begins writing.] [Bilbo:] “I think it is time for you to know what really happened. It began long ago in a land far away to the east, the like of which you will not find in the world today.” 1[The camera fades away from Bilbo in his study and begins panning over a map of Middle­earth. We see a city, Dale, full of humans and dwarves walking happily through markets and bazaars.] [Bilbo:] “There was the city of Dale. Its markets known far and wide, full of the bounties of vine and vale. Peaceful, and prosperous. For this city lay before the doors of the greatest kingdom in Middle­earth: Erebor. Stronghold of Thror, King under the Mountain, mightiest of the dwarf lords.” [The camera swoops over the city of Dale and reveals an enormous mountain just behind the city; a massive gateway has been built into the side of the mountain, flanked by humongous stone statues of dwarfs. We see Thror and his son Thrain inside the castle, looking out of the battlements and observing their domains. The camera pans through the city of Erebor, seeing vast chambers and massive, carved statues. Thror sits on his throne as his son, Thrain approaches him; his grandson, Thorin, stands at his right side.] [Bilbo:] “Thror ruled with utter surety, never doubting his house would endure, for his line lay secure in the lives of his son and grandson. Ahhh, Frodo, Erebor; built deep within the mountain itself, the beauty of this fortress city was legend.” [The camera pans over the vast gold quarries within Erebor; dwarves with magnifying lenses sift through piles of rare jewels; smiths pound metal with mallets. A dwarf quarrying for gold sees a glow in the rock; he peels away the rock and finds a beautiful, glowing gem, the Arkenstone.] [Bilbo:] “Its wealth lay in the earth, in precious gems hewed from rock, and in great seams of gold, running like rivers through stone. The skill of the dwarves was unequaled, fashioning objects of great beauty out of diamond, emerald, ruby, and sapphire. Ever they delved deeper, down into the dark. And that is where they found it. The heart of the mountain. The Arkenstone. Thror named it the King’s Jewel. He took it as a sign, a sign that his his right to rule was divine. All would pay homage to him, even the great Elvenking, Thranduil.” [The Arkenstone has been placed in a special pedestal on Thror’s throne; as he sits on his throne, flanked by his son, grandson, and other officers, Thranduil and his aides approach.] [Bilbo:] “But the years of peace and plenty were not to last. Slowly, the days turned sour, and the watchful nights closed in. Thror’s love of gold had grown too fierce. A sickness had begun to grow within him; it was a sickness of the mind. And where sickness thrives, bad things will follow.” [A shadow begins to cover the massive gates of Erebor. Thror walks through his massive rooms full of treasure, looking consumed with greed. Thorin watches him from a distance, then slowly retreats into a shadow.] [Some time later, a paper dragon kite is being flown over Dale, along with other childrens’ kites. Suddenly, a great wind comes, blowing the trees on the mountainside until the bend and creak. Thorin and Balin, a fellow dwarf, rush to the battlements and look for any sign of danger.] [Bilbo:] “The first they heard was a noise like a hurricane coming down from the north. The pines on the mountain creaked and cracked in a hot, dry wind.” 2[Thorin:] “Balin, sound the alarm. Call out the guard. Do it now!” [Balin:] “What is it?” [Thorin, looking worried, yells to everyone in the halls.] [Thorin:] “Dragon. Dragon!!!” [A roar sounds, and torrents of fire rain all over Erebor; Thorin pulls Balin behind a pillar just in time to save him from being burned.] [Bilbo:] “It was a fire drake from the north. Smaug had come.” [The kites from earlier are suddenly burned away. The people in the town of Dale scream in fear and panic as Smaug destroys their city, setting fire to many buildings and demolishing others. We only see slight glimpses of Smaug as he swoops about, breathing fire and destroying buildings by smashing into them. A little girl cries as she watches her doll burn in the street.] [Bilbo:] “Such wanton death was dealt that day, for this city of men was nothing to Smaug; his eye was set on another prize. For dragons covet gold, with a dark and fierce desire.” [Thorin and Thror, along with many other Dwarf soldiers, wait with weapons ready behind the gates of Erebor.] [Thorin:] “Stand firm!” [Fire bursts through cracks in the gates as Smaug tries to smash his way in. Smaug soon breaks through the gate of Erebor and starts killing dwarves left and right, trampling them and burning them. Thorin is nearly stepped on by the dragon, but he escapes. Thror fearfully runs to his throne and detaches the Arkenstone, running away with it. As he runs through a doorway, he sees Smaug in front of him; tripping, he drops the Arkenstone, and it rolls into a massive pile of gold.] [Thror:] “No!” [Thorin appears and drags him away.] [Bilbo:] “Erebor was lost, for a dragon will guard his plunder as long as he lives.” [As the dwarves run away from Erebor, they see King Thranduil and his elves approaching the mountain. Thorin and the others scream to the Elves to help them, but Thranduil, astride his deer, turns away.] [Thorin:] “Run for your lives! Help us!” [Bilbo:] “Thranduil would not risk the lives of his kin against the wrath of the dragon. No help came from the elves that day, or any day since.” [Thorin glares in anger at the retreating elves. The remnants of the Dwarf kingdom slowly journey across vast, swampy lands. Thorin, at the front, stands on a mountaintop as his people come to him.] 3[Bilbo:] “Robbed of their homeland, the dwarves of Erebor wandered the wilderness, a once mighty people brought low.” [Thorin works in a city of men as a smith; he pounds a sword with his mallet with increasing ferocity and anger] [Bilbo:] “The young dwarf prince took work where he could find it, laboring in the villages of men, but always he remembered the mountain smoke beneath the moon, the trees like torches blazing bright, for he had seen dragon fire in the sky, and his city turned to ash, and never forgave, and he never forgot.” [The scene fades to Bag End in Hobbiton, where we met Bilbo earlier. Bilbo is in his study, writing in his book.] [Bilbo:] “That, my dear Frodo, is where I come in. For quite by chance, and the will of a Wizard, fate decided I would become part of this tale. It began, well, it began as you might expect. In a hole in the ground, there lived a Hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, full of worms and oozy smells; this was a Hobbit­hole, and that means good food, a warm hearth, and all the comforts of home.” [Frodo, eating an apple, walks out of Bag End and picks up the mail from the mailbox. He returns inside and gives the mail to Bilbo. Bilbo, who was laughing while writing in his book, quickly quiets down as Frodo approaches him.] [Bilbo:] “Thank you.” [Frodo picks up the picture of a young Bilbo.] [Frodo:] “What’s this?” [Bilbo grabs back the picture.] [Bilbo:] “That is private. Keep your sticky paws off. It’s not ready yet.” [Frodo:] “Not ready for what?” [Bilbo:] “Reading.” [Frodo picks up and examines some old object of Bilbo’s. Bilbo examines the pile of letters] [Bilbo:] “What on earth are these?” [Frodo:] “Replies to the party invitations.” [Bilbo:] “Oh! Good gracious! Is it today?” [Frodo:] “They all said they’re coming. Except for the Sackville­Bagginses; they’re demanding you ask them in person.” 4[Bilbo:] “Are they, indeed? Over my dead body.” [Frodo:] “They’d probably find that quite agreeable! They seem to think you have tunnels overflowing with gold.” [Bilbo:] “It was one small chest, hardly overflowing. And it still smells of troll.” [Bilbo starts hiding his valuables in chests, jars, vases, and other inconspicuous places.] [Frodo:] “What on earth are you doing?” [Bilbo:] “Taking precautions. You know, I caught her making off with the silverware once.” [Frodo:] “Who?” [Bilbo:] “Lobelia Sackville­Baggins. She had all my spoons stuffed in her pockets. Hah! Dreadful woman; make sure you keep an eye on her after I’m ... when I’m ... when I’m...” [Frodo:] “When you’re...what?” [Bilbo:] “It’s nothing. Nothing.” [Bilbo looks at some papers on a table.] [Frodo:] “You know, some people are beginning to wonder about you, Uncle. They think you’re becoming odd.” [Bilbo:] “Odd? Hmm.” [Frodo:] “Unsociable.” [Bilbo:] “Unsociable? Me? Nonsense. Be a good lad and put that on the gate.” [Bilbo hands Frodo a sign he’s made; Frodo looks at it dubiously.] [Going outside, Frodo nails the sign to the gate of Bag End. It says “NO ADMITTANCE EXCEPT ON PARTY BUSINESS.” Bilbo comes outside and stretches.] [Frodo:] “You think he’ll come?” [Bilbo:] “Who?” [Frodo:] “Gandalf.” [Bilbo:] “Ahhh. He wouldn’t miss a chance to lit up his whiz­poppers! He’ll give us quite a show, you’ll see.” [Frodo:] “Alright then, I’m off.” 5[Bilbo:] “Off to where?” [Frodo:] “East Farthing woods. I’m going to surprise him.” [Bilbo:] “Well, go on then! You don’t want to be late.” [As Frodo runs off, the camera pans over the Shire. Bilbo sits on a bench outside his door, smoking his pipe; he blows out a large smoke ring which floats into the sky.] [Bilbo:] “He doesn’t approve of being late. Not that I ever was. In those days, I was always on time. I was entirely respectable. And nothing unexpected ever happened.” AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY 60 years earlier... [Bilbo’s smoke ring collapses and becomes a smoke moth, as a tall figure walks into the shot. The moth flies into Bilbo’s face, waking him from his reverie. A younger Bilbo, from 60 years earlier, is sitting on the same bench, smoking his pipe. He looks up in surprise and sees a hooded figure.] [Bilbo:] “Good morning.” [Gandalf:] “What do you mean? Do you mean to wish me a good morning, or do you mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not? Or, perhaps you mean to say that you feel good on this particular morning. Or are you simply stating that this is a morning to be good on?” [Bilbo:] “All of them at once, I suppose.” [Gandalf looks slightly disapprovingly at Bilbo; Bilbo is confused and bewildered.] [Bilbo:] “Can I help you?” [Gandalf:] “That remains to be seen. I’m looking for someone to share in an adventure.” [Bilbo:] “An adventure? Now, I don’t imagine anyone west of Bree would have much interest in adventures. Nasty, disturbing, uncomfortable things. Make you late for dinner, hm, mm” [Bilbo gets up and checks his mailbox, grabbing some mail and sorting through it, clucking to himself. He looks quite uncomfortable because Gandalf is still standing there. Puffing his pipe in vexation, he begins heading back inside.] [Bilbo:] “Good morning.” [Gandalf:] “To think that I should have lived to be good­morninged by Belladonna Took’s son, as if I were selling buttons at the door.” 6[Bilbo:] “Beg your pardon?” [Gandalf:] “You’ve changed, and not entirely for the better, Bilbo Baggins.” [Bilbo:] “I’m sorry, do I know you?” [Gandalf:] “Well, you know my name, although you don’t remember I belong to it. I’m Gandalf! And Gandalf means … me.” [Bilbo:] “Gandalf...not Gandalf, the wandering Wizard, who made such excellent fireworks! Old Took used to have them on Midsummer’s Eve. Ha, ha! Well. Hmm, I had no idea you were still in business.” [Gandalf:] “And where else should I be?” [Bilbo:] “Ha, ha! Hm, hmm...” [Bilbo puffs confusedly on his pipe] [Gandalf:] “Well, I’m pleased to find your remember something about me, even if it’s only my fireworks. Well that’s decided. It will be very good for you, and most amusing for me. I shall inform the others.” [Bilbo:] “Inform the who? What? No. No. No! Wait. We do not want any adventures here, thank you. Not today, not­mm. I suggest you try over the Hill or across the Water. Good morning.” [Bilbo, in frustration, retreats into Bag End, gesturing at Gandalf with his pipe. Once inside, he bolts the door and leans against it. Hearing a curious noise, he puts his ear close to the door. The noise is from Gandalf drawing a glowing symbol on Bilbo’s door with his staff. Alarmed, Bilbo looks out his side window, only to find Gandalf’s eye appear in front of him. He jumps back in fright and hides behind a wall; he looks out another window and sees Gandalf hurrying away.] [It is nighttime. In Bag End, Bilbo prepares a dinner of fish; he settles down at his table, tucks a napkin in his collar, and begins sprinkling salt on his fish. Unbeknownst to him, the the symbol on the door glows, and the shadow of a person appears on the door. Bilbo, in the middle of squeezing lemon juice on his fish, looks up in surprise as the doorbell rings. He opens the door and finds a tall, bald dwarf on his doorstep. The dwarf greets him and bows slightly.] [Bilbo:] “Ah.” [Dwalin:] “Dwalin, at your service.” [Shellshocked, Bilbo lets out a noise like a whimper. Coming to his senses, he quickly ties his robe tighter and stands taller, although he is still confused.] [Bilbo:] “Bilbo Baggins, at yours.” 7[Dwalin walks inside without an invitation] [Bilbo:] “D­do we know each other?” [Dwalin:] “No. Which way, laddie? Is it down here?” [Bilbo:] “I­is what down where?” [Dwalin dumps some of his stuff on the ground and thrusts the rest onto Bilbo.] [Dwalin:] “Supper. He said there’d be food, and lots of it.” [Bilbo:] “H­He said? Who said?” [Dwalin sits at Bilbo’s spot on the kitchen table, eating Bilbo’s dinner, while Bilbo sits behind him, confused. Dwalin eats all the flesh from the fish, then eats the head as well, as Bilbo looks on in disgust.] [Dwalin:] “Mmmm. … Very good, this. Any more?” [Bilbo:] “What? Uh, oh, yes, yes [Dwalin:] “Ah.” [Bilbo:] “Help yourself.” [Bilbo brings over a plate of biscuits; he hurriedly hides one behind his back for himself. Dwalin begins stuffing them in his mouth.] [Bilbo:] “Mmmm. It’s just that, um, I wasn’t expecting company.” [The bell rings again, and Bilbo looks up in alarm.] [Dwalin:] “That’ll be the door.” [Bilbo opens the door and finds an old, white­haired dwarf waiting and bowing.] [Balin:] “Balin, at your service.” [Bilbo:] “Good evening.” [Balin:] “Yes, yes it is, though I think it might rain later. Am I late?” [Bilbo:] “Late for what?” [Balin sees Dwalin, who is trying to get more biscuits from Bilbo’s jar.] [Balin:] “Oh, ha ha! Evening, brother. Heh, heh.” 8[Dwalin:] “Oh, by my beard, you are shorter and wider than last we met.’ [Balin:] “Wider, not shorter. Sharp enough for both of us.” [Laughing, they greet each other amicably. Putting their arms on each other’s shoulders, they smash their foreheads together. Bilbo looks on in wonder.] [Bilbo:] “Uh, excuse me; sorry, I hate to interrupt, ah, but the thing is, I’m not entirely sure you’re in the right house.” [Ignoring Bilbo, Dwalin and Balin have gone into Bilbo’s pantry, where they are pouring ale and examining the food. As they talk to each other, Bilbo continues his speech.] [Dwalin:] “Have you eaten? [Bilbo:] “It’s not that I don’t like visitors; I­I like visitors as much as the next Hobbit, but I do like to know them before they come visiting.” [Dwalin and Balin, not listening to Bilbo, are still rifling through his pantry. ] [Balin:] “Ah, that looks very nice indeed.” [Dwalin:] [indistinguishable] [Balin picks up a lump of cheese.] [Dwalin:] “What’s this?” [Balin:] “I don’t know, [indistinguishable] cheese.” [Bilbo:] “The thing is, um­­” [Balin:] “It’s gone blue.” [Dwalin:] “It’s riddled with mold.” [Dwalin takes the cheese and tosses it out of the pantry, past the still­speaking Bilbo.] [Bilbo:] “The thing is, um, I, I don’t know either of you, not in the slightest. I don’t mean to be blunt, but I uh, but I had to speak my mind. I’m sorry.” [Balin:] [indistinguishable] [The two dwarves pause and look at Bilbo.] [Balin:] “Hm. Apology accepted. [Bilbo:] “Mm!” 9[Balin:] “Ah, now fill it up, brother, don’t stint. I could eat again, if you insist.” [Balin hands a tankard to Dwalin so that it can be filled with ale. In the background, the doorbell rings again.] [Bilbo opens it to find two young dwarves. Upon seeing them, Bilbo makes a small noise which sounds like a moan.] [Fili:] “Fili.” [Kili:] “And Kili.” [Fili and Kili, together:] “At your service.” [Kili:] “You must be Mr. Boggins.” [Bilbo:] “Nope, you can’t come in, you’ve come to the wrong house.” [Bilbo tries closing the door, but Kili stops it with his foot.] [Kili:] “What? Has it been cancelled?” [Fili:] “No one told us.” [Bilbo:] “Can­­? No­­nothing’s been cancelled.” [Kili:] “Well, that’s a relief.” [The dwarves push their way in and begin unloading their stuff onto Bilbo.] [Fili:] “Careful with these, I just had ‘em sharpened.” [Kili:] “It’s nice, this place. D’you you do it yourself?” [Kili scrapes the mud off his boots on the edge of a chest standing nearby.] [Bilbo:] “Ah, no, it’s been in the family for years. That’s my mother’s glory box, can you please not do that?!” [Dwalin:] “Fili, Kili, come on, give us a hand.” [Kili:] “Mister Dwalin.” [The dwarves laugh.] [Balin:] “Let’s shove this in the hallway, otherwise we’ll never get everyone in.” [The dwarves prepare to shift Bilbo’s furniture around to create a meeting/feasting place.] 10[Bilbo:] “Ev­­everyone? How many more are there?” [Fili or Kili:] “Where do you want this?” [The doorbell rings very hard and longer than before. Bilbo, in anger, walks quickly toward the door, dumping all the swords and other equipment in his arms along the way.] [Bilbo:] “Oh no. No, no! There’s nobody home. Go away, and bother somebody else. There’s far too many dwarves in my dining room as it is. If­ if­ If this is some clotterd’s idea of a joke, ha ha, I can only say, it is in very poor taste.” [Bilbo opens the door, and an entire heap of dwarves, eight to be exact, fall in. Struggling to get up, they grumble and yell at each other, saying “Get off!”. Gandalf is standing behind them.] [Bilbo:] “Gandalf.” [The entire group of dwarves, 12 of them, begins raiding Bilbo’s pantry and taking out all his food. He tries to tell them to put it back, but they ignore him.] [Bilbo:] “Those are my plates! Excuse me! Not my wine. Put that back. Put that back! Not the jam, please! ...Excuse me.” [Bombur walks out of the pantry with three entire wheels of cheese.] [Bilbo:] “Excuse me. A tad excessive, isn’t it? Have you got a cheese knife?” [Bofur:] “Cheese knife? He eats it by the block.” [Oin and Gloin walk through the hall carrying chairs from one of Bilbo’s rooms.] [Bilbo:] “No, no, that’s Grandpa Mungo's chair! No, I’m sorry, you’ll have to take it back please. Take it back...It’s antique, not for sitting on! Thank you! That’s a book, not a coaster. Put that map down, thank you.” [Oin:] “I cannot hear what you’re saying!” [The dwarves continue bringing all of Bilbo’s food and furniture into the dining room. Dori approaches Gandalf with a tray and some tea.] [Dori:] “Excuse me, Mr. Gandalf, can I tempt you with a nice cup of chamomile tea?” [Gandalf:] “Oh, no thank you, Dori. A little red wine for me, I think.” [Gandalf walks out of the dining room, trying to avoid the scurrying dwarves. He hits his head on the chandelier, then he begins counting the dwarves on his fingers.] [Gandalf:] “Fili, Kili, Oin, Gloin, Dwalin, Balin, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Dori, Nori...Ori.” 11[Bilbo wrestles a bowl of tomatoes away from Nori. Bifur, the dwarf with an axe in his head, approaches Gandalf and talks to him in Khuzdul (untranslated) and with body motions.] [Gandalf:] “Yes, you’re quite right, Bifur. We appear to be one dwarf short.” [Dwalin:] “He is late, is all. He travelled North to a meeting of our kin. He will come.” [Dori:] “Mr. Gandalf? [Gandalf:] “Hmmm?” [Dori:] “A little glass of red wine, as requested. It’s, eh, got a fruity bouquet.” [Gandalf:] “Ah, Cheers.” [Gandalf drinks the tiny cup of wine Dori offers him, then looks sadly at the cup, wanting a little more.] [Gandalf:] “Mm.” [The dwarves, sitting in Bilbo’s dining room, have a grand feast with all his food. They are quite rude and messy about it. Bofur throws some food to his brother, Bombur.] [Bofur:] “Bombur, catch!” [Bombur catches the food in his mouth, and everyone cheers. As everyone begins throwing food around, Bilbo walks away in disgust. He looks at his pantry in shock; it has been entirely cleared of food. Fili walks on top of the table, carrying several cups of ale and knocking aside the food in his way.] [Fili:] “Who wants an ale? There you go.” [Dwalin:] “Let him have another drink!” [Fili:] “Here you go.” [Dwalin pours his ale into Oin’s hearing trumpet, and as Oin splutters in anger, everyone else laughs. Oin puts his hearing trumpet to his mouth and blows the ale out of it, making it squeal. One of the dwarves yells, “On the count of three!” and the dwarves pound their tankards together. Someone counts, “One!...Two!” Then all the dwarves go quiet and begin drinking their ale together. They are incredibly messy, as ale falls all over their faces and runs down their beards. When finished drinking, they begin burping; the youngest, Ori, lets out the biggest burp. The dwarves laugh. Bilbo looks away in disgust.] [When the meal finishes, the dwarves leave the table and begin walking about. Bilbo grabs a doily back from Nori.] [Bilbo:] “Excuse me, that is a doily, not a dishcloth!” 12[Bofur:] “But it’s full of holes!” [Bilbo:] “It’s supposed to look like that, it’s crochet.” [Bofur:] “Oh, and a wonderful game it is too, if you got the balls for it.” [Bilbo:] “Bebother and confusticate these dwarves!” [Gandalf:] “My dear Bilbo, what on earth is the matter?” [Bilbo:] “What’s the matter? I’m surrounded by dwarves. What are they doing here?” [Gandalf:] “Oh, they’re quite a merry gathering, once you get used to them.” [Nori has a chain of sausages over his shoulder, and Bofur grabs them from him. They play tug­of­war with the sausages.] [Bilbo:] “I don’t want to get used to them. The state of my kitchen! There’s mud trod into the carpet, they’ve pi­pillaged the pantry. I’m not even going to tell you what they’ve done in the bathroom; they’ve all but destroyed the plumbing. I don’t understand what they’re doing in my house!” [Ori:] “Excuse me. I’m sorry to interrupt, but what should I do with my plate?” [Fili:] “Here you go, Ori, give it to me.” [Fili takes the plate from Ori and throws it to Kili, who throws it behind his back to Bifur, who is standing at the sink in the kitchen. Bifur catches it behind his back, without even looking at it. Kili, Fili, and other dwarves begin throwing the plates, bowls, and utensils to each other, eventually throwing them to the sink to be washed. As dishware flies through the air, Gandalf ducks to avoid getting hit.] [Gandalf:] “Oh!” [Bilbo:] “Excuse me, that’s my mother’s West Farthing crockery, it’s over a hundred years old!” [The dwarves at the tablet begin rhythmically drumming on the tablet with utensils and their fists.] [Bilbo:] “And can­can you not do that? You’ll blunt them!” [Bofur:] “Ooh, d’hear that, lads? He says we’ll blunt the knives.” [Kili begins singing and the other dwarves join him, as they continue throwing the dishware] [The dwarves, singing:] “Blunt the knives, bend the forks Smash the bottles and burn the corks Chip the glasses and crack the plates That’s what Bilbo Baggins hates! 13Cut the cloth and tread on the fat Leave the bones on the bedroom mat Pour the milk on the pantry floor Splash the wine on every door Dump the crocks in a boiling bowl Pound them up with a thumping pole When you’ve finished, if any are whole Send them down the hall to roll ... That’s what Bilbo Baggins hates!” [Bilbo huffs up in anger, only to find all the dishes stacked neatly and cleanly. The dwarves and Gandalf laugh. Suddenly, there are three loud knocks on the door, and everyone falls silent.] [Gandalf:] “He is here.” [They open the door, and there stands Thorin. He enters Bag End.] [Thorin:] “Gandalf. I thought you said this place would be easy to find. I lost my way, twice. Wouldn’t have found it at all had it not been for that mark on the door.” [Bilbo:] “Mark? There’s no mark on that door. It was painted a week ago!” [Gandalf:] “There is a mark; I put it there myself. Bilbo Baggins, allow me to introduce the leader of our company, Thorin Oakenshield.” [Thorin:] “So, this is the Hobbit. Tell me, Mr. Baggins, have you done much fighting?” [Bilbo:] “Pardon me?” [Thorin:] “Axe or sword? What’s your weapon of choice?” [Bilbo:] “Well, I have some skill at Conkers, if you must know, but I fail to see why that’s relevant.” [Thorin:] “Thought as much. He looks more like a grocer than a burglar.” [The dwarves all laugh, and they walk back to the dining table. As Thorin eats, the rest of them talk to him.] [Balin:] “What news from the meeting in Ered Luin? Did they all come?” [Thorin:] “Aye. Envoys from all seven kingdoms.” [The dwarves murmur their joy.] [Dwalin:] “What do the dwarves of the Iron Hills say? Is Dain with us?” [Thorin:] “They will not come.] 14[The dwarves murmur in disappointment.] [Thorin:] “They say this quest is ours, and ours alone.” [Further disappointed murmurs.] [Bilbo:] “You’re going on a quest?” [Gandalf:] “Bilbo, my dear fellow, let us have a little more light.” [Bilbo brings a candle to the table, where Gandalf has spread out a map which was in his pocket.] [Gandalf:] “Far to the East, over ranges and rivers, beyond woodlands and wastelands, lies a single solitary peak.” [Bilbo­reading the map:] “The Lonely Mountain.” [Gloin:] “Aye. Oin has read the portents, and the portents say it is time.” [Oin:] “Ravens have been seen flying back to the mountain as it was foretold: When the birds of yore return to Erebor, the reign of the beast will end.” [Bilbo, hearing “the beast,” looks concerned.] [Bilbo:] “Uh, What beast?” [Bofur:] “Well that would be a reference to Smaug the Terrible, chiefest and greatest calamity of our age. Airborne fire­breather, teeth like razors, claws like meathooks, extremely fond of precious metals­­” [Bilbo:] “Yes, I know what a dragon is.” [Ori:] “I’m not afraid! I’m up for it. I’ll give him a taste of the Dwarfish iron right up his jacksie.” [Several dwarves shout.] [Dori:] “Sit down!” [Balin:] “The task would be difficult enough with an army behind us. But we number just thirteen, and not thirteen of the best, nor brightest.” [The dwarves start objecting, saying things like, “Hey, who are you calling dim?” “Watch it!”, and “No!”] [Oin:] “What did he say?” [Fili:] “We may be few in number, but we’re fighters, all of us, to the last dwarf!” [Kili:] “And you forget, we have a wizard in our company. Gandalf will have killed hundreds of dragons 15in his time.” [Gandalf:] “Oh, well, now, uh, I­I­I wouldn’t say that, I­ ­” [Dori:] “How many, then?” [Gandalf:] “Uh, what?” [Dori:] “Well, how many dragons have you killed? Go on, give us a number!” [Gandalf:] “Hm.” [Gandalf embarrassedly starts coughing on his pipe smoke; the dwarves jump to their feet, arguing about the number of dragons Gandalf has killed. Thorin jumps up in anger and bellows, silencing the rest.] [Thorin:] “Shazara! [not translated onscreen: Silence!] If we have read these signs, do you not think others will have read them too? Rumours have begun to spread. The dragon Smaug has not been seen for 60 years. Eyes look east to the Mountain, assessing, wondering, weighing the risk. Perhaps the vast wealth of our people now lies unprotected. Do we sit back while others claim what is rightfully ours? Or do we seize this chance to take back Erebor? Du Bekâr! Du Bekâr! [not translated onscreen: To arms! To arms!]” [All the dwarves cheer.] [Balin:] “You forget: the front gate is sealed. There is no way into the mountain.” [Gandalf:] “That, my dear Balin, is not entirely true.” [Twiddling his fingers, Gandalf produces a dwarvish key, ornately wrought. Thorin looks at it in wonder.] [Thorin:] “How came you by this?” [Gandalf:] “It was given to me by your father, by Thrain, for safekeeping. It is yours now.” [Gandalf hands the key to Thorin as everyone looks on in wonder.] [Fili:] “If there is a key, there must be a door.” [Gandalf points at runes on his map with his pipe.] [Gandalf:] “These runes speak of a hidden passage to the lower halls.” [Kili:] “There’s another way in!” [Gandalf:] “Well, if we can find it, but dwarf doors are invisible when closed. The answer lies hidden somewhere in this map and I do not have the skill to find it. But there are others in Middle­earth who can. The task I have in mind will require a great deal of stealth, and no small amount of courage. But, if we are careful and clever, I believe that it can be done.” 16[Ori:] “That’s why we need a burglar.” [Bilbo:] “Hm, A good one, too. An expert, I’d imagine.” [Gloin:] “And are you?” [Bilbo:] “Am I what?” [Oin:] “He said he’s an expert! Hey hey!” [Several dwarves laugh.] [Bilbo:] “M­­Me? No, no, no, no, no. I’m not a burglar; I’ve never stolen a thing in my life.” [Balin:] “I’m afraid I have to agree with Mr. Baggins. He’s hardly burglar material.” [Bilbo nods in agreement.] [Dwalin:] “Aye, the wild is no place for gentlefolk who can neither fight nor fend for themselves.” [Bilbo continues nodding in agreement; the dwarves begin arguing. Gandalf, growing angry, rises to his full height and casts darkness over the group as starts speaking in his “powerful” voice. The others stop in awe.] [Gandalf:] “Enough! If I say Bilbo Baggins is a burglar, then a burglar he is.” [Gandalf goes back to his normal self.] [Gandalf:] “Hobbits are remarkably light on their feet. In fact, they can pass unseen by most if they choose. And while the dragon is accustomed to the smell of dwarf, the scent of hobbit is all but unknown to him, which gives us a distinct advantage. You asked me to find the fourteenth member of this company, and I have chosen Mr. Baggins. There’s a lot more to him than appearances suggest, and he’s got a great deal more to offer than any of you know, including himself. You must trust me on this.” [Thorin:] “Very well. We will do it your way. [Bilbo:] “No, no, no.” [Thorin:] “Give him the contract.” [Bilbo:] “Please.” [Bofur:] “Alright, we’re off!” [Balin hands Bilbo a long contract.] [Balin:] “It’s just the usual summary of out­of­pocket expenses, time required, remuneration, funeral 17arrangements, so forth.” [Bilbo:] “Funeral arrangements?” [As Bilbo steps back a few feet to read the contract, Thorin leans toward Gandalf and whispers to him.] [Thorin:] “I cannot guarantee his safety.” [Gandalf:] “Understood.” [Thorin:] “Nor will I be responsible for his fate.” [Gandalf:] “Agreed.” [Bilbo reads parts of the contract out loud.] [Bilbo­­reading:] “Terms: Cash on delivery, up to but not exceeding one fourteenth of total profit, if any. Seems fair. Eh, Present company shall not be liable for injuries inflicted by or sustained as a consequence thereof including but not limited to lacerations ... evisceration … incineration?” [Bofur:] “Oh, aye, he’ll melt the flesh off your bones in the blink of an eye.” [Bilbo looks a little breathless.] [Bilbo:] “Huh.” [Balin:] “You all right, laddie?” [Bilbo bends over, nauseous and pained.] [Bilbo:] “Uh, yeah...Feel a bit faint.” [Bofur:] “Think furnace with wings.” [Bilbo:] “Air, I­­I­­I need air.” [Bofur:] “Flash of light, searing pain, then Poof! you’re nothing more than a pile of ash.” [Bilbo breathes heavily, trying to compose himself as the others stare at him.] [Bilbo:] “Hmmm. Nope.” [Bilbo falls on the floor in a faint.] [Gandalf:] “Ah, very helpful, Bofur.” 18[Bilbo is sitting on his chair, holding a mug and talking to Gandalf.] [Bilbo:] “I’ll be all right, let me just sit quietly for a moment.” [Gandalf:] “You’ve been sitting quietly for far too long. Tell me; when did doilies and your mother’s dishes become so important to you? I remember a young Hobbit who always was running off in search of elves and the woods, who’d stay out late, come home after dark, trailing mud and twigs and fireflies. A young Hobbit who would have liked nothing better than to find out what was beyond the borders of the Shire. The world is not in your books and maps; it’s out there.” [Bilbo:] “I can’t just go running off into the blue. I am a Baggins, of Bag End.” [Gandalf:] “You are also a Took. Did you know that your great­great­great­great­uncle, Bullroarer Took, was so large he could ride a real horse?” [The camera focuses on a portrait of Bullroarer Took on Bilbo’s wall.] [Bilbo:] “Yes.” [Gandalf:] “Well he could. In the Battle of Green Fields, he charged the goblin ranks. He swung his club so hard it knocked the Goblin King’s head clean off, and it sailed a hundred yards through the air and went down a rabbit hole. And thus the battle was won, and the game of golf invented at the same time.” [Bilbo:] “I do believe you made that up.” [Gandalf:] “Well, all good stories deserve embellishment. You’ll have a tale or two to tell of your own when you come back.” [Bilbo:] “Can you promise that I will come back?” [Gandalf:] “No. And if you do, you will not be the same.” [Bilbo:] “That’s what I thought. Sorry, Gandalf, I can’t sign this. You’ve got the wrong Hobbit.” [Bilbo walks away down the hall. Gandalf sighs. Balin and Thorin see Bilbo walking away.] [Balin:] “It appears we have lost our burglar. Probably for the best. The odds were always against us. After all, what are we? Merchants, miners, tinkers, toy­makers; hardly the stuff of legend.” [Thorin:] “There are a few warriors amongst us.” [Balin:] “Old warriors.” [Thorin:] “I will take each and every one of these dwarves over an army from the Iron Hills. For when I called upon them, they came. Loyalty. Honor. A willing heart. I can ask no more than that.” 19[Balin:] “You don’t have to do this. You have a choice. You’ve done honorably by our people. You have built a new life for us in the Blue Mountains, a life of peace and plenty. A life that is worth more than all the gold in Erebor.” [Thorin holds out the key Gandalf gave him.] [Thorin:] “From my grandfather to my father, this has come to me. They dreamt of the day when the dwarves of Erebor would reclaim their homeland. There is no choice, Balin. Not for me.” [Balin:] “Then we are with you, laddie. We will see it done.” [The dwarves gather in Bilbo’s living room, smoking their pipes by the fire. They all begin humming, and soon Thorin begins to sing, and the others join him (on the second stanza below). Gandalf listens from nearby; Bilbo listens from his bedroom.] [The dwarves, singing:] “Far over the misty mountains cold To dungeons deep and caverns old We must away ere break of day To find our long­forgotten gold The pines were roaring on the height The winds were moaning in the night The fire was red, it flaming spread The trees like torches blazed with light” [The camera focuses on sparks floating out of Bilbo’s chimney, then the scene fades into the night sky.] [It is morning. Bilbo wakes up on his bed, and suddenly realizes that his house is very quiet. He walks all around his house expecting to run into the dwarves; however, there is no one there. The house has been cleaned up completely from the mess of the party last night, almost as if it had never happened.] [Bilbo:] “Hello?“ [Bilbo looks a bit lonesome. He sees the Contract sitting on a table; he looks at it, then looks up with a determined face.] [Bilbo runs out the door of Bag End and down the path, wearing a travelling pack and holding the contract. He runs through Hobbiton, jumping over fences and pumpkins in his haste. His neighbors shake their heads at 20him.] [Neighbor:] “Hey! Mr. Bilbo! Where are you off to?” [Bilbo:] “Can’t stop, I’m already late!” [Neighbor:] “Late for what?” [Bilbo:] “I’m going on an adventure!” [The dwarves are riding their ponies, and Gandalf his horse, down a path through a wooded area. A few words of their conversation are heard, including “waste of time” and “use a hobbit”. Bilbo runs up from behind them.] [Bilbo:] “Wait! Wait!” [Some dwarves call “Woah!” and stop their ponies. Bilbo catches up to them and hands Balin the contract.] [Bilbo:] “I signed it!” [Balin takes the contract and inspects it with a pocket­glass. He then smiles at Bilbo.] [Balin:] “Everything appears to be in order. Welcome, Master Baggins, to the company of Thorin Oakenshield.” [The dwarves cheer. Thorin doesn’t look too impressed.] [Thorin:] “Give him a pony.” [Bilbo:] “No, no, no, no, that­­that won’t be necessary, thank you, but I­­I’m sure I can keep up on foot. I­­ I­­I’ve done my fair share of walking holidays, you know. I even got as far as Frogmorton once­­WAGH!” [Bilbo’s speech is cut off as two of the dwarves ride alongside him and pick him up from behind to put him on a pony.] [Bilbo is riding a pony and looking quite terrified. The pony neighs and tosses its head, making him quite uncomfortable..] [Oin:] “Come on, Nori, pay up. Go on.” [Nori tosses a sack of money to Oin; sacks of money begin passing between the dwarves.] [Oin:] “Hey, hey, hey!” 21[Some of the dwarves laugh.] [Bilbo:] “What’s that about?” [Gandalf:] “Oh, they took wagers on whether or not you’d turn up. Most of them bet that you wouldn’t.” [Bilbo:] “What did you think?” [Gandalf:] “Hmmm.” [Gandalf catches a sack of money tossed to him and puts it in his bag.] [Gandalf:] “My dear fellow, I never doubted you for a second.” [Bilbo sneezes loudly.] [Bilbo:] “Ohh. All this horse hair, I’m having a reaction.” [Bilbo searches his pockets for his handkerchief. He is unable to find it, and he looks up in shock.] [Bilbo:] “No, no, wait, wait, stop! Stop! We have to turn around.” [The entire company comes to a halt, and the dwarves start objecting and asking what the problem is.] [Gandalf:] “What on earth is the matter?” [Bilbo:] “I forgot my handkerchief.” [Bofur tears a strip of cloth from his clothing and tosses it to Bilbo.] [Bofur:] “Here! Use this.” [Bilbo catches the rag and looks at it in disgust. The dwarves laugh and begin to continue their journey.] [Thorin:] “Move on.” [Gandalf:] “You’ll have to manage without pocket­handkerchiefs and a good many other things, Bilbo Baggins, before we reach our journey’s end. You were born to the rolling hills and little rivers of the Shire, but home is now behind you; the world is ahead.” [We see the Company travelling through many beautiful areas of Middle­earth, including forest, hills, and plains.] [The company has camped for the night near the edge of a cliff. As Gloin sleeps, tiny flying insects get sucked into his mouth every time he inhales, and they are expelled when he exhales. Bilbo watches in disgust, then finally gets up and walks around. Most of the dwarves are asleep; Gandalf, Fili, and Kili are awake. Bilbo walks over to his pony and gives her an apple, after checking to see that no one is looking.] 22[Bilbo:] “Hello, girl. That’s a good girl. It’s our little secret, Myrtle; you must tell no one. sh, sh” [Bilbo hears a scream in the night air and becomes worried. He runs over to Fili and Kili.] [Bilbo:] “What was that?” [Kili:] “Orcs.” [Another scream is heard.] [Thorin, who was dozing, jerks awake upon hearing the word “Orcs.”] [Bilbo:] “Orcs?” [Fili:] “Throat­cutters. There’ll be dozens of them out there. The lowlands are crawling with them.” [Kili:] “They strike in the wee small hours, when everyone’s asleep. Quick and quiet; no screams, just lots of blood.” [Bilbo looks away in fright; Fili and Kili look at each other and begin laughing.] [Thorin:] “You think that’s funny? You think a night raid by orcs is a joke?” [Kili:] “We didn’t mean anything by it.” [Thorin:] “No, you didn’t. You know nothing of the world.” [Thorin walks off to the edge of the cliff and looks out over the valley; Balin walks up to Fili and Kili.] [Balin:] “Don’t mind him, laddie. Thorin has more cause than most to hate orcs. After the dragon took the Lonely Mountain, King Thror tried to reclaim the ancient dwarf kingdom of Moria. But our enemy had got there first.” [Flashback of the Battle of Azanulbizar; thousand of dwarves and orcs fight in front of the gates of Moria. We see Thorin, Thror, Thrain, Balin, and Dwalin fighting fiercely. A massive, pale, orc wipes out many dwarves with his mace, then engages King Thror.] [Balin:] “Moria had been taken by legions of Orcs lead by the most vile of all their race: Azog, the Defiler. The giant Gundabad Orc had sworn to wipe out the line of Durin. He began by beheading the King.” [Azog, having defeated King Thror, holds up his beheaded head as he roars; he then flings the head, which bounces and rolls to Thorin’s feet.] [Thorin, in flashback:] “Nooo!” [Balin:] “Thrain, Thorin’s father, was driven mad by grief. He went missing, taken prisoner or killed, we 23did not know. We were leaderless. Defeat and death were upon us.” [In the flashback, the orcs have overpowered the dwarves, and the dwarves flee for their lives.] [Balin:] “That is when I saw him: a young dwarf prince facing down the Pale Orc.” [Thorin faces Azog; Azog swings his mace and knocks away first Thorin’s shield, then his sword. Thorin falls down an embankment and lands on the ground.] [Balin:] “He stood alone against this terrible foe, his armor rent…wielding nothing but an oaken branch as a shield” [Azog leaps to smash Thorin, but Thorin, grabbing an oaken branch lying on the round, manages to roll away in time. Azog continues wielding his mace against Thorin, who is still on the ground, but Thorin blocks his mace with the oaken branch, which he uses as a shield. As Azog swings one last time, Thorin, grabbing a sword lying nearby, cuts off Azog’s left arm, his mace arm, from below the elbow. Azog clutches the stump of his arm as he howls in pain.] [Balin:] “Azog, the Defiler, learned that day that the line of Durin would not be so easily broken.” [Azog is rushed into Moria by other orcs; Thorin, yelling “Du Bekâr! Du Bekâr!” (not translated onscreen: ‘To arms! To arms!’), rallies the dwarves to battle. They stop fleeing and return to battle, fighting ferociously. The dwarves now seem to have the advantage.] [Balin:] “Our forces rallied and drove the orcs back. Our enemy had been defeated. But there was no feast, no song, that night, for our dead were beyond the count of grief. We few had survived.” [The battlefield is covered in the corpses of dwarves and orcs; the surviving dwarves weep with one another over their loss. A younger Balin and Dwalin hug and put their foreheads together as they weep. Balin, still weeping, looks up and sees Thorin framed in the sunlight, holding his oaken branch.] [Balin:] “And I thought to myself then, there is one who I could follow. There is one I could call King.” [In the present, Thorin turns away from the view beyond the cliff; the entire Company is awake and standing in awe, staring at him. Thorin walks between them toward the fire.] [Bilbo:] “But the pale orc? What happened to him?” [Thorin:] “He slunk back into the hole whence he came. That filth died of his wounds long ago.” [The camera zooms away from the Company’s campsite, and focuses on another cliff across the valley. A group of Wargs and Orcs is there, spying on the Company. Yazneg, their leader, talks to the rest.] [Yazneg:] “Send word to the Master. We have found the Dwarf­scum.” 24[The Company rides their ponies through a muddy forest as it rains. They all look cold, wet, and miserable.] [Dori:] “Here, Mr. Gandalf, can’t you do something about this deluge?” [Gandalf:] “It is raining, Master Dwarf, and it will continue to rain until the rain is done. If you wish to change the weather of the world, you should find yourself another wizard.” [Bilbo:] “Are there any?” [Gandalf:] “What?” [Bilbo:] “Other wizards?” [Gandalf:] “There are five of us. The greatest of our order is Saruman, the White. Then there are the two Blue Wizards; you know, I’ve quite forgotten their names.” [Bilbo:] “And who is the fifth?” [Gandalf:] “Well, that would be Radagast, the Brown.” [Bilbo:] “Is he a great Wizard or is he...more like you?” [Gandalf looks slightly offended.] [Gandalf:] “I think he’s a very great wizard, in his own way. He’s a gentle soul who prefers the company of animals to others. He keeps a watchful eye over the vast forest lands to the East, and a good thing too, for always Evil will look to find a foothold in this world.” [Radagast runs through a forest. He examines a dying plant.] [Radagast:] “Not good; not good at all.” [As Radagast continues running, we see many dead animals lying around. Radagast plucks a mushroom and puts it in his bag. He feels and tastes the sap of a tree which appears to be infected; he grows more and more worried. He whistles, and his bird appears. Radagast lifts his hat, and the bird and its mate land in their nest, which is on Radagast’s head. Radagast gasps and runs over to a hedgehog lying on the floor; it appears to be dying. He cradles it.] [Radagast:] “Oh no! Sebastian! Good gracious.” [Running through the forest, Radagast brings Sebastian to his home, Rhosgobel. There, he attempts to cure the hedgehog using various medicinal and magical techniques, to no avail. The hedgehog’s family surround it, and Radagast tells them to move.] [Radagast:] “Move back! Give him some air, for goodness sake!” 25[Radagast continues his treatments, but they don’t work. The hedgehog writhes in pain.] [Radagast:] “I don’t understand why it’s not working; it’s not as if it’s witchcraft...” [A strange look comes over his face, and he speaks in a different, deeper voice than before.] [Radagast:] “Witchcraft. But it is. A dark and powerful magic.” [Hearing a noise, Radagast looks up and sees several giant spiders crawling up the side of his house. Radagast hurriedly braces his door shut with a bench. The hedgehog suddenly croaks, gasping for air, then seemingly expires. Radagast seems to be about to cry; however, the house starts creaking with the sound of the spiders crawling over the roof. Radagast runs over to his staff and pulls out the blue stone embedded at the top. As all the small rodents and other animals in his house flee, Radagast cradles Sebastian and whispers a spell, while holding the blue stone to the hedgehog’s muzzle.] [Radagast:] “Lerya laman naiquentallo” [not translated onscreen: Free the animal from the curse]. “Sí a hlare ómaquettar” [not translated onscreen: Now hear words of my voice] “Na coilerya en­vinyanta” [not translated onscreen: Be its life renewed]. Sí a hlare ómaquettar. Na coilerya en­vinyanta.” [The spiders begin to break through the thatched roof. Radagast goes into a trance­like state, and his spell grows more and more powerful, as darkness falls over the house. A black, inky shadow is slowly extracted from the hedgehog and into the stone. Suddenly, the hedgehog gasps for air and wakes up, and light returns to the area; the spiders crawl off the house. Running outside, Radagast sees spider webs all around his house, and he sees the giant spiders crawling off into the forest.] [Radagast:] “Where on this good earth did those foul creatures come from?” [His bird flies to him, and he converses with it.] [Radagast:] “The old fortress? Show me.” [Radagast rides through the forest on a sleigh pulled by several large rabbits. As he proceeds, the forest become dark and gloomy, covered in cobwebs. An old, ruined fortress is seen in the distance.] [The Company arrives at an old, abandoned farmhouse that is in ruins.] [Thorin:] “We’ll camp here for the night. Fili, Kili, look after the ponies. Make sure you stay with them.” [Gandalf:] “A farmer and his family used to live here.” [Thorin:] “Oin, Gloin.” [Gloin:] “Aye?” [Thorin:] “Get a fire going.” 26[Gloin:] “Right you are.” [Gandalf:] “I think it would be wiser to move on. We could make for the Hidden Valley.” [Thorin:] “I have told you already, I will not go near that place.” [Gandalf:] “Why not? The elves could help us. We could get food, rest, advice.” [Thorin:] “I do not need their advice.” [Gandalf:] “We have a map that we cannot read. Lord Elrond could help us.” [Thorin:] “Help? A dragon attacks Erebor, what help came from the Elves? Orcs plunder Moria, desecrate our sacred halls, the Elves looked on and did nothing. You ask me to seek out the very people who betrayed my grandfather and betrayed my father.” [Gandalf:] “You are neither of them. I did not give you that map and key for you to hold on to the past.” [Thorin:] “I did not know that they were yours to keep.” [Gandalf stomps off angrily, leaving the Company.] [Bilbo:] “Everything alright? Gandalf, where are you going?” [Gandalf:] “To seek the company of the only one around here who’s got any sense.” [Bilbo:] “Who’s that?” [Gandalf:] “Myself, Mr. Baggins! I’ve had enough of dwarves for one day.” [Thorin:] “Come on, Bombur, we’re hungry.” [Bilbo, to Balin:] “Is he coming back?” [Balin looks unsure.] [It is nighttime; Bombur has prepared a dinner of soup, and the dwarves are eating it.] [Bilbo:] “He’s been a long time.” [Bofur:] “Who?” [Bilbo:] “Gandalf.” [Bofur:] “He’s a wizard! He does as he chooses. Here, do us a favor: take this to the lads.” 27[Bofur hands Bilbo two bowls of soup to take to Fili and Kili; Bilbo leaves. Bombur tries to take more soup.] [Bofur:] “Stop it, you’ve had plenty.” [Bilbo goes out in the dark to where Fili and Kili are watching the ponies. They are staring out into the dark and don’t take the soup from Bilbo when he hands it to them.] [Bilbo:] “What’s the matter?” [Kili:] “We’re supposed to be looking out for the ponies.” [Fili:] “Only we’ve encountered a slight problem.” [Kili:] “We had sixteen.” [Fili:] “Now there’s fourteen.” [They all examine the group of ponies.] [Kili:] “Daisy and Bungo are missing.” [Bilbo:] “Well, that’s not good. That is not good at all. Shouldn’t we tell Thorin?” [Fili:] “Uhh, no. Let’s not worry him. As our official burglar, we thought you might like to look into it.” [Bilbo looks around and sees some trees recently uprooted and laying on the ground.] [Bilbo:] “Well, uh...look, some­­something big uprooted these trees.” [Kili:] “That was our thinking.” [Bilbo:] “Something very big, and possibly quite dangerous.” [Fili:] “Hey! There’s a light. Over here! Stay down.” [As the three of them quietly run through the forest toward the light Fili has seen, and they hide behind a log when they realize that it is a fire. Harsh laughter sounds from near the fire.] [Bilbo:] “What is it?” [Kili:] “Trolls.” [Fili and Kili run toward the fire; Bilbo starts to follow them, then returns to grab the two bowls of soup he left on the log. He then continues following them. Bilbo hides behind a tree and sees a massive mountain troll walking toward the fire, carrying a pony under each arm.] [Bilbo:] “He’s got Myrtle and Minty! I think they’re going to eat them, we have to do something.” 28[Kili:] “Yes; you should. Mountain trolls are slow and stupid, and you’re so small.” [Bilbo:] “N­­n­­no­­” [Kili:] “They’ll never see you.” [Bilbo:] “No, no, no...” [Kili:] “It’s perfectly safe! We’ll be right behind you.” [Fili:] “If you run into trouble, hoot twice like a barn owl, once like a brown owl.” [Fili and Kili push Bilbo toward the fire. He begins whispering Fili’s instructions to himself, trying to remember them, but gets mixed up.] [Bilbo:] “Twice like a barn owl, twice like a brown­­once like a brown? Are you sure this is a good idea?” [Bilbo turns around, but Fili and Kili are already out of sight. The three trolls, Tom, Bert, and William, sit around a fire on which a cauldron of something is cooking. Tom is the troll who brought the ponies. William has on a dirty vest. Bert is the cook and is wearing an apron.] [Bert:] “Mutton yesterday, mutton today, and blimey, if it don’t look like mutton again tomorrow.” [Tom:] “Quit yer’ griping. These ain’t sheep. These is West Nags!” [William:] “Oh, I don’t like `orse. I never `ave. Not enough fat on them.” [Bert:] “Well, it’s better than the leathery old farmer. All skin and bone, he was. I’m still picking bits of him out of me teeth.” [William sneezes into the pot they have boiling over a fire.] [Bert:] “Oh, that’s lovely, that is; a floater.” [Tom:] “Oh, might improve the flavor!” [William:] “Ah! There’s more where that came from.” [He begins to sneeze more, but Bert grabs him by the nose. Bilbo, unseen, gets behind them.] [Bert:] “Oh no you don’t.” [Bert throws William down.] [William:] “Ow! Ow! Ow!” [Bert:] “Sit down.” 29[William sneezes again, this time into a handkerchief he pulls out from behind him. He sniffs for a long time. Bilbo, reaching the pen in which the ponies are held, attempts to untie the ropes. He hides as William turns towards him.] [William:] “I hope you’re gonna gut these nags. I don’t like the stinky parts.” [Bert hits William with his ladle, and William squeals in pain.] [Bert:] “I said sit down!” [Tom:] “I’m starving! Are we `aving horse tonight or what?” [Bert:] “Shut your cakehole. You’ll eat what I give ya’.” [As William pulls out his handkerchief, Bilbo sees that he’s wearing a long knife in his belt. Bilbo, unable to untie the ropes restraining the ponies, attempts to get the knife from the troll.] [Tom:] “How come ‘e’s the cook? Everything tastes the same. Everything tastes like chicken.” [William:] “Except the chicken.” [Tom:] “That tastes like fish!” [Bert:] “I’m just saying, a little appreciation would be nice. ‘Thank you very much, Bert,’ ‘Lovely stew, Bert’; how hard is that? Hmm, it just needs a sprinkle of squirrel dung.” [William picks up a mug of drink, but Tom gets mad at him.] [Bert:] “There, that’s my grog!” [William:] “Uhh, uhh, sorry.” [Bert hits William with his ladle again, knocking him down. He gets back up. Bert tastes the soup in his ladle.] [Bert:] “Ooh, that is beautifully balanced, that is.” [Bert lets Tom taste some of the soup in the ladle; Tom gulps it down.] [Bert:] “Wrap your [indistinguishable] around that, mate. Eh? Good, innit? Heh, heh, heh. That’s why I’m the cook.” [Bilbo gets behind William and tries to reach for the knife, but William stand up and scratches his bottom. Bilbo is disgusted.] [Tom:] “Me guts are grumbling, I’ve got to snaffle something. Flesh I need, flesh!” [Wiilliam, about to sneeze, reaches behind him for his handkerchief, but accidentally grabs Bilbo instead, and 30sneezes all over him. He then realizes that he’s not holding any ordinary booger.] [William:] “Argh!!! Blimey! Bert! Bert! Look what’s come out of me ‘ooter! It’s got arms and legs and everything.” [The other trolls gather around to look.] [Tom:] “What is it?” [William:] “I don’t know, but I don’t like the way it wriggles around!” [William shakes Bilbo, covered in snot, off the napkin and onto the ground.] [Tom:] “What are you then? An oversized squirrel?” [Bilbo:] “I’m a burglar­­ uhh, Hobbit.” [William:] “A Burgla­Hobbit?” [Tom:] “Can we cook `im? [William:] “We can try!” [William tries to grab Bilbo, but he dodges, only to be cornered by Bert.] [Bert:] “He wouldn’t make more than a mouthful, not when he’s skinned and boned!” [Tom:] “Perhaps there’s more Burglar­Hobbits around these parts. Might be enough for a pie.” [Bert:] “Grab him!” [William:] “It’s too quick!” [As the trolls try to catch Bilbo, he runs around trying to dodge them. Bert accidentally hits William with his ladle while trying to hit Bilbo. Bilbo is eventually caught by the legs by Tom, and held upside down in the air.] [Tom:] “Come here, you little... Gotcha! Are there any more of you little fellas `iding where you shouldn’t?” [Bilbo:] “Nope.” [William:] “He’s lying.” [Bilbo:] “No I’m not!” [William:] “Hold his toes over the fire. Make him squeal.” [Kili suddenly runs out of the bushes and cuts William in the leg, making him howl and fall down.] 31[Kili:] “Drop him!” [Tom:] “You what?” [Kili:] “I said, drop him.” [Tom throws Bilbo at Kili; Bilbo lands on Kili, knocking them both down. The rest of the Company charges out of the bushes yelling and brandishing their weapons. They begin fighting the trolls, hacking, slashing, and hammering their legs. As the dwarves fight, Bilbo grabs William’s knife and cuts the ropes, freeing the ponies. Tom, seeing this, grabs Bilbo. The dwarves stop fighting when they see the trolls holding Bilbo by the arms and legs.] [Kili:] “Bilbo!” [Thorin:] “No!” [Tom:] “Lay down your arms, or we’ll rip his off.” [Thorin looks at Bilbo in frustration, then plants his sword in the ground. The others drop their swords and weapons as well.] [The trolls have tied several dwarves (Dwalin, Bofur, Dori, Ori and Nori) onto a spit and are roasting them over a fire; the rest (Thorin, Kili, Gloin, Bombur, Balin and Oin), and Bilbo, are tied up in sacks nearby.] [William:] “Don’t bother cooking them. Let’s just sit on them and squash them into jelly.” [Bert:] “They should be sautéed and grilled with a sprinkle of sage.” [Dori:] “Is this really necessary?” [William:] “Ooh, that does sound quite nice.” [Oin:] “Untie us, you monsters!” [Gloin:] “Take on someone your own size!” [The dwarves on the spit and in the bags are all making noises and talking in fear.] [Tom:] “Never mind the seasoning; we ain’t got all night! Dawn ain’t far away, so let’s get a move on. I don’t fancy being turned to stone.” [Bilbo, hearing what Tom said, has an idea.] [Bilbo:] “Wait! You are making a terrible mistake.” [Dori:] “You can’t reason with them, they’re half­wits!” 32[Bofur:] “Half­wits? What does that make us?” [Bilbo manages to stand up, although still tied up in a sack. He faces the trolls.] [Bilbo:] “Uh, I meant with the, uh, with, uh, with the seasoning.” [Bert:] “What about the seasoning?” [Bilbo:] “Well have you smelt them? You’re going to need something stronger than sage before you plate this lot up.” [The dwarves yell at Bilbo, calling him a traitor. The ones in sacks kick him.] [Tom:] “What do you know about cooking dwarf?” [Bert:] “Shut up, and let the, uh, flurgaburburrahobbit talk.” [Bilbo:] “Uh, th­­the secret to cooking dwarf is, um­­” [Bert:] “Yes? Come on. [Bilbo:] “It’s, uh­­” [Bert:] “Tell us the secret.” [Bilbo:] “Ye­­yes, I’m telling you, the secret is … to skin them first!” [Bert:] “Tom, get me the filleting knife.” [Gloin:] “If I get you, you little­­” [Dwalin:] “I won’t forget that!” [Tom:] “What a load of rubbish! I’ve eaten plenty with their skins on. Scuff them, I say, boots and all.” [Bilbo sees Gandalf slipping behind some trees nearby.] [William:] “`e’s right! Nothing wrong with a bit of raw dwarf! Nice and crunchy.” [William grabs Bombur, who is in a sack, and dangles him upside down over his mouth, about to eat him.] [Bilbo:] “Not­­not that one, he­­he’s infected!” [Tom:] “You what?” [Bilbo:] “Yeah, He’s got worms in his … tubes.” 33[William drops Bombur back into the pile of Dwarves in disgust.] [Bilbo:] “In­­in fact they all have, they’re in­­infested with parasites. It’s a terrible business; I wouldn’t risk it, I really wouldn’t.” [Oin:] “Parasites, did he say parasites?” [Kili:] “We don’t have parasites! You have parasites!” [Gloin:] “What are you talking about, laddie?” [The rest of the dwarves chime in about how they don’t have parasites and how Bilbo is a fool. Bilbo rolls his eyes as the dwarves mess up his plan. Thorin, understand Bilbo’s plan, kicks the others. They then understand and go along with it. All the dwarves begin proclaiming about how they’re “riddled” with parasites.] [Oin:] “I’ve got parasites as big as my arm.” [Kili:] “Mine are the biggest parasites, I’ve got huge parasites!” [Nori:] “We’re riddled.” [Ori:] “Yes, I’m riddled.” [Dori:] “Yes we are. Badly!” [Tom:] “What would you have us do, then, let ‘em all go?” [Bilbo:] “Well...” [Tom:] “You think I don’t know what you’re up to? This little ferret is taking us for fools!” [Bilbo:] “Ferret?” [Bert:] “Fools?” [Gandalf appears on top of a large rock above the clearing.] [Gandalf:] “The dawn will take you all!” [Bert:] “Who’s that?” [Tom:] “No idea.” [William:] “Can we eat `im too?” [Gandalf strikes the rock with his staff, splitting it in half, allowing the sunlight behind it to pour into the clearing. When the sunlight touches the trolls’ skin, they begin turning into stone amidst loud screams and howls of pain. Within seconds, there are three stone statues of trolls in the clearing. All the dwarves cheer for Gandalf. Of 34course, the dwarves on the spit, including Dwalin, still look uncomfortable.] [Dwalin:] “Oh, get your foot out of my back!” [It is morning; the dwarves have been freed from the spit and from the sacks. Gandalf walks to one of the troll statues and thumps it with his staff, with a pleased smile on his face.] [Thorin, to Gandalf:] “Where did you go to, if I may ask?” [Gandalf:] “To look ahead.” [Thorin:] “What brought you back?” [Gandalf:] “Looking behind. Nasty business. Still, they are all in one piece.” [Thorin:] “No thanks to your burglar.” [Gandalf:] “He had the nous to play for time. None of the rest of you thought of that.” [Thorin looks repentant. Gandalf and Thorin examine the statues of the trolls.] [Gandalf:] “They must have come down from the Ettenmoors.” [Thorin:] “Since when do mountain trolls venture this far south?” [Gandalf:] “Oh, not for an age, not since a darker power ruled these lands.” [Gandalf and Thorin look meaningfully at each other.] [Gandalf:] “They could not have moved in daylight.” [Thorin:] “There must be a cave nearby.” [The company finds a large cave nearby, and they enter it. It is full of treasure the trolls have been hoarding.] [Nori:] “Oh, what’s that stench?!” [Gandalf:] “It’s a troll hoard. Be careful what you touch.” [As they enter the cave, many of the dwarves cough and retch at the pungence. Inside, they find piles of gold coins and other treasure in caskets.] [Bofur:] “Seems a shame just to leave it lyin’ around. Anyone could take it.” 35[Gloin:] “Agreed. Nori, get a shovel.” [While exploring, Thorin finds two swords covered in cobwebs. Gandalf approaches him.] [Thorin:] “These swords were not made by any troll.” [Thorin hands one sword to Gandalf and keeps the other one.] [Gandalf:] “Nor were they made by any smith among men.” [Gandalf draws the sword in his hand out of its sheath a few inches.] [Gandalf:] “These were forged in Gondolin by the High Elves of the First Age.” [Realizing that they are Elven swords, Thorin starts to put his away in disgust.] [Gandalf:] “You could not wish for a finer blade.” [Reluctantly, Thorin holds on to the sword. He draws it out of its sheath a few inches as well.] [Some of the dwarves fill a chest with treasure, then bury it in a hole in the ground. Dwalin looks on in disgust.] [Gloin:] “We’re makin’ a long term deposit.” [Thorin:] “Let’s get out of this foul place. Come on, let’s go. Bofur! Gloin! Nori!” [On his way out, Gandalf steps on something metallic. Brushing aside the leaves beneath him with his staff, he finds another sword. Gandalf exits the cave and heads over to where Bilbo is sitting. He hands Bilbo the sword he just found.] [Gandalf:] “Bilbo”. [Bilbo:] “Hmm?” [Gandalf:] “Here. This is about your size.” [Bilbo:] “I can’t take this.” [Gandalf:] “The blade is of Elvish make which means it will glow blue when orcs or goblins are nearby.” [Bilbo:] “I have never used a sword in my life.” [Gandalf:] “And I hope you never have to. But if you do, remember this: true courage is about knowing not when to take a life, but when to spare one.” [Thorin:] “Something’s coming!” [Bilbo:] “Gandalf­” 36[Gandalf:] “Stay together! Hurry now. Arm yourselves.” [Bilbo slowly draws his sword and looks at it. He then follows the others, who have run off into the woods.] [Radagast rides at full speed through the forest on his rabbit­drawn sled. He pulls up short by the Company.] [Radagast:] “Thieves! Fire! Murder!” [Gandalf:] “Radagast! Radagast the Brown. Ah. What on earth are you doing here?” [Radagast:] “I was looking for you, Gandalf. Something’s wrong. Something’s terribly wrong.” [Gandalf:] “Yes?” [Radagast opens his mouth to speak, but shuts it. He opens his mouth again, but closes it again. He has forgotten what he was going to say.] [Radagast:] “Oh, just give me a minute. Um, oh, I had a thought, and now I’ve lost it. It was, it was right there, on the tip of my tongue.” [He curls up his tongue, and looks surprised.] [Radagast:] “Oh, it’s not a thought at all; it’s a silly old...” [Gandalf pulls a stick insect out of Radagast’s mouth.] [Radagast:] “­stick insect!” [The dwarves and Bilbo look flustered. Radagast and Gandalf go off a few paces and speak privately.] [Radagast:] “The Greenwood is sick, Gandalf. A darkness has fallen over it. Nothing grows any more, at least nothing good. The air is foul with decay. But worst are the webs.” [Gandalf:] “Webs? What do you mean?” [Radagast:] “Spiders, Gandalf. Giant ones. Some kind of spawn of Ungoliant, or I am not a Wizard. I followed their trail. They came from Dol Guldur.” [Gandalf:] “Dol Guldur? But the old fortress is abandoned.” [Radagast:] “No, Gandalf, it is not.” [Flashback to when Radagast explored the old fortress when he chased after the spiders which attacked Rhosgobel.] [Radagast crosses a stone bridge and enters a dark, ruined fortress, his staff at the ready.] 37[Radagast, narrating:] “A dark power dwells there, such as I have never felt before. It is the shadow of an ancient horror.” [As Radagast walks through the seemingly abandoned fortress, a statue behind him slowly clenches its fingers around the hilt of its sword.] [Radagast, narrating:] “One that can summon the spirits of the dead.” [The spirit of a king, possibly the Witch­king of Angmar, attacks Radagast, but he fends it off with his staff. As the spirit disappears with a screech, it drops its blade.] [Radagast, narrating:] “I saw him, Gandalf. From out of the darkness, a Necromancer has come.” [Radagast sees a black shadow take the form of a man, and it whispers a dangerous­sounding speech. Radagast flees from the castle, pursued by bats. He calls to his rabbits which are waiting with the sled.] [Radagast:] “Quick! Quickly! Run! Wait for me!” [The rabbits start running, and Radagast has to run hard to catch up with and jump onto his sled. He races through the forest with the bats behind him, dodging tree trunks and hitting the bats with his staff.] [In the present, Radagast “wakes up” from his flashback, and realizes that he has gotten very excited.] [Radagast:] “I’m sorry.” [Gandalf:] “Try a bit of Old Toby. It’ll help settle your nerves.” [Gandalf cleans his pipe with his beard, then offers it to Radagast. Radagast breathes in the smoke.] [Gandalf:] “And out.” [Radagast, with his eyes crossed and a blissful look on his face, blows out the smoke, then stays in a trance­like state for a few seconds.] [Gandalf:] “Now, a Necromancer. Are you sure?” [Radagast pulls out a cloth­wrapped package and hands it to Gandalf. Gandalf unties it and opens it; upon seeing its contents, which the camera doesn’t see, he looks concerned.] [Radagast:] “That is not from the world of the living.” [Suddenly, a howl is heard in the distance.] [Bilbo:] “Was that a wolf? Are there­­are there wolves out there?” [Bofur:] “Wolves? No, that is not a wolf.” 38[From behind a nearby crag, a Warg appears; it leaps into the midst of the Company, knocking down one of the dwarves. Thorin strikes and kills it using Orcrist. Another Warg attacks from the other side; Kili shoots it with an arrow, bringing it down. However, it gets back up, only to be killed by Dwalin.] [Thorin:] “Warg­Scouts! Which means an Orc pack is not far behind.” [Bilbo:] “Orc pack?” [Gandalf:] “Who did you tell about your quest, beyond your kin?” [Thorin:] “No one.” [Gandalf:] “Who did you tell?” [Thorin:] “No one, I swear. What in Durin’s name is going on?” [Gandalf:]“You are being hunted.” [Dwalin:] “We have to get out of here.” [Ori:] “We can’t! We have no ponies; they bolted.” [Radagast:] “I’ll draw them off.” [Gandalf:] “These are Gundabad Wargs; they will outrun you.” [Radagast:] “These are Rhosgobel Rabbits; I’d like to see them try.” [Yazneg, the orc leader of the Warg Riders, and his Wargs are searching through the forest for the Company; suddenly, Radagast and his rabbits shoot out of the forest, and the Wargs start chasing him.] [Radagast:] “Come and get me! Ha ha!” [Gandalf watches from behind a rock as Radagast and the Wargs disappear in the distance.] [Gandalf:] “Come on!” [The Company rushes across a rocky plain. In the distance, Radagast is being chased by the Wargs. One of them crashes while trying to catch him. As the Company runs across the plain, they see the Wargs not too far from them, so they hide behind the rocks.] [Gandalf:] “Stay together.” [Thorin:] “Move!” 39[As the Company runs, Radagast drives his sled beneath an overhanging projection of rock; he ducks, but the Orc on the Warg behind him gets knocked off.] [As the chase continues, Thorin stops behind a rock so that he is not seen by the Wargs. Ori starts to run out of the cover.] [Thorin:] “Ori, no! Come back!” [Gandalf:] “Come on! Quick!” [As the dwarves continue running, Thorin turns to Gandalf.] [Thorin:] “Where are you leading us?” [Gandalf doesn’t answer. As the Warg scouts chase Radagast, one of them stops and scents the air. The dwarves take cover behind an outcropping of rock. The scout and his Warg appear on top of the outcropping, scenting the air. Thorin looks at Kili and nods; readying an arrow, Kili quickly steps out and shoots the Warg. The Warg and the orc on it fall near the dwarves, and the dwarves kill them. The sounds of their fight carry quite far; the other Wargs and Orcs stop chasing Radagast as they hear roars and screams from behind the rocks.] [Yazneg:] “The Dwarf­scum are over there! After them!” [The Warg scouts howl as they stop pursuing Radagast and begin pursuing the Company.] [Gandalf:] “Move. Run!” [The company runs through a grassy plain; Wargs begin to surround them from all sides.] [Gloin:] “There they are!” [Gandalf:] “This way! Quickly!” [They run for a while longer, then halt in a clearing as they see Wargs on all sides.] [Kili:] “There’s more coming!” [Thorin:] “Kili! Shoot them!” [Looking around, Gandalf sees a large rock; he runs toward it and disappears.] [Fili:] “We’re surrounded! [Kili begins shooting at the Warg and the Warg­riders, killing some of them.] [Kili:] “Where is Gandalf?” [Dwalin:] “He has abandoned us!” [The dwarves gather close to each other near the rock Gandalf disappeared by. As Yazneg and his Warg 40approach, Ori shoots a rock at Yazneg with his slingshot, to no effect. Thorin pulls out his sword.] [Thorin:] “Hold your ground!” [Gandalf pops up from a crack in the rock.] [Gandalf:] “This way, you fools!” [Thorin:] “Come on, move! Quickly, all of you! Go, go, go!” [As the Wargs approach, the dwarves and Bilbo slide into the large crack in the rock, sliding into a cave. Thorin kills a Warg that gets too close. Kili shoots another.] [Gandalf:] “Nine, ten” [Thorin:] “Kili! Run!” [Thorin and Kili jump into the crack last. Just as Yazneg and his Wargs reach the crack, an Elvish horn sounds, and a group of mounted Elves rush into the fray, shooting and spearing the Wargs and Orcs. The Company listens to the conflict from inside the crack. One of the orcs, shot by an arrow, falls into the cave. Thorin plucks out the arrow and examines its make.] [Thorin:] “Elves.” [There is a pathway at the end of the cave, leading away.] [Dwalin:] “I cannot see where the pathway leads. Do we follow it or no?” [Bofur:] “Follow it, of course!” [Gandalf:] “I think that would be wise.” [The Company begins following the path. It is quite narrow, and it is a crack between two tall cliffs. At times, the dwarves have difficulty going through. The pathway eventually opens out into an open area; there is a valley below, and in that valley is the city of Rivendell.] [Gandalf:] “The Valley of Imraldis. In the Common Tongue, it’s known by a another name.” [Bilbo:] “Rivendell.” [Gandalf:] “Here lies the last Homely House east of the sea.” [Thorin:] “This was your plan all along, to seek refuge with our enemy.” [Gandalf:] “You have no enemies here, Thorin Oakenshield. The only ill­will to be found in this valley is that which you bring yourself.” [Thorin:] “You think the Elves will give our quest their blessing? They will try to stop us.” 41[Gandalf:] “Of course they will. But we have questions that need to be answered. If we are to be successful, this will need to be handled with tact and respect and no small degree of charm. Which is why you will leave the talking to me.” [The Company walks across a bridge and enters Rivendell. A few elves are seen strolling about. Bilbo gazes in awe at the beauty of the place. The dwarves look uneasy.] [A dark­haired elf walks down a flight of stairs and greets them.] [Lindir:] “Mithrandir.” [Gandalf:] “Ah, Lindir!” [As Lindir and Gandalf greet each other, the dwarves murmur amongst themselves in distrust. Thorin whispers to Dwalin.] [Thorin:] “Stay sharp.” [Lindir]: “Lastannem i athrannedh i Vruinen.” [subtitle: We heard you had crossed into the Valley.] [Gandalf:] “I must speak with Lord Elrond.” [Lindir:] “My lord Elrond is not here.” [Gandalf:] “Not here? Where is he?” [Suddenly, the Elvish horns from earlier are heard again. The Company turns around and they see a group of armed horsemen approaching along the bridge at a rapid rate.] [Thorin:] “Ifridî bekâr!” [translated: Ready weapons!’] “Hold ranks!” [The dwarves bunch up together into a tight circle with their weapons pointed outward; the mounted Elves arrive and ride in circles around the dwarves. Eventually, they stop, and one elf, Elrond, separates himself from the others.] [Elrond:] “Gandalf.” [Gandalf bows gracefully.] [Gandalf:] “Lord Elrond. Mellonnen! Mo evínedh?” [subtitle: My friend! Where have you been?] [Elrond:] “Farannem ‘lamhoth i udul o charad. Dagannem rim na Iant Vedui.” [subtitle: We’ve been hunting a pack of Orcs that came up from the South. We slew a number near the Hidden Pass.] [Elrond dismounts from his horse, then he and Gandalf hug.] [Elrond:] “Strange for Orcs to come so close to our borders. Something, or someone, has drawn them 42near.” [He holds up an Orc sword and shows it to everyone, then hands it to Lindir.] [Gandalf:] “Ah, that may have been us.” [Thorin steps forward, and Elrond looks upon him with recognition] [Elrond:] “Welcome Thorin, son of Thrain.” [Thorin:] “I do not believe we have met.” [Elrond:] “You have your grandfather’s bearing. I knew Thror when he ruled under the Mountain.” [Thorin:] “Indeed; he made no mention of you.” [Ignoring this insult, Elrond turns to the dwarves and speaks in Elvish (Sindarin). The dwarves don’t understand what he is saying.] [Elrond:] “Nartho i noer, toltho i viruvor. Boe i annam vann a nethail vin.” [no subtitles; translation is: Light the fires, bring forth the wine. We must feed our guests.] [Gloin:] “What is he saying? Does he offer us insult?” [The dwarves grow bellicose and grip their weapons uneasily. Gandalf speaks exasperatedly.] [Gandalf:] “No, master Gloin, he’s offering you food.” [The dwarves quickly discuss this amongst themselves.] [Gloin:] “Ah well, in that case, lead on.” [The dwarves are sitting around tables in the Elven court, eating. However, they are not very appreciative of the Elves’ vegetables.] [Dori:] “Try it. Just a mouthful.” [Ori:] “I don’t like green food.” [Dwalin looks through a bowl of greens.] [Dwalin:] “Where’s the meat?” [Oin holds up a vegetable with his knife and looks at in disgust.] [Ori:] “Have they got any chips?” 43[An Elf maiden plays a harp in the background. Elrond and Gandalf walk through the halls of Rivendell.] [Gandalf:] “Kind of you to invite us. I'm not really dressed for dinner.” [Elrond:] “Well, you never are.” [They both laugh, and they arrive at the courtyard where the dwarves are eating. An elf maiden plays a flute; Oin, not liking the sound, stuffs a napkin in his hearing trumpet, and looks happy that he can no longer hear the music.] [Still at the feast, Elrond examines the swords Gandalf and Thorin found in the trolls’ hoard. He looks at Orcrist first.] [Elrond:] “This is Orcrist, the Goblin Cleaver. A famous blade, forged by the High Elves of the West, my kin. May it serve you well.” [He hands Orcrist back to Thorin, who accepts it with a nod. Elrond then examines Glamdring.] [Elrond:] “And this is Glamdring, the Foe­hammer, sword of the King of Gondolin. These swords were made for the goblin wars of the First Age...” [Elrond’s voice fades on the soundtrack, as Bilbo pulls out his sword and looks at it.] [Balin:] “I wouldn’t bother, laddie. Swords are named for the great deeds they do in war.” [Bilbo:] “What are you saying, my sword hasn’t seen battle?” [Balin:] “I’m not actually sure it is a sword; more of a letter opener, really.” [Elrond:] “How did you come by these?” [Gandalf:] “We found them in a troll hoard on the Great East Road, shortly before we were ambushed by orcs.” [Elrond:] “And what were you doing on the Great East Road?” [No one answers; Thorin looks perturbed.] [It is night. Gandalf, Elrond, Thorin, Balin, and Bilbo are standing in a hall in Rivendell.] [Thorin:] “Our business is no concern of elves.” [Gandalf:] “For goodness sake, Thorin, show him the map.” 44[Thorin:] “It is the legacy of my people; it is mine to protect, as are its secrets.” [Gandalf:] “Save me from the stubbornness of Dwarves. Your pride will be your downfall. You stand here in the presence of one of the few in Middle­earth who can read that map. Show it to Lord Elrond.” [Thorin thinks quietly for a few seconds, with everyone looking at him. He begins to hand the map to Elrond, and Balin tries to stop him.] [Balin:] “Thorin, no!” [Thorin brushes Balin aside and hands Elrond the map. Elrond looks at it.] [Elrond:] “Erebor. What is your interest in this map?” [Thorin is about to speak, but Gandalf interrupts him.] [Gandalf:] “It’s mainly academic. As you know, this sort of artifact sometimes contains hidden text. You still read Ancient Dwarvish, do you not?” [Elrond walks a little bit away, looking at the map. As the moonlight hits the map, Elrond realizes something.] [Elrond:] “Cirth Ithil.” [Gandalf:] “Moon runes. Of course. An easy thing to miss.” [Elrond:] “Well in this case, that is true; moon runes can only be read by the light of a moon of the same shape and season as the day on which they were written.” [Thorin:] “Can you read them?” [Elrond leads them all to an open area outside, on the side of a cliff, with waterfalls all around. The moon is behind some clouds. They walk toward a large crystalline table.] [Elrond:] “These runes were written on a Midsummer’s Eve by the light of a crescent moon nearly two hundred years ago. It would seem you were meant to come to Rivendell. Fate is with you, Thorin Oakenshield; the same moon shines upon us tonight.” [As they look up, the clouds covering the moon float away, and rays of moonlight hits the crystalline table, causing light to flow through the map which has been laid on the table. Ancient runes become visible on the map, and Elrond translates them out loud.] [Elrond:] “Stand by the gray stone when the thrush knocks, and the setting sun with the last light of Durin’s Day will shine upon the keyhole.” [Bilbo:] “Durin’s Day?” 45[Gandalf:] “It is the start of the dwarves’ new year, when the last moon of autumn and the first sun of winter appear in the sky together.” [Thorin:] “This is ill news. Summer is passing. Durin’s Day will soon be upon us.” [Balin:] “We still have time.” [Bilbo:] “Time? For what?” [Balin:] “To find the entrance. We have to be standing at exactly the right spot at exactly the right time. Then, and only then, can the door be opened.” [Elrond:] “So this is your purpose, to enter the Mountain.” [Thorin:] “What of it?” [Elrond:] “There are some who would not deem it wise.” [Thorin takes back the map gruffly.] [Gandalf:] “Who do you mean?” [Elrond:] “You are not the only guardian to stand watch over Middle­earth.” [As Elrond walks away, Gandalf turns slowly, thinking deeply.] [It is late at night. Wargs howl. Yazneg and his Warg Scouts and Wargs step into the ruin on Weathertop, where many other Wargs and Orcs are gathered. A large, white Warg growls at him. Behind the White Warg is a tall, pale Orc, facing away. It is Azog.] [Yazneg:] “Khozdayin… Dorguz… zuranimid.” [subtitle: The Dwarves, Master... we lost them.] “Shugi golgai gelnakhanishim­­” [subtitle: Ambushed by Elvish filth, we were­­] [Azog:] “Sha nargiz ob­hakhtil…” [subtitle: I don’t want excuses...] “Nargiz khobdi Rani Khozdil!” [subtitle: I want the head of the Dwarf King!] [Azog turns around and approaches Yazneg. His left arm, which Thorin Oakenshield cut off long ago during the battle of Azanulbizar, has been replaced with a metal arm and claw.] [Yazneg:] “Murganish dum…Turim hag shad.” [subtitle: We were outnumbered...there was nothing we could do.] “Zorzor go­kairaz obguraniz.” [subtitle: I barely escaped with my life.] [Azog:] “Ki go­kairag baganig.” [subtitle: Far better you had paid with it.] [Azog strokes Yazneg’s head with his right hand, then grabs and lifts Yazneg by the throat with his metal left hand. With a roar, Azog throws him against the pillars to the side. Wargs attack Yazneg, killing him and eating 46him. Yazneg’s fellow Rider quakes in fear at the sight; however, the White Warg and Azog are unfazed.] [Azog:] “Khozd­shrakhun gud sha kilyash­zag.” [subtitle: The Dwarf­scum will show themselves soon enough.] “Zidgar obod tung nash ru khobdud!” [subtitle: Send out word, there is a price on their heads!] [The rest of the Orcs leap on their Wargs; they all run off from Weathertop to do Azog’s will.] [Back in Rivendell, the Dwarves are having a late­night party in their quarters. They roast sausages over a fire made by burning the Elvish furniture. Bofur, seeing a heavy Bombur sitting on a bench and eating a large bowl of food, looks at his sausage thoughtfully.] [Bofur:] “Bombur!” [As Bombur looks up, Bofur throws him the sausage. Bombur catches it; the weight of the sausage is just too much for the bench, and the bench breaks; Bombur, shrieking, falls to the floor, along with all his food. The dwarves laugh uproariously.] [Gandalf and Elrond walk up a flight of stairs and into a pavilion.] [Gandalf:] “With or without our help, these dwarves will march on the mountain. They are determined to reclaim their homeland. I do not believe Thorin Oakenshield feels that he’s answerable to anyone. Nor for that matter am I.” [Elrond:] “It is not me you must answer to.” [Gandalf looks and sees a tall, beautiful, female Elf standing framed against the moonlight. She slowly turns around. It is Galadriel.] [Gandalf:] “Lady Galadriel.” [Galadriel:] “Mithrandir. It has been a long time.” [Gandalf:] “Nae nin gwistant infanneth, mal ú­eichia i Chíril Lorien.” [subtitle: ‘Age may have changed me, but not so the Lady of Lorien.] [Galadriel smiles.] [Gandalf:] “I had no idea Lord Elrond had sent for you.” [A voice sounds out of the darkness.] [Saruman:] “He didn’t. I did.” [Gandalf turns and sees Saruman the White; he bows to him.] 47[Gandalf:] “Saruman.” [Saruman:] “You’ve been busy of late, my friend.” [The White Council, composed of Saruman, Elrond, Galadriel, and Gandalf, are in the pavilion. Gandalf and Saruman sit at a table; Elrond and Galadriel stand or walk about. Dawn is slowly breaking.] [Saruman:] “Tell me, Gandalf, did you think these plans and schemes of yours would go unnoticed?” [Gandalf:] “Unnoticed? No, I’m simply doing what I feel to be right.” [Galadriel:] “The dragon has long been on your mind.” [Gandalf:] “This is true, my lady. Smaug owes allegiance to no one. But if he should side with the enemy, a dragon could be used to terrible effect.” [Saruman:] “What enemy? Gandalf, the enemy is defeated. Sauron is vanquished. He can never regain his full strength.” [Elrond:] “Gandalf, for four hundred years, we have lived in peace. A hard­won, watchful peace.” [Gandalf:] “Are we? Are we at peace? Trolls have come down from the mountains. They are raiding villages, destroying farms. Orcs have attacked us on the road.” [Elrond:] “Hardly a prelude to war.” [Saruman:] “Always you must meddle, looking for trouble where none exists.” [Galadriel:] “Let him speak.” [Gandalf:] “There is something at work beyond the evil of Smaug. Something far more powerful. We can remain blind, but it will not be ignoring us, that I can promise you. A sickness lies over the Greenwood. The woodsmen who live there now call it ‘Mirkwood’. and they say...” [Saruman:] “Well, don’t stop now. Tell us about the woodsmen say.” [Gandalf:] “They speak of a Necromancer living in Dol Guldur, a sorcerer who can summon the dead.” [Saruman:] “That’s absurd. No such power exists in the world. This...Necromancer is nothing more than a mortal man. A conjurer dabbling in black magic.” [Gandalf:] “And so I thought too. But, Radagast has seen­­” [Saruman:] “Radagast? Do not speak to me about Radagast the Brown. He is a foolish fellow.” [Gandalf:] “Well, he’s odd, I grant you. He lives a solitary life.” 48[Saruman:] “It’s not that. It’s his excessive consumption of mushrooms. They’ve addled his brain and yellowed his teeth. I warned him, it is unbefitting of the Istari to be wander in the woods...” [Saruman’s voice fades away as Galadriel focuses on Gandalf, and speaks to him in his mind.] [Galadriel, telepathically:] “You carry something. It came to you from Radagast. He found it in Dol Guldur.” [Gandalf, telepathically:] “Yes.” [Galadriel, telepathically:] “Show me.” [Gandalf lifts Radagast’s package, which he had in his lap, and places it on the table. It lets out a dull thud.] [Saruman:] “…or I’d think I was talking to myself…” [Elrond:] “What is that?” [Galadriel:] “A relic of Mordor.” [Elrond, who was reaching out to unwrap the package, draws his hand back. He then reaches for it again and opens it, revealing the sword Radagast took from the spirit in Dol Guldur. The White Council members look upon it in shock.] [Elrond:] “A Morgul blade.” [Galadriel:] “Made for the Witch­king of Angmar, and buried with him. When Angmar fell, men of the North took his body and all that he possessed and sealed it within the High­Fells of Rhudaur. Deep within the rock they buried them, in a tomb so dark it would never come to light.” [Elrond:] “This is not possible. A powerful spells lies upon those tombs; they cannot be opened.” [Saruman:] “What proof do we have this weapon came from Angmar’s grave?” [Gandalf:] “I have none.” [Saruman:] “Because there is none. Let us examine what we know. A single Orc pack has dared to cross the Bruinen. A dagger from a bygone age has been found. And a human sorcerer, who calls himself the Necromancer, has taken up residence in a ruined fortress. It’s not so very much, after all. The question of this dwarvish company, however, troubles me deeply. I’m not convinced, Gandalf; I do not feel I can condone such a quest. If they’d come to me, I might have spared them this disappointment. I do not pretend to understand your reasons for raising their hopes…” [Saruman’s voice fades away as Galadriel again focuses on Gandalf. She speaks to him telepathically.] [Galadriel, telepathically:] “They are leaving.” 49[Gandalf, telepathically:] “Yes.” [Galadriel, telepathically:] “You knew.” [Saruman:] “…I am afraid there is nothing else for it.” [Gandalf nods. Galadriel smiles slightly. A step is heard, and they all turn around; Lindir come up and bows.] [Lindir:] “My Lord Elrond; the dwarves, they’ve gone.” [It is morning; the dwarves are hiking along the path away from Rivendell.] [Thorin:] “Be on your guard; we’re about to step over the edge of the Wild. Balin, you know these paths; lead on.” [Balin:] “Aye.” [Bilbo turns around and looks back at Rivendell, longingly.] [Thorin:] “Master Baggins, I suggest you keep up.” [The dwarves and Bilbo continue on their journey.] [Back in Rivendell, Gandalf and Galadriel are the only ones remaining in the pavilion.] [Galadriel:] “You will follow them?” [Gandalf:] “Yes.” [Galadriel:] “You are right to help Thorin Oakenshield. But I fear this quest has set in motion forces we do not yet understand. The riddle of the Morgul blade must be answered. Something moves in the shadows, unseen, hidden from our sight. It will not show itself, not yet. But every day it grows in strength. You must be careful.” [Gandalf:] “Yes.” [Gandalf turns and starts walking away. When he has gone a short distance, Galadriel speaks again.] [Galadriel:] “Mithrandir? Why the Halfling?” [Gandalf:] “I don’t know. Saruman believes that it is only great power that can hold evil in check. But that is not what I have found. I’ve found it is the small things, everyday deeds of ordinary folk, that keeps the darkness at bay. Simple acts of kindness and love. Why Bilbo Baggins? Perhaps it is 50because I am afraid, and he gives me courage.” [Galadriel suddenly appears in front of Gandalf, and she takes his old, weary hands in hers.] [Galadriel, telepathically:] “Do not be afraid, Mithrandir.” [Galadriel, aloud:] “You are not alone.” [Galadriel tucks a loose strand of Gandalf’s hair back.] [Galadriel:] “Ae boe i le eliathon, im tulithon.” [subtitle: If you should ever need my help, I will come.] [Gandalf bows, and Galadriel gently moves her hands away from his. Gandalf looks up, and Galadriel has disappeared.] [Many scenic shots of the Dwarves and Bilbo hiking through the wilderness of Middle­earth, over ranges, mountains, and plains.] [They are crossing the Misty Mountains; the trail is narrow and dangerous, with a cliff on one side and a sheer drop on the other. There is a fierce storm in the air, with lightning and rain all around.] [Thorin:] “Hold on!” [As Bilbo walks, the stone beneath his feet gives away, and he starts falling into the chasm; Dwalin manages to pull him back in time.] [Thorin:] “We must find shelter!” [Dwalin:] “Watch out!” [The Dwarves look up and see a massive boulder hurtling through the air; it hits the mountainside above them, causing rocks to fall all around them as they press themselves against the mountain.] [Balin:] “This is no thunderstorm; it’s a thunder battle! Look!” [A stone giant rears up from a nearby mountain; it rips off a massive boulder from the top of the mountain.] [Bofur:] “Well bless me, the legends are true. Giants; Stone Giants!” [Thorin:] “Take cover: you’ll fall!” [Kili:] “What’s happening?” [Giant #1 throws the boulder far in the air; another stone giant, #2, appears from behind the Company, and it is hit in the head. The dwarves yell at each other to brace and hold on, and the rocks beneath their feet begin to give way from all the vibrations and from the impact of the falling rocks. The ground between some of the Company members splits; part of the group is on one side, and part on the other.] 51[Fili:] "Kili! Grab my hand! Ki..." [As the two stone giants fight with their fists, the dwarves hold on tight as they are flung around. One of the groups manages to jump to a different spot. A third stone giant appears, and it throws a boulder at the head of one of the first two. That one falls over; as the first group watches, it appears to them that the other group of the Company has been smashed to bits. The hurt stone giant loses its footing and falls down the chasm.] [Thorin:] “No! No! Kili!” [The group rushes to the spot where the others appeared to have been crushed, but they are safe.] [Balin:] “We’re all right! We’re alive!” [Bofur:] “Where’s Bilbo? Where’s the Hobbit?” [Ori:] “There!” [Dwalin:] “Get him!” [Bilbo is seen hanging onto the edge of the cliff with just his fingertips. Ori dives onto the ground and tries to grab Bilbo’s arm, but Bilbo slips and falls another few feet before he catches another handhold. As the dwarves try to pull him up unsuccessfully, Thorin swings down on the cliff next to Bilbo and boost him up, where the others pull him to safety. Dwalin tries to lift Thorin back up too, but Thorin loses his grip and begins falling too; however, Dwalin, with much effort, is able to pull him back up.] [Dwalin:] “I thought we’d lost our burglar.” [Thorin:] “He’s been lost ever since he left home. He should never have come. He has no place amongst us. Dwalin!” [They go off and find a cave.] [Dwalin:] “It looks safe enough.” [Thorin:] “Search to the back; caves in mountains are seldom unoccupied.” [Dwalin searches the cave with a lantern.] [Dwalin:] “There’s nothing here.” [Gloin drops a bundle of wood on the floor and rubs his hands.] [Gloin:] “Right then! Let’s get a fire started.” [Thorin:] “No, No fires, not in this place. Get some sleep. We start at first light.” 52[Balin:] “We were to wait in the mountains until Gandalf joined us. That was the plan.” [Thorin:] “Plans change. Bofur, take the first watch.” [Outside, in the valleys before the Misty Mountains, the White Warg sniffs the ground; Azog is on its back. He speaks in the Black Speech; the translated meaning is:] [Azog:] [subtitle: The scent is fresh! They have taken the mountain pass.] [He and the rest of the Warg Scouts race off after the dwarves.] [The Company is resting in the cave; all the dwarves are asleep. Bilbo, only pretending to be asleep, stealthily opens his eyes and looks around. Seeing that no one is watching, he quietly rolls up his blankets and packs his things. Grabbing his walking stick, he starts to leave the cave, tiptoeing over the sleeping dwarves.] [Bofur, who is standing watch, sees Bilbo trying to leave. He jumps up and tries to stop him. They whisper so as not to wake the others.] [Bofur:] “Where do you think you’re going?” [Bilbo:] “Back to Rivendell.” [Bofur:] “No, no, you can’t turn back now, you’re part of the Company. You’re one of us.” [Bilbo:] “I’m not though, am I? Thorin said I should never have come, and he was right. I’m not a Took, I’m a Baggins, I don’t know what I was thinking. I should never have run out my door.” [Thorin, who is awake, stares thoughtfully at the wall as he listens.] [Bofur:] “You’re homesick; I understand.” [Bilbo:] “No, you don’t, you don’t understand! None of you do ­ you’re dwarves. You used to ­ to this life, to living on the road, never settling in one place, not belonging anywhere.” [Bofur looks offended, and Bilbo is repentant.] [Bilbo:] “I am sorry, I didn’t...” [Thorin listens on.] [Bofur:] “No, you’re right. We don’t belong anywhere. I wish you all the luck in the world. I really do. [Bofur smiles and places his hand on Bilbo’s shoulder; Bilbo soon turns and begins to walk away.] 53[Bofur:] “What’s that?” [Something is glowing; Bilbo pull his sword partway out of its sheath and sees that it is growing bright blue, meaning Orcs are nearby. Thorin raises his head as he hears strange machinery noises and sees cracks form in the sand on the floor of the cave.”] [Thorin:] “Wake up. Wake up!” [Before anyone can react, the floor of the cave collapses downwards; the floor is really a giant trap door. The entire Company falls down a chute, slides through a tunnel, and lands in a giant wooden cage. As they struggle to get up, a horde of goblins attacks them, takes away their weapons, and drags them all away. As the dwarves are lead away kicking and yelling, Bilbo somehow gets missed by the goblins; not seeing him they leave him behind. Nori, looking over his shoulder, sees this happen. Bilbo scampers behind some railing to hide as he watches the goblins proceed through the tunnels. Bats fly in the darkness. Bilbo draws his sword, which is glowing bright blue, and slowly follows the goblins. Suddenly, one goblin jumps out in front of him and rushes at him with his sword. After a brief fight in which Bilbo barely manages to keep himself alive, the goblin and Bilbo both fall over the edge of a platform and fall through the darkness.] [Meanwhile, the goblin horde brings the dwarves through a vast network of tunnels and wooden bridges to the throne room and platform of the Great Goblin. The Great Goblin is a massive Goblin sitting on a throne, holding a mace topped with a skull. He is far larger than any other goblin, and he is incredibly ugly, with warts all over her swinging chin. The dwarves’ weapons are piled together. The Great Goblin jumps off his throne, trampling several goblins, and approaches the Company.] [Great Goblin:] “Who would be so bold as to come armed into my kingdom? Spies? Thieves? Assassins?” [Grinnah:] “Dwarves, Your Malevolence.” [Great Goblin:] “Dwarves?” [Grinnah:] “We found them on the front porch.” [Great Goblin:] “Well, don’t just stand there; search them! Every crack, every crevice.” [The goblins search the dwarves thoroughly, throwing away whatever they find. Oin’s hearing trumpet is thrown on the floor and crushed underfoot.] [Great Goblin:] “What are you doing in these parts? Speak!” [None of the dwarves respond.] [Great Goblin:] “Well then, if they will not talk, we’ll make them squawk! Bring out the Mangler! Bring out the Bone Breaker! Start with the youngest.” [The Great Goblin points at Ori. However, Thorin steps forward.] 54[Thorin:] “Wait.” [Great Goblin:] “Well, well, well, look who it is. Thorin son of Thrain, son of Thror; King under the Mountain.” [The Great Goblin bows exaggeratedly to Thorin.] [Great Goblin:] “Oh, but I’m forgetting, you don’t have a mountain. And you’re not a king. Which makes you nobody, really. I know someone who would pay a pretty price for your head. Just the head, nothing attached. Perhaps you know of whom I speak, an old enemy of yours. A Pale Orc astride a White Warg.” [Thorin looks up in surprise and disbelief.] [Thorin:] “Azog the Defiler was destroyed. He was slain in battle long ago.” [Great Goblin:] “So you think his defiling days are done, do you?” [The Great Goblin laughs, then turns to a tiny goblin sitting in a basket and holding a slate.] [Great Goblin:] “Send word to the Pale Orc; tell him I have found his prize.” [The tiny goblin writes down the message on his slate; cackling, he then pulls a lever, causing his basket to start sliding down a system of ropes and pulleys into the darkness.] [Bilbo regains consciousness and finds himself in a dark cavern, lying behind a clump of mushrooms. He sees the goblin who attacked him lying nearby, nearly dead. Suddenly, Bilbo sees a strange figure approaching the goblin. It is Gollum.] [Gollum:] “Yes. Yes. Yes! Yes! Gollum. Gollum.” [Bilbo, out of sight behind the mushrooms, watches as Gollum circles around the goblin. Gollum then begins pulling the goblin away by the feet. Suddenly, the goblin wakes up and begins flailing around. In a fit of rage, Gollum grabs a rock and pounds the goblin on the head with it, knocking it unconscious again. As Bilbo watches in horror, a golden ring falls out of Gollum’s loincloth and falls on the floor. Gollum resumes pulling the unconscious goblin away.] [Gollum:] “Nasty goblinses. Better than old bones, Precious; better than nothing.” [Bilbo, emerging from his hiding spot and retrieving his sword, follows after Gollum. By the light of the sword, he sees the Ring on the ground and he picks it up, examining it.] [Hearing Gollum singing in the distance, Bilbo puts the Ring into his pocket and follows the sound of Gollum’s voice.] [Smeagol:] “Too many boneses, Precious! Nothing of flesh!” 55[Gollum:] “Shut up! Get its skin off. Start with its head.” [Smeagol, singing:] “The cold hard lands, they bites our hands, they gnaws our feet. The rocks and stones, they’re like old bones, all bare of meat. Cold as death, they have no breath, it’s good to eat!” [Rounding a corner, Bilbo sees Gollum silhouetted on top of a rock in the middle of a small lake. Gollum is singing as he beats the goblin’s body. He smashes it in the head again with a rock. Seeing the glow of Bilbo’s sword, Gollum looks up. Bilbo quickly hides behind a rock, realizing that his sword is still glowing brightly. However, the sword’s light starts flickering, then completely dies out, signifying that the goblin is dead. Bilbo peeks out from behind the rock, then is shocked to see that Gollum is no longer there. Gollum stealthily paddles through the lake in his little boat, using his hands as paddles. Bilbo slowly looks up and finds Gollum on a rock above him; Gollum jumps down in front of Bilbo.] [Gollum:] “Bless us and splash us, Precious! That’s a meaty mouthful.” [Gollum approaches Bilbo, but Bilbo places the point of his sword on Gollum’s throat, causing Gollum to retreat in fear.] [Gollum:] “Aaahh. Gollum. Gollum. Ack” [Bilbo:] “Back. Stay back. I’m warning you, don’t come any closer.” [Gollum:] “It’s got an elfish blade, but it’s not an Elfs. Not an Elfs, no. What is it, Precious? What is it?” [Bilbo:] “My name is Bilbo Baggins.” [Gollum:] “Bagginses? What is a Bagginses, Precious?” [Bilbo:] “I’m a Hobbit from the Shire.” [Gollum:] “Oh! We like Goblinses, batses, and fishes, but we hasn’t tried Hobbitses before. Is it soft? Is it juicy?” [As Gollum approaches again, Bilbo holds out his sword in front of him and wildly waves it about.] [Bilbo:] “Now, now, K­­keep your distance! I’ll use this if I have to!” [Gollum snarls at Bilbo, causing Bilbo to step back.] [Bilbo:] “I don’t want any trouble, do you understand? Just show me the way to get out of here, and I’ll be on my way.” [Gollum:] “Why, is it lost?” [Bilbo:] “Yes, yes, and I want to get unlost as soon as possible.” [Upon hearing this, Gollum answers in a different voice than before; this is his Smeagol personality speaking.] 56[Gollum:] “Ooh! We knows! We knows safe paths for Hobbitses. Safe paths in the dark.” [The Gollum side suddenly takes over the Smeagol side; this exchange of control happens several more times in the rest of Bilbo and Gollum’s conversation.] [Gollum:] “Shut up.” [Bilbo:] “I didn’t say anything.” [Gollum:] “Wasn’t talking to you.” [Gollum:] “But yes, we was, Precious, we was.” [Bilbo:] “Look, uh, I don’t know what your game is, but I­­” [Gollum:] “Games? We love games, doesn’t we, Precious? Does it like games? Does it? Does it? Does it like to play?” [Bilbo:] “Maybe?” [Smeagol holds up his hands, then begins reciting a riddle.] [Gollum:] “What has roots as nobody sees, is taller than trees. Up, up, up it goes, and yet, never grows.” [Bilbo:] “...The mountain.” [Smeagol begins laughing uproariously.] [Gollum:] “Yess, yess, oh, let’s have another one, eh? Yes, come on, do it again, do it—do it again. Ask us.” [Gollum:] “No! No more riddles. Finish him off. Finish him now. Gollum! Gollum!” [Gollum snarls, and begins rushing at Bilbo to kill him, but Bilbo holds out his hand to stop him and begins speaking.] [Bilbo:] “No! No, no, no. I wa—I want to play. I do. I want to play. I can see you are very good at this. S—so why don’t we have a game of riddles? Yes, just, just you and me.” [Bilbo crouches until he is level with Gollum; Gollum scuttles forward, close to Bilbo, whispering excitedly.] [Gollum:] “Yes! Yes, just, just—just us.” [Bilbo:] “Yes. Yes. And—and if I win, you show me the way out.” [Gollum:] “Yes. Yes ­” 57[Gollum takes over and snarls, turning away from Bilbo. Gollum’s two personality’s talk to each other.] [Gollum:] “And if it loses? What then?” [Gollum:] “Well, if it loses, Precious, we will eats it!” [Gollum laughs to himself, then turns back to Bilbo] [Gollum:] “If Baggins loses, we eats it whole.” [There is a pause for several seconds as Bilbo digests this new information.] [Bilbo:] “Fair enough.” [Bilbo stands up and puts his sword away as Gollum looks on interestedly.] [Gollum:] “Well, Baggins first.” [As Bilbo thinks of a riddle, Gollum rests his hands and chin on the edge of a rock.] [Bilbo:] “Thirty white horses on a red hill. First they champ, then they stamp, then they stand still.” [As Gollum thinks, he keeps opening his eyes and mouth as if he knows the answer, then changes his mind. This goes on for several seconds, until he finally replies questioningly.] [Gollum:] “Teeth?” [Bilbo looks unhappy, as the answer is correct. Gollum becomes ecstatic and laughs throatily.] [Gollum:] “Teeth!! Yes, my Precious. But we—we—we only have nine.” [Gollum displays his mouth, showing that he really does only have nine teeth. Bilbo is disgusted. Gollum begins reciting his next riddle, while getting closer and closer to Bibo. Bilbo keeps a large rock between the two of them.] [Gollum:] “Our turn. Voiceless it cries, wingless flutters, toothless bites, mouthless mutters.” [Bilbo:] “Just a minute.” [As Bilbo walks off thinking, Gollum’s evil face turns into Smeagol’s excited face] [Gollum:] “Oh, oh! We knows. We knows!” [Gollum:] “Shut up.” [As Bilbo observes the water, he notices tiny waves forming as a breeze ruffles the surface of the water.] 58[Bilbo:] “Wind. It’s wind! Of course it is.” [Gollum snarls in frustration and begins slinking around, approaching Bilbo.] [Gollum:] “Very clever, Hobbitses, very clever.” [As he gets too close for comfort, Bilbo pulls out his sword and points it at Gollum again, but also begins saying his own riddle.] [Bilbo:] “Ah, ah, ah, ah. A—a box without hinges, key, o—or, or lid; yet golden treasure inside is hid.” [Gollum thinks hard, talking to himself and making many hand motions.] [Gollum:] “A box...and a lid...and then a key.... [Bilbo:] “Well?” [Gollum:] “It’s nasty. Uh, box, uh...” [Bilbo:] “Give up?” [Gollum:] “Give us a chance, Precious, give us a chance!” [In frustration, Smeagol begins pounding the floor and snarling. He puckers his face up deeply, then suddenly opens his eyes wide as he gets the answer.] [Gollum:] “Eggses! Eggses! [He laughs.] What crunchy little eggses, yes. Grandmother taught us to suck them, yes.” [As Smeagol laughs, a bat makes a noise in the darkness. Bilbo turns to look for the source of the noise; as he turns back around, he realizes that Gollum is gone. Gollum’s voice suddenly starts sounding like an echo from different parts of the cave. Gollum speaks his riddle from some unknown spot.] [Gollum:] “Ahh. We have one for you: All things it devours, birds, beasts, trees, flowers. Gnaws iron, bites steel, grinds hard stones to meal. Answer us.” [Bilbo:] “Give me a moment, please, I gave you a good long while.” [Bilbo tries to think while at the same time he walks around with his sword drawn, looking for Gollum,.] [Bilbo:] “I don’t know this one.” [Gollum:] “Is it tasty? Is it scrumptious? Is it crunchable?” [As Gollum says ‘crunchable,’ he appears behind Bilbo and tries to grab him by the throat, but Bilbo jumps away and points his sword at Gollum.] [Bilbo:] “Let me think. Let me think.” 59[Gollum:] “It’s stuck. Bagginses is stuck.” [Bilbo paces back and forth next to the water, thinking. Gollum smiles eerily and puts up his hands in a shrug.] [Gollum:] “Time’s up.” [Gollum shifts, preparing to leap on Bilbo.] [Bilbo:] “Time. Ti—the answer is time.” [Gollum snarls in frustration.] [Bilbo:] “Actually, it wasn’t that hard.” [Gollum:] “Last question. Last chance.” [Bilbo:] “Ah, uh....” [Gollum:] “Ask us. ASK US!!” [Although Gollum is smiling sweetly, he has a rock clutched behind his back with which to hit Bilbo. The first time he says “Ask us,” he says it sweetly. He then roars it a second time angrily.] [Bilbo:] “Yes, yes, alright.” [Bilbo strolls to the edge of the lake to think. He absentmindedly rubs his pocket and feels the ring inside.] [Bilbo:] “What have I got in my pocket?” [Gollum looks disgusted and angry.] [Gollum:] “That’s not fair. It’s not fair! It’s against the rules!” [In frustration, Gollum throws down the rock he’d been clutching. Bilbo makes a startled noise.] [Gollum:] “Ask us another one.” [Bilbo:] “No, no, no, no. You said ‘Ask me a question.’ Well, that is my question. What have I got in my pocket?” [Gollum jumps off his rock and approaches Bilbo; Bilbo moves to keep a rock between him and Gollum.] [Gollum:] “Three guesses, Precious. It must give us three.” [Gollum holds up two fingers to quantify three.] [Bilbo:] “Three guesses. Very well, guess away.” 60[Gollum:] “Handses!” [Bilbo pulls his hand out of his pocket just in time.] [Bilbo:] “Wrong, guess again.” [Gollum crouches on the floor, trying to think of the answer. He mutters potential answers to himself and slaps the floor in increasing anger and ferocity as he fails to come up with the right answer.] [Gollum:] “Fish­bones, goblins’ teeth, wet shells, bat’s wings ... Knife!” [Gollum:] “Oh, shut up.” [Bilbo:] “Wrong again. Last guess.” [Gollum:] “String!” [Gollum:] “Or nothing.” [Bilbo:] “Two guesses at once; wrong both times.” [Upon hearing this, Gollum falls to the floor, sobbing.] [Bilbo:] “So, come then, I won the game, you promised to show me the way out.” [Gollum:] “Did we say so, Precious? Did we say so?” [Gollum slowly turns around and glares hatefully at Bilbo.] [Gollum:] “What has it got in its pocketses?” [Bilbo points his sword at Gollum.] [Bilbo:] “That’s no concern of yours. You lost.” [Gollum:] “Lost? Lost? Lost?” [Gollum grins as he slowly approaches Bilbo, planning to kill him. He reaches for something hidden at his side; realizing that the item is not there, his face registers his shock. He begins groping all over himself trying to find it.] [Gollum:] “Where is it? Where is it? No! Ahh! Where is it? No! No!!!” [Gollum scuttles around the cave, scattering bones and rocks as he searches in vain for the Ring. He even splashes through the shallows of the lake. His voice breaks as he cries.] [Gollum:] “Lost! Curses and splashes, my precious is lost!” 61[While Gollum’s back is toward him, Bilbo, realizing what it was that Gollum lost, quickly takes the Ring from his pocket and holds it in his hand behind his back.] [Bilbo:] “What have you lost?” [Gollum:] “Mustn't ask us! Not its business! No! Gollum, Gollum.” [Gollum, leaning over the edge of the lake, sobs quietly. As he stares into the water, his sobs cease and his face becomes contorted in anger.] [Gollum:] “What has it got in its nasty little pocketses?” [In fear, Bilbo clutches the Ring behind him more tightly and points his sword at Gollum. Gollum slowly looks up in shock and anger. At first, he whispers; he then gets louder and louder until he is roaring.] [Gollum:] “He stole it. He stole it! Ahh! HE STOLE IT!” [Snarling, Gollum throws a stone at Bilbo. Bilbo deflects it with his sword, then runs away, with Gollum chasing him.] [Back in the throneroom of the Great Goblin, dozens of goblins carry massive instruments of torture on their shoulders, bringing them to the Great Goblin. Meanwhile, the Great Goblin is dancing and singing lustily.] [Great Goblin:] “Bones will be shattered, necks will be wrung! You’ll be beaten and battered, from racks you’ll be hung. You will lie down here and never be found, down in the deep of Goblin­town.” [Grinnah, one of the goblins, is examining the weapons the dwarves brought with them. He picks up Thorin’s sword, Orcrist, and slides it a few inches out of its sheath. Recognizing the sword, he gasps in horror and throws down the sword. It lands in view of all the goblins. Recognizing it, the goblins howl in fear and rage as they retreat from it; the Great Goblin runs rapidly to his throne, trampling many goblins on his way. He speaks loudly, pointing at the sword.] [Great Goblin:] “I know that sword! It is the Goblin­Cleaver, the Biter, the blade that sliced a thousand necks.” [As he speaks, Grinnah and the rest of the Goblins begin whipping the dwarves with ropes and leaping upon them, biting and slashing.] [Great Goblin:] “Slash them! Beat them! Kill them! Kill them all! Cut off his head!” [Goblins hold Thorin down, and one of them pulls out his knife and prepares to behead Thorin.] [Suddenly, there is a massive explosion of bright light; the sound goes muted as a shockwave rips through the area, flinging goblins in the air and destroying the torturing machines. Everyone is knocked down, including the Great Goblin. When the force of the explosion has passed, most of the lights in the area have been snuffed out; 62in the background, a shadow with a tall pointy hat walks up. It is Gandalf, holding his staff and his sword, Glamdring. Light slowly returns to the area as the goblins and the dwarves slowly look up, recovering from the shock. They all stare at Gandalf.] [Gandalf:] “Take up arms. Fight. Fight!” [The dwarves quickly get up and begin fighting the goblins. As goblins run at Gandalf, he kills them with his sword and staff. The Great Goblin, still lying on the ground, sees Gandalf’s sword and points at it, crying aloud to his goblins.] [Great Goblin:] “He wields the Foe­Hammer, the Beater, bright as daylight!” [Some of the dwarves reach their pile of weapons and begin tossing the weapons to each other; they use their weapons to defeat the goblins around them. Oin manages to reclaim his hearing trumpet, although it has been quite flattened. Nori, while fighting, lands on the floor; the Great Goblin runs at him and swings his mace.] [Dwarf:] “Nori!” [Thorin jumps forward and deflects the Great Goblin’s blow, causing the Great Goblin to stumble backward and fall off the edge of his platform, falling to the depths below. The rest of the dwarves and Gandalf continue to fight.] [Gandalf:] “Follow me. Quick! Run!” [Cutting down the goblins around them, the dwarves and Gandalf run along a pathway leading away from the throne room.] [Bilbo hurries through a cave, fleeing from Gollum, whom we can hear in the distance.] [Gollum:] “Give it to us!” [Bilbo is in a side cave; he sees Gollum running past the entrance of the cave he is in. Gasping, he turns around and tries to run through a crack in the wall. However, he gets stuck partway through. He looks up in fear as Gollum, attracted by the noise, backtracks and sees Bilbo stuck in the crack. Snarling, Gollum approaches Bilbo.] [Gollum:] “It’s ours. It’s ours!” [Gollum snarls again; Bilbo exhales and pushes as hard as he can; he manages to slip through the crack, but his waistcoat buttons are ripped off in the process and they hit Gollum in the face. Gollum snarls. On the other side of the crack, Bilbo falls down from his exertions. As he hits the ground, the Ring, which was in his hand, flies into the air. As it descends, Bilbo reaches up to grab it; instead of landing in his hand, however, the Ring slides onto his finger, and Bilbo suddenly becomes invisible. Gollum jumps into the area where Bilbo is, growling, and looks around for Bilbo; however, since Bilbo is invisible, he doesn’t see him, and Gollum continues down the cave. Bilbo, with the Ring on, sees everything as if he’s in a different reality. All the colors are muted, and the edges of everything are blurred and wavy.] 63[Gollum:] “Thief! Baggins!” [Seeing Gollum run away, Bilbo slowly stands up in shock.] [Gandalf and the dwarves are running through the suspended passageways of Goblin Town, with hundreds of goblins running after them.] [Gandalf:] “Quickly!” [A dwarf:] “Faster!” [Dwalin sees several goblins running at them from in front] [Dwalin:] “Post!” [He and some of the dwarves cut a guardrail post from the side of the path and they hold it out in front of them like a massive spear.] [Dwalin:] “Charge!” [He and the other dwarves charge at the oncoming goblins and sweep them away with the long rail. Dropping the rail, Dwalin pulls out his axes and begins knocking aside goblins. The rest of the company do the same. Gloin hits one goblin who falls and lands on another suspended path, breaking the path and dropping all the goblins on it into the darkness below. The rest of the Company also fight the goblins around them with their various weapons and fighting styles. Several goblins snarl as they swing on ropes toward the dwarves.] [Thorin:] “Cut the ropes!” [Thorin and some of the dwarves cut the ropes holding a raised platform in place; the platform falls outward, entangling the goblins swinging on the ropes. As Kili fights, several goblins start shooting arrows at him. He deflects some arrows with his sword; he then grabs a nearby ladder and drops it on the oncoming goblins. Kili and some of the other dwarves run forward, pushing the ladder and the goblins it has trapped in front of them. As they approach a missing area of the path, the goblins fall down into the darkness; the ladder, however, acts as a bridge for the dwarves to cross to the rest of the path. As soon as they cross it, Dwalin breaks the ladder, preventing the goblins chasing them from crossing it.] [Gandalf:] “Quickly!” [The dwarves and Gandalf continue running through the maze­like paths; they get on a section of the path suspended by ropes from above. They slice some ropes, and the pathway swings away from the rest of the path, approaching a different path.] [Thorin:] “Jump!” [Several of the dwarves manage to jump to the other path; however, before the rest can, the suspended path 64swings back like a pendulum to where it started, and several goblins leap on. As the path swings back again, the rest of the dwarves and Gandalf manage to jump to the new path as well; they cut the ropes, causing the swinging path and the goblins on it to fall. The dwarves and Gandalf continue running through the tunnels, killing all the goblins in their way. Gandalf strikes a rock above them with his staff, causing the rock to fall down and begin rolling in front of the Company, squashing all the goblins in their way. Soon, they approach a bridge between two walls of the cavern. As they try to cross it, the Great Goblin suddenly breaks through from underneath the bridge and pulls himself up onto the bridge, in front of the Company. As the Company pauses, hundreds of goblins approach them from all sides.] [Great Goblin:] “You thought you could escape me?” [The Great Goblin swings his mace twice and Gandalf, causing Gandalf to stumble back and almost fall.] [Great Goblin:] “What are you going to do now, wizard?” [Gandalf leaps forward and strikes the Great Goblin in the eye with his staff. The Great Goblin drops his mace and clutches his face in pain.] [Great Goblin:] “Ow, ow, ow!” [Gandalf steps forward and slices the Great Goblin in the belly; the Great Goblin falls to his knees, clutching his belly.] [Great Goblin:] “That’ll do it.” [Gandalf again swings his sword and slices the Great Goblin’s neck, causing him to fall down dead.] [His weight causes the bridge to start shaking; suddenly, the section of the bridge on which the company is standing breaks away from the rest of the bridge and starts sliding down the side of the cavern. The bridge slides at a terrific speed down the cavern’s wall, demolishing everything in its way; the dwarves cling on, screaming in terror. The bridge slows down and lands at the base of the cavern, breaking apart and burying the dwarves in the timber and wood. Gandalf gets up from the pile of wreckage and inspects the rest of the dwarves, who are still stuck in the wreckage.] [Bofur:] “Well, that could have been worse.” [Suddenly, the heavy corpse of the Great Goblin lands on the wreckage, squishing the dwarves further. They cry out in pain.] [Dwalin:] “You’ve got to be joking!” [As the dwarves extricate themselves from the rubble, Kili looks up and sees thousands of goblins running at them.] [Kili:] “Gandalf!” [Dwalin:] “There’s too many! We can’t fight them.” 65[Gandalf:] “Only one thing will save us: daylight! Come on! Here, on your feet!” [The dwarves get up quickly, helping each other out of the rubble, and they run away, following Gandalf.] [Gollum jumps into a tunnel, a tunnel with an exit to the side of the mountain. Daylight is visible through the exit.] [Gollum:] “Wait, my Precious! Wait! Gollum, Gollum.” [Bilbo slowly approaches, invisible with the Ring on. He has his sword drawn. Hearing a noise, Gollum quickly hides behind a rock. As Bilbo watches, Gandalf and the dwarves run by, escaping through the exit. Bilbo, seeing his companions, is frantic. The dwarves and Gandalf run down the side of the steep, tree­covered mountain. Gollum again enters the tunnel, looking for Bilbo and the Ring. Bilbo, still invisible, put his sword to Gollum’s neck, then pulls back to swing the sword and cut off Gollum’s head. Before he can swing, however, Gollum turns around, looking down the passageway behind him. He cannot see Bilbo, but Bilbo can see him. Again, Bilbo places the tip of his sword at Gollum’s throat, but he hesitates upon seeing Gollum’s extreme sadness. For a second, Gollum looks almost human. Bilbo lowers his sword, pitying Gollum and remembering what Gandalf told him about swords and courage. Bilbo then looks determined and takes a deep breath, stepping back a few feet. Hearing Bilbo’s feet, Gollum frowns and begins to growl. Bilbo runs forward and leaps over Gollum, stepping on Gollum’s head and knocking him over in the process. Still invisible, Bilbo runs out the exit. Gollum jumps up and scrabbles around him, trying to grab the invisible Bilbo, roaring all the while.] [Gollum:] “Baggins! Thief! Curse it and crush it, we hates it forever!” [Still invisible, Bilbo runs down the mountain after the rest of the Company. Far in front of him, Gandalf pauses to count how many dwarves are with him. The dwarves pause to collect their breath.] [Gandalf:] “Five, six, seven, eight...Bifur, Bofur...that’s ten...Fili, Kili...that’s twelve...and Bombur ­ that makes thirteen. Where’s Bilbo? Where is our Hobbit? Where is our hobbit?!” [Dwalin:] “Curse the halfling! Now he’s lost?!” [Gloin:] “I thought he was with Dori!” [Dori:] “Don’t blame me!” [Gandalf:] “Well, where did you last see him?” [Nori:] “I think I saw him slip away, when they first collared us.” [Gandalf:] “What happened exactly? Tell me!” [Bilbo, still invisible, has caught up to the rest of the group. He hides behind a tree as Thorin speaks.] 66[Thorin:] “I’ll tell you what happened. Master Baggins saw his chance and he took it! He’s thought of nothing but his soft bed and his warm hearth since first he stepped out of his door! We will not be seeing our Hobbit again. He is long gone.” [Bilbo, who is still invisible, hears everything Thorin said. He leans on the tree as he ponders what he has just heard. The dwarves look at each other.] [Bilbo:] “No, he isn’t.” [Bilbo steps out from behind the tree, no longer invisible. The dwarves look up in shock and relief. Gandalf laughs as he speaks.] [Gandalf:] “Bilbo Baggins! I’ve never been so glad to see anyone in my life!” [Bilbo strides forward into the group; he pats Balin affectionately on the shoulder.] [Kili:] “Bilbo, we’d given you up!” [Fili:] “How on earth did you get past the Goblins?!” [Dwalin:] “How, indeed.” [There is an awkward silence as Bilbo tries to think what to say. In the end, he gives a nervous laugh and puts his hands on his hips. Gandalf is the only one to notice Bilbo sliding the Ring into his waistcoat pocket. Gandalf looks a bit perturbed.] [Gandalf:] “Well, what does it matter? He’s back!” [Thorin:] “It matters! I want to know: why did you come back?” [Bilbo:] “Look, I know you doubt me, I know you always have. And you’re right, I often think of Bag End. I miss my books. And my armchair. And my garden. See, that’s where I belong. That’s home. And that’s why I came back, cause you don’t have one. A home. It was taken from you. But I will help you take it back if I can.” [After Bilbo speaks, there is silence as the dwarves think about what Bilbo said. Gandalf smiles slightly, happy that Bilbo has changed so much ­ for the better.] [Azog and his Warg Riders get to the top of the mountain.] [Azog:] [subtitle: Run them down! Tear them to pieces!] [He swings his mace forward, and several of his Wargs (without riders) leap forward and race down the mountain after the Company, howling. Hearing the howling, the Company members realize they are in danger.] [Thorin:] “Out of the frying pan...” 67[Gandalf:] “...and into the fire! Run! RUN!” [They all start running down the mountain as fast as they can. The Wargs follow them rapidly; it becomes nighttime. Soon the foremost Warg catches up to the group and leaps at Bilbo; Bilbo ducks behind a rock and the Warg’s jaws snap in the air over his head. The Warg lands in front of him. Growling, it charges at him.] [Bilbo pulls out his sword and holds it in front of him; the charging Warg impales itself in the head on the sword and falls down dead. Bilbo looks on in surprise. A few more Wargs catch up to the fleeing dwarves, but they are quickly dispatched. The Company reaches a large outcropping of land with a few trees growing on it; they are trapped there, as there is no way off the outcropping besides a great fall down the mountain.] [Gandalf:] “Up into the trees, all of you! Come on, climb! Bilbo, climb!” [Bifur throws an axe, killing a Warg which was approaching him. Bofur jumps off a rock and grabs a tree branch, using Dwalin’s head as a stepping stone to the tree. Other dwarves begin climbing into the trees as well. Bilbo tries to pull his sword out of the dead Warg’s head, but it is stuck firmly. He continues to pull.] [Thorin:] “They’re coming!” [Gandalf climbs to the top of the furthest tree; Dwalin boosts Balin up. Thorin, Bombur, and the rest climb up trees too. The main body of Wargs and Warg Riders approach. Bilbo finally manages to pull his sword out of the Warg; he looks up to see several more Wargs running at him. He quickly clambers up a tree as the Wargs rush below him. Dozens of Wargs circle the trees in which the Company members are perched. Gandalf reaches out with his staff and picks up a moth sitting in the same tree as him. Bringing the moth close to his face, he whispers to it; he then blows it gently, causing it to flutter away. The Wargs cease their growling and turn as the White Warg, with Azog on its back, approaches slowly. Thorin looks at Azog in shock.] [Thorin:] “Azog?!” [As his White Warg growls, Azog strokes it and talks ominously.] [Azog:] “Nuzdigid? Nuzdi gast?” [subtitle: Do you smell it? The scent of fear?] “Ganzilig­i unarug obod nauzdanish, Torin undag Train­ob.” [subtitle: I remember your father reeked of it, Thorin son of Thrain.] [Thorin looks stricken with pain and grief, realizing that Azog had captured his father.] [Thorin:] “It cannot be.” [Azog speaks to his Wargs and Riders.] [Azog:] “Kod, Toragid biriz.” [subtitle: That one is mine.] “Worori­da!” [subtitle: Kill the others!] [At his command, the Wargs leap forward and try to climb the trees. They jump as high as they can, scrabbling at the tree trunks and breaking apart branches in their jaws in their efforts. The trees shake violently at the assault, and the dwarves struggle to hold on.] 68[Azog:] “Sho gad adol!” [subtitle: Drink their blood!] [With the weight of the Wargs climbing it, the furthest tree from the edge of the cliff, which Bilbo and several other dwarves are in, gets uprooted from the ground and begins leaning wildly. As more Wargs grab onto it, the tree tips over and lands on the next tree; the dwarves and Bilbo jump from the falling tree to the next. However, this tree as well tips over; like dominoes, all the trees begin falling over. All the dwarves, Bilbo, and Gandalf manage to jump onto the last tree, on the very edge of the cliff. This tree doesn’t fall over. Azog laughs. Looking around in desperation, Gandalf spies a pinecone. He grabs it and uses his staff to set the pinecone on fire; he then throws it down amid the Wargs, who retreat in fear of the fire. Azog is startled and angry at the unexpected resistance. Gandalf lights two more pinecones and throws one down to Fili.] [Gandalf:] “Fili!” [Fili catches the pinecone. Bilbo and the dwarves gather pinecones and Gandalf sets them on fire; they then throw the flaming pinecones like missiles at the Wargs. All the area around the tree gets set on fire, forcing the Wargs to retreat a distance. At least one Warg gallops away with its fur alight. Azog roars in anger and frustration as the dwarves cheer. Suddenly, their cheers turn into cries of fear as the roots of the tree they are in start to give way; the tree tips precariously over the edge of the cliff, but comes to a rest sticking straight out away from the edge of the cliff. Gandalf looks down and sees the ground far, far, below. The dwarves try to hold on as they get flung around. Ori loses his grip on the tree and falls, but manages to grab on to Dori’s leg.] [Ori:] “Aahhh! Oh! Oh no!” [Dori:] “Mister Gandalf!” [Because of the extra weight, Dori loses his grip on the tree as well and falls, but Gandalf quickly swings his staff down and Dori grabs on to the end of it.] [Dori:] “Hold on, Ori!” [Azog growls; Thorin, clinging to the tree, looks at him in hate and anger. Thorin pulls himself up, his sword drawn, and walks down the leaning trunk as Bilbo and the others, hanging from the tree, look on. Thorin runs through the burning ground at Azog and his White Warg. Azog spreads his arms wide with a smug grin on his face. Thorin growls as he runs with his sword up and his oaken branch shield held in front of him. Azog crouches, then roars as his Warg leaps at Thorin. Thorin tries to swing his sword, but the Warg hits him in the chest with its forepaw, smashing Thorin to the ground. The other dwarves in the tree look on in shock. Dori struggles to hold on to Gandalf’s staff.] [Ori:] “Help!” [As Thorin gets back on his feet, panting, Azog and his White Warg wheel around; they charge at Thorin again. Azog swings his mace and smashes Thorin in the face before Thorin can react. Thorin is brutally flung to the ground by the impact.] [Balin:] “Nooo!” [Azog roars in excitement. Bilbo manages to stand up on the tree. The White Warg clamps its jaws around Thorin and Thorin yells in pain. Dwalin tries to get off and tree to assist Thorin, but the tree branches he is 69holding on to break, swinging him precariously over the edge and preventing him from reaching Thorin.] [Dwalin:] “Thorin! Nooo!” [As the White Warg holds Thorin in its mouth, Thorin manages to hit its head with the pommel of his sword. Roaring, the White Warg throws Thorin several feet away onto a flat rock nearby. Thorin lands heavily, his sword falling out of his hand. He is almost unconscious.] [Azog:] “Biriz torag khobdudol.” [subtitle: Bring me the Dwarf’s head.] [One of Azog’s Warg Riders jumps off his Warg and approaches Thorin. Bilbo, seeing this, pull out his own sword, which glows blue. The orc approaches Thorin and places its sword against his neck; raising the sword, the rider prepares to decapitate Thorin. As he swings his sword down, Bilbo throws himself at the orc and knocks him over. As they fight, Bilbo manages to stab and kill the orc. As Azog growls in anger, Thorin goes unconscious. Pulling his sword out of the dead orc’s body, Bilbo stands in front of the unconscious Thorin and protects his body. He waves his sword wildly at Azog and the other Wargs. Azog smiles in hatred and speaks in the Black Speech to his Orcs; the translated meaning is:] [Azog:] [subtitle: Kill him.] [A couple of Wargs and Riders approach Bilbo, snarling. Suddenly, Fili, Kili, and Dwalin, who have managed to get off the tree, plow into the Wargs from the side and start fighting them. In the confusion, Bilbo yells and leaps forward, wounding a Warg. The White Warg hits Bilbo with his head and sends him flying, however. As the fighting around them continues, Azog and his White Warg approach Bibo to kill him. Fili, Kili, and Dwalin have been surrounded by Wargs, and Bilbo is at Azog’s mercy. Suddenly, the moth returns to Gandalf. Dori slips from the end of Gandalf’s staff, and Dori and Ori fall toward the ground far below. An eagle swoops out of nowhere and catches them on its back; they yell in fear as they are carried swiftly away. Several more Eagles appear and join the fray. Some grab Wargs and Orcs and toss them over the cliff. Others knock down trees, which crush the Wargs below them. Another Eagle fans the flames with its wings, causing an inferno which burns the Wargs. Azog snarls in frustration. One Eagle gently grabs Thorin and his sword in its talons and flies away. As Thorin is lifted off the ground, his oaken branch shield slips off his arm and lands on the ground. Azog roars and jumps back as an Eagle flies by him; the Eagle heads straight for an alarmed Bibo and snatches him off the ground. It then throws Bilbo, and he screams as he falls toward the ground, only to land on the back of another Eagle. The rest of the Eagles proceed to snatch the dwarves out of the tree and fly away. When only Gandalf is left in the tree, the roots give way and the tree falls off the edge of the cliff. Gandalf leaps clear of it and is caught by an Eagle. As the Eagles fly away with all the Company, Azog and the few Warg Riders left growl in anger and frustration.] [The Eagles soar through the sky over a great distance and over many landscapes. Thorin lies unconscious in one Eagle’s talons; the others worry about him.] [Fili:] “Thorin!” [The Eagles approach a massive rock structure shaped like a bear; it is the Carrock. The Eagle carrying Thorin gently deposits him and his sword on a flat area on top of the Carrock. Another Eagle lands on the Carrock and Gandalf slides off its neck, running toward the unconscious Thorin.] 70[Gandalf:] “Thorin! Thorin.” [Thorin is not responding. Bilbo runs up. Gandalf places his hand on Thorin’s face and whispers a spell. Thorin’s eyes flutter open and he gasps for air. He speaks weakly.] [Thorin:] “The halfling?” [Gandalf:] “It’s all right. Bilbo is here. He’s quiet safe.” [By now, the other dwarves have all been landed on the Carrock, and they surround the wounded Thorin. Dwalin and Kili help Thorin up. However, once he’s up, he shrugs them off and approaches Bilbo.] [Thorin:] “You! What were you doing? You nearly got yourself killed! Did I not say that you would be a burden? That you would not survive in the wild and that you had no place amongst us?” [Thorin advances until he is face to face with Bilbo, who looks worried and frightened.] [Thorin:] “I’ve never been so wrong in all my life!” [Thorin grabs Bilbo and embraces him deeply. The other dwarves cheer loudly and slap each other on the back. Gandalf smiles. Bilbo, looking quite surprised, hugs Thorin back. ] [Thorin:] “I am sorry I doubted you.” [Bilbo:] “No, I would have doubted me too. I’m not a hero or a warrior...not even a burglar.” [As everyone chuckles, the Eagles fly away, screeching. Thorin looks beyond Bilbo and sees something; he strides forward, and the others follow his gaze.] [Bilbo:] “Is that what I think it is? [In the distance, on the horizon, they see the outline of a single, solitary mountain.] [Gandalf:] “Erebor—The Lonely Mountain. The last of the great dwarf kingdoms of Middle­earth.” [Thorin:] “Our home.” [A bird cheeps and flies by.] [Oin:] “A raven! The birds are returning to the mountain.” [More birdsong is heard.] [Gandalf:] “That, my dear Oin, is a thrush.” [Thorin:] “But we’ll take it as a sign ­ a good omen.” 71[Bilbo:] “You’re right. I do believe the worst is behind us.” [The Company looks on at the Lonely Mountain as the sun comes up behind them.] [The thrush flies across the Desolation of Smaug, flying in front of the ruined gates of Erebor, and then finally lands on a rock on the side of the mountain. It picks up a snail and bangs the snail shell against the side of the mountain. Inside the mountain, a massive pile of gold, coins, jewels, and treasures is piled up in the throne room, and the sounds of the thrush echo through the massive chambers. Some of the gold is blown away, revealing Smaug’s snout beneath the pile. As Smaug slowly raises his head from beneath the pile, more treasure falls away from his face. The camera focuses on his closed eye. Suddenly, his eye opens, and Smaug growls.] [The scene fades to black. As the credits roll, Neil Finn’s song “Song of the Lonely Mountain” plays.]

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